chapter thirteen
noah
This is fucked up. I know that. But I can ’ t bring myself to stop.
She feels too good—too damn good—rocking against me, her body molding to mine like she was made for this. Her breath hitches as I tug at the hair at the nape of her neck, angling her mouth to mine. I devour her, lips sliding over hers, teasing, tasting. When I break away, I trail slow kisses along her jaw, down the column of her throat, sucking just enough to earn a soft, shivering moan.
I slip my hands under the hem of her skirt, fingertips skimming over soft, warm skin. Fuck, she ’ s all curves, sinful in this dress, and when I squeeze her ass, she presses closer, grinding down on me. Through the thin fabric, I can feel how tight her nipples have gotten, and I shouldn ’ t—but I love how her body responds to me.
I dip my head, capturing one in my mouth, teasing through the fabric with my teeth. Her sharp inhale sends heat straight to my cock.
“Noah,” she breathes out.
Her hand slides down my chest, trailing all the way to my aching cock. She palms it, squeezing lightly, and I hiss, looking at her.
“ Fuck, princess, ” I groan. “We shouldn’t do this.”
She doesn ’ t stop. Her palm moves, pressing, teasing. Just as I suck in another breath, the sound of tires crunching over gravel shatters our bubble.
Kira gasps, freezing. Her wide eyes snap to mine.
“ Shit,” I mutter, the weight of reality crashing down. “ It ’ s probably Jared.”
Guilt slams into me as she scrambles off my lap, straightening her dress with shaking hands.
“Hello, anybody home?” I hear from the house.
I stand up, moving to sit back across from Kira. I’m still hard, so I readjust myself in the chair. He’s going to know. There’s no way he won’t.
“ We ’re out on the porch,” I call.
Kira straightens her dress, tucking her hair behind her ear. Following the movement, I see a dark spot on her neck. Did I leave a fucking hickey on her? What am I, sixteen? I gesture for her to put her hair back, and she does, a little confused. Jared pulls open the slider, peeking out the door.
“I just wanted to check-in. I’m exhausted, so I’m going to head to bed,” he says. “I’m sorry I couldn’t make it to dinner.”
“It’s okay. I’m glad you had fun,” Kira assures.
“Well, goodnight, guys,” Jared says as he spins around, disappearing into the house.
What the fuck just happened?
“Go upstairs,” I tell her.
For once, she doesn’t argue, rising to her feet and heading inside. That was too close. What if we didn’t hear him? If he wouldn’t have gotten home when he did…Why do I wish he didn’ t?
Easing open the door to her room, I close it behind me and make my way over to her. Kira is sitting on her bed, her feet dangling off the side. She looks up at me with those warm brown eyes, an undercurrent of worry filling them. I move her hair to the side, barely touching the red mark at the curve of her neck. I wince.
“Yeah, good job on that one,” she says, a small laugh escaping her lips.
“Kira, that never should have happened,” I say, my fingers trailing her jaw.
“What, the hickey? Yeah, probably not the best idea.”
“You know what I mean. That can never happen again.”
Her face falls, eyes dropping to the wood floor.
“I should have known better. I mean, fuck, Kira, I’m old enough to be your dad. There is no reason I should be touching you like that. You’re still just a kid, and after what you told me...”
“Noah, I wanted that—needed it, really, and I’m the one that kissed you. I practically forced myself on you,” she says.
My eyes trail down to her lips, my thumb brushing over them. I want to kiss her again, feel her body on mine, but I can’t. Nothing more can happen between us. I’m not what she needs.
“Trust me, you didn’t force anything, but it doesn’t matter. It won’t happen again,” I tell her. “Goodnight, princess.”
Turning around, I step out of her room, shutting the door behind me.
The following day, I don’t see much of Kira, which is probably for the best. I can’t seem to control my actions when it comes to her.
Tonight, she’s somewhere with Jared, so I have the house to myself, which gives me plenty of time to sit with my thoughts. I can’t believe I kissed her last night. Not even twenty minutes after she told me what was likely the most significant trauma of her life, I was pulling her on top of me. What does that say about me?
If Jared hadn’t come home, would I have stopped?
I need a drink.
Grabbing my phone, I dial Keith’s number.
“ Hello? ” he answers.
“Do you have the girls tonight?”
“Nah, they’re with their mom. Why, what’ s up? ”
“Wanna go to Dillinger’s and grab some beers?”
“Meet you there in fifteen,” he chuckles before hanging up.
I throw on a clean T-shirt, grabbing my wallet and keys. I need to get out of this house and get my mind off of her.
I pull up to the pub, seeing Keith’s car already there. I walk inside and see him sitting at the bar, a tall beer in hand.
“Damn, you’re quick,” I say, sitting down beside him.
“What can I say? I missed you,” he says with a chuckle.
“Or maybe you missed the cold beer.”
“The world may never know.”
I flag down the bartender and order a tall kolsch, glancing around the bar as I wait. It’s busy for Thursday night. Nearly all of the tables are full. “Any Way You Want It” by Journey blares through the speakers, barely audible over the shouts and laughter.
A hand taps my shoulder, and I turn to look at Keith.
“I think you’ve got an admirer,” he says, gesturing over my shoulder. I follow his gaze to a brunette across the bar. She looks to be about thirty, and she’s pretty. Keeping her eyes on mine, she saunters up to the bar, an added sway in her hips. She’s wearing a tight red dress that hugs her curves with bright red lips to match. She leans on the bar next to me, a smirk on her face.
