Chapter 24 #2
It exposed what I’d worn for Shawn, the other set of expensive lingerie he’d unknowingly bought for me. When I had first picked it out, I had hoped he’d never get to see it. Now I was pissed he wouldn’t. It added to the fire already raging in my belly.
“God, you’re beautiful.” Juric said it like it was unexpected.
He used his free hand to grab the chain of my handcuffs and pull me close, keeping a tight hold on it.
“Would you like to get dressed?” He dragged the knife lightly down my collarbone, down between my breasts, to below my bra.
“All you have to do is follow my command.”
My heart slammed inside my chest, and it was so loud I wondered if he could hear it. It didn’t matter. I pushed everything I felt to the side except for my anger and leaned forward so my face was by his ear.
“Go to hell.”
Disappointment washed over his face. “You don’t breathe unless I say so. If you disobey, you’ll be punished,” he said. “Now take a breath and hold it.”
I started to laugh, but the sharp side of the blade pressed up against the flesh covering my ribs, quickly making me serious.
“Don’t say no to me. Hold your breath.”
There was no other answer. “No.”
He cut me.
I silenced the scream and maintained an iron grip on my control. I would not give any to him. He looked confused when there was hardly a reaction from me and scrambled to regroup.
“I don’t want to, but I’ll cut you deeper next time. Don’t make me do this. What I’m asking you to do is not hard.”
Was his hand shaking?
He focused intently on me and the ebb and flow of my breathing.
I took a deep breath and then exhaled it in his face, making a show out of my defiance. He stayed true to his word, and this time it hurt too much to not make a sound. When a tiny whimper escaped my lips, he looked stricken. Warm blood dripped down over my waist and the curve of my hip.
“Shit, I might have to stitch that one closed.” The knife was abruptly gone. I was trembling, almost naked before him, bleeding. But I’d done it, I’d won.
Only this round. Not the entire fight, my mind corrected.
Yet there was uncertainty clinging to the edges of his eyes, like he was realizing he might have underestimated me.
But maybe that wasn’t what was going on in his head after all, because the knife was under my bra strap as if ready to cut it off.
The idea of being topless in front of him was scary enough, but more than that, I worried about Shawn’s business card hiding there.
He’d certainly take it from me, and it was all I had.
And there was a chance the Osterh?gen logo might send him over the edge.
“Okay, stop,” I said, quickly.
His voice was stern. “Do as I said.”
I took a deep breath, filled my lungs with as much air as possible . . . and held it.
His gaze was intense and impossible to look away from. My chest was tight and immediately uncomfortable, and I wanted to let the breath out, but he didn’t move. He waited for me to disobey.
He wanted to break me.
It was a lifetime before he spoke. “Good job,” he said. “You can breathe.”
I blew it out, sucking new air into my body. But I hadn’t recovered when he commanded I do it again.
This time was worse. Longer, and it made my head pound from the lack of oxygen. When I was sure I couldn’t hold it any longer—
“Five more seconds,” he said.
The longest five seconds of my life. My eyes watered and pleaded with his. I was dizzy, lightheaded . . .
“Breathe.”
I gasped for air, doubled-over. “I’m gonna pass out.”
“No, you won’t. You’ll be—”
The room went dark.
And abruptly light again. What the hell had just happened?
I lay on the bed now like I’d teleported here. A bandage clung to my side. There was a medical kit beside me, the paper open and a bloody hook with thread. He sat next to me on the bed, pulling off a pair of latex gloves.
“Well, you called it,” he said. “Once you passed out, I gave you something for the pain. You only needed a few stitches, which could have been avoided.”
Since he’d let his guard down, I wanted to make him pay. A leg was closest to me, so I moved fast and latched my teeth as deep and hard as possible into the meat just above his knee.
“Motherfucker!” He yanked me off and hurled me away, sending me face first into the low-hanging stairs.
My cheekbone felt like it had exploded. In my misery, I wanted to sink into the mattress, but I was up and scrambling away as fast as possible to avoid retaliation. He set one hand around the area I’d bitten, and the other hand opened and closed in a fist like that would help dissipate his pain.
“That really hurt.”
If he expected me to cower in fear, he was out of luck. I spat my words back at him with the same intensity. “I warned you.”
I was certain I’d pay for it, but it had been worth it. Surely, I’d broken the skin beneath his pant leg. He gathered the medical kit up, cursing occasionally when he moved his tender knee.
Then he went to the steps and disappeared up them. The bar latched shut, and the emotions I held back finally overtook me. My trembling fingers pulled the card from my bra, beyond relieved it was still there. The paper had softened against my skin, but otherwise it was unscathed.
Me? Not so much.
I stared at the writing, my fingers tracing the raised ink. What was Shawn doing right now? Was he thinking about me and still furious I’d done this? Would I ever see him again?
For the first time since my mother’s death, I truly cried.