Chapter 20 Grace
CHAPTER TWENTY
Grace
“When did you start building LEGO?”
Jade’s index finger pokes at the hard plastic petals, shifting the bouquet sitting on my kitchen counter with an inquisitive brow turned squiggly and twisted.
“Just recently,” I tell her innocently. “I thought it would be a fun hobby.”
“They look cute.” Avery juts her chubby fist where her mom’s hand is still curiously examining my new hobby when she adds a little oomph to her touch, knocking a petal off one of the roses. “Oh, no, Avery,” Jade warns. “Let’s be gentle with Auntie Gracie’s flowers.”
I hide the concern in my face with a fond smile while wondering whether or not I kept the instructional manual for the LEGO set.
Luckily, Jade is able to snap the broken piece back on with expertise.
No harm, no foul. But to be safe, I tug the vase closer to tuck it further onto the counter out of reach of probing hands.
I slide the coffee I brewed in my Keurig over to her, scooting the sugar bowl and the Coffee-mate creamer closer to her reach as well. She does the smart thing by handing me Avery while she prepares her coffee, making sure Avery’s active fingers don’t hook over the lip and make a mess.
“So, did you get the list of suitors Mom sent you?” Her question is joined by an enticing bounce in her brow with her focus on stirring in just the right number of sugar scoops.
“How do you know about that?”
“She sent them to me too.” She lifts her mug to her lips, taking a loud sip.
“Why?”
“I think she wants me to help vet them,” she answers with a shrug. “Especially after the last one.”
“I guess she really does feel bad.”
“Honestly, she felt horrible,” Jade admits.
“Really?”
She nods. “She called me every night for a week, asking me if I thought you were mad at her—”
“I wasn’t mad at her.”
“I know. And I told her that, but she was also worried that she might end up shoving the wrong men onto you.”
“I mean, she kind of did.”
“She’s trying not to make the same mistake.”
“Yeah.” I stare down at my own cup of coffee while Avery grows squirmy in my arms. Who knew my love life would be such a hot topic among my family?
I thought I was past all that drama. If not temporarily while I was married, then at least now I’ve grown way past the age of becoming a matchmaking spectacle.
Avery makes grabby hands toward a lone banana sitting on my counter, and Jade reaches for it.
Avery demands to return to her mom, who also happens to be holding her appetizing snack, and I hand her over.
The banana starts to slowly turn into mush in Avery’s hands but at least it keeps her out of reach of the hot coffee.
Or the LEGO. Maybe I need to be more mindful about making my condo more childproof.
“Don’t worry too much about it,” Jade says, consoling my sudden downcast mood while doing the motherly multitasking act of wiping banana remains off Avery’s fingers. “The guilt is obviously going away, or she wouldn’t be sending you all those prospects.”
I chuckle. “Did you see Rick?”
“The guy with the soul patch?”
I cackle a hard belly laugh. “Oh my god, Jade. Why would she think I’d find him attractive?”
“I told her not him,” she adds, her face turning a bright shade of pink with her own breathless laughter. “But she said he’s a dog person, and he would love Buster.”
“Aw,” I croon. “That’s actually really sweet.”
“I know.”
“See? She’s trying,” Jade says, her tone lighter with more genuine reassurance creeping into her rosy cheeks. “And who knows? Maybe she’ll help you find the right man, and you can give Avery here a little cousin to play with.”
I roll my eyes. “Oh, please.”
“What? I thought that’s what you wanted?” She walks over to the small playpen she set up for Avery and plops her in the middle with a rattly toy.
“Yeah, I do. But…”
“But what?”
“I don’t know, Jade,” I say, my defeated, dejected voice sounding like I’m on the edge of giving up. “Maybe I’m just not meant for that life.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Come on. I’m not getting any younger, and I don’t think I should be thinking about having kids at this age or—”
“Grace.” Her interruption cuts into the self-deprecating rant I’ve practically memorized at this point. “There’s nothing wrong with you. You’re going to meet someone and have a family like you’ve always wanted. You’re going to get your happily ever after.”
Andrew said the same words to me. An unexpected protest, proving he’s on my side.
He’s the one standing behind me with a large poster board sign, the words “This woman is perfect” etched in bold block letters.
It’s such a new feeling. Having someone root for me instead of pointing out my flaws, cheering me on in spite of my shortcomings.
To Andrew, I have no shortcomings. I’m just me, and I’m perfect the way I am to him.
“So are you going to give Rick a call?”
My middle finger runs a mindless path along the handle of my mug. Up and down, up and down while I consider Jade’s question. “I don’t know. Maybe?”
“Maybe?”
I shrug, adding a little gusto to my answer. “I…don’t think I need Mom to find my dates for me.”
“Really?” Confusion and curiosity dance on Jade’s face until the moment I can see a thought cross her mind. “Are you finding your own dates?”
Though no words leave my lips, the room rattles with a loud slurp. I look at Jade over the lip of my tipped coffee mug.
“Are you dating someone?”
“No!” My response is like a knee jerk. Like drawing my hand back with a hiss and shaking the sting from the hot end of my curling iron. I mean, it’s absurd. Why would she even ask that? “Why would you ask that?”
“Because you’re acting all mysterious and purposefully vague,” she answers. “You can’t say Mom doesn’t need to find you dates and not explain why. I mean, besides the obvious meddling and helicopter mom behavior.”
I consider all the reasons for my sudden inscrutable confession.
It could possibly be I’ve met my wits end, and the barrage of dating profiles my mom has curated is getting to be too much.
Or maybe—more likely—because the constant text messaging, the back-and-forth banter, between myself and Andrew has led into the same hazy territory as my answer.
I’d forgotten our friendship has been the whole point of it all.
Every text message, every phone call, every shared meal and movie.
It’s become all blurred, leaving me disoriented like I’ve got on a pair of Coke-bottle glasses.
But he can’t be the reason my mom can finally give up her efforts.
He can’t. We’re all wrong for each other.
We want completely different things. His commitment issues and my hunt for monogamy go together as well as oil and water.
Or mixing bleach and ammonia, a somewhat disastrous—and deadly, some might say—combination.
“It’s because of her meddling,” I finally answer Jade. I draw out the nasal “-ing” ending to stamp my point. But it comes out a little whiny, and Jade nods with a frown that isn’t a frown at all but more of a statement. An obviously sarcastic “sure, whatever you say” frown.
“All right,” she says. A lazily thrown white towel as she accepts my answer for what it is: a cover. Good thing she doesn’t know for what. “But if…you know, there was something going on, you’d tell me, right?”
“Of course.” It’s amazing how easily the lie slips from my lips. No, it’s not a lie. It’s a…fib. I’ve taken the lie and stretched it out a little bit. Just until I can mold it back into the truth, whatever that may be.
And I know just the way to do it.
“But you know, maybe as long as you’re there to vet for me, it really can’t hurt.”
“Yeah?”
I nod. “Yeah. Only if you—”
“I will take my job as the official date vetter-er very, very seriously.” She has her palm facing me next to her solemn face with the three middle fingers held up.
“What is that?”
“It’s the Girl Scout symbol of honor and duty. Oh, and sisterhood.”
The straight faces we attempt to hold start to twist into loud snorts and cackles. Our sudden outburst startles Avery in her playpen, and she lets out a tearful wail.
“Oh, Mommy and Auntie Gracie are sorry. We didn’t mean to scare you.”
Jade rushes to an upset Avery’s side, and I’m left with a fresh, new moxie. A hearty determination to clear all the murky, confusing things that make my friendship with Andrew questionable territory. He’s my friend. That’s all. Clear as day. There’s nothing confusing about that.
Maybe I will give Rick a call.