XXVII
Even if Thomas didn't ask the question out loud, Alex could still see it in his unimpressed stare.
?"You wouldn't have to be working double shifts if you hadn't enabled Riley's havoc." Alex said.
?"I haven't seen my family in weeks." Thomas informed him, his expression dead. "My daughter won't even recognise my face."
?Alex remained unmoved. "Right now, you're married to your job. You organised the wedding, so don't get upset with the priest."
?Thomas didn't reply, standing guard at James' door, but the question still remained hovering over their heads.
Red light poured in from the windows, the sun clawing to stay in the sky and drawing blood in the process as the evening marched onwards.
It left the marble corridors in a stark contrast of black shadows and a dark rouge shine; a bird flew past and it cast a large darkened flicker across their faces.
?"He wants to talk to me." Alex answered, at last.
?"This late in the evening?"
?"Apparently so."
?Even if Thomas didn't let the judgement show on his face, it was obvious to Alex. He knew Thomas well enough to fill in the gaps.
?Alex sighed. "Permission to express your opinion is granted."
?"He's a psycho," Thomas murmured, "a charming one at that."
?"It does seem like he grew on you," Alex remarked.
?"That's why I think he's so dangerous." Thomas' gaze held no hint of humour. "He's the kind of man that would stab you and then make you want to laugh it off. It only feels wrong in retrospect."
?"I'm careful."
?"I'm sure you are, Your Lordship," Thomas agreed with a nod.
?There was nothing more to be said, so Alex rapped his knuckles against the door and after a moment of silence the door suddenly swung open.
?"I half-thought you wouldn't show," James laughed, leaning against the doorframe.
?Alex fought to keep his expression neutral, James was shirtless with only a towel sitting over his shoulders, his hair dripping beads of water onto his chest which rolled down the valleys of his muscles. Alex was highly aware he was being watched by both men.
?"I almost didn't," Alex confessed, pushing his way past James so that he could escape Thomas' judgemental stare.
?He heard the door snip to a close behind him and he looked around. The room was surprisingly tidy, like James hadn't spent much time in it, but Alex wasn't sure what else James could do with his time. Alex noticed two empty glasses and a bottle of wine placed on the table that separated the sofas.
?"Did you have a guest?" Alex asked.
?"Nope, that's for us."
?The reply came from right next to him and Alex startled, seeing James hovering so closely. He hadn't heard the man move at all. If James noticed he'd surprised him, he didn't outwardly acknowledge it.
?Uncomfortable and in need of some personal space, Alex went and sat on the sofa, increasing their distance. Thankfully, after tousling it in his hair, James dropped the towel on the bed and put a shirt on. Alex wasn't sure he would have been able to concentrate if James' body remained on display.
?"Have some wine," James said, pointing at the bottle.
?Alex cocked his head. James was becoming increasingly authoritative in his tone, like the palace was influencing him. It didn't annoy Alex so much now that he knew it was because of James' background that he behaved like that. It was possible he'd grown up in a place as equally as grand as this.
?Alex leaned back in the chair, bending his leg so his foot rested on the other knee.
?"I heard you're a royal," Alex said, straight to the point.
?James didn't react to the news but he did glance Alex's way before walking over and flopping down next to him, rather than sitting opposite. His body was tilted so that he could see Alex better.
?"That so? Who told you that?"
?"The duke," Alex replied. "Not in so many words, though. He just talked about you being a replacement for King Fabian."
?James' smile was a mere twitch of the lips. He leaned over and started pouring them both a glass of wine. Alex watched as the water-darkened hair flopped forward with the movement, his neck and biceps tensing.
?"Did he also tell you to try to get some influence over me?" James' tone was one of amusement, despite the words. He held out a full glass for Alex to take and he received it automatically.
?"He did."
?James nodded, taking a sip. "I met your brother. Caelan."
?Alex raised his eyebrows and then took a swig for himself, the sweet and rich aroma relaxing his tense body. Even if he pretended to be lax, he figured James would see through it. "What did you think?"
?"About him?"
?Alex nodded.
