14. Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fourteen
By four a.m., Kieran gave up. Sleep was a lost cause. The irony burned in his gut. Just when he’d found the perfect companion to brighten what had been a lonely shell of a life, just when happiness dangled before his eyes like a tantalizing jewel…
After the most soul-quaking sex of his forty-seven years, he held Addy in his arms, sleepy-soft, unguarded, her lashes fanned against her delicate cheekbones. For hours he drank her in, praying her comforting presence would keep the terrors away. Was one night of sweet dreams too much to ask?
Apparently so, because he jolted awake at two a.m. with fire licking his back like a hungry demon and screams of the dying ringing in his ears.
Worst of all, he saw Jack Jefferson’s face pressed against the window of the control house, eyes wide in pain and terror.
And then the glass shattered, and Jack was gone.
Biting his lip so hard he drew blood, he stifled a scream and bolted from the bed.
He mustn’t let Addy see how damaged he was. She had troubles enough of her own—a burden he couldn’t begin to imagine.
And so, here he sat, high atop the lighthouse, clutching a mug of cold tea and watching dawn lift the darkness from the sea.
Steps clanged on the metal stairs below. She’d found his note, then. He steeled himself for the hard talk to come. What an eejit he’d been, thinking he had anything to offer Addy.
Her soft hand gently gripped his shoulder. “Couldn’t sleep?”
He turned to find her expression relaxed and unguarded.
She held a thermos and a mug. “The kettle was cold, so I figured you’d been up for a while.
I made us a fresh pot.” She pulled up a folding chair and sat beside him.
“Though I’ve got to say, your super-strong Irish breakfast tea will take some getting used to. ”
He couldn’t help but smile, despite expecting the worst. “Sorry, love. Believe me, I’d rather be in bed with you than up here.”
She refilled his mug with dark, steaming tea. “I believe you.” She poured her own cuppa, stretched out her legs, and sighed. “New perspective.”
“Pardon?”
She kept her gaze on the horizon as she spoke.
“That’s what Zora said I needed. Time to re-evaluate my life, learn from it, and forge a new path.
” She ducked her chin and gave a sheepish grin.
“Something like that. I wrote it all down in my journal.” She took a sip and winced.
“You ever consider getting a coffee machine?”
“Addy—” He swiveled to face her, elbows on his knees.
“Bad dream again?” she asked, holding his gaze.
He searched her jade eyes but found no trace of bitterness, no judgment, just calm, open curiosity.
“Yeah. You were sleeping so peacefully, and I didn’t want to spoil the moment, so I…” Easier to stare at his boots than see disappointment clouding her eyes. “Surrendered to the inevitable, I suppose.”
“Hey.” She set down her mug and gripped his knee. “Look at me, Kieran.”
He cracked a mirthless grin. “My favorite pastime.”
“We’re both haunted, you and I.” Her eyes glittered, keen and bright in the low, gray light. “I hear mortar fire when a car backfires, screams of the dying when children play. It’s been a long, hard slog back to safety, and the journey’s not over yet.”
“And now, you’re seeing ghosts in my bed.
” He took her hand and squeezed it. “And I can’t sleep without reliving it all.
” He shifted his gaze to the pale, silvery sea.
“I thought I’d put it all behind me, Addy.
But it seems meeting you…” Dread hollowed his chest. This wasn’t going to work between them.
Between his nightmares and her impossible choices, there was no room for love to grow.
“It’s stirred up some powerful feelings.
” She wove her fingers through his, and a tiny flicker of hope winked back to life.
“If we have to sleep apart until the dust settles, so be it.” She lifted his hand to her heart and pressed it there, over the steady thump thump he felt even through her wool sweater and windbreaker.
“I’m not afraid of ghosts, Kieran—not mine, not yours, and not poor Mary. ”
Well, well, perhaps he’d been too quick to expect the worst. His Addy was a strong one, and he’d do well to emulate her.
From far below, a deep woof sounded.
Addy huffed a laugh and rose to her feet. “Snoot’s up.”
“Right.” He drained his cup. “And I need to open up for visitors soon. So—” He stood and pulled her into a tight hug. “Thank you, Addy.”
“For the tea?”
“For not giving up on me when I nearly gave up on myself.”
She took his face in her hands. “I may be slow to decide, Kieran, but I’ve already made one choice. This thing we’ve found together is worth fighting for.”
She pecked his lips, then trotted down the stairs, her footfalls ringing out like a musical scale.
Kieran lingered for a moment, staring out to sea as he conjured the face of his mentor.
“Jack, at your funeral, I promised to pass on the kindness you showed me, but I’ve been too focused on my own hurt to do much good for others.
It’s time to change that, and I’ve found the woman who’ll help me do it—if I can convince her to stick around. ”
“Can I help you find anything in particular?” The fifty-something red-haired knockout flashed a welcoming smile.
Sure, Addy thought, I’d like a big, fat neon sign pointing me in the right direction. And a solution to Kieran’s nightmares. And a pet unicorn, while I’m at it.
“I’m looking for a Halloween costume. For the party at Salty Dog Saloon.”
“Oh, you’re coming to Ryan and Lilo’s party?” She beamed. “New in town? I’m Annie, by the way.”
“I figured as much.” The sign above the door read Annie’s Vintage Treasures , and in her 1950s black and white polka dot frock, its wide collar accented by a sparkly jack-o'-lantern brooch—this woman was a walking advertisement for vintage fashion .
Had Addy ever worn something so deliciously flashy?
“Vintage fashion is my passion.” Annie grinned. “Benefit of being the owner—I get to snap up the best pieces.” She extended her hand. “And you are?”
