Chapter 42
Chapter
Forty-Two
Selene
Idig my heels into the mattress. “There’s no way I can sleep,” I grunt as I pull my knees up.
A smile appears as I assess my body, then gaze at the balcony. My thighs clench at the memory. Warm breath moves across my open lips. Titus’s body and mine had moved as one. Sex had never been about coming together before.
Sex with Titus was like rain caressing your face after months-long battles.
Slow, deliberate in cleansing you. Each droplet that hugged my body—each press of his fingers into my soft skin—wanted to remind me I survived, and now there will be peace and admiration.
His fingers were rivers rolling over every inch of me, pushing away any memory of another’s touch.
His lips were as warm as the sun as it slipped through the rain cloud, reminding me that hope was always in sight.
Sex with Titus was a new destination, a new sense, an unimaginable level of pleasure. My fingers brush over where he bit me. He fed from me, his mate… I’ve never felt so powerful.
I gave him what no other could. There was a sharp sting when his fangs broke my skin, but before the pain could reach my fingertips, it changed as fast as the northern winds.
Pleasure seems a word too lacking. I came as water over a fall does—it ramps up, closer and closer to the edge.
Faster! Faster! Then I dove, jumped, flew. Leaping to a new destination.
Then we landed, and all those feelings and emotions merged into a calm body of water. I wanted to relax on the banks and study it for its beauty.
I tentatively climb out of bed. I’m so exhausted, but I somehow have energy. Oh… that ache between my legs. I like it. Flaring open my fingers, I feel some of my life magic. I need more sleep to recharge fully.
Titus’s scent fills my lungs. Masculine but whimsical—an uncontrollable ocean tide. It makes me want to jump off the boat that has trapped me so I can swim beside him.
Sunlight pouring in from my window causes me to blink. Titus left last night. He should have returned by now. My fingers touch our mark. I can feel he’s safe, but there is an anxiousness playing on the cord. Is it Titus or me? Probably me.
“Tristen!” I shout as I swing open the door, spotting him leaning on the wall, one foot crossed over his ankle, just smirking at me with tired eyes. He stayed awake all night guarding me.
“Yes, mate-in-law,” he yawns.
“Stop calling me that.” I stomp forward. “I need Titus. Now.”
“Need him how?” Tristen’s eyes swirl with sardonic delight. “Because I don’t think the palace can survive another sexual screaming fest.”
I can’t help but cringe. “Stop!”
“That’s exactly what I said when you first started shouting. I mean, the moans were fine, but the shouts?”
I slap his chest, mortified. “I did not scream.”
“You’re right. You roared.” He tips his head back and laughs.
“Oh, gods.” I cover my face in horror.
“Hey, some guys like that. Don’t be ashamed. Screams are sexy; if I had a chick here to hook up with, I’d be all for it, but I’ve got blue balls and no time to rub one out.”
“Ew!”
“What, you had a brother?”
“My brother was… not like most men. He never mentioned his sex life.”
Tristen frowns. “Well, the guys talk about sex. All the time. So get used to it.”
I bite my cheek. “Titus does?” Jealousy makes my stomach swell. Stop. You hooked up; you each have a past.
Tristen rubs his jaw. “He… was discreet. Always has been. It’s more me, Nero, and Ember.”
“Oh,” I reply with less confidence than I had a minute ago. “Let’s go get Titus. You and I should be in on these plans.”
“It’s about time.” Tristen pushes off the wall with a Cheshire grin. “I thought you had become dick-whipped.”
“Hey!” I slap his arm, but he laughs.
“I know you, Selene. You don’t do as you’re told, so I’ve been eagerly waiting for you to tell me to cause trouble. Fuck Titus for ordering us both here! You can fuck him; I’ll just annoy him.” He winks. “Let’s go see what he and Adrian have planned.”
“So now you’re going to do as I say?” I cross my arms.
“When it benefits me, yes. Make no mistake, you’re not leaving my side. But first,” he looks me up and down, “I think you should change.”
Shit. I’m still in my sleeping dress. I hurry back inside, grabbing my leather training uniform, but silk catches my eye. Racks of dresses women crave and men adore fill my closet.
Does Titus like silk?
Reaching, I run my fingers down the smooth material. I want to look pretty for Titus, but I also don’t want to appear weak. He’s witnessed me only in training attire for weeks.
I grab silk pants and put them on. The material is cool and soft. I find a matching top; the high collar rests against my collarbone, keeping my mate mark tucked carefully away. I put my leather belt around my hips, with the dagger on my side warming the silk against my outer thigh.
There’s not enough time to brush out the knots in my hair, so I quickly twist it into a bun. I find a mirror. Ugh! I slap my cheeks to add a blush. I step back and nod approvingly at my image.
