Chapter 23 Dahlia
DAHLIA
Paris. The city of love will forever remain ingrained in my memory as the place where I fell so deeply in love with him that it’s irreversible. He’s embedded in my soul, stitched with a golden thread around my heart.
While he takes a call, I palm the window of the penthouse suite, enjoying the unobstructed view of the majestic Eiffel Tower, where we’ll head for dinner.
After we landed, the driver brought us to this exclusive hotel. After checking in, we went back out, wanting to discover every corner of this bustling capital.
I should be tired after walking for so long.
But ambling through the city felt divine.
The anonymity, the holding of hands as we discovered this fascinating metropole.
For a few hours, I forgot everything about the impossibility of us, even our lives.
Here we are just Mika and Dahlia, not the Pakhan and his best friend’s little sister.
I sense Mika long before he places a hand on my back. My lungs fill up with his heady scent like he’s the oxygen I drag into my starved lungs.
His hard body presses into mine, cocooning me in blissful heat. My wall of protection.
“Let’s never leave,” I murmur, feeling nostalgic for a life that we could lead. It’s so unfair.
“Then we won’t,” he says, tone etched in determination, freeing millions of butterflies in my belly.
The change in him is unmistakable. I don’t know if I wore him down, or after having me, he’s incapable of staying away. The knowledge elates me, but it also terrifies me. Our love comes at a price I am not willing to pay.
My brother would never understand. He would paint him as guilty, denying him a fair trial.
I was the only witness that mattered in our messed-up situation.
I’ve never blamed Mika. God knows he has blamed himself for both of us.
There simply wasn’t another solution, so I refused to entertain all those what-ifs. It happened. We can’t change the past.
While I love all the touristy stuff, blending in, that won’t be the case tonight.
He’s dressed in a dark grey, custom-made suit that fits his muscular body and the dangerous dark vibe he emanates so well.
I am wearing a silver satin dress that falls to my ankles.
Two thin straps hold the dress, while a deep V dips in front and back.
Our attires match, the image sending a jolt of glee through my body. We look like a couple.
I feel sexy yet sophisticated. The appreciative gleam flickering in his eyes shows he approves. I don’t wear this dress for me, but for him, wanting his entire attention on me.
I catch something sparkly dangling from his hand, and my eyes instantly widen.
Okay, so maybe we didn’t do just the touristy stuff, but on our stroll, I discovered this jewelry shop that had one-of-a-kind jewelry.
And while my eye caught a diamond engagement ring with a price attached that had me blinking: 1.
6 million euros. I know the astronomical price because I asked once I saw him talking to a salesperson.
It was the only thing I truly wanted from there, aware I would never get the engagement ring. So I told him, I found nothing.
I guess he did. The necklace looks like gold leaves interlaced with diamonds, with an oval emerald trailing down. Putting it around my neck, I brush my fingertip along the intricate craftsmanship. He must have paid a fortune for it.
After he locks it, I turn around only to see that the necklace is part of a set, having matching earrings and a bracelet.
“Mika, it’s too much…” I whisper, the awe in my voice unmistakable.
“Nothing is too much for you.”
I sigh dreamily, and as he helps me put the set on completing the luxurious yet elegant look, I cross my arms around his neck. Even in heels, I don’t even reach his chin. But I love the height difference. It makes me feel feminine.
“Thank you,” I murmur, and lifting on my toes, I press my mouth to his.
We kiss for long minutes, languidly as if we have all the time in the world. Kissing him takes me to a place where all my dreams are within reach. I just have to wish them, and they materialize.
A low groan reverberates in his throat, eyes burning up with uncontained passion. “Let me take my woman out before I forget my damn mind and bring you to bed and lose myself in you.”
His woman. That’s the only thing my mind gets stuck on, repeating it in my head like a heavenly symphony.
My hands itch to play, to create a different type of music. I know what my gift will be. While he has inspired all my compositions, this one will have a different tune—more love, less heartache.
The suite has a piano I barely touched. I don’t want to lose myself in music. For now, I just want to lose myself in him.
Guiding me toward the door with his hand firmly planted on my exposed back, warmth rushes through my body, heating me from the inside.
I am insatiable for this man. Absolutely gone—mind, body, heart.
