24. Kira
KIRA
A noise woke me up, a whirring, clicking noise that was too steady to be a bird on the window or the wind.
I lay there for a moment realizing my entire body hurt and my head was throbbing.
The dull ache in the back of my skull was new, but probably due to dehydration or something.
However, the pain all over my body definitely wasn’t.
Listening for a second, I sucked in a deep breath and felt my chest tighten then relax as I rolled to my side and rubbed my eyes. But in bending my arm, I felt a pinch in my elbow and let my eyes blink open.
An IV protruded from my elbow, taped in place with several strands of medical tape, and an older man with a balding head and glasses perched on his nose sat next to the bed reading a book.
When he saw me stir, he folded the book shut and set it on a nightstand, also situated next to the bed.
But I didn’t recognize the man, or the nightstand, and the walls in this room, wherever I was, were a different color.
I startled, gasping and pushing myself up, but the man pressed his hand to my shoulder with a gentle touch. "Hey… shh, you're okay, sweetheart." He smiled, and his kind eyes narrowed in concern as he said, "I'm Doctor Edwin Keller, and you're safe here."
My eyes darted around the room behind him for a second. It was sunny, so at least midmorning or later, and it definitely wasn't a hospital. I figured I was at someone's home, or safe house, though I didn't know what had happened.
"Do you remember anything?" he asked, not unkindly. His hand went to the stethoscope lying on the bed at my knees which I'd only just seen, and he put the ear pieces into his ears, sliding his hand down the long rubber tube.
"No…" Blinking, I cleared the blurry vision that was assaulting me and rested my head on the pillow with one arm folded under my head.
I draped my other arm down my side and wondered where the hell I was and whether I was with Nikolai or my father.
I didn't assume my father would give me tender care like this.
His doctors were harsh and clinical, not kind or warm in any way.
"There was an explosion at Mr. Dragonov's home and you were struck.
Honey, you have a concussion." He pressed the bell of the stethoscope to my chest and said, "Breathe deep.
" So I did, then I took a few more deep breaths as he smiled.
"You also have a few first degree burns, some smoke inhalation issues, and lots of bruises.
But mostly, you're dehydrated and malnourished.
" Then he scowled at me, but I interrupted him before he could say more.
"I was held captive. I felt depressed and scared and…
" My excuses didn't cause his expression to shift, but having given me Nikolai's name, I figured this was his doctor.
"Is that what this IV is for?" The thing hurt my arm, bending right in the crease of my elbow where it was sensitive, and I had a bruise forming there. How long had I been out?
"Yes, because you were so dehydrated, I barely got that in, and you were bruised in the process. You need that for at least a few more hours until the fluids are in your system. And then," he said, hanging the scope around his neck, "you need to start eating better."
He could take his lectures and shove them where the sun don't shine for all I cared.
A man telling me to keep eating food when the slightest scent of food made me so sick I could throw up was ridiculous.
I avoided eye contact and thought for a second about asking for Nikolai, but then he continued his lecture.
"Did you realize you're more than six weeks pregnant?" His eyebrows rose higher and pinched in the middle as he pursed his lips, but dread flooded me.
"Oh, my God," I grumbled, closing my eyes. "Please don't tell Nikolai." It wasn't news to me at all. I'd already assumed as much because of the nausea and fatigue, but if it got out, who knew what would happen. My mother had made it very clear what my father would do.
"Ms. Markin, your baby needs nourishment. I'm here to advise you medically, not start drama in your life, but—"
Someone cleared their throat and I became acutely aware in a split second that I was not alone with this doctor in the room. His eyes rose, peering at someone behind me, and then I felt a hand on my hip, pulling at me.
"Kira…" I heard, and I recognized Nikolai's voice. It made my cheeks flush hot and my heart kick against my throat as he pulled me until I was lying on my back, staring up at the ceiling.
Nikolai sat on a chair on the opposite side of the bed. Blood speckled his shirt across his chest and stained a swath down his right shoulder and sleeve. He had small cuts on his face, and his skin looked crisp, like he'd spent too long in the sun. But his eyes were kind and sad, not angry.
"Niko, I swear I was going to tell you, but I was scared. And what if my father found out? And how was I going to have your baby knowing—"
"Hey," he said, pressing a finger to my lips. "Shh…" I expected him to be angry and rail on me, or be hurt and lecture or shout. But his touch was so gentle, cupping my cheek, brushing hair off the side of my face. "Doc, give us a sec," he said, never breaking eye contact.
