Chapter 18
Roksana
Rey’s muscular chest rose and fell while I lay still listening to his heartbeat.
The slow rhythmic breathing was so peaceful that I couldn’t help reaching out to run my fingers through his beard.
His messy raven hair was spread over the pillow, mouth slightly parted as he quietly snored.
It was the rest of a truly exhausted man, which made me wonder if he’d rested at all since we’d parted.
I withdrew my hand, not wanting to disturb him.
My mind was far from peaceful as I wrestled with telling him I was going south or letting my letter find him when he could no longer stop me.
Despite my bravado, I knew exactly how dangerous this journey would be.
This night could be our last, and I didn’t want him thinking I’d hidden something again, but what choice did I have?
If Ernesto Tivala caught me, I was as good as dead. He had to catch me first, not to mention the trick I now had up my sleeve, which no one else in the brotherhood possessed. Will it be enough?
The need to test the spell was overwhelming.
I drew an illusion sigil above Rey’s chest, then focused on his aether, picturing it in my mind as best as I could.
If this worked, I could mimic anyone, a stranger, Tivala’s servant, even the duke himself.
All it required was a brief touch, concentration, and my vivamancy to infuse a simple illusion spell.
The contour of my hand shimmered, and soft, dark hair spread over my forearm, covering the growing muscles. My palm hardened, sword-fighting calluses appearing on the pads of my fingers. It worked even better than I expected, mimicking Rey’s hand to perfection.
I released the magic, fascinated by the sight of my body returning to normal. I wouldn’t need it until the Tivalaran border, but I intended to practice casually on the way. A young maiden would be easiest, though pretending to be a man might be more useful if I could manage their mannerisms.
I exhaled slowly, my determination firming. When I return, you can scold me till my ears are burning, but I won’t trouble you with things you can’t change, and I won’t let an argument spoil our last moments with fear and anger.
Rey’s face was so peaceful. His hair was short on one side and longer on the other, covering his scar and empty eye socket.
He’d changed for me, forgiven so much, and yet I was clinging to a life no longer mine.
If you want me as your queen, I’ll fucking rule as one.
I had to face the truth. I enjoyed being his shadow, but it took more than pillow talk to become his equal.
It took even more to not become a political pawn or broodmare.
Still, sharing him with any other woman was no longer an option.
I risked confessing, knowing how deeply he slept – a cowardly way to ease my guilt.
‘I’m doing this for us. I’ll silence the sneers of those who call me your low-born dalliance.’ My fingers moved, brushing his hair aside and uncovering the damaged flesh, living proof that even in the darkest times, there was hope. ‘I’ll return as a queen worthy of you and Dagome, or die trying.’
‘Viper… don’t go,’ Rey murmured, his arms tightening instinctively.
I froze, barely breathing but ready to deny it all, to tell him it was just a dream.
He hadn’t woken up, but I was unable to move, his strength effortlessly holding me in place.
Gods, I wish this moment would never end.
I cursed the dawn’s pale blush on the horizon, cutting our time short.
Rey had to go, but I couldn’t leave him without protection.
The amulet was warm beneath my hand. My little trinket, made with love, protected more than him.
‘Tova would be proud,’ I muttered, huffing with amusement.
My dwarf warlock hadn’t heard his new nickname, but it suited him.
Especially after he crafted this little miracle.
Still, the aether in the stone was fading.
I called on my vivamancy, determined to fill the gem with as much power as I could.
‘Sanika? What are you doing?’ Rey’s sleepy voice came from above, his hand drifting to my head, playing with my braid.
‘Strengthening your armour? You said my magic helped during the wraith’s attack. I’m ensuring that continues,’ I said, adding more power until Reynard hissed, his eyes snapping open as he grasped the chain, pulling the pendant off his skin.
‘I’m grateful, but it’s as hot as a blacksmith’s forge. I’m sure you don’t want me roasting inside my armour like a festival fowl,’ he said, chuckling at my remorseful expression.
Under Ciesko’s guidance, I’d become adept with vivamancy, but my emotions still affected the results.
My concern made it so bright, it lit the room with an eerie green glow.
Rey looked almost demonic and alluring. I chuckled, biting my lip.
‘Be the light for others to follow,’ I said, quoting Makosh’s priests.
In my wild imagination, I saw Rey holding the pendant like a beacon into battle.
‘Seriously, Viper? First Morana’s blessing, now the light of Makosh?’ He chuckled. ‘Do you want to turn me into a target for archers?’