Outside the hotel, the driver opens the rear door for us. Once inside, he takes my hand in his, interlinking our fingers. He rests them on his thigh, rubbing his thumb up and down my palm.
“Am I dreaming?” I ask, still not sure.
He leans into me, brushing his nose along my cheek. “Does it feel like you’re dreaming?”
If he could, he’d make all my wishes come true, dissolving my insides into a puddle.
“Yes,” I smile, being in a playful mood.
He arches a brow. “Then I better give you the proof that you’re not.”
His words linger between us with the promise of decadence—in and out of bed.
I should forsake wearing underwear as I am constantly drenching them in his presence.
“You’re incorrigible,” I chastise, but my teasing tone betrays me.
As our eyes lock, I forget we’re in Paris. That I should gaze out the window to not lose a single moment, but no sight compares to him, trapping me in his gray orbit.
We don’t break eye contact, our souls having an entire conversation. We remain silent while the love transpiring between us blasts for acknowledgement.
We tear our gazes away only when the driver says, “We’re here.”
Craning my head, the tower appears to kiss the clouds bathed in glittering lights.
Hand in hand, he brings me to the elevator and up to the restaurant. Inside, I come to an abrupt halt, my eyes widening. There’s no one else but us.
“I didn’t want interruptions,” he says as if reading my confusion.
My heart leaps out of my chest as if searching for a secret door to escape to him.
From the panoramic view, Paris spreads all around us in a golden halo. The ma?tre d’ welcomes us, bringing us to a table by the window.
Placing the menus in front of us, he returns with a bottle of wine Mika approves of with a nod. After filling our glasses, he retreats—silent, making himself unseen like a shadow.
He raises his glass in a toast. “To an unforgettable night.”
Clinking them, a sound brimming with delight escapes my mouth. “Every moment with you is unforgettable.”
He does everything right. So thoughtful. Romantic. Present. I get high on his undivided attention. If I ever overdose on needing him, it’s fine by me.
In the background, dim music makes the atmosphere even lovelier.
Cocking his head, he taps two fingers on the table, his features sharpening with somberness. “You could have it all, Dahlia. Play on the biggest stages in the world. I don’t want you to miss a thing.”
But he wouldn’t be there. And I would miss him too much to enjoy that life.
“I have everything I want back home.” You. My safe routine.
While he wants me to have the world, my needs are simpler.
He closes his eyes for a moment, but I catch that flicker of misery as if I settle for less.
Finding his hand on the table, I give it a light squeeze. “You didn’t trap me, Mika. You created a world for me where I feel safe.”
His teeth grit together. “I caused it.”
I guess we’re going there. Inhaling deeply, I prepare myself. What better moment to rehash our past, hoping tonight will bury the hurt for good.
“Okay, tell me what you would have done differently.”
His jaw tightens, hand fisting on the table. “I should have seen it coming.”
“No. I’m talking about that particular situation.
I might have been the one captive, but you were a prisoner just as much.
Without you, I would have lost myself there.
” I hold his gaze to show him my perspective.
“If another man touched me, if your father succeeded in enacting his plan to break me until he killed me… it would have been irrelevant if I survived.”
“Don’t say that!” His eyes narrow as if the thought alone turns him murderous—feral with rage.
I offer a small smile, etched in understanding.
“That doesn’t mean it didn’t traumatize me, Mika.
My kidnapping stripped me of my dignity, shattering my rose colored glasses.
I’ve shed the na?ve girl to survive and lost my capacity to trust people’s intentions.
But what affected me most was that both you and my brother thought it broke me.
That I wasn’t strong enough to overcome what happened, so I played the role. ”
“Fuck,” he leans back, scrubbing a hand down his face.
I shrug, the weight on my shoulders dropping with every confession. “I don’t deny that I have been terrified for a long time, thinking someone would jump me and continue what Igor couldn’t.”
His hard, stormy stare pins me. “I would rather raid this world and spill humanity’s blood than allow that to ever happen again.”
He intertwines our fingers, both of us drawing strength from our connection.
“I know… thank you, but with time, I wanted you to see past that broken and scared girl, and see me as the woman who survived. Who, even when she had no choice, she chose to give herself to you. I wanted you so much, Mika, that I was blind to where we were and why you did that. You were raped too,” I choke out.
My eyes glisten with unshed tears. I’ve lived with this feeling of guilt and shame for so long.
