Chapter 23 #3
“No, I’m not dating anyone. But I can’t be romantically involved with anyone right now. I’ve worked really hard to get here. And you…” He hesitates. “You needed so much from me, and I just can’t. Not right now. I tried dating, casually, but I realized it’s too hard to keep up with everything.”
“It was hard for me, too,” she says. “On the rare occasions you did come to visit, you just ignored me…”
Glancing around nervously, he lowers his voice. “I was only ignoring you when you were being kind of psychotic.”
This is not how she envisioned the evening unfolding. They were supposed to reconcile—to profess their undying love for one another. Instead, he has rejected her. She exposed her vulnerability, only for him to crush her heart once more.
Heartbroken, she cries, “You tried to forget me!” A few bystanders turn as her voice rises. “You wanted to erase me!”
He pulls her into his arms again, trying to soothe her, but she remains tense, tears streaming down her face.
“I had to focus on school, Lila,” he begins, his words slow and measured, as if afraid of provoking another outburst. “And you had to help your grandmother run her business. Medical school isn’t easy, you know? I really did try to dedicate all my spare time to you.”
“I never said it was easy,” she sobs.
“So you should have been more understanding,” he replies quietly. “It just wasn’t the right time for us.”
A painful flashback overtakes her, bringing back the moment she was caught going through his phone.
He’d stepped out of the shower to find her scrolling through his gallery.
Months of suspicion about his faithfulness had been building, and eventually, curiosity won.
Though she didn’t find anything incriminating, his browsing history revealed porn.
She didn’t understand why he needed it when he had her.
The discovery enraged her, igniting their most heated argument.
In a fit of fury, she’d thrown his laptop against the wall, breaking it.
She had hoped he would forgive her for snooping and destroying his computer. She thought he would understand that her outburst was driven entirely by insecurity and the fear of losing him. Things can be replaced, after all. But how could he ever find another woman who loved him as much as she did?
“So… what about now?” she asks, pulling away. Desperation trembles in her voice, her gaze intense. “I’m all better now. Really. That was a year ago, and you’ve graduated. Can we get back together? I miss you. And—and I still love you,” she pleads, stumbling over her words.
She realizes it then: as long as someone as sweet and kind as Jake can still love her, she can’t be that bad.
The anguish on his face hits her like a punch to the gut. She can feel him slipping away again.
“Did you really mean it when you said you missed me?” she asks.
“Of course,” he says. “I missed you a lot.”
“I’ve been waiting for you,” she whispers, her voice trembling. She’s on the verge of breaking again, and the humiliation burns. She hadn’t wanted to cry so pitifully in front of him.
“Lila…”
“Kiss me,” she begs. “Please. Kiss me like you’ve missed me.”
After a moment’s hesitation, he leans down.
Gently tilting her chin upward, he kisses her softly.
The tenderness awakens dormant butterflies in her stomach.
Unlike the fevered kisses of her tormentor that ignite burning desire, this one brings calm—something protective.
She feels it soothe her inner pain. His lips linger as the chilly night breeze dries her tear-streaked cheeks.
She waited a whole year for this moment, and it is worth every second.
“Are you doing anything for Thanksgiving?” he asks, his voice husky.
“Why?” she asks hesitantly, hope bubbling within her.
“Maybe we can meet up again. We can take things slow.”
“I would love that,” she says with a small smile.
Deep down, her stomach twists into a hard knot as guilt washes over her.
It feels like a betrayal to walk away from him and return to another man’s side.
She tells herself it’s only temporary, that Jake never has to know.
Once the arrangement is over, she will bury every memory of Max deep down, locking them away with her other dark secrets.
For Jake, she would do anything and everything. He will never truly understand how deeply she loves him. They were together for four years, but she had been in love with him long before that. She wonders if he will ever begin to grasp even a fraction of it.
After all, she had left everything behind and traveled thousands of miles just to be near him.
But it is a secret she will have to carry to her grave.
Jake, with his scrupulous nature, would never comprehend it. He might even fear her if he ever learned the truth.
She had once wondered how she would stage their first meeting as a happy, fateful run-in, but this feels so much better. His reaching out after a year proves they are fated to be together… forever.
Jake is her one true love, and she’s overjoyed to hear confirmation that he has been missing her, too. In just over a week, she will finally be free of Max, and she and Jake can pick up right where they left off…
A short while later, Lila is back at Max’s apartment, positioned on all fours in front of the floor mirror.
City light filters into his bedroom, casting a soft glow through the dimness and highlighting the curve of her back, the tension etched into her posture.
Her reflection stares back at her, heavy breasts swaying as Max thrusts into her silky tightness from behind.
She quickly averts her gaze to the side.
“How are you always so horny?” she grunts. His movements feel urgent, almost erratic.
“Look at yourself,” he says, gathering her hair into his fist. She arches her back, instinctively trying to ease the strain.
Seeing herself in the mirror, so exposed and vulnerable, a rush of heat sweeps over her.
She tries to turn away, but he tightens his grip, keeping her head in place. “How could I not be?”
He suddenly pulls out of her and carries her to the bed, laying her on her back in one swift motion. He kisses her deeply, his tongue slipping between her parted lips in search of hers.
She arches again as he slides into her once more, groaning at the slight discomfort deep inside as he pushes too far, too fast. The way he takes her tonight feels rougher than usual.
“Oh, Lila.” His breathing turns ragged as he lifts her ankles and settles them onto his shoulders.
Her leg muscles burn as he folds her nearly in half.
He draws back at a cruel, torturously slow pace before plunging inward again, each thrust deliberate, punishingly rough.
“Lila. Lila. Lila,” he repeats, letting her name punctuate every stroke. “Who are you thinking of?”
“Huh?” Her mind, swimming in pleasure, feels utterly fogged. She can’t think straight.
“Who’s on your mind right now?” he rasps, barely holding back the urge to lose control.
“You!” she grunts as he drives into her again, his tip pressing hard against her cervix. Her thoughts scream in protest.
You’re the one fucking my brains out!
Her fingers tighten around the bedsheet. “Max!”
He leans over her with his fist tangled in her hair once more. “Only I can make you feel like this. Understand?”
“Aah,” she cries. “Yes!”
Satisfied, he quickens his pace. Each thrust is fast and controlled, edged with the level of roughness he knows she responds to.
“Fuuuck,” she moans.
“Do you like it, babygirl?”
“Yes. I love it. It feels so good,” she croons, every word stretching as her mind melts with pleasure.