Chapter 4 #2
No, no, no. This isn’t happening. Kaden kept telling himself not to freak out. There had to be a logical explanation except he struggled to come up with one.
Aren’t you pleased I healed you?
“I know you meant well, but maybe ask if there’s a next time.” Oh God, what am I saying?
What if you’re dying and can’t speak?
Kaden jolted. “How much can you do?”
Probably not re-attach your head. All other limbs I can give back to you.
“Shiiit.”
So don’t lose your head, just in case.
“Oh God. Don’t joke.”
I’m not joking.
Fuck! “I wish you hadn’t gone inside me. I was teaching you. You were learning.”
I had insufficient data to enable replication.
Kaden tensed. Replication? But then he’d seen himself sitting on his bed after Joe had mapped him. “You want to be exactly the same as me?”
No. Not exactly the same. I needed to know more. I thought it was best done as fast as I could while I was still small. I’m sorry I hurt you. Really sorry.
What the fuck have I done? Kaden let out a choked cry. “I don’t want you inside me.”
I’m not able to leave you yet.
Kaden slid down in bed and curled up. If he went back to sleep, would he wake up in his old world?
You are wonderful.
Kaden didn’t feel wonderful.
You have a very interesting biological structure, yet there is metal in you too.
Kaden’s hand slid to his heart. “That’s my pacemaker. Not everyone has one of those. It’s to keep my heartbeat steady.”
Yes.
“Breathing is essential too. You choked me.”
It was the best way to get inside you.
“Right, well you can leave now.”
Not yet.
Kaden swallowed hard He couldn’t force Joe out.
Sticking his fingers down his throat hadn’t worked before and wasn’t going to now.
He suspected Joe was somehow everywhere inside him, in his veins and arteries, in every cell.
And even though he’d healed the damage done by Harris, he could also kill him.
No! I don’t want to hurt you. He sounded indignant.
“You’ve already hurt me.”
Sorry.
Kaden sucked in a breath as he realised what he’d missed. Joe could hear him thinking. Did he not need to speak out loud?
No, you don’t have to. I can mostly hear your thoughts but I like hearing your voice. It’s soothing and it will help me understand others.
Kaden was trembling again now. Adrenaline surging… But as quickly as he’d felt anxious and afraid, the feelings faded.
“Did you do that? Make me not worry?”
Yes. I don’t want you to be frightened.
“Don’t mess around with my feelings. If I want to be scared, let me be scared.”
You want to be scared?
Kaden groaned. “No! I don’t want to be scared, but I don’t want you interfering with the way I feel.” That somehow seemed to make everything worse. Panic surged, and faded again.
Did you want Harris to hurt you? Was it a game? Usual behaviour?
Chills whispered up Kaden’s spine until Joe stopped them. “No, it wasn’t a game. I didn’t want him to do that to me.”
I heard you shout out but I couldn’t get to you.
Kaden chewed his fingernail. Yet again, he wondered if this was actually happening. If Harris hadn’t come and beaten him up? Maybe he had a brain tumour. That was worrying but—
Your brain is fascinating. There is no tumour. There’s nothing wrong with it. I like it.
“Why didn’t you ask first before you did that to me?”
Because I can speak English so well.
“Sarcasm?” Kaden dragged his fingers through his hair.
I learned it from you. Even if I’d been able to ask, you’d have said no.
Yes, he would have.
But I’d have died if I’d stayed as I was.
Kaden gritted his teeth.
You don’t want me to die. You saved me. And this way, I get to speak to you, right?
“But it’s my body.”
Which we’re temporarily sharing. A type of mutualism. We both benefit. Think of me as a passenger, hitching a ride, an invisible friend, but someone who can protect you. Because I can protect you properly now. Harris will never hurt you again.
Kaden’s mind flew into hyperdrive. Joe could hear everything that went through his mind and there was nothing he could do about it. When he used the bathroom, when he wrapped his hand around— He snapped off the thought.