Standing up, the chair topples over, and he gets on his knees by my side, taking my hands in his, looking ashen. “Baby girl…No.”
“But it feels like that. You didn’t want to kiss me, but you ended up having to take me anyway.”
That’s my greatest fear—his giving in this week is because of misplaced guilt.
Inhaling deeply, his chest expands with a ragged breath as his eyes bore into mine.
“I wanted you, Dahlia. Even if I shouldn’t have.
I wanted you so much that I punished myself by refusing to kiss someone so pure, so beautiful, so talented when I am a killer with no remorse, a sinner with no conscience, a monster in human appearance.
I’ve never been ashamed of what I am, but in that moment, I wanted to be anyone else so I could selfishly take you.
Not kissing you that day has haunted me. ”
He wanted to kiss me, too? I stare at him in utter disbelief while my famished heart latches onto his confession with greedy, grabby little fingers.
His eyes glisten with potent emotions. “And then, the only beautiful dream I had got tainted by the world I was born into. When I took your virginity in that warehouse while my father taunted and his men cheered, all I could think of was to make it right by you.”
I sigh. “But not even a hundred more purses could do that.”
“You still like them.”
I roll my eyes at him. “That’s not the point. You don’t need to buy my forgiveness. There was nothing to forgive. You killed your father for me. I don’t know how you never hated me.”
“I could never hate you, baby girl,” he says so sincerely that another tear falls down my face.
“I always make you cry,” he says, lowering his head so I can sever his head in punishment.
I can’t have that. Palming his cheek, I bring his gaze back up. “It was his right to seek revenge. He was an evil man, but so was my father. You’re nothing like him.”
“No, I’m a hundred times worse when it comes to you.”
I nod, accepting him wholeheartedly. I kiss his lips, and he drags in a lungful of air as if I gave him absolution. I feel lighter too. The constant guilt eased.
Right in time for the first course to arrive.
As we dig into the delicious meal, I feel playful, so I lift my leg and place the foot of my sandal at his groin.
He groans over a spoonful of soup, drawing a giggle from my throat.
“Dahlia, baby girl, I’m trying here.”
I tilt my head, watching my manicure innocently. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
The mischievous smirk he gives me drips with sexual depravity.
While he clasps his hand around my ankle, trailing his fingers up and down my calf, I pat the corners of my mouth with the napkin, asking, “How would you like to go at the end of a long and fulfilled life?”
“Buried in you,” he says without even pulling a grimace.
I throw my head back and laugh, long enough that my stomach aches and my eyes are wet with tears.
“Hmm, do you think you could still get it up? I mean, we women can all our lives, but you men…” I don’t know why I always like to poke the beast. It’s like I am addicted to the rush of adrenaline kicking in, making me feel bold, adventurous—alive.
He cocks his head, rubbing his thumb along his lower lip. Should the gesture be this sexual? At this point, I think his breathing is hot.
“You’ll tell me after a lifetime of taking my cock in your holes.”
I swallow hard. “All two?”
“All three,” he says matter-of-factly.
Never breaking eye contact, he places my foot down, leaving me in a state of horniness and thinking about the other hole he hasn’t claimed. The heated gaze he sends my way reveals it will happen, and soon.
Right then, the ma?tre d’ brings the second course, dousing the fire dancing between us.
“Just a heads up. Eat it all like a good girl because once we’re back in the hotel, the only thing that will get in your mouth is my cum.”
I think I came a bit in my thong, and I squirm in my seat. “You’re so cruel.”
He smirks. “You have seen nothing yet, baby girl.”
“Have you ever been in love?” I blurt out, needing to change the topic and fast before I combust, realizing what I asked too late. Ugh, I could slap myself. It’s selfish of me, but I am convinced no one could love him like I do.
“I don’t want to know,” I rush to add, looking out the window, watching the artificial golden hue spread over the city.
“You want to know. And you want the answer to be no. Because you’re a greedy girl who wants my all.”
I shrug, not bothering to deny it.
“Look at me.” The edge threading his unyielding tone demands my compliance.
Bracing myself, I slowly turn my head to him.
The intensity in his eyes undoes me. “The answer is fucking no. You have it all. Always have. Always will.”
This is no less than a declaration of love, and my mood instantly brightens.