Chapter 8
Leland
Iwake slowly, sandwiched between two hot, hard male bodies. Sunlight is streaming through the windows, and I realize it’s the first time in a long time that I’ve slept through the night without nightmares.
My head is on Vince’s chest, my leg thrown over his thigh. Zac is pressed against my back, his arm over my hip and his fingers laced with Vince’s on his stomach. I snuggle deeper into Vince, not wanting to break the calm that I’ve found.
When we got here last night, Zac gently woke me up and gave me a bath to clean me up. Once that was done, Vince was waiting on the bed with soothing lotion for my sensitive ass.
I’m still reeling from my session with Vince because I didn’t think it would actually work, even after Oliver and Toby explained what it was.
Even though I was skeptical, I still found myself rushing to message Vince before I chickened out.
I expected him to spank me, I didn’t expect the floodgates that it opened.
At first the shit he was saying hurt worse than the paddle, and my safeword sat on the tip of my tongue.
Then something changed. I let myself feel what he was saying, admitting to myself that’s how I see myself.
A whore, a slut, and worthless. Someone who can’t do anything right and can’t listen for shit.
A fuck up. Then Vince’s words rolled through my head.
“I don’t like people talking bad about the people I care about. That includes you. If you have something you want to talk about, we’ll talk, but you won’t say things like that.”
I’ve never cried so hard in my life. After that dam broke,Vince was there to catch me.
He let me ruin his nice shirt with my tears and I never felt rushed to clean myself up, to pretend everything was okay.
Admitting to him that I have suicidal thoughts was hard as fuck, and the reason almost came out with it.
It probably would have if he kept pushing.
“Good morning, baby doll.”
I look up at the sound of Vince’s sexy sleep roughed voice. “Good morning, Daddy.” That slips out before I can stop it, but something about it just feels right. Especially after the breathtaking smile that takes over Vince’s face.
“I love hearing you say that.” He kisses my forehead. “How do you feel?”
“Sore but good.”
“That’s what I like to hear. Zac likes to sleep in on Saturdays. You want to help me fix breakfast?”
“Yeah.”
“We were hoping you would eventually spend the night, so we took the liberty of getting you some clothes to keep here. Top left drawer of the dresser.” Vince locks his hand around my throat and pulls me up to lay a hard kiss on my lips.
“You use our bathroom. I’ll go to the hall bathroom. Extra toothbrushes are under the sink.”
With that, he gives me one last kiss and slides from the bed, giving me a prime view of his ass in tight dark blue boxer briefs. I reach out and grab a handful because I can’t help myself, making Vince turn around with a brow raised.
“You like what you see, baby doll?”
“Absolutely. I kind of want to bite it.”
Vince laughs quietly under his breath so he doesn’t wake Zac. “Get up, Trouble. I’ll meet you in the kitchen.”
I pout when he walks away, taking his nice ass with him and I scoot out from under Zac’s arm.
When my feet hit the floor, I turn around to look at him, appreciating his nice body too.
Shaking my head at myself, I go to the bathroom to take care of business and brush my teeth.
It’s not until I’m rinsing my mouth out that I realize that the collar Vince put on me is still there.
I rub my fingers across the soft leather, letting my mind take me places that it shouldn’t go.
Like envisioning a life with Zac and Vince.
Me as their boy. But that’s fucking stupid.
They don’t need someone with all my problems to fuck up their happy life.
Pulling myself from those thoughts, I go back to the bedroom and open the drawer Vince indicated.
There’s underwear, socks, shirts, sweatpants and even a few pairs of jeans tucked in there.
I say fuck it to the underwear and grab a pair of sweatpants, sliding them up my legs.
Calling it good, I follow the sounds down the stairs and into the kitchen where Vince is already cooking.
I walk up behind him and slide my arms around his waist, burying my face in his back.
I’ve never been a cuddler, but something about Vince and Zac makes me want to soak up all of their affection.
“Well, hello there, baby doll,” Vince says without skipping a beat. “I’ve got eggs, bacon and sausage cooking.” My stomach growls loudly and Vince laughs. “I think someone is hungry.”
“Just a little,” I joke, hugging him one last time before stepping around him and pulling myself to sit on the counter. I just feel like I need to be close to him. “What are we doing today?”
“I figured we could just hang out here until we go to Inferno.” Vince’s eyes drill into mine when he drops that bomb again. “Oli wants to see you.”
“He wants to make sure I’m not falling apart.”
