Chapter 11
Kaden came round slowly.
He didn’t need to open his eyes to know he was in a hospital bed.
He’d been in enough of them. The antiseptic smell, sheets too stiff to ever feel comforting, along with the low hum of machines watching him and others.
Voices murmured somewhere nearby and there was pressure on the back of his hand. A drip, then. Oh God.
What he didn’t know was what the hell had happened to him.
A problem with his heart? Was this down to Harris?
Had he finally gone too far? He tried to swallow, couldn’t and pain flared.
His throat felt burned and scraped, as though he’d swallowed something corrosive.
He didn’t want to imagine what that might be.
No way would he have done that voluntarily.
Why couldn’t he remember what had happened?
“Kaden!”
Oh fuck. He knew that voice without looking. Could he pretend to be asleep? If Harris had done this, he didn’t want to be anywhere near him.
“I know you’re awake,” Harris said.
Kaden opened his eyes. Harris stood by the bed looking genuinely freaked out. Kaden tried to speak, but nothing came out of his mouth. Not even a croak. What the hell? And what were those fading bruises under Harris’ eyes?
“What happened to you?”
He sounded concerned, but then, if it was Harris who’d hurt him, he’d want to protect himself by playing innocent.
Did he think Kaden would just accept this?
But he didn’t know what this was. Maybe Harris hadn’t hurt him.
Why couldn’t he remember? It was also possible that Harris’ concern was not for him but for himself.
Hospitals were not one of Harris’ favourite places.
Too many germs. Too many opportunities to die from some hospital-borne issue.
A nosocomial infection. What? That brought Kaden up short. How do I know that word?
A nurse appeared at Harris’ shoulder, the gentle smile on her face aimed at Kaden. “You’re awake.”
Oh, you noticed? Good to know he wasn’t too sick for sarcasm.
He didn’t feel ill exactly, just a little battered, with a painful throat.
He wondered again if Harris had gone too far.
Had he brought Kaden to the hospital but was denying that he’d hurt him?
Kaden couldn’t claim that he had if he didn’t remember.
Was this another I didn’t mean to do it but you made me moment?
That it felt probable rather than possible scared him considerably more than the issue with his throat. Why haven’t I dumped him?
He tried to speak. Failed again. Panic flared and his heart raced. How could he make them send Harris away?
The nurse lifted a plastic beaker with a straw. “Small sip,” she instructed.
He was so thirsty, he sucked hard and the water had barely touched his throat before he gagged, chest jerking as muscles spasmed. His eyes watered and panic wrapped around him, biting like barbed wire. What the hell has happened to me?
Harris grabbed his hand and held so tight that Kaden couldn’t pull away, though he tried.
“Another sip,” the nurse said.
Kaden tried again. This time it went down. But it hurt.
“We looked at your phone,” the nurse continued. “Your top two contacts were your dad and your boyfriend.” She smiled at Harris, then turned to Kaden. “Your dad’s on his way.”
Kaden managed to tug free of Harris’ hold and mimed writing.
“I’ll get you a pad.” The nurse stepped away.
Harris leaned in close, his breath warm against Kaden’s ear. “Someone stick a monster cock down your throat?” He sniggered. “Fucking serves you right, you wanker. Now we’re even for this.” He pointed at his face, then suddenly clutched his stomach. “Ah fuck!”
Kaden felt as if he’d been thrown into freezing water. He was paralysed with shock. What did Harris mean? And why was he holding his stomach?
“Kaden!”
His dad rushed to his side, breathing heavily, his eyes sharp with worry. “Are you okay?”
Kaden glanced at Harris, who was still doubled over, then back at his dad, silently begging him to understand.
“You can leave, Harris,” his dad said flatly. “Why are you even here? You’re no longer his boyfriend.”
He isn’t? Kaden was stunned.
Harris opened his mouth, clearly thought better of it, and stumbled off. Did what was wrong with Harris have something to do with what was the matter with him? When had he and Harris finished? Kaden couldn’t remember telling… What could he remember?
The nurse returned with paper and pencil and handed it to him.
“What’s happened?” his dad asked.
He was looking at Kaden, but the nurse answered. “Kaden was found unconscious in a hospital toilet. He managed to pull the emergency cord.”
I did?
“The drip?”
“He’s dehydrated and his throat is extremely sore and bruised.”
“Oh. It’s not his heart then?”
“I’ll get the doctor to speak to you.”
His dad turned to him, shock all over his face. “What the hell has happened?”
Kaden pointed at his mouth and shook his head.
“You can’t speak?”
Another shake.
“Write it down.”
