Chapter 34
The evening broke up soon after Davy’s spectacular walkout. While the others fussed around, dividing up the birthday cake while Ryan and Jago argued jovially over who was paying the bill, Anya busied herself packing up Freya’s things. She’d already worked out what their food had cost and she’d sort it out with whoever ended up winning in the next couple of days. ‘Come on, poppet, time to go,’ she said to Freya in her best encouraging voice.
‘I’m tired, Mummy.’ Freya held up her arms, refusing to stand.
Seeing she was on the edge of being too tired that could easily tip over into tears, Anya crouched and picked her up. ‘Oof, you’re getting too big to be carried,’ she said as she braced Freya on her hip. ‘Let’s give Ma her card and present, then it’s home to bed for us, young lady.’
Anya fumbled with the handbag hanging over her opposite shoulder, trying to keep hold of Freya with one hand.
‘Here, let me.’ The strain in her arm disappeared as Rick lifted Freya up like she weighed nothing .
‘Thanks, I won’t be a sec.’
She quickly worked her way around the table and handed Ma her card and the apron she’d made for her. ‘Thank you so much for inviting us,’ she said, pressing a kiss to Ma’s cheek.
‘Thank you for coming.’ She unfolded the apron and held it up. ‘Oh, this is beautiful, thank you. Did you have a nice time?’
‘It was great. I’m going to dash though, because it’s way past Freya’s bedtime.’
Ma laughed. ‘She’s not the only one! We can catch up in the morning when you drop her off. Go on, get that poor child home to bed.’
Though she’d only been gone a couple of minutes, Freya was fast asleep on Rick’s shoulder, her arms clasped around his neck. Anya held out her hands to take her. ‘I don’t mind carrying her,’ he said, quietly. ‘I know you don’t need my help, Anya, but I really don’t mind.’
She stared up at him for a long minute. Was she really going to risk waking Freya up on a point of principle? Yes, she could manage to carry her home, but it would be bloody hard work. ‘Thank you.’ She glanced around but everyone else was still chatting and didn’t look like they would be on the move anytime soon. ‘I don’t think we should wait for the others, if you don’t mind?’
‘Whatever you need is fine with me.’ Rick gestured towards the door before laying a large, protective hand on Freya’s back to hold her safe. She’d always be safe with him .
The truth of it burned deep into Anya’s bones as they strolled along the seafront in silence. Yes, he’d lied to her, but Rick was nothing like Drew. Everything he did was for other people’s benefit, whereas Drew had only ever been out for himself.
I don’t think anyone has ever stopped to ask him what he needs . Anya realised she had no idea because they had never taken the time to actually get to know each other. Not really.
The sun was setting, turning the horizon where the sky met the sea into a molten river of fire. It was so beautiful, Anya had to stop and watch as orange turned to red, to shades of violet and indigo and finally to the soft grey of a dove’s wing.
‘I never get tired of that,’ Rick said with a sigh as they began to walk again.
‘Do you like living here?’
She could sense him glance down at her but she kept her eyes fixed on the path. ‘In the Quay? Sure, I mean it’s the only place I’ve ever known, but yeah, I’m happy here.’
‘And it’s never bothered you, that you didn’t get to move to London like Liam did?’
Rick was quiet for a moment as though considering the question. ‘I think I was jealous now and then when I was younger, but I’m not sure living there has done Liam much good in the long run.’
‘And what about working for your parents?’
Rick’s chuckle was soft. ‘What’s with all the questions?’
She stopped and looked up at him. ‘I’m just interested. I’ve known you all my life and yet somehow I feel like I don’t know you at all.’
‘I thought we’d got to know each other very well.’ Rick’s voice was husky and she was glad the sun had set and she couldn’t really make out his expression.
‘Yes, we did, and maybe that’s part of the problem. We went about things all the wrong way, rushed ahead before either of us was ready.’
He was silent for a long time before he finally nodded. ‘I… I think I was so caught up in the idea of you that I never really sa w you beyond what you’ve always meant to me, and I’m sorry about that.’
Anya sighed. ‘And having someone to take care of me again was too tempting. I know now that what I really need is to learn to take care of myself.’
‘You seem to be doing a pretty good job of that.’
Warmth spread through her at the clear admiration in his tone. ‘I’m not so sure. Call me a work in progress.’
‘Is that all I’ll ever be able to call you?’
Reaching up, she dashed a tear from her lashes, grateful again that it was almost dark. ‘I’d like it one day if we could call each other friends.’
‘Friends sounds good.’
It did sound good. And some day perhaps they’d be able to call each other more than that. ‘Maybe we could start again. Forget the past couple of months and try and get things right this time.’
‘Is that what you want?’ The hope in his voice was a match for the delicate flame of it glowing inside her.
‘What about what you want?’
‘I want you. I want Freya. I want all three of us to be a family one day. I want it to be you and me sitting at a table in fifty years’ time surrounded by our children and grandchildren as we celebrate a life well lived together.’
Wetness soaked her cheeks. ‘I want that too, but I don’t think I’m in the right place for that just yet.’
Rick’s warm hand circled her shoulder, pulling her against his side, but oh so carefully so they didn’t disturb Freya. He pressed a kiss on her hair. ‘The best things in life are worth waiting for, Anya. We’ve got time.’
She curled her arms around his waist and leaned in to the comforting strength of his body. For a moment she was tempted to throw caution to the wind and say to hell with waiting. But Rick deserved her at her best. She didn’t want someone to look after her. She wanted someone she could look after too. A partnership. A foundation solid enough they could build a happy life together on it. ‘I promise it’ll be worth waiting for.’
Rick tilted his head and rested it on top of hers. ‘I’ll wait as long as you need and next time it’ll be perfect.’
Anya shook her head. ‘No, it’ll be better than perfect; it’ll be the real thing.’ She’d learned the hard way that perfection was an illusion, and she’d never make that mistake again. When the time was right, she wanted everything with Rick: the good, the bad and all the wonderful messy in-between bits. Because those were the foundations they could build a life on. Build a love on that would carry them through the years to come. This was just the beginning of their story.