Chapter 12 - Mike
I stare at the screen and try to take it in.
It should be an easy answer. But my mind is frozen and I can’t focus on the words.
I know that Willow is sitting waiting for me to reply, and that every second that ticks by, she’s wondering why I haven’t.
But I can’t just answer something as big as this straight away. It wouldn’t be fair to her or to me.
When my wife died, I thought that was it. I was going to be alone for the rest of my life. Not just because I was old, but also because I thought no one could replace my wife.
I saw my life stretching out in front of me as a string of adventures full of meaningless sex and resigned myself to living alone.
But now…
Willow has slowly but surely captured my heart.
And while our sexual chemistry is undeniable, it’s the small gestures that truly make me fall for her; the way she gazes at me as if I’m her everything, the urge to shield her from life’s hardships when it gets too tough for her, and that radiant smile that lights up her face whenever she’s happy.
I want to be the one responsible for putting that smile on her lips.
I always thought that the age difference would be a problem.
We have so many things that we do differently.
She talks about things she saw on social media and has accounts on every platform and posts daily.
I have an old Facebook account that I’ve forgotten the password for.
Her Spotify is full of Taylor Swift, mine’s full of Journey and Chicago.
But we never run out of things to talk about.
And when she texts me things that I don’t understand, I look them up and usually find it’s something interesting.
I’m actually learning stuff about the modern world that I would’ve missed out on without meeting her.
It seems the age gap isn’t as bad as I thought.
But that’s not what’s keeping me from answering. All I have to do is glance up from my phone and see a picture of my wife looking back at me. She’s been gone a long time now, but she never really left. She’s always been around me, in my heart and memories.
Would she have liked Willow? I think she would have. She certainly would have liked her as a sub, but I also think she would’ve liked her as a person. But that doesn’t mean she would want me to date her.
I type a reply and think about it for a few minutes, then I delete it and type something else. I should’ve seen this coming, but with the cruise and then the party, I’ve only been focusing on how much I needed to fuck Willow.
My finger hovers above the send button.
Whatever I decide, it’ll mean a change for us from now on. Pressing the button will mean no going back.
I breathe in slowly, hold it, and then breathe out.
All I need to do is press the button.