When you wrapped your hand around what?
Kaden’s heart started to race again. He’d been body snatched by an alien.
Fucking hellfire. Was this really happening?
He tried not to think of any of the sci-fi movies he’d watched where things didn’t work out so well for the human, which of course ensured that his mind flooded with unpleasant images.
Don’t! Yuck, that’s revolting. I’d never do that.
Kaden almost enjoyed Joe’s reaction. Served him right. Until he remembered. And thought again about eggs.
“Can you lay eggs? You said no eggs but was that true? Are you using me as an incubator for thousands of babies?”
What? No.
But was that a lie?
I’m not lying.
Of course, he’d say that. Shit.
I’m not lying! Look. Just ignore me.
“You said we’re temporarily sharing. How long is temporary?”
Until I can survive on my own.
“And how long will that take?”
I don’t know, but if I come out of you too soon, I’ll perish.
“But you will be able to come out of me at some point?”
Yes.
Kaden was pretty sure Joe hesitated before he answered but he didn’t want to think too hard about that.
It’ll be okay. I can help you. We can—
“Please don’t talk to me. I just need to get my head straight.”
Kaden curled up as tight as he could. Was there anything he could do? Tell a friend? See a doctor? Go to the police?
Joe huffed.
“You said you’d be quiet.”
Sorry.
“Is there any point asking you not to listen in to my thoughts?”
I can try.
If he told the truth to anyone, they’d think he was crazy. No one would believe him, not even his dad. Maybe he was crazy. He’d imagined the whole thing, never taken Joe out of that tank, never been to work with Harris, not been attacked by Harris. Tears trickled down Kaden’s cheeks.
You’re leaking! What can I do? Tell me! Let me help.
That made Kaden give a quiet chuckle. “I’m crying. It’s just an overload of emotion. Not anything that needs fixing.”
So he couldn’t tell anyone and he couldn’t do anything because there was no way of ejecting Joe.
There was no operation that could remove him.
Joe was everywhere. Until he decided to leave, Kaden was stuck with him.
And he was scared. Really scared. He felt a warm rippling sensation down his back, then it happened again.
As if Joe was stroking him, comforting him.
Kaden wanted to tell him to stop, but he didn’t.
I’m scared too. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done it. I know. I made a mistake. I should have asked. I should have warned you. I wanted to help you and I’ve made things worse.
Kaden released a shaky sigh.
But we can work it out. Don’t worry. Sleep now. You need to rest.
His racing mind slowed and his eyelids fluttered closed.
“Are you making me fall asleep?”
There was no answer, but Kaden wasn’t awake to hear one.
~~~
Joe deeply regretted hurting Kaden. Of all the things he’d done in his life, doing that had been the worst. To hurt someone who’d been kind to him was perhaps unforgiveable.
It had been harder than he’d thought to enter his body, taken longer than he’d anticipated and distressed Kaden more than he’d imagined.
But once he’d started, he couldn’t stop or they would have both perished.
He hadn’t been lying when he’d said he’d have died if he’d stayed as he was, but he didn’t know how long that would have taken.
Days? Weeks? The longer he was outside Kaden, the bigger he’d have grown, and then doing what he’d just done would have killed at least one of them, probably both.
Now he had to learn everything he could in order to pass as human.
He had to be sure he could replicate a human’s body with a face different to Kaden’s before he attempted to emerge.
He had no idea how long he could stay inside him without causing harm.
He’d already caused harm and he was truly sorry.
He just needed Kaden to stay calm and keep quiet.
Telling anyone would be a mistake. Joe might be able to stop him speaking but…
Staying calm himself was difficult. Joe was struggling under the weight of everything he’d absorbed from Kaden’s body and brain.
So many facts, memories, experiences, sensations, feelings, emotions…
He liked Kaden. But he knew he was freaking him out and he had to find a way to stop that happening.
Not telling him he could access all his memories was a start.
At least he thought it was all his memories. How could he know?