24. Ayana
CHAPTER 24
Ayana
I ’d admit it—I chickened out.
I didn’t tell Sloane, Jordan, or my agency about Wentworth. I’d had every intention of doing so, especially when I was convinced he’d turn around and try to paint me as the bad guy, but a week after the incident, he vanished into thin air.
He’d canceled all his bookings, leaving a swarm of angry editors and brands in his wake. He didn’t provide details, and he didn’t give people a way to contact him after he disconnected his phone and deleted his email account.
It’d been two weeks since the Sage Studios photoshoot, and no one knew where he was. Even if he tried to make a comeback, he’d pissed off so many powerful people who now had to scramble and find a new photographer at the last minute that his standing in the fashion world would never be the same.
Neither Hank nor Emmanuelle mentioned what happened at the shoot. Either they didn’t know, or they didn’t care. Both were plausible.
Whatever the case might’ve been, Wentworth’s disappearance rendered my initial plan moot. I’d already vented my feelings in the rage room, and I didn’t want to rehash the events with anyone else besides Vuk. It was too emotionally draining.
I had my suspicions about what—or rather who —caused Wentworth to vanish, but at the end of the day, it didn’t matter. I just wanted to put the incident behind me.
Luckily, I had plenty to distract me, including my upcoming wedding in three weeks and tonight’s gala at the Valhalla Club. I wasn’t a member, but Jordan was.
“Are you okay if I dip out for a minute?” he asked after we entered the ballroom. “I need to talk to Dante about something.”
“Go ahead. I’ll be fine.” I waved a hand around the lavish room. “I have plenty to keep me entertained.”
The gala was ocean-themed, and the organizers had somehow installed life-size aquariums on both ends of the room. There were free-flowing drinks, a live orchestra, acrobatic performers, and a fifteen-foot-tall ice sculpture of Poseidon. All the guests were dressed to the nines in varying shades of blue, green, and silver, including me.
After much deliberation, I’d selected a seafoam green silk tulle gown with a strapless bodice and a gorgeous, frothy skirt that cascaded to the floor in graceful layers. I’d kept my jewelry minimal except for a pair of show-stopping gold and green quartz earrings that grazed my shoulders and my engagement ring. The effect was simple but striking.
“Great.” Jordan gave me a distracted smile. “I’ll be right back.”
While he spoke with Dante, I wandered over to the main bar and ordered a water with a twist of lime. I’d slacked on my diet the past few weeks, and I was on a strict alcohol ban until the wedding.
“Tell him that’s unacceptable.” A furious voice brought my attention to the woman sitting a few stools down. “ No , I will not co-chair with Sebastian Laurent. I don’t care if he’s the last man on—Mom. Please.” Her sigh encompassed a world of exasperation. “I understand, but can we discuss this later? I’m at the Valhalla gala. Okay, yes. Yes, I know. Good night.”
She hung up and rubbed her temple.
She was beautiful in a natural, effortless way. She had the shiniest hair and the longest, thickest lashes I’d ever seen. Her toned, athletic body was clad in an exquisite blue dress, and her smooth brown skin and sculpted cheekbones gave some of the models I knew a run for their money.
She also looked oddly familiar. With a start, I realized she’d been at my bachelorette. She was one of Sloane’s other clients.
She must’ve felt my eyes on her before she dropped her hand and glanced at me.
“Sorry,” I said, embarrassed. “I didn’t mean to eavesdrop, but…you’re Maya, right? I think you were at my bachelorette.”
It was an odd way to meet. Most brides wouldn’t allow strangers to join their premarital celebrations, but nothing about this wedding was normal.
“I was.” Maya brightened. “Thanks for letting me tag along. I was with Vivian since she’s planning my birthday party, and when the call came in, I had to come. I hadn’t played laser tag in ages.” Her expression turned sheepish. “I hope it wasn’t weird, since we…”
“Barely know each other?” I smiled. “It’s okay. It was a fun time, and I enjoy meeting new people.”
“Good. I know we’ve technically met, but I’m going to reintroduce myself anyway.” She held out her hand. “Maya Singh. Happy to be a backup bridesmaid if you need one since I’ve already crashed your bachelorette.”
I laughed and shook her hand. “Ayana Kidane. I’ll add your name to my backup roster.”
Maya’s grin widened. Sloane had introduced us at the laser tag venue, but there’d been so many people and so much going on that we didn’t get a chance to really talk.
