Chapter 23
chapter twenty-three
Denali
The dance James and Kevin do is one I'm familiar with, because we used to visit the same renfaire together every summer.
So it's a shame that I can't teach Kai, not in this dress.
Not that I wouldn't try, under normal circumstances.
Instead, I settle for tapping my toes as I watch them, waiting for Kai to come back with the drinks.
The music shifts, and I feel the hairs on the back of my neck prickle.
Someone's watching me. I know it as certainly as I know my own name.
I could move now, let panic take over, get out of here before the someone can get any closer.
But the way my body refuses to move, I have the sneaking suspicion I know who it is.
Him.
A hand falls on my shoulder, and though I wish with all my being it was Kai, I know by the shape that it's not. My hand rises to cover it, but when the realization of who it belongs to sets in, I stop midway, hand hovering like an idiot.
"Well, Denali Stone, it's been awhile."
Theo.
"Not long enough," I mutter under my breath, hating how I'm paralyzed as he stands behind me, his second hand coming up to join the first. "Didn't you just stalk me on an open street the other day?"
His voice reveals the grin he's wearing, and I just know it's malicious. "Ah, yes, outside of the dance studio. Tell me, Denali—how did you manage to get around my blacklisting to find a job in the industry? I thought I made sure nobody would ever hire you."
Even after all this time, I feel compelled to answer truthfully.
The fingers on each of his hands dig into my skin, and if I'm not careful, if I don't get them off of me soon, they'll leave bruises, if they haven't already.
"Let me go, Theo, you're hurting me." I try to shake my shoulders, but he's not letting up.
In fact, upon hearing that he's causing me pain, he doubles down, his grip tightening. "What do you want?"
I shiver at the hot breath that fans out against my skin as he leans over me and whispers against my ear. It's not arousing like Kai's is when he does the same. It makes me want to vomit.
"Well, you see, Denali, I made you a promise.
And it's one I intend to keep." His left hand drags down the side of my exposed arm, slowly, carefully, teasing the skin and causing my body to break out in a cold sweat wherever he touches.
"I wish I had time to linger and tell you all about what I have planned for you, but it looks like the man you're currently fucking to get to the top is on his way back.
" His lips graze the shell of my ear, and I wince so hard it pulls something in my back.
"Mmmm. You still wear the same perfume that you used to wear back when you worked for me. Some things never change."
I vow then and there to swap perfumes and never touch another floral scent in my life. "I've changed," I say, but it's a lie. I'm still the same old Denali he used to push around, the same woman he can turn into a frightened rabbit in a room full of onlookers.
"You, dear, have not and will not change. It's not in you to become something you're not."
I cast my gaze out of the corner of my eye, at the bar on the far side of the room, hoping Kai's looking this way, that he sees I need help.
But it's no use. He's handing over payment to the girl at the counter and accepting our drinks from her as I stand here and panic, and suffer, and pray for reinforcements that aren't coming.
"Awww, still looking for a man to come save you, huh, Dee? I told you—you don't have it in you to change."
I want so badly to prove him wrong, but I can't. My feet won't move, and I can't bring my hands up to fight him off. I just stand there like a statue, wishing I was stronger. That I could overcome this fear he's instilled in me, to do something, anything, really.
But I can't.
I'm not waiting for a man to come save me. There's no saving me at this point. If Theo Swanson decides he wants something, there's no way to change his mind. I know from experience.
I just hoped he'd move on by now. Clearly that was wishful thinking.
"What do you want, Theo?" I'm kind of proud of how confident and strong my voice sounds, even if I don't feel that confident and strong.
"Isn't it obvious? I want you." His fingers brush the sides of my throat, leaving a mental stain I can feel in my skin. "And when have I ever not gotten what I want?"
He pulls back, and for the first time since he stepped up behind me, I turn my head to look at him, really look at him. And it's like he disappears before my eyes. One minute, he's there, staring at me, backing into the crowd with a little wave, and then he's just . . . gone.
I'm not sure what's worse—the fact that he approached me when he knew I was alone, or that he's able to disappear like he was never here to begin with so easily.
His threat lingers in the air long after he's gone.
When have I ever not gotten what I want?
He's right, technically. In all the time I worked for him, never once did anyone ever deny him a thing.
But this time? This woman? Me? I don't plan to give him what he wants.
I don't plan to surrender to him. Especially not after taking his punishment on the chin and suffering for as long as I have to get by still.
He can keep dreaming if he thinks I'll cave just because he wants me to now.
I paste a smile on my face and cross my arms, watching the couples that work their way back out on the dance floor, one by one.
Kai should be back any minute with our drinks.
I'll down mine, and then make the rounds with him like I promised.
I can do that, at least, without falling apart where everyone can see.
The breakdown, the fallout, can wait until I'm in the safety of my own home and behind a door I can lock and put between me and the crazy man stalking me, making my every moment a living nightmare.
But we still have so many people to work through that I worry it'll take all night to say hello to everyone. And then goodbye.
Fuck.
"When you said you knew a place, I didn't think it'd be this."
Two hours after the run-in with Theo, we got in the car and went in search of some food.
I'm still riding the high of the event, but most of the nervous energy I've excused as excitement and joy is just anxiety and stress.
It's a buildup of everything from tonight, and I'm just not sure how much more I can take.
Kai leans back on the park bench across from his apartment complex, a wicked grin on his lips as he licks the sauce from his fingertips.
"Well, normally I'd take you to some fancy high-end spot, in a dress like that, but I felt like tonight's been filled with enough bullshit and fancy dress-up.
I wanted to enjoy a meal with you, not feel pressured to be someone we're not.
