Chapter 38
Oliver
The beer in my hand is cold, the glass wet with condensation.
Bringing it to my lips, I take a sip, enjoying the bitter taste on my tongue.
Zander is telling us about the holiday he’s booked in the summer.
Some of the other guys chime in with their plans, and I listen intently, not offering anything but a nod at the appropriate times.
It’s Zander’s birthday, and he practically dragged us all here after work for a pint.
I couldn’t find an excuse to get out of it – not that I wanted to.
Being here, with my boss and my colleagues, is far nicer than sitting alone at home, waiting.
It’s not lost on me, or any of the guys around the table, that this is the first time I’ve gone out with them after work.
At some point, I made the unconscious decision that I don’t want to push people away anymore.
I want friends. I want nights out with the people I work with.
Hell, I even want more double dates with Caiden and Jamie.
The reminder of our night clubbing has me reaching for my phone, opening to the last message I sent Darius. The one I am still waiting for him to respond to.
Me: Did I ruin us?
I could dwell on it, but I’ve made the effort to be here tonight, so I pocket my phone, turning my focus back on the group and the conversation.
“Can I get you another drink?” Zander asks, motioning towards my half empty glass.
“No, definitely not – it’s your birthday. I’ll get the next round.”
There’s cheers from my three colleagues and an arm is slung over my shoulder, steering me towards the bar.
We have one more round before Zander excuses himself to join his girlfriend for dinner. I say my goodbyes too, making my way to the train station. My body aches as I climb the stairs to the platform and I grimace, biting the inside of my cheek.
The paramedic who examined me in the flat suggested I ride with Darius to A&E so that I could be more thoroughly checked, but I declined, wanting to give him the space he clearly wanted.
So, I made my way by cab to an A&E department closer to my place.
After a four-hour wait, x-rays and a thorough exam, I left with a glue strip over my cheek where Floyd’s wedding ring tore the skin, and a body covered in bruises, including some deep purple patches over my ribs.
But worse than that, I left not knowing where Darius and I stand. I still don’t.
I get that he’s pissed at me – I overstepped. But I cannot bring myself to regret it. Not when I know that he’s safe now.
My journey home is uneventful, and by the time I reach my road, hunger is tugging at my belly.
I didn’t eat much today – a protein bar on the way to work and an apple at lunchtime – so the three drinks I had at the pub are sloshing uncomfortably in my stomach.
Before I reach my flat, I stop at a takeaway and order a chip roll and a can of soda, then, white plastic bag in hand, I make my way home.
Taking the stairs slower than I usually would, I huff a breath at the bite of pain that flames around my ribs with each movement.
At the top of the stairs, I turn left into the corridor that leads to the two flats on this floor, my feet coming to halt when I catch sight of the man sitting on my doorstep.
Darius has his knees up, and his arms crossed over them. His head is bent, but he looks up when he hears me approach. His beautiful blue eyes – the ones I see in my dreams – connect with mine and my heart skips a beat.
Fuck, I’ve missed him.
“Are you stalking me now?” I ask, digging in my back pocket for my key, the plastic bag dangling from my wrist. “Could have sworn you need a key to open the lobby door.”
“Maybe I am.” Darius grins. “Your kind neighbour let me in.” Using one hand, he pushes to stand, moving to the side so that I can unlock. In silence, I open up and walk inside, the air shifting around me as Darius follows, shutting the door behind us.
In the kitchen, I put my phone, keys, and wallet on the counter, along with my chip roll. Then I turn to face the love of my life.
He looks good. Better than he did when I last saw him. I ache to pull him into my arms, to kiss every inch of his body and never let him go.
“Would you like a drink?” I ask, hating how stiff the air between us is.
“No. Thanks.”
“Okay.”
Darius makes an uncomfortable sound somewhere between a huff and a chuckle. “Even when we were strangers, it didn’t feel as awkward as this.”
“I knew where we stood then,” I reply. “You told me before I’d even walked through the door. Now,” I shake my head, “now I’m not so –”
“I love you,” Darius blurts, taking a step forward.
“I love you and I never want to spend another day apart. I want to wake up next to you every morning for the rest of our lives. I want to wear your ring and buy that cottage and plant sunflowers together. I want all of it – a future. With you. If that’s still what you want? ”
Closing the space between us, I press a palm to his warm cheek and tip his face so that our eyes meet.