“Hey, handsome, you gonna buy me a drink?”
I let out a laugh and look over at her. She’s the kind of woman I should want. She’s beautiful and my age . I don’t want to be rude, so I oblige.
“What would you like?” I ask her.
“I would love a vodka cranberry,” she says, sitting beside me.
“I’ll be right back,” Keith says.
Great, he’s leaving me alone with her. He probably thinks he’s doing me a favor. The bartender hands over her drink, and she brings it to her lips, taking a sip.
“So, what’s your name?”
“Noah, yours?” I ask, but I don’t hear the answer as the door to the bar swings open and Kira steps through it, followed by Jared and his friends. She looks up at me, and our gazes meet. She’s wearing a dress similar to the one she wore the other day, but this one is solid black. It fits her in all the right places. My mind flashes back to her on top of me, my hands up her skirt.
Fuck, I can’t think about that.
Kira ’s eyes shoot to the woman next to me, then to her hand on my thigh. When she looks back up at me, there’s a flash of hurt in her eyes, but it quickly hardens into anger. She drops her gaze, moving to follow the boys to a booth in the corner.
I look back at the woman, and she seems to sense something is up.
“What, did I say something wrong?”
I tell her I’m not in the place for anything more than a conversation, and she takes the hint and returns to her group of friends. Noticing her absence, Keith reappears at my side, plopping beside me.
“What happened? Thought you two were hitting it off.”
“She was nice, but I just wasn’t interested,” I tell him.
He shrugs, looking at me like I’m an idiot. I barely register it. My focus keeps drifting to Kira, but she won ’ t even glance my way.
She ’ s playing pool now, effortlessly sinking shot after shot, beating every one of Jared ’ s friends like it ’ s nothing. The guys are eating it up, laughing, egging her on. She lines up for the final shot, leaning over the table, her back to me.
The hem of her skirt barely covers her ass. She knows it, too—shifting just enough to make it worse.
What the hell is she thinking?
I glance around. Every man in this damn bar can see her. My jaw tightens, and just as I ’ m about to get up and say something, one of Jared ’ s friends beats me to it.
He strides over, leaning in behind her like he belongs there, one hand braced on the table beside hers. His voice is low, murmuring something about lining up the shot, but I don ’ t hear it. All I see is how close he is, his chest nearly flush with her back, his hands too damn familiar.
My fists curl against my thighs.
Keith notices. “ You good?” he mutters.
I ignore him. My chair scrapes against the floor as I push back and stand, striding toward the pool table.
“I doubt she needs your help. She’s fully capable of hitting the ball on her own.”
The kid looks up at me, not recognizing who I am.
“Jeez man, what’s your problem?” he asks, backing away from her.
Glancing down, I see that her hand is shaking under the stick.
“Let her try on her own and show you assholes who’ s boss. ”
Kira, Jared, and I used to come down here and play pool all the time when they were younger. She’s good, and I don’t doubt she will make this shot.
“Go ahead, Kira.”
She focuses in on the cue ball, pulls the stick back, and sends the eight ball right into the corner pocket. She looks up at me, a hand on her hip.
“I could have handled that myself. Go back to your date,” she bites out.
I lower my voice so Jared and his friends don’t hear, “She isn’t my date.”
She ignores me, turning back toward the group.
“Ready to go, Kira?” Jared asks.
Before she can respond, I cut in, “No, I’m going to take her home. She was just telling me how she wasn’t feeling very well.” I look down at her, her eyes shooting daggers at me, but she doesn’t say anything.
“Okay, well, I’ll see you later then?”
She nods at Jared, and the group heads out the door.
“What the fuck, Noah?”
“I don’t trust them, especially after that asshole grabbed you like that.”
She looks up at me. Tilting her head, she moves a step closer.
“What if I wanted him to?”
Yeah, right.
“I know you didn’t. I know what you want, and it’s not him.” Her eyes widen at my statement.
“You have no idea what I want.”
“You sure about that?” I ask, and she eyes me.
On our way out, I stop by Keith and tell him Kira isn’t feeling well, so I’m taking her home. I can tell he knows there’s more to it, but he doesn’t push.
Kira doesn’t speak a word the entire drive. She’s pissed. I couldn’t let her go with them, not with the way that guy was touching her. It was for her safety. At least that’s what I tell myself, ignoring that seeing anyone else’s hands on her makes me want to bring her home and show her who she belongs to. But that’s just it. She isn’t mine, and she never will be.
When we pull into the driveway, she throws the door open before I can park the truck. She climbs out and heads to the front door, but I jump out and am on her heels before she can open it.
“Kira, stop.”
She spins around to face me, and her eyes harden.
“I’m sorry for stopping you from going with Jared, but I did it for your own good.”
She lets out a cynical laugh, “Honestly, Noah, I don’t care about that. I didn’t really want to go anyway.”
“Then why are you stomping off like a toddler?”
“Are you kidding me?” she starts, “You know what, it’ s fine. ”
I reach out and cup her jaw, making her look at me.
“What’s wrong?” She gazes up at me, anger in her eyes.
“Nothing, it’s stupid. It makes sense. She’s someone who you could and should be with.”
What? Fuck, is she jealous? If only she knew that I was staring at her ass in that dress the entire night, not the woman that was sitting next to me.
“That’s what this is about?” I start. “Kira, I told her I wasn’t interested.”
“Why? She was beautiful, your age, and ready to climb you like a tree.”
I let out a sigh, my jaw tightening. She doesn’t get it.
“I don’t want her.”