18. Beth
Beth
As we pulled into the marina, my face flushed with heat from what Johnny and I had just done.
After we cleaned ourselves up, we spent a couple more hours fishing before hitting our limit and coming back to shore.
I couldn’t believe I’d allowed myself to have sex out there when anyone could have driven their boat up next to us.
It’s not like we were in a private cabin of a big boat.
We were on his little fishing boat where we were both fully exposed.
I was embarrassed, and yet it felt right with him.
It felt good. It felt like we’d been doing this for a lot longer than a month, and he was the first man that made me feel confident in not only who I was but also in what I wanted.
There was freedom in that. I craved it, and it made me not only comfortable with him but made me want more of him.
It was completely different than how I felt with Michael, and I couldn’t believe I was missing out on this feeling before.
I shook my head, trying not to overthink things. I needed to think about this as what it was—a summer fling—and focus on safer topics, like the Blueberry Festival.
“I think I’m going to ask Mary about the festival donation when I see her later today.”
Johnny nodded. His face was red from the sun, and he’d flipped his hat around to shield his eyes as he navigated. “I’m sure she’ll say yes,” Johnny said, focused on docking the boat. “Why wouldn’t she?”
“Probably because she’s always said no before.” I ran my hands down my pants, feeling my palms sweat.
“She loves you. You know that. Even if she doesn’t want to, I’m sure it’ll go well.”
I nodded back at Johnny as he parked and racked my brain for what to say.
After we cleaned up the boat, I gave Johnny a quick kiss, thanking him for the boat ride before heading home. I needed to take a shower, eat, and change before I headed into the shop to work my afternoon shift. Plus, I needed to figure out what to say to Mary.
“You missed the rush,” Mary said to me as I walked in. “I had this one kid doing somersaults in the waiting area—probably hyped up on sugar from an ice-cream cone.” She laughed, shaking her head.
“Sorry, I know that can be a lot.”
“Oh, it’s all right.” She took one of the rags and wiped down the mountain bike next to me.
We worked silently side by side for a few minutes as I gathered the courage to bring up the festival to her.
“So, you know how Johnny and I are working together for the Blueberry Festival, right?”
She glanced and me, trying to hide a smirk. “Yeah, I think I know something about that.”
“Well, we have most of the donations we’re expecting at this point, but we’re looking for a couple other bigger donations to make a big pop for the final Starlight Night.”
“Okay…”
“And I was wondering if that might be something you’d be interested in helping with.” I finally looked her in the eye.
“What are you looking for, exactly?”
“We were thinking a sunset cruise tour or something like that.” I took a breath. “I hate asking you while we’re at work, but—”
“No, I get it.” She folded her arms over her chest, letting her dust rag dangle next to her.
“Would that be something you’d be interested in?”
Her mouth quirked down for a beat before going back to the next bike. “You know Beth, every year, I’m asked, and every year, I say no.”
“That’s what I told Johnny—”
She cut me off. “I’m not finished.” She held a palm up. “I’d absolutely donate for you, but I just can’t.”
I furrowed my brow. “What?”
“I would, but I can’t.”
“Okay…”
“I’m selling the business, and I have some people looking into the books, so I can’t donate right now.”
“I know… Wait, what? You’re selling? When?”
“Just got an offer last week.”
I stood up. “Did you have it up for sale? I didn’t realize.”
“I’ve had feelers out for a while now but nothing official. I had someone who’s done some work in other beach towns come to me unsolicited. Sounds like a franchise or something.”
“Wow.”
“I’ve been thinking about it for a while, and it was a bit serendipitous,” she said.
“I know it’s the right thing to do. To sell, be with my girls, be with my grandbabies.
It also feels bittersweet though.” She paused as she held my gaze.
“I always thought if I sold, I’d sell to another family, or someone who’d keep running the shops the way we always have.
Probably wishful thinking though.” She walked out toward the street and looked back at the marina, on the other side of the rental hut. “Unless you’re interested?”
“Me?” My head snapped in her direction.
“I’ve seen how you are in Port St. Clair, how much you love this town and running the shop when I’m not here. I’m sure you’d do great with the other two locations, as well.”
“Mary.” I paused, following her gaze to the marina. “I’m needed back home.”