“There’s nothing wrong with that.” Vince goes back to cooking, but his attention is still on me. “Do you want to talk about what happened last night?”
I don’t even have to ask what he means. “Not really.”
“You know eventually you will have to. I won’t push yet, but if this is going to work, we need to know what sends you to that place so we don’t accidentally put you there.”
“It’s not something I can control,” I say much harsher than needed and immediately feel like shit. “I’m sorry.”
Vince sighs and turns the stove off. He takes everything off the burners and moves to stand in front of me. He grabs my hands and squeezes my fingers. “Why do you keep apologizing?”
“Because you don’t like disrespect.”
“Feelings aren’t disrespectful. Will I punish you for the eyerolls? A hundred percent. But I will never punish you for telling me how you feel. No matter how it comes out.”
“I guess I’m just confused how this all works.”
“And that’s normal. You just have to let me teach you.”
I look up at him and tug one of my hands free to rub it down his face. “I want to tell you everything, but I’m not ready yet. There’s a lot from my past that needs unpacked. I just don’t know if I can say the words.”
“We’ll wait however long you need, baby doll. We’re patient men.”
I laugh at that. “I’ve noticed.”
Vince grins and it transforms his face. “You’re well worth the wait. So perfect and hungry to learn.” My stomach growls again and Vince nods. “And hungry for food. Go wake Zac and I’ll make a plate.”
I peck his lips, hop down from the counter and skip from the room. Vince’s laugh follows me through the house and I run up the steps. Without missing a beat, I jump onto the bed with a bounce and climb on top of Zac’s sprawled body. His eyes flash open, and he smiles when he sees me.
“Daddy made breakfast,” I announce, kissing all over his face. Zac laughs and wraps his arms around my waist.
“I can smell it.” I kiss down his chin, neck and chest. When I get to his abs, I blow a raspberry and jump from the bed. “You little shit.”
“Come on. Get that sexy ass up and eat.”
I practically float back down the stairs, ready for whatever they have in store for me.
* * *
I lied.
I’m not ready for what they have in store for me. I was fine all day, cuddling, talking, snacking and watching movies. My nerves didn’t go into overdrive until we walked into Inferno. I feel like this is some sort of test, and I’m going to fail miserably.
Zac and Vince lead me upstairs to the VIP and I’m hit with a tornado called Oliver. He wraps his arms around my neck in a tight hug. “I’ve missed you.”
I chuckle and pat his back. “You just saw me.”
“Doesn’t matter.” He grabs my hand and leads me to sit on the couch, away from the guys. “You’re fucking glowing. Did you have a good session with Vince? Did it help? Are you guys together? Whoa, is that a fucking collar?”
I reach over and cover his mouth with my hand before my mind explodes.
“One question at a time, dude. Yes, it was a good session. We made progress. I don’t know if it helped or not, it was one time.
We aren’t together and yes, it’s a fucking collar.
They asked me to wear it while I was there this weekend. ”
Oliver’s eyes widen and squeals. “You’re staying at their house all weekend?”
“I need alcohol for this conversation.” A glass appears in front of me and I smile when I see Vince. “Thank you, Daddy.”
Vince leans down to kiss me slowly, making all the doubts about tonight disappear. I thought I would have a hard time showing affection for them in front of Oliver, but apparently I was wrong. Vince pulls back and his lips go to my ear. “Fix your friend before his head explodes.”
I look at Oliver and burst out laughing. His eyes are so big it looks like they are about to fall from his head. “You just called him Daddy,” Oliver hisses when Vince walks away. “D. A. D. D. Y. Daddy.”
“He likes it.” I shrug and take a sip of my drink. “So do I.”
“What do you call Zac?”
“Sir.”
Oliver clutches his hands over his heart. “Oh my God. That’s so fucking hot. You have to tell me everything.”
I dive into the story, starting from the first night up until now. I couldn’t tell him everything before because I was so confused, but it comes pouring out of me now. Oliver is practically melting by the time I finish and I give him a second to process.
“It’s been nice, for lack of a better word.”
“Leland, I’m so happy for you.”
“Don’t get ahead of yourself. I don’t know what’s going to happen after this weekend.”
Oliver snorts. “I know. You guys are going to fall madly in love and live happily ever after.”
I shove his shoulder. “Not everyone wants that.”
“Are you saying you don’t?”
“I’m saying I don’t know if I’m built for that. Zac and Vince already have this amazing life and history together.”