Chapter 7 #2
“Please,” she whimpered, her breathing ragged and broken. “Please, Alex.”
She had no idea what she was pleading for. Only that there was an ache inside her that was growing by the second.
“I know, sweetheart,” he whispered. “I know.”
She felt the sudden loss of his hands keenly but before she could issue a protest, they were back. He’d taken the time to remove his gloves and the feel of his skin against her own was divine as he cupped her neck, positioning her head so he could once more plunder her mouth.
Olivia was a puppet in his hands. She could do nothing but press herself wantonly against the rigid length of him, rejoicing in his growl of approval, in the surge of his hips against her own.
The ache inside her was building to fever pitch and she wasn’t sure how to soothe it. She didn’t think anyone could. Anyone but Alexander.
Before she could once again beg for something beyond her reach, she felt his hand reach under the bunched material of her gown.
They gasped in unison as his fingers met the smooth skin of her thigh, bare above her stockings.
Olivia wondered briefly if she should be scared or nervous or even horrified by the feel of his hand moving further up her leg, closer to her centre. But she only felt excited, intoxicated, enthralled by the pleasure he drew from her.
His lips moved from her mouth to her ear, his teeth pulling on the lobe before moving once again, down her throat, pausing at her hammering pulse, before travelling lower still.
The hand that had been cupping her nape moved suddenly to delve inside her gown and the feel of his flesh against her aching breast caused Olivia to cry out in bliss.
All the while his other hand was on the move.
It became too much for Olivia to stand, the pleasure bordering on pain.
He was a maestro, drawing the most beautiful music from her body.
She wanted to pull away. She wanted to press closer. She wanted it to end before she expired, and she never wanted it to stop.
Something inside her was twisting, tighter and tighter. His fingers stroked her once, twice, before one pushed inside her while his thumb pressed against her, and his mouth replaced the burning heat of his hand on her breast.
The twisting ball of desire inside of her exploded, shattering into a million pieces.
The power of it was blinding and Olivia became a slave to the feeling, her hips rocking against his hand, her head thrown back in wanton abandonment.
And through it all Alexander stayed with her, anchoring her, drawing every drop of heaven from her body, the creator of her torment, and the master of her pleasure.
Slowly, Olivia drifted back to earth.
It was all she could do to drop her head forward and rest it against his rock solid chest while she tried to catch her breath.
Alexander’s arms came around her and he buried his face in her hair, dropping a tender kiss atop her head.
“Alex, I –“
Suddenly the carriage rattled, and Olivia let out a shriek of fright.
“Only me, my lord. The hour is up.”
Alex let out a strangled laugh while Olivia buried her face in his shoulder, embarrassment warring with happiness inside her.
“I need to get you home,” Alexander said softly, his arms still holding her close.
Olivia knew there’d be no ladylike way to extract herself from his grip, so she was happy to stay right where she was, nestled against him as he rapped on the ceiling and the carriage took off at a slow trundle.
Tomorrow she might regret every second of this interlude.
But tonight, she would just enjoy being so intimate with the man she loved.
Sleep eluded Olivia as she had known it would. She’d darted into the house, avoiding Sterling’s frown of disapproval and Ellie’s blatant curiosity. When she’d enquired after Jane, she’d been informed that her sister hadn’t yet returned home.
So then she added a gnawing worry for Jane to the ever-growing pile of emotions crashing through her.
She couldn’t believe what she had just done with Alexander. More than that, she couldn’t believe how little she regretted her actions.
Shouldn’t she be flagellating herself? Taking herself off to a convent or some such thing?
But instead of shame or mortification, she felt only happiness, only love.
All this time she’d worried about Jane’s attraction to ruinous behaviour when she should have been worrying about her own.
Still, she could trust Alexander…couldn’t she?
As Olivia readied herself for bed, wondering if she should tell Mama that Jane wasn’t home, she heard the distinctive sounds of movement in Jane’s bedchamber and heaved a sigh of relief.
She had no idea what had happened with Jane and Mr. St. Clare, but she couldn’t question her sister right now. She needed to be alone to process what she’d done tonight.
That night as she tossed and turned, she started to regret her actions with Alexander.
She’d been so caught up in her desires that she’d convinced herself he was trustworthy. That he was enamoured of her as she was infatuated by him. But she’d made that mistake before and been humiliated for it.
Despite her best efforts, her mind would not be silenced, and the memories of that day would not be supressed.
After Alexander had almost kissed her, Olivia had been desperate to seek her sister’s council.
Being unable to find Jane in her bedchamber, she had searched the house and had finally moved toward the voices she heard coming from the library.
It was only as she reached the partially opened doors that she realized one of the voices was male. Was, in fact, Alexander.
She shouldn’t have really, but she settled in to eavesdrop.
After all, she was full sure that Alexander had been about to confess tender feelings for her in the garden.
