CHAPTER 27 #2
“Even near death, she was beautiful. She had a babe in her arms. She feared ye would never survive to be a man if it was known ye were Robin’s son, with a claim to the earldom,” Gilbert said.
“Deirdre was a clever lass and had decided that the best way to protect her son from the Gordons was to make them believe you were one of them.”
All this time, Finn was not a Gordon at all. He was hidden among them like a cuckoo hides its egg in another bird’s nest.
“She begged me to raise ye as my son and made me swear not to reveal your true parentage,” Gilbert said. “Once ye were grown, I was to tell ye and let you decide if ye wanted the world to know. She said it was to be your choice.”
Finn had been grown for some time, but there was no point in saying that. If he’d known Gilbert and Isabel were not his parents, at least he would have understood why he never felt he belonged.
“I know I should have done better by ye,” Gilbert said. “But I could see so much of both of them in ye that it pained me to look at ye. Still does.”
“Who else knows the truth about who I am?” Finn asked.
“Mary Sutherland, of course, but that woman knew how to keep a secret,” Gilbert said. “Mary put the word about that Deirdre and the babe both died in the birth. Una served as the midwife.”
“Una?” Finn asked
“Aye, she married into the Murray clan, but she’s a Sutherland by birth,” Gilbert said. “There were others among the Sutherlands who had their suspicions that the babe was sneaked out of Duffus Castle and hidden away, but none of them would guess the babe was hidden with a Gordon.”
“Does Isabel know?” Finn said.
“I told ye she doesn’t,” his father—or rather, Gilbert—said, but Finn was not convinced.
“It would be hard for a man to keep a secret like that from his wife for twenty-seven years,” Finn said. Especially if the man was a drinker and his wife was Isabel. “I wouldn’t blame ye if ye did tell her, but I need to know.”
“Not telling her was the one thing I did right,” Gilbert said. “In her eyes, your claim to the earldom, even if it was a failed cause, would give ye higher status than Bearach.”
Isabel would have made him suffer all the more for that. Finn was grateful Gilbert had kept the secret from her.
“Why tell me now, after all this time?” Finn asked.
“Because ye have a choice now that Bearach is dead and Alex is a prisoner of the Sinclairs,” Gilbert said. “Ye can say nothing of this and be heir to Garty, or ye can claim your place as the Earl of Sutherland.”
Finn pressed the heels of his hands to his temples. This was too much to take in. He did not have a drop of Gordon blood in him. His true father was Robin Sutherland, the legendary rebel who was likely the rightful heir to Sutherland. And that made Finn…
“Nay,” Finn said, shaking his head. “Alex is the earl now.”
“I’ve kept this hidden since Deirdre gave it to me.” Gilbert pulled a silk pouch from inside his shirt and held it out to Finn. “Here is your proof that you’re Robin’s son. It has his seal.”
A surge of emotion clogged Finn’s throat when he upended the bag and held the ring that had belonged to his true father.
“The earldom is yours for the taking,” Gilbert said. “Ye have the better claim, and with Alex captive and too young to lead, the men would follow you.”
Finn knew in his heart this was true. He could take it.
“If you were the earl,” Gilbert said, “Dunrobin Castle and all the wealth of Sutherland would be yours.”
Finn did not care about the wealth or the title or the power for himself. One thought, one truth alone, pounded in his head.
The Earl of Sutherland would be good enough for Lady Margaret Douglas.
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Finn is the rightful heir to the earldom of Sutherland.
Margaret swayed on her feet and nearly dropped the pitcher before easing the door closed.
She had not expected Finn to still be in his father’s chamber when she opened the door quietly in case Gilbert was sleeping.
Finn had told her he was in a hurry, and the two men rarely had more than two words to say to each other.
She should not have stayed to listen to their intimate conversation. But when she heard Gilbert say Finn was the son of Robin Sutherland, she could not tear herself away.
The news could not be worse.
The weight of disappointment crashing down on her made her realize she had harbored the hope that Finn could convince her to stay. But now, even more than before, she had to leave him.
Because she knew from bitter experience about men and their ambitions.
She wanted to believe Finn was different, that he would not be willing to cast aside loyalty, honor, and those he loved.
But if he would fight for a rival clan and kidnap an innocent woman for a chance to own a small bit of land, what would he do to gain the riches and power of an earldom?
The more power men had, the more they wanted—and the more casualties they left behind.
Even if Finn tried to resist, an earl would inexorably be drawn into court intrigues and shifting alliances, the dangerous games of the most powerful men.
She hated that life. If she had wanted it, she would have stayed with her brothers.
Even if she were willing, an earl’s first duty was to sire heirs.
Not having an heir with so much land and power at stake caused wars and chaos over succession.
An earl could even claim it was his duty to set aside a barren wife.
Finn may not know it now, but after fighting to gain an earldom, he would want a son to leave it to.
She leaned her head back against the wall. Somehow, the dream of a quiet and happy home with Finn and Ella and a love that lasted forever had crept into her heart without her knowing it and against her better judgment. If it was not utterly hopeless before, it was now.
She suddenly realized she had been standing outside the door far too long. Before she could gather her wits to run up the stairs, Finn opened the door.
“I was just going to see if your father needs anything,” she managed to say.
“I have to leave Helmsdale for a bit,” he said in a low voice. “I could be away for a few days.”
She wondered if he was already going out to gather Sutherland men to his cause.
“I can’t blame ye for not wanting to be my wife.” He gripped her hand and stared intently into her eyes. “But promise me ye won’t leave while I’m gone.”
“Oh, Finn, it’s not that I don’t—” She cut herself off. The pain in his blue eyes tugged at her heart, but it would not serve either of them to tell him how she felt about him. “I’ll be here when ye return. I promise.”
“We’ll talk then,” he said. “If ye still want to leave me, I’ll see ye safely to the MacKenzies.”
He turned to go down the stairs. She just could not let him go yet.
“Finn!” she cried.
When he turned around, she threw herself into his arms and held him, not knowing if she would ever hold him like this again.
“Be careful,” she said. “I’ll be here waiting for you.”
Before she broke down into tears, she released him and started up the stairs. When she was out of sight, she paused until she heard his footsteps, then she turned back for one last look.
“Goodbye, my love,” she whispered as she watched Finn disappear down the stairs.