Chapter 16 Keane
SIXTEEN
KEANE
Four more men milled around to entertain Lily on her latest outing, hopefully all of them ready to shower her with the attention she deserved and that her station demanded.
My role was to be invisible, but I’d come close to breaking that a couple of times on the last date when Theund had barely had the manners to reply to Lily’s attempts at conversation and Covack had fallen straight to sleep.
That man behaved like his favorite drink was a sleeping draught.
Perhaps Danzin was putting something in his drinks and secretly knocking out the competition.
I chuckled to myself because I needed to find the humor somewhere. Watching Lily with other men was hard, even when I kept reminding myself of my place in life. Perhaps everything seemed harder because of my place in her life.
This afternoon, Grimelda had sent Lily out to build a snowman with the other lords she hadn’t had a date with yet, and not all of them seemed used to the cold.
Today she was spending time with Lord Gusten and Lord Lasloe, both from Talador and comfortable in the snow, along with Lord Vasso and Lord Hirth.
Lord Vasso, whom Lily had dubbed Dopey, had the most issue with it, but Andaria was a more temperate kingdom, with talk of leafy forests and dappled sunshine.
It was probably somewhere I’d like to see one day, but for now I just maintained a steady gaze on their clumsiest export.
I glanced toward Vasso at that thought, just in time to see him launch a huge handful of snow right at Lily. It caught her full in the face and she coughed and sputtered. I started forward at the same time as Vasso, but he tripped over his other foot and landed face-down in a snow drift.
I ran over the snow, light on my feet after a lifetime of practice. Sun and Moon, I was standing too far from Lily if it took this long to reach her. That handful of snow could have been any sort of projectile, and I wouldn’t have been by her side to prevent serious damage.
“Your Majesty, I apologize,” I said.
Lily brushed off the top of her dress. “It’s just a bit of snow, Keane. I’m fine.”
I nodded, but still. It might not have been.
I stood closer to Lily as her suitors continued to pat snow onto their snowman.
Lord Vasso offered an apology to Lily, and she smiled up at him as she accepted.
He was probably the best-looking man here, not that I was an expert at such things, and I bristled seeing them together.
“Princess Lily!” Lord Lasloe, the one who wouldn’t quit smiling and laughing, boomed Lily’s name across the quiet clearing. A couple of birds took sudden noisy flight from a nearby tree, leaving snow to fall from their vacated branch.
Lily looked up and smiled at the man she’d nicknamed Happy. Perhaps she liked what she saw. I narrowed my eyes. He was definitely friendly, but perhaps a little too charming. I put him firmly in my mental no pile with the other six. None of them were good enough for her.
“May I escort you back to your carriage for a warm drink?” He held out his arm, all chivalry and manners.
She took his arm gracefully. “Why, Lord Lasloe, I’d be honored.”
They chatted the whole way back to the carriage and my steps seemed extra heavy as I realized I could be following Lily and the next king of Talador.
I stood outside the carriage as they drank some hot cocoa Lasloe had asked the cook to prepare before the outing, and my warm breath fogged up the windows from the outside as I kept constant careful watch.
Shortly, a second lord arrived, looking to take over from his competition. I beckoned him closer and knocked on the door of the carriage. “Your Majesty, Lord Hirth is here.”
Lord Lasloe groaned. “That’s my cue. It has been lovely to spend some time with you, Lily.”
My stomach twisted at his inappropriate use of her first name, but I battled to push my jealousy back down.
The second lord climbed into the carriage, and I shut the door behind him, but not before he produced a large handkerchief and proceeded to sneeze into it with gusto. Less than three noisy minutes later, he opened the carriage door and climbed back out.
“I can’t stay in there,” he wheezed. “I think I’m allergic to all the furs.”
I inclined my head in acknowledgment. It would be no great loss if he left this place.
“I’ll send the next man,” he called as he hurried away, seemingly relieved he didn’t have to sit with Lily any longer.
The next man turned out to be the clumsy oaf from Andaria. Really, only the Sun and Moon must have known where Dahlia found these men. Lord Vasso yanked on the handle to the carriage so he could climb in, and I winced as the spring snapped under the force he applied.
“Just climb in this side,” Lily called as she opened the other door. “I’ll move along to make space.”
It gratified me to see that Lily’s smile seemed a little thin. The carriage rocked whenever Vasso laughed, which seemed often, and as he left, Lily pushed down her window.
“Are you all right?” I asked.
“Just a little motion sickness, I think,” she murmured as she took in long breath after breath of air.
The last man arrived, the young one, and Lily smiled gracefully. “Lord Gusten, it’s nice to finally meet you properly.”
He blushed right up his neck to the tips of his ears, and I looked away from his obvious discomfort. She’d soon have him feeling more at ease, though, I thought bitterly.
I stood outside the carriage for longer than with the other three lords, and my heart sank a little.
Out of all them, this seemed to be the one she liked most. I’d tried not to focus too much on the cozy meetings happening inside the carriage, but each sound grated across my skin, and every touch across her skin made me grip the handle of my sword just a little tighter.
With every man who spent time with her, I died a little more. But I had to get myself together. Frustration at myself coursed through me. Lily needed a competent guard following her around, not a lovesick puppy.
Still, I was more glad than usual to ride alongside the carriage on the journey back to the palace. It meant that the courting opportunities were over, and that I could see Lily safely to her room.
She briefly greeted Rose and Iris, who were playing a game of cards in a corner of the great hall. It was the quietest I’d witnessed Princess Iris in a long time as she bit her lip to concentrate on the fan of cards in her hand.
“No, don’t stand for me. I’m a little tired,” Lily explained to Rose as she bent to give her a hug.
“I’m going to go straight to my room, and I’ll see you both at dinner.
I couldn’t possibly drink another drop of liquid.
I’m quite positive I’d float away if I did.
I’ve been plied with cocoa all afternoon. ”
I walked behind her down the stone corridor, my booted footsteps echoing sharply around us. Lily walked with her head lowered, like she was deep in thought.
“Are you all right?” I murmured.
“Fine, thank you,” she answered, but she paused outside her room. “I just have a lot on my mind.”
“How was your afternoon?” I managed to keep my tone light.
She rested her hand lightly on the stone doorframe outside her room. “That’s what I can’t stop thinking about.”
I studied her graceful fingers, imagining her touching one of those men, cupping his face or stroking his hair. The thought made me want to stab the theoretical man through with my blade.
“None of them are good enough for you,” I blurted before I slammed my mouth shut. I’d never been so inappropriate before.
Lily’s expression changed, her jaw becoming tight, her eyebrows drawing down. “Thank you, Keane, but I don’t believe that’s any of your business, and I haven’t asked for your opinion.”
“My apologies, Your Majesty.” I hadn’t intended to wear my heart on my sleeve quite so obviously, but her words stung anyway.
“I’m not sure you understand how difficult this is for me,” Lily continued, her voice low and controlled.
“I don’t have a choice. I have to marry one of these men for the good of Talador.
Dahlia thinks it will secure my rule and possibly save my life to have a strong king beside me.
If she and Garon believe these are the best men, I have to give them a chance.
” She finished on almost a pleading note, and I met her gaze, surprised to see the vulnerability in her eyes.
“I really am sorry.” I reached for her, my fingers grazing her hand before I let my arm drop back to my side. My desire to touch her, to connect like that, was inappropriate.
“I have to marry one of them.” She used that same pleading tone, and it was clear neither one of us was happy about that fact. My chest tightened, but I managed to nod and turn away, shutting the door behind me.
This had to stop now. No more pining after her. No more touching. No more near kisses. All I was doing was hurting her more.