Chapter Nineteen
“How can they be out of coffee on the first day? I’m going to absolutely die.
” Jessica held up her thermal mug and groaned.
It was the following morning and Dani was struggling to stay upright at the cafeteria drink station.
She and Jessica always met there before work to fuel up on coffee and gossip.
“I’m going to pay to get some delivered then,” Dani yawned. “I won’t make it past my first class if I don’t get some caffeine.”
“Yeah, no offense but you look awful.” Jessica begrudgingly poured a cup of hot tea instead. “Are you feeling sick?”
“No. I got some bad news over the weekend and it was hard for me to get to sleep.”
“Oh. Well, I have some good news that you might be interested in.”
Dani resisted the urge to roll her eyes. Jessica was the kind of superficial work friend who didn’t pry or ask too many questions about her personal life. She loved gossip, but also kept Dani at arms length. Just the kind of friend she needed. “What?”
“Apparently Ethan was very talkative at the work thing Friday night,” she said. “Your name was brought up quite a few times.”
“Ugh.”
“Don’t be like that,” Jessica said. “He’s a nice guy! I’m just saying, I think you should give him a chance. You know I heard that …”
Her co-worker’s words were muted as a familiar aroma burned her nostrils.
It was a smell she knew far too well. The smell of Him.
She gasped as a big-boned, bleach blond student pushed past her in line, all shoulders and testosterone and cologne-scented bravado.
His elbow banged into her shoulder as he walked by, continuing on his bulldozing path without even bothering to acknowledge the collision.
“Hey!” She shouted at his back. “Excuse you!”
“Sorry.” The student shrugged and grabbed a lunch tray.
If she were in a cartoon, steam would have burst forth from her ears.
Dani stared at the students’ back, fantasizing that he really was Matt Vickers.
How easy it would have been to pick up the empty glass coffee carafe, its base boiling hot from the plate.
How easy it would be to smash it across the back of his dumb, bleached blond head. How easy …
“Hey! Dani!” Jessica snapped her fingers two inches in front of her nose. “What is up with you today?”
“Huh?” Dani shook her head, rage still boiling between her ears. “Sorry. I’m just tired, I guess.”
“I gotta go,” Jessica said. “Meet up for lunch?”
“Can’t. I need to take care of some things.” She grabbed her bag, forgetting all about her need for coffee. “Rain check.”
“Okay,” Jessica said. “Bye?”
“See ya.” Dani left her confused coworker as she fast-walked away from the cafeteria drink station.
She threw one last scornful glance at the kid who had shoulder-checked her as he filled up his tray with hash browns and scrambled eggs at the breakfast bar.
Guys like him and Vickers would get away with bad behavior and worse until the end of time if no one called them out.
Even though time had passed, and new trends and social attitudes prevailed since she was a teenager, this new generation of teenagers was still very much the same as the last. Jocks, bullies, mean girls, nerds—there were stereotypes for a reason.
Dani learned that for most people, the persona they took on as teens followed them to adulthood, only in more subtle ways.
She admittedly judged any and all young men who looked and acted like Vickers.
It wasn’t the goth kids dressed all in black or intellectual loners who were the real-life villains, but clean-cut alpha types who thought the world belonged to them.
It was after 10 a.m. when Dani finally got a text from her Aunt Lisa.
She was able to breathe a sigh of relief knowing that her aunt had arrived at the cabin.
The one person in the world who really mattered to her was safe—for now anyway.
Dani felt bad about blowing Jessica off for lunch, but the truth was, she just wanted to have a few moments of peace to herself before her next class began.
The weekend had left her physically and emotionally exhausted, and all she wanted was to shut her eyes for a few moments before facing her next class.
The commute home was too far, but she could catch a nap in her office at least.
Her office was small, only big enough for a desk and a couch and, as per her safety standards, free of any possible hiding spaces.
With the lights off, her little private space was cool, dark and tomb-like, just the way she preferred it.
She closed her office door, turned the lock and walked to the picture window overlooking the courtyard.
Dani pulled a half-smile, half-frown as she stared down at the students in the courtyard below, remembering her own bittersweet first days at university.
Her college memories were supposed to be full of fun and exciting things.
Instead, all she remembered was loneliness and misery.
As she scanned the crowd of youthful faces, Dani found herself wishing that Matt really was among them.
He was out there, waiting to make his move, she was certain of it.
The idea of him watching and waiting for her used to stop her in her tracks.
For so long, the overriding emotion in her heart had been fear, and her emotional state prevented her from truly living a full and happy life.
Dani wasn’t going to accept fear and anxiety overruling her life anymore.
Perhaps the shift in her mindset was due to the onset of perimenopause or the reality that her attacker was probably nearby.
Either way, Dani was all out of fucks to give.
If she had to ruin her reputation and everything she built to get to him, so be it.
She wanted him dead, and the sooner she could take him down, the better.
She glanced toward the edge of the treeline, searching for his shadow, as she always did.
“Come on, fucker,” she whispered. “Come get me.”
Dani’s tired eyes ached against the early morning light.
She closed the blinds and resigned herself to a nap.
She didn’t expect to have any visitors since it was the first day of school; the only time that students usually knocked on her door was when an assignment was due.
She eased into her couch, flipped off her flats and threw her arm over her eyes to block out the rest of the light.
Before she could worry about Matt Vickers or her students or anything else, her breathing slowed, her body relaxed and she allowed herself to slip into darkness.