‘Spoilsport,’ I muttered, embarrassed by my blunder, before dutifully correcting my mistake.
‘There. You’re all dark and broody like a proper soldier, but I refuse to remove the lavender scent.
’ I trailed my nose over his skin with an exaggerated sniff.
‘Your army may grumble, but I think all men should smell pretty before coming to bed.’
‘Grumble? They’ll think I’m magnificent and fashionable,’ he said with a laugh, shifting on the bed to look at me. ‘But if you keep mocking me, next time, I will ravage you straight from the battlefield, still covered in blood and gore, you sassy wench.’
I grinned at his threats, stretching out to kiss him. ‘Well, then I’ll certainly be impressed.’
Rey reached out to trace his thumb over my eyebrow with a look of utter devotion.
‘How do you make even the moonlight fade in the radiance of your smile? I can’t wait to hear another of your delicious insults.
’ His voice softened to a whisper. ‘I’m not ashamed to admit being besotted with you like never before.
My Viper, my little Vila, I’m so glad I came. ’
I wasn’t ready for this. The way he opened his heart to me without fear or restraint.
This beast of a man became vulnerable for me.
I swallowed, heart hammering in my chest. Years of discipline, of hiding my thoughts and feelings even from those I trusted, weren’t easy to forget.
I wanted to tell him everything. That the walls I’d built after my mother’s death crumbled one stone after another beneath his touch, but the soft, gentle words refused to come.
‘I’d burn the world to ash for you,’ I said instead. Rey frowned as he caught my gaze. The blush spreading over my cheeks must have looked ridiculous. I wished the bed would swallow me whole.
Rey smiled, tapping the tip of my nose. ‘I know, my Viper… but how about we build a better world together?’ I nodded with an embarrassed chuckle. He sat up on the bed, pulling me to his chest. ‘I have one request, though.’
‘Yes?’ I asked, confused by the playful tone in his voice.
‘Consider moving into the palace? Or allow me to hold court in your kitchen, though Tova might object to that. Just think about it, please.’ His chin landed on my shoulder when he exhaled slowly. ‘I have to go. I hate it, but I must.’
‘I wish we had more time,’ I said, sighing. ‘It could be weeks or even months until we see each other again.’
‘Months? Have faith in me, Viper.’ He grinned, standing up and stretching his muscular body. ‘I’ll return as soon as the situation is stable. Ivar is a capable Lord Marshal, and once we have the upper hand in the campaign, my presence there won’t be necessary.’
‘You would leave the campaign for me?’ I asked, exhaling when he shook his head.
‘No. As much as I want to be here, I wouldn’t leave my men suffering for my needs.
Still, I know how Riordan’s struggling. He can only hold the nobles at bay for so long before they start trouble.
There were reports about Tangra as well…
I have plenty of political reasons to return, but none are as appealing as your smile. ’
‘Just promise me you won’t rush headlong into every battle seeking victory. We’re good. As for the nobles, Riordan can handle them. I already helped a little.’ At the slight tremor in my voice, Rey’s eyes narrowed right in time for the first sun rays to appear.
‘Sana, what did you– Fuck! I wish we had talked earlier. Never mind. I trust you, Viper. I trust you with my life and my kingdom. I’m sure Ri’s already writing a detailed report on everything that happened.
’ He grabbed his trousers from the floor, and I stood up to join him, hissing at the cold wood.
Seeing him rushing back to war brought back my doubts.
Rey rubbed the goosebumps that appeared on my skin.
‘Go back to bed. It’s a frosty morning, and I can find my own way out.
’ He pulled on his shirt, and I helped him with the laces as he stuffed the tails into his waistband.
‘How about no?’ I reached for my chemise and started dressing. ‘I will see you off properly. Otherwise, it’s bad luck.’
‘I didn’t know you were superstitious.’ Reynard sighed, embracing me from behind and whispering in my ear, ‘It will be a quick run. It’s dawn, and Vahin doesn’t like being away from my brother. I can’t repay this favour by being late.’
I followed his gaze to the window, where dawn’s rose glow painted the horizon. ‘Then we’ll run. I want to see the dragon!’ I pulled away from his arms to grab my boots.
‘Fine. Just a word of warning, this dragon is an awful gossip, and everything you say will be repeated to Ormond.’ Rey rolled his eyes, but a contrary smile tugged at the corner of his mouth.