I heard the door open and shut, and I turned on my side, facing my captor, who shifted from the chair to the edge of the mattress. He picked at the hair stuck to the side of my face, by what I could only assume was a patch of dried blood, and he fussed over my IV, straightening the line.
"I'm so sorry you felt unsafe telling me you thought you might be pregnant." His hand wrapped around mine, thumb brushing my knuckles. Then he lifted it to his lips and pressed a kiss to my hand. I winced and pulled back at the pain caused by his whiskers on my sensitive skin, burned by the fire.
"I thought you'd be mad at me, and I know my father would kill me.
" What would've been nothing more than an expression a few weeks ago was now the truth and I knew it.
After speaking with my mother, I had no doubt my father would kill me over this pregnancy because his pride and ego were all he had.
"I'm so sorry I ever gave you that idea." Niko couldn’t stop fidgeting, moving the IV line, fixing my blanket. He looked lost, like he wanted to care for me but didn't know the first thing.
"You're not mad?" I asked, feeling scared that this was just another scheme of his to keep me quiet or subdued. But he laughed a dark, rich sound that resonated inside me and grinned so wide, it touched his eyes.
"Kira, you've made me the happiest man alive. Why would I be angry? I'm going to be a father. I thought that would never happen for me, and now I get to be a dad with the woman I love more than anything." His eyes sparkled and I believed him.
It made tears well up so fast, I didn't know what happened.
Whether it was the trauma or the pregnancy hormones, I'd been so emotional and I'd been holding it all in for so long, it felt like I snapped.
My shoulders heaved with sobs that shook me and Nikolai pulled me up to a seated position, wrapping his arms around me so I had no choice but to let him hold me.
"You love me?" I wailed, burying my face in the crook of his neck, and he hummed a soft sound.
"More than anything… Any man would be a fool to not love you, Kira. You're an incredible woman, and now you're having my heir." When he shifted, pulling back to cup both cheeks hard and look right in my eyes, the tears slowed. "This baby is mine, right? I mean… There wasn't anyone before me."
"Oh, God no," I blurted, shaking my head as much as his firm grip would allow. I grabbed his wrists and closed my eyes. "It's definitely our baby. I just…"
"What?" Nikolai pressed a kiss to my forehead and breathed in a deep breath. It was a bit mortifying. I felt like I reeked of sweat and body odor from having so much anxiety. But he didn't pull away.
"What's going to happen?" I opened my eyes and stared into his dark expression. His eyes narrowed and searched my face.
"Well, I want you to be with me, Kira." When he paused, I felt like there were things he wasn't telling me.
Things that were going to sting when he said them, but I was ready to hear it all now.
Nikolai may have had ulterior motives for forcing me into his sphere of influence, but now that I was here, I was safe. I'd never been safe at home.
"Niko, my father is your enemy—"
"Your father is a bastard and he deserves to rot in hell for what he's done.
" The anger made him pinch my head harder, and I winced.
His hands lowered, capturing one of mine and squeezing tightly.
"He set those charges outside my bedroom, Kira.
Of course there was no way he'd ever know that you were there and not somewhere else in the house, but he did it hoping to kill me. He would've killed you if you hadn't—"
His words stopped abruptly and he didn't have to finish.
So that was what woke me up. They must've made noise setting the bombs up and it woke me, so I got out of bed.
Going to Niko's office and calling my mother was the thing that saved my life.
My father would've killed me in cold blood and never batted an eye.
The thought made more tears leak from my eyes.
"You… You saved me?" My jaw trembled as he wiped a few tears away.
"Yakov and Vlad," he said curtly. "If not for them, we'd both be dead." There was steel in his tone and that used to frighten me, but I knew it was directed at my father, not me. Now it made me feel safer that I knew he would fight for me.
But his fighting for me was fighting against my family—against my father.
I wasn't sure how to feel about that. My father might have been a monster to some people, but I didn't wish him dead.
He was still my father. He'd given me life and he had been there when I was a little girl.
As much as I wanted to hate him for what he'd done and all of his bad choices, I couldn’t hate him.
I cried again, so hard I melted into Nikolai's chest. His arms came around me again, almost smothering me, but he held me through my tears.
When all of this started I had loved my father fiercely and hated this man so much.
But things had changed, and I had seen with my own eyes the evil lengths my father would go to in order to hurt people he hated.
But I'd also seen Nikolai's softer side.
For the rest of my life, I would be stuck in a war between the men I loved, and no one would ever be able to free me from it. And what made it all worse was that my unborn baby would be stuck right along with me.