She knew Lady Fincham was here to visit with mama.
Alexander was bound to be telling his mother about it, perhaps even seeking her advice on how to proceed with a courtship.
What she heard, however, was decidedly not what she had wanted.
“You’re going to pursue the Darington girl then?”
“What?” To Olivia’s surprise, Alex had sounded horrified.
“Mavis saw you in the gardens, Alexander. Really, you should be more discreet. And I’m not altogether thrilled about the match either. She’s a pretty thing and Lady Cynthia is a dear friend. But you are to be an earl. You can do much better than a baron’s daughter.”
The silence stretched so long that Olivia thought perhaps he meant to ignore his mother’s insults altogether.
Finally, he answered, “You should tell your companion to have her spectacles checked, Mother, there is nothing going on between me and Olivia Darington.”
“Do you care for her?”
“Of course not. It was a joke. We’re always playing tormenting each other, are we not?”
Olivia’s face burned with humiliation.
“I do wish you’d stop with that immature nonsense, Alexander. But I’m glad to hear there won’t be any sort of betrothal in the works. Perhaps you should keep your distance from the gel. Wouldn’t want her getting any ideas, after all.”
As her stomach churned with remembered humiliation, Olivia came back to the present with a terrible thud.
What was the point in all of this? She had barely gotten over her embarrassment then. Now, with her heart involved, she refused to take the risk.
Alexander watched Olivia’s face as a myriad of emotions flitted across it. He was throwing another party, this time a smaller dinner, just so he could see her again. He watched in amusement as she stifled a yawn. She’d never been able to hide her feelings, even when they were children.
It was one of the things he loved the most about her.
His thoughts came to a screeching halt as the word burst through his mind, like fireworks across a darkened sky.
He did. He loved her, the annoying, sneaky, beautiful, stubborn little hell-cat.
He couldn’t stop his sudden grin.
It seemed so obvious to him now.
He loved her.
They would marry and fill a nursery and she would be his countess and share his life with him.
Her quick mind would be invaluable in the running of his affairs, and her sharp wit and sharper tongue would be a constant source of entertainment.
And then of course, there would be the opportunity to hold her and kiss her and make love to her every second of every day.
It would be bliss.
Alexander was about to snatch her from the clutches of his painfully boring solicitor to tell her all of this when she looked up at him and her expression changed once more.
She didn’t look pleased to see him, or happy to be there. In fact, she looked miserable.
A feeling of trepidation dropped into his stomach and without acknowledging any of the nods or greetings sent his way, he cut through the room until he was at her side.
“Olivia—”
“Excuse me, my lord. Mr. Smith,” dropping a quick curtesy to them both, she shook her head and moved towards the door.
He frowned in confusion.
What the hell was going on?
Alexander hesitated only moments before following her out of the room.
He found her once more in the conservatory.
“I heard you, you know,” she spoke as though they’d been in the middle of a conversation. He could see the blush staining her cheeks, even in the moonlight. “All those years ago after we’d — well, after.”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” he said carefully, not really knowing what her mood was or where this conversation was headed.
“No, I expect you wouldn’t. The whole thing was rather boring and insignificant for you, I’d warrant. But it bothered me, I’ll admit. And I haven’t forgotten it.”
Without saying another word, she turned and made to leave the room.
Alexander felt his temper flare, though he knew it was panic that was causing it.
Just like that, she was ruining all his hastily made plans. She couldn’t just stomp off without explaining why.
“Would you care to expand, Olivia?” he called, rushing after her. “For I am at rather a loss as to what you are going on about.”
“After our encounter in the garden that day, you were at such pains to laugh about me to your mother. To tell her about your decided lack of interest in me. To assure her that you would never be interested in me.”
Damn.
“Olivia, we were young. We were enemies. You cannot think that things are the same now. After last night?”
“I can and I do. I can only hope that I can save Jane from making the same mistakes I did. I couldn’t keep myself safe from a rake, but I can perhaps save her.”
Alexander couldn’t believe what he was hearing. The pain of hearing what she really thought of him was excruciating.
Was she really going to hold the sins of his past against him? He hadn’t even meant what he’d said. He’d just had no idea how to deal with the visceral reaction he’d felt when touching her.
“Olivia, I didn’t mean it. I was trying to save face. You have to understand.”
“Oh, I do understand Alexander. I understand that last night should never have happened. I understand that if I wasn’t good enough for you back then, I certainly shan’t be now. Penniless and ruined.”
“Can we please talk about this?” he asked desperately.
She sighed and looked suddenly weary.
“I’m tired and I have a headache. I’m going to find Jane and we can forget all of this ever happened. If you would be so good as to keep an eye on your friend, I’d appreciate it.”
He watched as she walked away.
She couldn’t leave it like this.
But she was leaving all the same.