" It's a miracle he hasn't gotten anything on his all-white outfit. "How are your fried dumplings?"
I smile over at him and nod, taking another one off the end of the stick they're strung up on for convenience and ease. "Delicious."
"Perfect." His lips curl around a corndog, and I have to bite back a laugh at how normal he seems right now. White suit nonwithstanding, of course.
Here we are, sitting out here in what has to be thousands of dollars worth of high-end duds, a bodyguard by the car, another in it, and we're eating street food from a fucking food truck vendor in a park.
File that under Places I Never Thought I'd Be In My Life.
The park is quiet this time of night, and we eat in mostly companionable silence, until there's no food left, and the last straggler has left the park for the night. And then, it's just us, and the atmosphere changes.
"I had fun the other day, getting wasted with you at three in the morning." Kai turns to me finally, a hint of smile and hope in his gorgeous eyes. "Wanna do it again?"
If I go to his house right now, tonight, while the memory of Theo's little interlude is fresh in my mind, I'll—
No.
I'm feeling far too weak and vulnerable to trust myself with booze and him.
I might slip up and say something I can't afford to say.
Like I think I'm in love with you but there's a crazy man stalking me and making threats and I don't want to see you get hurt, or I want your arms around me so bad it's eating me up inside, please hold me.
"Not tonight," I say instead of denying him outright, frowning like I'm upset that I have to decline the invite. "Rain check?"
"I've heard that phrase before, but what's it mean?" He's so close I can feel his body heat, and that in and of itself addles what little bit of my mind isn't currently fractured.
I shake said head to clear it so I can process some logical thought and string together a sentence, even as Kai's thigh brushes against mine. "It means I'm asking you to put the invitation on the table for another night. Tonight was just . . . a lot."
His arm slides around my shoulder, and it's so comforting I want to cry. "Sure thing, we can table it for now." He looks up at the night sky, where the stars have started to appear despite the city's insanely bright skyline. "Thanks, by the way, for coming with me tonight."
I look down at my lap, blushing. "I enjoyed myself. Thanks for inviting me." I mostly enjoyed myself, and I can't let Theo overshadow the fun I had with Kai. I won't.
"More like forced you," he says with a smile and a little laugh, so very at odds with the usual stoic workaholic that I'm used to. "But either way, I'm happy it was you on my arm instead of someone else."
I don't want to read too much into that, so I just nod and pretend I'm not secretly looking for another meaning to his words. A meaning that could very well lose me my job.
We sit there for a few more minutes before he clears his throat and takes my hand, leading me back to the car. We sit side by side in silence the whole way to my house, and when I go to get out, he's quicker than a flash, leaning over me to open the door before I can do it myself.
"You're off tomorrow," he starts, but I know where this is going, and it's not a good idea for me to let him continue. If I do, my resolve will crumble, and while he wants to drink as friends, I don't think I'll be able to keep things professional if we keep hanging out on the down-low.
"I have some errands to run, housework to catch up on, and I've gotta prune my plants." I glance up at my apartment window, where Taco usually waits for me, but the windowsill is unusually empty. "Taco must be mad that I've been spending so much time away from home. He's not even waiting for me."
"Maybe he's just sleeping," Kai offers, but I smile softly and slip from the car.
"Thank you for tonight," I say softly, and then I pick up my skirts and start the slow climb to the apartment.
The hallway on the first floor to the stairwell is darker than usual, but there's always a burnt out bulb somewhere in need of being replaced. And my landlord nowhere in sight to fix or replace it. This is nothing new.
What is new, however, is the cat sitting outside my apartment door when I reach my floor.
"Awww," I coo as I get closer, hoping not to spook the poor thing, "what apartment did you slip out of?" When I get close enough to see his distinctive markings, though, a chill runs through me. "Taco?"
Why is Taco not inside my apartment?
His meow tells me he's not hurt, nor has he been out here long, because I just left earlier today, and he was securely inside the damn place. I have no idea how he got out, but I'll worry about that later. I scoop him up and put my key in the door—
Or I try to. When it touches the lock, the damn thing creaks open, like the fucking climactic moment in some B-list horror movie from the nineties, and suddenly I'm firing on all cylinders.
I never leave my door unlocked when I leave. Taco shouldn't be outside, just like this door shouldn't be open already.
Words fail me, and I'm not sure what I'd say to the emptiness of my apartment, anyhow. I step inside, set Taco on the counter, uncaring that he's not supposed to be up there, for now, and flip on the lights.
A scream climbs up my throat, jams itself there. Thank god, too, because the last thing I need is the building super to come up here and make a scene.
I already have one to contend with.
My apartment's been tossed. Someone was in here and ripped it to shreds, every inch, like they were looking for something.
The couch is upended, the dishes ripped out of the cabinets and shattered on the floor.
The coffee machine sits on its side, crushed.
Half of my plants are tossed around the room like someone hurled them at a wall in a fury.
There's dirt everywhere. From somewhere behind me, Taco meows, but I'm not paying any attention to him right now.
I inch down the hall, careful not to disturb the dirt, and shove open my bedroom door.
In the center of the bed is a bouquet of those same fucking flowers that Theo's been leaving me at work, those flowers he thinks I like, or maybe he knows I hate them, I'm not sure.
They sit there in a heart shape, though below it, the words written in red lipstick on my white duvet send a much more sinister message.
You're mine. You'll always be mine. And I always get what I want.
I'm so messed up about it, I don't even notice I'm no longer alone until a hand comes down on my shoulder, and that scream rips free of my throat as I turn around and swing on whoever it is with all the strength in my body.
"Kara, wait!"
Kai.