Oh shit. Write what down? I have no idea what’s happened?
Kaden wrapped his fingers awkwardly around the pencil, let his hand tremble and scratched uselessly at the paper like he couldn’t make the letters behave. It was close to the truth. He allowed despair to flood his face—that part wasn’t even hard. He didn’t understand why he couldn’t remember.
His dad studied him for a long moment, then stroked Kaden’s hair. “You can raise one finger for yes. Two for no. Right?”
Bloody smart arse.
“Did you do this to yourself?”
Kaden’s breath hitched. Two fucking fingers! Except…had he? No, why would he? He grew increasingly agitated.
“Calm down.”
He wasn’t sure he wanted to. Panicking seemed perfectly acceptable in the circumstances.
“Did someone hurt you?”
Kaden shrugged.
“You don’t know?”
He shook his head. But if he hadn’t done it to himself, then someone must have. Harris? But why make that suggestion about a monster cock? Unless he was being…cocky. But wouldn’t he have whispered to Kaden to keep quiet about what had happened?
“Did it happen in the hospital?”
Kaden shrugged again. He wanted to know as much as his dad did.
“Does this have anything to do with Jalis?”
Jalis? Who the hell was that? Had his dad meant to say Harris? Kaden picked up the pad again and wrote in shaky letters—it was genuinely tricky— Can’t remember. Take me home.
“If I can, but I’m not sure you’re ready to be let out.”
“Mr Bauer?”
A doctor approached and shook his dad’s hand.
“What’s happened to my son? You do know Kaden has a pacemaker.”
“Yes, we’re aware. We saw the card in his wallet. As for what’s happened, we’re not sure. Kaden’s suffered blunt-force trauma to his throat and oesophagus. There’s significant internal bruising extending down to his stomach.”
“Something was forced down his throat?” His dad sounded horrified. Not as horrified as Kaden felt.
“There’s nothing in his stomach so… We took x-rays. No foreign objects were found inside you, Kaden. Apart from the pacemaker. Your teeth weren’t damaged so whatever it was that was forced into your mouth, it wasn’t something rigid. Nor was it corrosive. But it was large.”
Kaden swallowed hard, then regretted it when it hurt.
“Could I have a private word with your son?” the doctor asked.
His dad hesitated, then stepped away. The doctor drew the curtains around the bed.
“Did someone sexually assault you?”
Kaden shook his head, then hesitated and lifted his shoulders in a hopeless shrug.
“You don’t know?”
He shook his head again.
“Because the injury pattern suggests that something large was forced into your mouth and down your throat. Unlikely to be a penis but…possibly an oversized sex toy? Ridged silicon of some sort? Not the soft toy we found in your bag.”
Kaden lifted his shoulders again. Oh God. He hoped he looked as appalled as he felt. But that explained the penguin that sat on the bedside cabinet.
“Have you taken any drugs? Could drugs have been slipped into your food or drink without you knowing?”
Maybe Kaden’s horrified expression told him the answer. But not the real answer, that Kaden couldn’t remember the last time he ate anything or what he ate.
“Hopefully there’s no permanent damage to your larynx. Your blood work raises questions, there are a few abnormalities, but we’ll check it again later.”
Kaden grabbed the pad and showed the doctor what he’d written.
“No home for you today.”
He pulled back the curtain and left.
His dad came back, took hold of Kaden’s hand and squeezed his fingers.
“The doctor said maybe you can go home tomorrow. I’ll call in the morning.
You need to try harder with your writing.
Something is wrong and I want to know what.
I’ve told the nursing staff Harris is not allowed to see you, that he’s no longer your boyfriend. ”
Kaden nodded. He might not remember telling his dad that, or Harris, but he was glad.
“You swear to me that this had nothing to do with Jalis?”
So it hadn’t been a slip. His dad had meant to say Jalis. Kaden shook his head. Though he didn’t know that it hadn’t.
“Get some sleep, son.” His dad bent and kissed his forehead.
Kaden had never felt so confused in his life. His thoughts skidded uselessly, refusing to line up. He tried to work backwards. When had he last seen Harris?
Then he clapped his hand to his mouth and bit into the side of his finger. Oh fuck. Harris had taken him to Lixian to get material for the day-in-the-life article. And Kaden had… What had he done?
Something… But he didn’t remember what.
~~~
Joe had been wheeled into the ward as Harris walked out, clutching his stomach.
His face was still bruised from where Joe had used Kaden’s fist to hit him.
What was that monster doing here? Kaden lay pale against white sheets, his long lashes dark against his cheeks, a bag of fluid hanging next to his bed. Like the one feeding Joe.