Singh. It was a common surname. But given her presence at Valhalla, Maya had to be one of the Singhs—a large and extraordinarily wealthy family who’d made a killing in the frozen foods industry. They’d since expanded their empire to include snacks, beverages, and confectionaries, among other things.
Basically, you couldn’t walk into a single supermarket or convenience store without seeing at least a dozen brands that fell under the Singhs’ corporate umbrella.
“Well, I’m invited to the Ireland reception, so you’ll see me regardless.” Maya shook her head. “I can’t believe the church ceremony was moved up by several months. I understand why it’s necessary, but you’re better than me because the change would’ve sent me spiraling.”
“It’s not ideal,” I admitted.
“Are you excited about the reception at least?” Maya signaled the bartender for another drink.
“Of course.” My voice pitched a little higher than I would’ve liked.
“It’s okay. You don’t have to bullshit me. I know what those big weddings are like.” She rolled her eyes. “When my older sister got married, my parents invited everyone they knew. I kid you not, there were two thousand guests at the Indian ceremony. My sister never even met half those people, but they had to be on the guest list or it would be ‘socially unacceptable.’”
“There’s going to be seven hundred guests at ours. It’s not two thousand, but I feel you.” I grimaced. “That receiving line is going to be torture.”
“Wear comfortable shoes and bring hand sanitizer,” Maya advised. “Or just drink so much champagne they all blur into one giant conga line of smiles and congratulations.”
I laughed again. I wished we’d had a chance to talk more at my bachelorette. There was something about her that instantly put me at ease.
Our conversation gradually shifted from wedding woes to travel, fashion, and our mutual dislike of pumpkin-flavored foods and drinks (it was fall, so they were everywhere, but I was a sweet potato person).
Maya was surprisingly down to earth for someone whose family was worth several billion dollars. It was also nice to finally chat with someone who had zero ties to my work. She wasn’t involved in the modeling world, and we didn’t have a professional relationship. She was just someone I clicked with.
“I wish Sloane would’ve introduced us earlier. You’re way more fun than half the people I’m forced to deal with on a daily basis.” Maya sighed. She glanced over my shoulder, and her perfectly shaped brows rose a centimeter. “Wow. The Serb is here. Now that’s a surprise.”
I whirled around before I could stop myself.
Despite the hundred plus people crowding the ballroom, I spotted Vuk immediately. The air seemed to warp around him as he entered. Space and time bent to the indomitable force of his presence, and he was the picture of devastation in his black tuxedo.
My pulse fluttered.
I quickly looked away before he caught me staring. Still, my back tingled with awareness. It didn’t matter how near or far he was; I always felt it when he was in the same room.
“ Oh .” Maya’s eyes widened. “He’s headed our way.”
“Really? I mean…” I took a gulp of water. “Interesting.”
I hadn’t seen Vuk in person since the rage room. I’d wanted to text him multiple times over the past two weeks, but I kept chickening out. What would I say anyway?
Hey, thanks for letting me smash shit in your basement. By the way, do you want to come over for tea sometime?
No, thanks.
“Oops. Never mind.” Maya was still invested in whatever he was doing behind me. Vuk didn’t attend galas often, so his presence was always a novelty. “I was wrong. He’s talking to the Davenports.”
My chest pinched with disappointment. I peeked behind me again. Vuk was, indeed, talking to Dominic and Alessandra Davenport.
He was facing my way. This time, his eyes slid toward me when I turned. The corner of his mouth tipped up in a knowing smirk.
Shit . Caught red-handed.
Warmth curled around my neck and ears. I yanked my gaze away and finished the rest of my water.
When did it get so hot in here?
“Are you okay?” Maya asked. Her brow furrowed. “You look a little flushed.”
“Mm-hmm.” Don’t look back. Don’t look back. “Actually, I, um, have to use the restroom, but I’m so glad we were able to chat. This was fun. We should exchange numbers in case you want to grab brunch or hang out sometime. If you want,” I added quickly.
I fought the urge to cringe. Making friends as an adult was like dating—equal parts awkward and mortifying, but when it worked out, it was worth the discomfort.
Maya’s smile dazzled. “I’d love to.”
After I got her number, I left the ballroom. I really did need to use the restroom, but I had an ulterior motive.
I deliberately passed by Vuk on my way out. I didn’t look at him, but the heat of his gaze seared into my skin.