“Addy Connor. I’m just here for the week, but—” Uh oh, would Kieran want his neighbors to know they were dating? There was so much about him she didn’t know. “Someone invited me to the party, and it sounds like fun.”
“It’ll be an absolute blast. Come, let’s see what we can find.
” She took Addy’s arm and towed her toward the women’s clothing section.
Other antiques shops were dominated by out-of-date furniture and kitschy glassware, but half of this large emporium was taken up by racks of garments from cocktail hats to tuxedos, shoes from 1920s-style spats to 1970s disco platforms, and cases of colorful costume jewelry.
A peacock’s paradise, and so different from Addy’s usual functional, outdoorsy look, it made her want to try something daring.
“Soooo.” Annie rubbed her hands together, her pretty face alight.
“What are you feeling this Halloween? With your dark hair, you’d make a lovely Audrey Hepburn.
” She held up a classic little black dress.
“Or a groovy hippie chick?” She displayed a fringed suede vest. “Or a zombie bride? I’ve got lots of bridal gowns.
” She continued, flipping through the racks until she came to a white lab coat. “Or a sexy doctor?”
Addy laughed. “No thanks. That’s my day job—the doctor part, not the sexy part.”
Annie raised an eyebrow and gave her a quick up and down glance. “Think again, doll. Okay, something wider afield.” She turned to a display of lace curtains. “How about a ghost? We have a local one, the White Widow. Someone always turns up dressed like her.”
There was no way Addy would dress up as that poor, tortured woman. “No thanks.” She pointed to a ruffled red blouse. “This looks promising.”
Annie’s grin widened. “Oh, yes. Excellent. This color is great with your skin tone. Now, where are we going with this? Flamenco dancer? Fortuneteller?”
Addy plucked a black satin skirt from the rack. “Pirate wench?”
“Love it!” Annie crowed. “Let’s accessorize.”
While Annie scurried off, Addy felt a buzz in her pocket. Right, she’d left her phone on silent so as not to wake Kieran—a useless precaution, as it turned out. She fished it out, tapped Accept Call, and her best friend’s smiling face filled the screen.
“Liv! What’s up?”
“Girl, today has been a day . I need a shot of sanity. Show me your beach town.”
“I’m actually in a vintage shop, picking out my Halloween costume.”
“Annie’s place? I love that store!” Liv’s cackle shot a pang of loss through Addy. What was she going to do without her friend’s laughter? Liv had another six years to go before retirement and planned to ride it out with the Army, which meant she’d be transferred somewhere else.
“Ah ah ah,” Liv scolded. “No boo-boo lip, young lady. Quit your pouting and show me something pretty.”
Addy turned the screen around and pivoted slowly.
“Ooo, those cocktail hats! I’ll take the one with the blue feathers.
I’ve gotta get my ass out to Trappers Cove.
It’s been too long. Now, seriously—” Like flipping a switch, Liv dropped her playful tone.
“I bumped into Colonel Okafor. She told me about the accelerated deadline. Are you any closer to a decision?”
“Maybe. I…” She threw a glance over her shoulder and spotted Annie with an armful of colorful cloth.
“Take your time,” Annie called and pointed to a velvet loveseat near the window.
Addy sank down and lowered her voice. “Yes and no.”
“Nope, huh-uhn. None of that wishy-washy bullshit. I need specifics,” Liv demanded.
“Well, I’m closing in on what I don’t want: Nebraska.”
“Duh.” Liv wrinkled her nose. “Your family is a classic case of toxic parents not wanting their children to outshine them.” She scowled and stabbed the screen with her forefinger.
“If you let those shit-stirring fools reel you back in, I’ll have to haul my overworked ass out to the cornfields and drag you home. ”
Addy huffed a laugh. “Yeah, but where is home?”
“Trappers Cove looks good on you. You’ve got a glow, girlfriend. Something you’re not telling me?”
It felt damn good to laugh this hard. Wherever Addy landed, she’d need a friend like Liv in her life.
“Okay, okay—I met a guy.”
“And?” Liv’s eyebrows danced up and down. “Is he keeper material?”
“As close as I’ve come in forever.” She checked to make sure Annie was safely out of hearing range. “But he and I are in the same boat.”
“He’s military?”
“No, but he’s been through something rough. An oil rig fire. Nearly died. Lost a lot of friends.”
Liv gave a low whistle. “So you both have PTSD? Ay ay ay.”
“Terrible idea, right?”
Her friend waggled a hand. “Could be challenging. Could also be helpful—I mean, who’s going to understand your quirks better than someone who’s going through something similar?”
Addy snorted. “Quirks? I freak out at loud noises, and he has night terrors.”
“Right. That might make it hard for a normie to cope, but someone as strong and compassionate as you…”
She was doing that trailing-off-and looking-at-the-ceiling thing she did when she wanted Addy to draw a certain conclusion, and Addy didn’t have time for that.
“But with someone like me…what?”
“It’s a coin toss, darlin’. Depends on the two people involved. I don’t know him, but I know you, and you’ve been hiding your needs behind work and duty for far too long. If you’ve found someone who helps you stop hiding, well…it’s worth a considering.”
Addy blew out a long breath. “Okay. I’ll think on it. And thanks. I miss you.”
“Miss you too, love.” In the background, a loudspeaker blared a staticky announcement. “Shit. Meeting. Gotta go. Mwah!”
Addy blew a kiss and ended the call.
A few minutes later, she left the vintage shop lighter of heart—and wallet—and laden with floppy boots, a red scarf, a wide belt, the blouse and skirt, skull and crossbones earrings, and a shiny plastic sword, plus the blue, feathered cocktail chapeau for Liv.
“Arrgh,” she snarled in her best pirate accent, grinning as she peeked into her shopping bag. “Kieran won’t know what hit him.”