22. 22 – Ryder
S peechlessness isn’t something I’m particularly familiar with, but my mouth is dry as I take in the sight of Zella sprawled across Enzo’s fucking torture table .
The breath disappears from my chest as my steps eat up the space between us.
“Zella?” Shoving Enzo aside, I lean over her frantically, checking for signs of impending death and undoing the leather straps holding her in place. She blinks up at me lazily, her cheeks flushed with color.
“Hi, Ryder.”
Her whisper is almost shy, and the panic tightening my chest recedes as I take in the situation that’s entirely different to my first dark thoughts. My eyes drop to where her toes are curled inwards, following the trail of golden skin up to the curls I saw last night.
Except… they’re not there anymore.
Sucking in a breath, I turn to Enzo. He’s leaning against the wall nonchalantly, twirling a knife between his fingers in that irritating way he likes.
“I told you before to stop doing that,” I snap. “You’re gonna lose a finger.”
The smirk he gives me in return is dangerous. “Only idiots chop their own fingers off.”
My eyes slide to Zella in a clear question. “Care to explain?”
Instead of answering, he shrugs and waves the knife at me. “I like to see my food.”
Mother fucker.
Zella scrambles off the table, hastily yanking the edges of my fucking shirt down. “Ryder,” she says breathlessly. “We were just… um…”
Well, this should be good.
“Tell me, princess,” I say shortly. I have an indescribable urge to pinch the bridge of my nose in exasperation, closely followed by a flash of terror that I might actually be morphing into Maverick.
Something’s really fucked up when I’m the responsible person in the room.
Shaking off the shiver, I stalk towards her. She nibbles nervously on her lip, watching me as I approach and lean down, making her meet my eyes as I push her hair back.
“Why,” I murmur, “do I keep seeing you naked?”
Fuck, but her skin is glorious. She can’t hide her emotions from us, not when she doesn’t just wear them on her face but in the way her skin rapidly changes, flushing with color.
“I wasn’t naked!” she says, a touch too indignantly given the picture I seem to have stumbled on. “I still have your shirt on.”
“For now,” Enzo murmurs behind me. Both Zella and I turn to frown at him, and he raises an eyebrow. “Are we not all consenting adults here? I don’t see an issue.”
Spinning back to Zella, I pin her with a look. “Princess. I feel like we’re corrupting you.”
Enzo’s choked laugh rings out, but I ignore him.
This feels important.
“We’re not normal, Zella,” I tell her softly. “None of us. Our lives aren’t like other people’s. You might feel like you’ve stepped into the light, but all you’ve done is take another step closer to the dark. You need to be more careful.”
“Ryder.” Enzo growls behind me, but she needs to understand. First, it was the forest, and now this?
Zero self-preservation. And if I have to play the damn fucking good cop role to make sure she stays safe, then I will.
“You,” I whisper, “are far too good for scoundrels like us.”
The little crease between her eyes gets deeper. “You want me to leave?”
Her voice is flat, the spark in her eyes fading as she looks away. “You don’t want me… like that.”
“That’s not even a question,” I say quietly. “I can’t have you, Zella.”
When you fuck for a living, the job absorbs you, until it covers you entirely. I walk around every day with a film of filth covering my skin that nobody else can see.
I don’t want to sully her with my dirt.
And the longer she spends with us, the more the darkness will touch her.
We all wear our darkness, in one way or another.
“That’s enough,” Enzo snarls. “Go upstairs, little prey. Ryder and I need to have a chat.”
She slides out, avoiding both of us as she quietly gathers up her hair and walks out, her bare footsteps padding out of sight. As soon as she’s disappeared, Enzo is on me with a snarl, yanking me around to face him. “What the fuck is wrong with you?”
I stare at him. “With me? What the fuck is wrong with you ? She’s not for us, Enzo.”
When I try to push him off, he shakes my arm, getting into my face.
“Says who?” His vehemence takes me by surprise. “You think we haven’t earned something a little good in our fucking lives, Ryder? You think we haven’t suffered enough?”
“This isn’t about us,” I snap. “It’s about her.”
He barks a sarcastic laugh. “Like fuck it’s not. You’re letting your own demons get in the way.”
Squaring up to him, I push him. “I have no demons, Enzo. I know exactly who I am. Have you forgotten?”
He points a finger on me. “I never forget. Not for a single fucking second in every fucking day do I forget where I came from.”
I stare at him. “So what? We’re just going to keep her here? She hasn’t seen a single part of the world - you want to keep her here so she doesn’t have the chance to choose something else!”
His skin flushes. “She might choose us. You’re not giving that girl nearly enough fucking credit.”
I bury my palms into my eyes, pushing into the skin. “If she chooses us, then she’s crazy. You had her tied to a fucking table!”
“So?” he shoots back. “She loved every single fucking second of it, Ryder. Your mistake is thinking she’s normal.
She’s not. She’s got her own fucking demons, and if you’re letting her little innocent act fool you, don’t.
She just came all over my hand after I fucked her with the handle of the knife I used to shave her fucking pussy. ”
“You what?”
“And she loved it,” he throws back at me. His eyes gleam. “She’s ours, and I’m taking her. Pull your head out of your ass, Ryder. She was fucking made for us, and I’m not letting her go. I don’t give a flying fuck what you and Maverick have to say about it.”
He shoves past me towards the door. “Or her, come to think of it. None of you get a fucking say in this. Pick her or don’t, but I’ve made my choice. She’s not going anywhere.”
He leaves me to stew on his words in the dungeon. Infuriated, I kick the chair with a roar, watching as it hits the wall with a loud bang.
I finally found something worth doing the right thing for, and now he’s telling me I’m wrong?
Fuck him.