Thankfully, there was no line at the restroom. I quickly used the facilities and touched up my makeup. When I exited, the hall was empty.
I deflated. Perhaps I’d misread the situation. Perhaps?—
The ballroom doors swung open. Broad shoulders and crisp black lines filled the frame. Just like that, my heart beat faster again.
Vuk’s gaze came my way, cool and assessing.
I ignored him and walked upstairs, my pulse thudding with each step. The second floor was deserted. I kept walking until I reached the doors at the very end of the hall.
The roar of my pulse grew louder. I inhaled a small breath and, with a quick twist of the door handles, stepped inside the Valhalla Club library. Moonlight trickled through the stained-glass windows; hushed silence stretched from the plush carpet to the triple-height ceiling.
I felt rather than heard Vuk enter behind me. A moment later, the doors shut with a soft click, and a shiver ran from my head all the way to my toes.
“You should be downstairs.” His rough voice pebbled my skin with goosebumps.
I finally turned. “So should you.” I kept my voice light and airy. “You’re the one who followed me.”
Vuk regarded me from half a dozen feet away. His face was hard and unsmiling. Tell me to leave.
“No.”
The word traveled between us on a thread of defiance. I hadn’t come this far to back out now. If he wanted to leave, he’d have to do it himself. I wasn’t going to give him an easy out.
Vuk released a sharp exhale. You didn’t get dressed up to hang out with me in a library.
Maybe not, but I’d be lying if I said I hadn’t hoped Vuk would make an appearance tonight.
“Once again, you’re the one who followed me here,” I said, knowing full well I’d baited him into doing so.
And you’re the one who wants me to stay.
Also true.
The seconds ticked by without a response from me or a movement from him. The silence stretched, smoldering with all the banked heat and breathless yearning we shouldn’t want.
Vuk’s gaze slid from my face down to my throat and over my chest. It skimmed past my stomach and hips and dragged, leisurely, over the length of my legs before coming back up to meet my eyes.
All the breath swept out of me in one soft wave. A thousand fireflies danced over my skin in the wake of his scrutiny. It’d been so warm, so intimate , that I felt it as surely as a lover’s caress.
Why did you come to me first the other week?
I was so light-headed it took me a moment to piece together his question. He was asking about Wentworth.
“Because you’re the one I wanted to see in that moment.” The truth came out easily. In another time or place, I might’ve lied, but we were beyond that. “There’s no other reason. That was it.”
Vuk’s throat moved with a hard swallow.
“Wentworth vanished,” I added softly. “Do you happen to know anything about that?”
No. The glitter of satisfaction in Vuk’s eyes told me otherwise. But I imagine justice found him.
A shiver dripped down my spine.
His involvement in the photographer’s disappearance should make me uneasy. Wentworth operated on pure ego, and whatever Vuk did had to have been extreme to make the photographer go underground. But I’d gone unheard for so long, and I’d been fighting alone for so many years, that Vuk’s decision to take matters into his own hands made me feel protected more than anything else.
“Do you think he’s alive?” I asked cautiously. That was the one line I didn’t want to cross.
Vuk shrugged. If he’s smart and takes care of himself.
“I see.” I licked my lips. His eyes dropped to my mouth again, and the earlier heat came roaring back to life.
My breath shortened, and any thoughts about Wentworth, work, or the world outside this room dissolved beneath the weight of Vuk’s gaze.
Whatever he saw in my face made his darken. You’re getting married this month.
“I know.”
The quiet admission erased any plausible deniability I might’ve had. I couldn’t use alcohol as an excuse tonight. I knew exactly what I was doing.
It would be different if I still thought Vuk hated me or was tolerating me for Jordan’s sake, but the events of the past few weeks proved he wanted me too—no matter how much he tried to hide it.
And yet, here we were. Trapped on opposite sides of an ocean, separated by our loyalty to a man who’d done nothing wrong. I’d made a promise to Jordan, but the scope of that promise didn’t encompass this .
Genuine feelings. Heady possibilities. The tease of a world that’d long been out of reach.
“Do you remember when you asked me whether I loved him?” My quiet question made Vuk’s eyes flare. “The truth is, I don’t. Not romantically.”
This time, his body trembled from the force of his exhale.
“He doesn’t love me either,” I said. “He never has.”
The library was so silent I could hear the weight of my admission as it slid off my shoulders and drifted to the floor. I was bare and naked with vulnerability—half my heart in my throat, the other half in my hand.