All my emotions flooded me at once, and I felt glued to the floor. This was it. This could be what I did here—but I couldn’t do that, could I? Just leave the family business behind and start a new life?
“I know. I know. I figured I’d ask.” She walked back to the last of the bikes to clean up. “Just give it some thought is all I ask. Nothing is a done deal with the offer at this point. I know you’d be great at it and carry on what Gordy and I built.”
I watched her continue cleaning as I stood there, letting my stomach sink down.
I wanted to say yes. It felt right. But I wasn’t an impulsive person at all, and this seemed like too much, too soon.
But how could something that seemed so right be so wrong for my family?
I had plans. I couldn’t change them, could I? What would that even look like?
I took a seat at one of the large conference tables that were all facing toward each other in a large square.
I had arrived to class about twenty minutes early, and I was alone as I set my bag on the floor.
The end of summer was coming up, and in about three weeks, I’d have my big presentation the week after the Blueberry Festival.
The week after that, I was moving back home to my real life.
The summer of freedom and doing what I wanted was coming to a close, and the thought left a sour taste in my mouth. I couldn’t believe it was almost over.
Although, at the same time, it was hard not to feel guilty when I knew they were counting on me back at home.
“Beth! You surprised me. I’m usually the first one here,” Professor Mackey said as he entered.
“Hello.” I waved. “Yes, finished up work a bit early and was thinking about some things.”
“About the presentation or something else?” He turned away from me and was prepping his laptop to present.
“Let’s just say I had a business opportunity fall into my lap, and I’m not sure how to handle it.” I paused, watching him unpack. “Some conflicts of interest, I guess.”
“Are you trying to be vague?” He smiled at me, taking a seat. “I’d be happy to give my input, if it’d be helpful.”
“I was offered an opportunity to buy into a business—actually, Mary’s business. And I’m not sure what to do about it.”
“You know? That doesn’t surprise me. She’s been tossing around selling for a few years now. I’m sure she sees you right under her nose and thinks you’d be a perfect fit.” He crossed one leg over the other, leaning back in his chair. “What do you think you’re going to do?”
“Probably nothing.” I shook my head, leaning back and mirroring him.
“And why not?”
“It’s not the right thing to do. I’ve worked with my family for years—basically since I started working. I can’t leave them.” I fiddled with my bag, answering the questions I didn’t know the answers to.
“How do you know that’s the right thing to do?”
“I promised my mom I’d stay and help.”
He tilted his head and crossed his hands. “I don’t know everything that’s transpired, but based on what you’ve shared with me, isn’t that what you’ve done?”
“Yes.” I half nodded. “But I can’t leave.”
“Why wouldn’t you be able to leave?” He quirked an eyebrow at me.
“I just can’t do that.” Could I? I couldn’t.
“Okay. Outside of the family situation, what do you think about the opportunity itself?”
“I’ve done some research.”
“Not surprised about that at all.” He chuckled.
“I haven’t looked into it extensively yet, but based on everything I’ve heard from Mary… it looks like a good option.”
“Well, it sounds like you have to ask yourself about what this could mean for you long term and if it’s worth it.
” He stood up, walking toward the whiteboard and wiping the old marker off.
“I’d have a bunch of questions. Do you expect to work and run the family business forever?
Or just until your parents are no longer able to run it?
Another thing to consider is all the planning you’ve put into the changes you want at the farm—if that’s something you can let go of.
Either way, don’t you think it’s worth bringing up to your parents? ”
He seemed so calm as he asked me the questions. Meanwhile, I was crawling out of my skin. I crossed my arms, listening to him. My mind was going in a hundred directions, and his questioning me didn’t help.
“All I know is you are an incredibly smart and talented woman. Your parents must know this. I’ll just say, if my daughter was offered something like this—something she was excited about—I’d be torn up about it if she didn’t bring it to my attention.
You’re stronger than that. You need to have the conversation—”
Just then, a group of classmates made their way in, cutting him off.
He nodded at me, raising his eyebrows before welcoming the other students in their seats.
Everyone was going back and forth during class, and all I could feel was the dread of having to bring this up to my parents.
Wasn’t I excited about the events business expansion?
Or was that just something that I was clinging to in order to make the farm right for me when really what I needed was something completely different?
In addition to my indecision and stress over talking to my parents, the looming thought of Johnny hanging over me clouded any decision-making I was doing.