?"He's a noble piece of shit." James laughed. "If I told him to suck my dick he probably would have dropped to his knees. I suspected the duke put him up to it."
?"I kind of wished I was there to see it," Alex noted. He'd only ever seen his brother behave like an arrogant snake with a superior attitude. There weren't many people that ranked above them, so the sight would have been refreshing.
?James scanned Alex's face for a moment and Alex let him, curious to what he was looking for.
?"He's not better than you, you know?" James concluded.
?Alex shrugged and took another uncomfortable gulp, the liquid warming his body. "I know that."
?"Why doesn't he?"
?"What?"
?"Why doesn't he know that?" James asked again, leaning towards him. "He seems to think you're a useless waste of space."
?Alex debated what kind of answer to give, he shuffled his body so he was facing James more.
?"I'm not allowed to be better," Alex said. "Never have been. I always lost on purpose."
?"Did the duke tell you to do that?"
?"Why are you so interested?"
?"Because I'm interested in you," James declared. It was something he'd said to Alex before but this time it felt different.
?Alex frowned. He looked between James, who sat closely, mere hairs away from touching him, and the glass of wine in his hand.
?"Are you trying to seduce me?" he asked incredulously, his voice a pitch higher than normal. His heart beat a pace quicker, his body stinging with nervousness.
?James smiled around the edge of the glass that he tried to hide behind.
?Alex shouldn't have been so surprised, he was nervous coming to James' room for this exact reason. However, he wasn't used to dealing with someone who was so direct, so he never thought James would do it so boldly.
?"You know I'm royalty, but do you know who?" James went on to ask, disregarding the previous question.
?Alex wasn't sure if he should let James get away with it or not, but with the state of his nerves, he wasn't in a position to feel ungrateful that the topic changed.
?"No. I just assumed you're a relative of the late King Leonardo because of your colouring. You also seemed to know King Fabian personally."
?James chuckled, the sound did weird things to Alex's panicked heart. "Well, you're surprisingly right. And yes, I did know Fabian. He's probably an entirely different man these days, though."
?Whilst James outwardly seemed normal, Alex noticed the wine in his glass trembled very slightly and James held it with his whole hand more than just his fingers.
Once he noticed that much, he could recognise the hardness around James' eyes and the tenseness of his shoulders.
It was well hidden but Alex had always been good at reading people.
?"You're troubled about something," he mused.
?James didn't seem surprised that Alex noticed, though he did look annoyed that he'd been called out on it.
?"I am," James confirmed, "how do you feel about me being a royal?"
?"You're deflecting," Alex declared with utmost certainty. "You don't care how I feel about your background. What are you so troubled about?" Alex looked around like it may give him hints, he noticed something was missing from the scene around him. "Where's that sword of yours?"
?Alex set down his glass and stood up, walking away from the sofa.
He looked from the bed, to the table, to the floor, but there was no sign of her.
James remained seated, appearing annoyed as he leaned his head against his propped hand, watching every one of Alex's movements like it was offending him.
?"What are you getting so worked up for?" James scoffed, taking a large gulp and then refilling his glass.
?Alex shook his head, tapping a finger against his chin as he tried to remember when he'd seen her last. James hadn't had her at the training grounds earlier that day either.
?"After you were so desperate to get her back..." Alex trailed off, panic rising for a different reason. "What did you do with her?"
?Alex began pacing around the room, opening drawers and checking under the pillows, much to James' displeasure.
?"Will you stop that?"
?Alex ignored him, opening the wooden wardrobe and there she was, hiding behind some hanging clothes. She looked exactly the same as when Ino had given her to him, no bandages, clean and polished.
?"James, why is she in here?"
?Alex hadn't heard James stand up, nor had he heard him walk up to behind him. He only had a second after turning around to panic until James shoved him against the wall, slamming the wardrobe shut without taking Eris out of it. He was angry.
?"I was going to let you off and seduce you instead, but now you've pissed me off." James spoke, his anger controlled, leaning into Alex's space with a glare. "What did Ino say to you?"