After all the pretense, the lies and deception and denial, this was where I’d ended up. Right where I wanted to be.
“Why are you telling me this?” Vuk’s voice was cool, but the fire in his eyes blazed hot enough to make my toes curl.
Why was I telling him this? What was I hoping for? That he would admit he had feelings for me? That he would sweep me off my feet and make all my problems disappear with a snap of his fingers?
He had the power to do that, but I didn’t want a magic fix. I wanted…
Him.
That was all this was. I didn’t care about his money or power. I didn’t care about his dubious actions toward Wentworth or other people who deserved it. I didn’t care about yesterday, tomorrow, or three weeks from now.
I only cared about this moment, right here, with the two of us.
“Because I want you to know,” I said. “And because I…I don’t want you to feel guilty.”
“About what?”
“About what I want you to do right now,” I whispered.
Vuk closed the distance between us with slow, deliberate steps. His normally pale eyes were the color of midnight in the dim light, and he moved with the coiled grace of a predator on the hunt.
I held my ground even as fear and desire throbbed between my thighs.
He stopped inches from me. “What you want me to do.” His tone was lethally soft. “And what might that be?”
The scent of his cologne stole into my lungs, robbing me of words. I licked my lips again. My gaze touched his mouth, and a tortured noise rumbled past his throat.
It was the first tangible sign he was losing control.
The flames pulsed hotter; my skin drew so tight I felt every minuscule shift in the air. The atmosphere was so dense, the tiniest spark could set it ablaze.
“Take off your ring.” Vuk’s harsh command was a shot of whiskey straight to my veins.
Fever gripped me, making me dizzy. My skin flushed, and there was a slight shake in my hand as I slid the diamond off my finger.
He watched, his eyes dark and merciless, as the tight band finally popped free.
I placed it on the table behind me. It’d barely hit the mahogany surface before Vuk grabbed the back of my neck and swallowed my gasp with his mouth.
The flames exploded into a wildfire. Smoke and heat raced through my blood, consuming me from the inside out. His skin was the only cool reprieve in a world ablaze, and my hands roamed over him, desperately seeking something to appease this aching, insatiable want inside me.
Vuk groaned. He lifted me up and set me on the table, his kiss ravenous, almost punishing. When I wrapped my legs around his waist, urging him closer, he nipped my bottom lip in a light warning.
“Careful, srce moje .” His voice rasped against my sensitized skin. “Or you’ll fucking kill me.”
My fingers curled around a fistful of his shirt. “Good,” I breathed.
Vuk squeezed. His fingers dug into the sides of my neck, and an embarrassing moan escaped before his mouth covered mine again.
This. This was what I’d been missing. I couldn’t put a name to it before because I’d never experienced it, but it was wild and reckless and everything I imagined a kiss would be.
This was the type of kiss that made time stop. I never wanted to leave. I never wanted it to end.
My soft pants mingled with his heavy breaths. His palm burned into my skin as it slid over the curve of my shoulder and down, down past my waist to?—
A loud crash yanked us out of the moment and dumped us into a vat of ice water.
Vuk’s touch disappeared. Goosebumps popped up in the resulting chill, and our eyes flew to the door.
The noise had come from the hall. Whoever made it hadn’t come in yet , but the boisterous laughter followed by a giddy giggle proved we weren’t the only ones who’d snuck out of the ballroom in search of privacy.
Vuk’s attention returned to me. My high from the kiss came crashing down at the ice in his eyes.
Reality had set in.
His gaze swept over me. A muscle ticked in his jaw, and his throat flexed with an unspoken curse before he tore his eyes away and left. The doors shut behind him, harder this time.
He didn’t have to say the curse for me to hear it. Fuck .
As in, what the fuck had we done?
The laughter in the hall faded. Whoever it belonged to wasn’t coming in here.
So I sat there, my heart racing, my hair and dress mussed from the most thorough ravishing of my life. My ring had fallen onto the carpet, where it glinted accusingly up at me.
I should’ve felt guilty. My fiancé was probably downstairs looking for me while I was busy kissing his best man. If Vuk and I hadn’t been interrupted, we would’ve done more than kiss.
I let out a small breath. I didn’t move to pick up the ring.
Yes, I should feel guilty, but I didn’t.
It was hard to regret what happened when I’d never felt so beautifully, wonderfully alive.