“There has never been a moment that I haven’t wanted that, angel.
I know I upset you –” Darius starts to respond, but I shake my head.
“Hold on, let me say this first, please. I did something you asked me not to and in hindsight, maybe I should have left it until we’d talked it over.
But I was just so angry and scared for you. ”
Darius presses his lips to mine, and it’s like for the past two days my heart hasn’t beat correctly. And now it does, because he’s here and he loves me.
“I know, puppy,” Darius starts, “when Darcey told me where you went, I felt the same. I was confused about what to do, and I honestly thought I could handle it on my own.” He runs a hand over the back of my neck, and I shiver at the gentle caress.
“I’m sorry I overstepped,” I admit, resting my forehead against his. “I’ve been there, D. I’ve lived a life where I dealt with everything alone. And I didn’t want that for you. I wanted to protect you.”
“Like someone should have protected you,” he says in a whisper.
His words cause my throat to tighten, and I swallow thickly to clear the lump lodged there. “Yes. I need you to know that despite what you might think now, you can trust me. With all of you. I promise. I would never hurt or betray you.”
“I know you won’t, and I’ve never doubted that I can trust you, Ollie.”
Darius kisses me again, this time slipping his tongue between the seams of my lips. I open for him and he deepens the kiss, his hand slipping beneath my hoodie, moving it up my torso until his soft palm rests over my heart.
“You’re the best thing to ever happen to me, Oliver Cross. You’re my beautiful storm and I am going to love you today, tomorrow and in every lifetime that comes after.”
With my lips pressed to his, I lift Darius, and he wraps his legs around me. I flinch, the sharp pain in my side reminding me about my injured ribs. Darius pulls back, his nose wrinkled in concern. “Maybe you should put me down.”
“Not a chance,” I say, kissing him once more, ignoring the bite of pain while edging us towards my bed. “I’m never letting you go again.”
His lips lift against mine. “Good.”
When we reach my bed, I lay him down softly on the rumpled sheets. His blond hair fans out around his head, and he looks at me with eyes full of affection. His jumper has lifted, showing off a sliver of fair skin above the waistband of his jeans.
“You’re so beautiful.” Kneeling on the bed, I spread his legs, then crawl between them, resting a hand on either side of his head.
“Perfection.” Bending my elbows, I lower myself down, bringing my lips to the side of his neck, just beneath his ear.
I hold my weight off him, so as not to press against his injuries.
“Gorgeous,” I whisper, tasting the salty-sweetness of his skin with the flat of my tongue. “All mine.”
He shivers, his breath ghosting my skin when he says. “And you’re all mine.”
Sitting back on my knees, I wordlessly help Darius until he’s sitting up. Then I lift the hem of his jumper and t-shirt, pulling them over his head, revealing a lacy black bralette. His skin is marred with purple bruises, and I gently run my palm over one particularly bad spot on his side.
“Are you sure you’re okay to do this? Maybe we should wait.” There is no doubt in my mind that he must be in some pain and I wouldn’t want to cause him any more.
“I’m sure.” He places his hand over mine. “Are you?”
I nod, thinking of my own bruises which ache, but not enough to stop me from making love to the man sitting opposite me.
Darius leans forward and captures my lips with his, licking into my mouth as he strips off my hoodie and t-shirt.
“We’ll go slow,” he mumbles before he shuffles forward and climbs into my lap, a leg on either side of my thighs, our chests connecting, hearts beating in unison.
My hands map the planes of his naked skin, along the curve of his spine, down to the dimples on his lower back.
He rests his injured wrist on my shoulder, while his other hand grips the back of my neck.
We kiss until my lungs scream for oxygen and then we kiss a little more. Our cocks are hard, pushing together as we grind our hips. When we eventually break away, we’re both panting and Darius’s blue eyes are dark and sparkling.
His lips are glossy and swollen, and when he licks them, I dive forward and capture his bottom one between my teeth. Darius moans, the hand on the back of my neck squeezing to the point of pain.
“Need you,” he mumbles, releasing me and bringing his hand between us, fumbling with the button of my cargo pants.