?Alex looked down with tightened lips. Ino had told him to keep the information to himself, but he was worried that James was rejecting Eris after he'd noticed his burned hands.
?"I like you, Alex, so you should tell me before I force the information out of you."
?Alex shivered, a jolt of fear striking him, but still kept his mouth shut.
If he told James, there was a possibility he'd never hold her again.
That thought alone was scarier than the possibility of James hurting him to get information, he doubted he counted as one of the 'innocents'. James' opinion of knights was very low.
?He could see James' patience was reaching the edge, so he gave in before he could think about the consequences too deeply. "Ino told me to ask you one question when you held Eris next." Alex said, the words coming out tight. James hadn't leaned away.
?"And what was that?"
?Alex swallowed, his mouth dry. "She told me to ask you to remember the boy you talked about."
?James' brows met in confusion, his lips frowning. "Why that?"
?Alex cleared his throat like he may have been able to cough up his discomfort. James crowding around him in intimidation wasn't a pleasant feeling.
?"She theorised you wouldn't have been able to, or want to try, to remember."
?After a beat passed, James retreated, giving Alex his space back and running a hand through his hair in frustrated thought. "I can remember just as fine as before," James argued.
?"She wanted me to ask whilst you held Eris." Alex repeated, trying to convey the meaning through his words without saying it outright.
?James paused, like he was suddenly understanding what Alex was trying to say to him. "Say it with words," he insisted, dread lacing his tone. "Say it with words or I might misunderstand."
?Alex stepped away from the wall, looking at the ground. If he left the conversation as it was, he only risked the situation getting worse. "Ino thinks Eris has been influencing your mental state, stopping certain memories, certain feelings."
?James' mouth parted open, his eyes wide in shock. He shook his head in denial, but he didn't seem certain of his own refusal. "What's her evidence?"
?Alex paused, uncomfortable. "James, without Eris you were going insane," Alex stated. "You were talking without being present, you were emotional, traumatised. A lot of the time you seemed like you were in a soulless daze."
?"It wasn't that bad." James argued, frowning. "And, I don't get emotional."
?"Yet, you did." Alex contradicted.
?James turned around and went to retrieve his glass, downing the wine and pouring himself another. Alex simply watched on, wishing he'd never come here.
?"So that's why there were burns on my hands," James supposed. Even if James was pretending to be fine, Alex could see the horror hardening his frame.
?"At first, I wasn't sure I agreed with Ino," he confessed. "But, after you got her back, it was like everything had been drained out of you. You were sedated. It makes you a good assassin, but a safer person."
?"Safer because I won't go mad?" James spat.
?Alex didn't refute it; that was exactly what he was saying.
?James must have realised that because he slowly nodded to himself.
?"So, Eris was the one keeping me together. This whole time. That's what you're saying, right?"
?Alex opened his mouth to argue, but then stopped and closed it again. James looked defeated, his shoulders slouching, his head tilted down, his eyes tight. He looked to Alex in desperation, like he might deny it. Alex wasn't sure what he could say to make it better.
?"I thought I was stronger than that." James muttered, venom slicing his words.
?James forewent the glass and picked up the whole bottle itself, leaving for the balcony whilst Alex's feet remained stuck to the floor. By James' reaction, he could tell it was unlikely he'd held Eris any time recently and that thought scared him.
?The sky outside had darkened, only torches and lamps giving them light. The balcony door was left open and Alex was presented with the choice to either follow James or leave him here alone.
?The answer was obvious that Alex should leave.
He'd pissed off a very dangerous man and hidden information from him, he was probably the last person James wanted to see considering he'd walked away.
He should give the man space and rest for the night, it wasn't his business anyway.
He had no idea what James went through as a child which left him so volatile.
?Yet, the balcony door had been left open.
?Alex sighed, staring holes into the ground. He couldn't help but conjure the sight of James looking to him in desperation in his head. It was important that James did not hate Eris for what she did since Ino reckoned she'd only done that to protect him. Yet, James seemed so betrayed by it.
?Alex let his feet guide him before his mind could win the argument, crossing the room to reach the balcony.
?He went and joined James.