Tristen raises himself onto his elbows. He made himself at home on my bed, closing his eyes for all of five minutes. “Silk and daggers,” Tristen comments as he combs his hair with his fingers. “I like it.”
“Ready?”
“Whips and chains?” He bounces off the mattress like a child.
I halt. “What?”
“That’s a no, then.”
“You seriously think about sex all the time, don’t you?”
“Not all the time. I think about blood, guts, and glory, then having sex after.”
“So all the time, since sex is the end goal,” I say flatly.
Tristen’s face lights up. “I have a healthy sex imagination, but life is lacking,” he groans. “We’re always fighting. We never stay in towns long, so I have no chance of a relationship.” He pauses and searches the hall before we enter it.
“You want one?” I guess.
“I don’t know,” he sighs. “Sometimes it looks nice; other times, I think freedom is better.” He slips his hand onto his sword and then opens the door to the courtyard. Once he determines we’re safe, we proceed. His eyes take a moment and look up at the sky with a deep, painful longing.
“Maybe you’ll find a mate.”
“Unlikely.” His stare plummets back down. “I can only commit to a target on the battlefield.”
“Dating is a battle with different weapons.”
A smile escapes him with a snort.
We dash through the gardens to the guard building. Adrian’s office is on the top floor. I can’t wait to pluck all these black roses out and toss them into a fire.
Once we exit the safety of the inner walls, Tristen’s walk changes; he’s quick-footed like a cat jumping from window to dresser, eyes scanning every inch before he allows us to take a step. Some guards observe us, but they don’t impede. They just nod, then cast their eyes down, avoiding mine.
How are Titus and I going to unite these men? They hate me.
We enter the causeway that the warriors use, so they won’t muddy the streets.
Black arched stones tower above, creating the ominous look the architect intended.
My exhales become a whisper. “Tristen.” I grab his biceps and peer at the stars.
Their light is so far away it can’t guide us towards hope. “There’s shouting.”
He takes a hand and holds it tight. “Yeah.” He nods, and his sword is out before I can blink.
My hand swings to my hip for my dagger, and shadows blind me. I reach for Tristen’s back so I don’t trip.
“I can’t see,” I panic. His shadows thicken. Unlike before, where his shadows formed a shield, they now allow me no room to see him.
His arm slips around my waist, and my hips press into his side. “Trust me,” he guides me along the way as more shouts sound.
“That’s coming from the nobles’ houses,” I state. Titus, where are you? I try to pull on that bond, but it’s a new muscle I have to train. I search it again. “I can’t feel the bond.”
Tristen hisses. “I knew it!”
“What?”
“He left! That’s why you can’t feel the bond. He’s going to kill Galen.”
My toes tingle as all the blood rushes to my aching heart. “No, he wouldn’t do that without me.”
“That bond on your chest tells me he would. He left me behind! I’m the only one he’d trust to protect you. I’m not honored; I’m angry. We always go into battle together. We have a ritual. This isn’t good. Fuck!”
My inhales are half as deep and twice as hard. “I’m going to kill him again,” I whisper.
“I call dibs.” Tristen snorts, but his hand turns tender as it rubs my back, trying to calm me.
I completely trust him as he blindly guides me. Our walk feels longer than night, and I lose myself in worry. My back hits the hard stone.
“Shhh,” he whispers.
“Where are we?”
“Just outside the armory. I knew it!”
“What’s happening? Lower the shadows so I can see.”
“Shhh,” he pushes me against the wall, using his own body as a shield. “Shadows are useless if you keep yapping.”
I swing my hand out, hitting something.
“Ouch! What was that for?” I can hear his smirk.
“Don’t condescend me! I’ll yap when I want!” I burst through his shadow like hot rays of the sun. I almost fall into a rose bush. Shadows wrap around my hips, and hands tug me back. “Let me see!”
“Fine.” The shadows float to my feet as Tristen takes a step in front of me.
Hurried steps alert my eyes to the direction the guards with weapons in hand are running. A heavy scent of roses coats my tongue. Fallen petals, torn open by the soles of boots, dirty the cobblestone streets.
Gods be with you, Titus.
A guard glances my way, jerking as if he’s a bug hitting a window, caught off guard by my sudden appearance. Tristen raises his blade. The guard steps back, dips his chin, and then continues on his way.
“They’re…”
“On our side. Shit!” Tristen chortles with mirth. “Adrian was telling the truth.” His glee warms some of my frigid ire over having been left behind.
“All this time, I was surrounded by men who hated Galen. I wasn’t the only one trapped living a lie, trying to find an ounce of joy in this cage,” I admit.