7. Beth
Beth
The morning came too early for me after a day at the beach.
I had a few hours of work at the shop, and, luckily, it was an uneventful day.
I was feeling the sunburn—and seltzers I had—and was looking forward to spending the evening in my comfy clothes with a good book or watching a show with Megan.
Even though she worked all the events in town, for the most part, she had a regular schedule with weekends off—much different from most of the locals in a town that catered to tourists.
As I pulled up in my Jeep, I saw her crouched at the front of the house, working on her makeshift garden out front. She wore a giant sunhat as she waved at me.
“How was work?” Megan asked as I got out and walked toward her.
“Tiring,” I said. “But I’m home. Loving the tomatoes.” I plucked one off the plant.
“I know, I know. Nothing compared to what you’re used to back home, but I like it. It’s a relaxing hobby for me.”
“Yeah, I think it’s great.” I looked up the small row of vegetables, every foot having a different type of plant. “I wouldn’t have guessed you were a gardener though.”
“Little did you know I’m like an onion… many layers.” She giggled, leaning back in to prune.
“You up for a movie night tonight?” I asked. “Figured we could rent something.”
“Actually, that sounds amazing.”
Once inside, I took a quick shower to wash off all the sunscreen and aloe that I’d lubed myself up with this morning and slid into my comfy clothes. I heard Megan in the other room moving about the kitchen, and I took a moment to lay back on the bed.
I groaned as I heard my phone ding, then again when I saw who it was.
Michael: How’s it going down there? Having fun?
Me: All good. How’s it going at home?
Michael: Your mom misses you, but other than that, OK. Your dad seems a bit overwhelmed with you being gone, but he’ll figure it out
Me: I told him he could call if he had questions
Michael: Yeah, but you know Dale…
I liked the message.
Yeah, I did know my dad, and he didn’t want to ask for help if he didn’t need to. I knew it was a pride thing, but I wish he would lay off and let others help. I had told both my parents I’d be available anytime for questions, but he was hard-headed.
Michael: Well, enjoy your time. I’ll be waiting for you
Me: Michael, I don’t need that kind of pressure…
Michael: I know. I know. Just wanted to remind you
Me: I’m serious. You have to let me live my life
Michael: I am. I can still tell you I miss you though. I can’t wait to get back to what we had
My stomach dropped. I didn’t want to deal with Michael or what he envisioned our future looking like, how he wasn’t supportive about the farm changes.
Megan was right. I wasn’t excited about him even though I knew at one point we were good together.
Luckily, I didn’t have to deal with him now.
I told myself I’d figure out what I really wanted with him at the end of the summer, and it was not the end of the summer yet.
I’d enjoyed the white space I’d created in Port St. Clair. I was doing my own thing now. I ran every morning, worked at the shop, took my classes. It felt good just to spend some time at the beach, not caring about anything else.
I sat up, groaning as I felt the burn all over from yesterday. Johnny was right. The aloe had helped a lot. I started rubbing it into my arms again as I walked into the kitchen.
“Wow, you’re fried.” Megan looked me over, quirking her mouth to the side. “I didn’t realize. Does it hurt?”
“Eh, it’s not terrible.” I shrugged. “I’m mostly just tired. I think I’ve over-committed again.”
“Well, a rom-com with the roomie will help for sure!” She grabbed a bag of microwave popcorn and threw it in for three minutes.
“Yeah, I’m looking forward to putting my feet up,” I said, clicking the aloe cap shut.
“I know I’m the one who pushed you into the volunteer thing. Is it too much? I’m sure we can figure it out if you have to step back.”
“Oh, jeez. No. I’m fine. I’m used to it.” I plopped down on the other end of the couch with the glass of rosé she handed me. “I was just thinking it was so nice just to chill out yesterday on the beach. I think I need more of that.”
“Girl, same. I get it.” The microwave dinged, and she poured the buttery popcorn into a giant bowl.
“I mean, look at what I do. I’m basically the gopher at all the town events.
I plan them, I coordinate, and I do all the little things in between.
It’s hard to say no when it’s an unlimited tap, especially when I’m trying to work my way up and prove myself to everyone who’s been here the last twenty years. ”
“Exactly.” I nodded.
“Yesterday was great though. I try to get to the beach a few times a year, even if it’s mostly wading through tourists.” She grabbed her own glass of wine and nestled into the other side of the couch. “You and Johnny looked like you had a good time yesterday. Anything going on yet?”
“Megan.” I tilted my head at her.
“I’d just hate for you to spend the whole summer here, and all you get out of it is working and going to school,” she said. “That’s not what your mom wanted for you when she encouraged you to come here.”
I shrugged.
“Well, I, for one, think she doesn’t want you to work too hard.” Megan beamed.
“Even if that’s the case, I’m sure she didn’t want me having casual sex all summer, especially since she loves Michael.” My chest clenched thinking about him and how all signs pointed to us being together even though it was tough for me to wrap my head around.
Megan clicked on the TV and started scrolling through movies. “Who knows? Maybe she wants you to get some good practice before you settle down with him.” She stuck out her tongue at me.
I wasn’t sure if it was because I was so tired or the mere thought of my mom wanting sex practice for her daughter, but something came over me, and I started laughing so hard that I felt the tears spring out of my eyes and down my cheeks.
A smile plastered to my face, and I knew in that moment that I needed more. I needed more fun in my life.
More joy.
More freedom to live how I wanted.
I just had no idea how to get there.