Chapter 9
Chapter Nine
MERRY
I clutch the handkerchief in my hand that Alex gave me during the wedding rehearsal. I was a weeping mess and dread to think what I’ll be like tomorrow during the real thing.
After checking my eye makeup in the ladies, I exit the restroom, walking into the foyer of the Mad Vine restaurant.
Alex steps out of the shadows. A wall of muscle pins me into the corner. “We need to talk.”
“What do you want to talk about?” My heart races as it always does when he’s in this dominant role. His musky scent fills the little space between us. It’s hypnotic, as if getting me high on his pheromones.
His nose trails down my neck as if inhaling my scent, too. I made sure to wear his favourite perfume tonight. The one he always used to buy me. “I want you tonight. But with our son staying over at the house so he doesn’t see the bride before the wedding, how am I gonna sneak you into my bed?”
“Maybe I can sneak you into the pool house.” I pull on his tie. “How’s your back holding out?” A smile quirks my lips.
“Don’t you worry about me.” His lips press against my neck, just below my ear as he whispers against my skin, “How’s that pussy holding out?”
“My pelvic floor’s grateful for the exercise.” My lips curve into a wide smile, my vagina clenching at the mere thought of having him again tonight. I only have four more days with this man, and I want to make them wonderful. If that means sneaking around behind Finn’s back, then so be it. He wouldn’t understand how I can still love his father after all these years, even though I chose not to be with him.
I don’t even understand it, but here we are. I guess I didn’t want Finn growing up feeling second best like I always did. Alex’s first love was always his business.
He’s still kissing my neck, sending tingles through my body. “How much longer do we have to stay at this rehearsal?”
“Well, seeing as you’re paying for it, I think you we have to stay till after dessert at least.”
“I have my own dessert right here.” He nibbles on my ear.
“That tickles.” I wriggle against the wall as more tingles traverse my spine.
He grips my wrists, pinning them against the wood panelling lining the foyer. “I love to see you squirm.”
“Dad?” Finn’s voice booms in the small space. “What the hell are you doing?”
I freeze against the wall. Alex locks eyes with me in the dark corner of the foyer. He doesn’t need to speak, for me to know what he’s thinking. The word fuck is written all over his face.
“Mum?” Finn says.
A prickling lump in my throat prevents me from speaking. A sheen of sweat breaks out on my skin as my inner temperature rises. Trust me to have another tropical right about now.
“Get your hands off my mother.” Finn steps between me and Alex as if he needs to defend my honour. I think I left any virtue I had back in the UK.
“Finn, it’s not what it looks like.” I place my hand on his biceps, his muscles coiled tight as he clenches his fists at his side.
Alex runs a hand over his face. “Son, don’t make a scene.”
“Don’t tell me not to make a scene. You had your grubby hands all over my mother.”
I step from behind Finn, trying to defuse the situation. “Finn?—”
“She was my wife before she was your mother.”
Finn pushes against Alex’s chest, forcing Alex to take a step back. “That doesn’t give you the right to harass her.”
“Finn, that’s enough,” I say in the stern voice I usually save for the House of Commons. “Nobody was harassing anyone.”
Finn’s face screws up as if he’s just taken the red pill and everything’s becoming clear. “You mean that was consensual?”
Alex stands tall with his arms folded across his broad chest, as if waiting for an apology.
“Yes, of course. I wouldn’t let a man get that close to me if I didn’t want them to. Least of all your father.” I actually don’t know if I should be mad at Finn or proud of him.
Finn looks between the two of us. “You know he had a girl at his home this morning?”
I let out a sigh, knowing I’m going to have to come clean about that. It’s not fair to make Alex look like the bad guy.
“No.” Finn shakes his head. His mouth contorts I think he’s about to wretch as if he can spit the red pill back out and take the blue one, forget this ever happened and go back to living his life in blissful ignorance. But there are no pills and he’s going to have to understand that his parents like to have sex too. “That was you, wasn’t it?”
I nod. Heat claws at my neck like flames on a fire, licking at my cheeks. I dab the moisture gathered on my top lip. At this rate, I’ll need to go back into the ladies’ room.
“Why?” Finn asks with wide eyes and a furrowed brow.
“Because I miss him, okay.” I can’t exactly tell my son the truth. I miss having the warmth of a man in my bed, I miss the feeling of tingles in my belly and I miss the way he takes control and makes me submit to him, taking all decisions away from me for a night, when the only thing I have to think about is whether I want his cock in my mouth or my aching vagina. But most of all, I just miss Alex. His intelligence, kindness, and the way he admires me like he’s doing now, gazing at me with his big brown puppy dog eyes.
Finn rubs the side of his temples. “You can’t get back together with him, Mum. He’ll just leave you again like he did before and you’ll end up hurt.”
“Hey. Let’s get one thing straight.” Alex points his finger. “Your mother left me. I never wanted a divorce.”
“Yeah, and it was for a reason. I love you, Dad, but you haven’t changed. You’re still the same man you were twenty years ago, always putting business first.”
“That’s hardly fair. If that was true, there’d be a luxury apartment block under construction right where your wedding marquee’s being erected.”
“I had to beg you to sell me that land.”
“Well, I gave you a good deal, didn’t I?”
“That’s enough, arguing.” I stand between the two of them. “As if your dad’s ever going to make you pay for that land.” I glance at Alex, hoping I’m right. “He’s always been more than generous, so I’ve no doubt that whatever business deal he made, he won’t be chasing payment.”
“Forget the land. I just don’t want to see you get hurt again, Mum.”
I place my hand on Finn’s shoulder. “They don’t call me the Executioner of the Exchequer for nothing. I can handle myself and I can handle your dad. Besides, what makes you think I was hurt before?”
“When you put me to bed, and you thought I was asleep, I used to listen to you cry.” Finn stares into my eyes with a tight jaw, but his eyes are the same sad eyes of that ten-year-old boy who would come and climb into my bed at night, needing comfort. “I wasn’t afraid of the dark, Mum. I just didn’t want you to be alone.”
My heart breaks all over again and I pull Finn into my arms, my head resting on his shoulders, as if he’s still my ten-year-old boy needing comfort, only it’s me that needs comforting, still carrying my tattered heart.
Over Finn’s shoulder, I gaze up at Alex, his eyes filling with emotion like the murky waters in the river Thames, ready to burst its banks.
His palm rests against his chest as if soothing an ache that matches my own. “If I knew you were hurting as much as I was, I would have booked myself on the first flight home. I swear it, Merry.”
Finn turns to his father. “London was never your home, Dad.”
“Home to me, son, was wherever you and your mother were. It just took me a long time to realise that.”
Shelly pops her head in the foyer. “There you are. They’ve brought the desserts out.”
“I’m not hungry,” Finn mumbles as if he’s fifteen again.
Alex and I share a knowing look. “Well, I’m starving,” Alex says as he walks back into the restaurant.
I throw my arm around Finn as we stroll through the double door. “Your father’s many things, but he’s also very kind, caring, and loyal.”
He mumbles again. “Fine. But I don’t have to like it.”
“No, but we are adults and you do have to respect our decision.”
“So, you are getting back together?”
I can’t seem to deny it. The thought has crossed my mind since I’ve been here. I could easily live here. But that would mean giving up my career and everything I love. Maybe I could finish this term and see how the land lies between Alex and I.
It’s not the first time I’ve thought about giving up my career for him and moving halfway across the world, but the feminist inside me stopped me. That voice of reason who’s always making things difficult.
My life would have been so much simpler to submit in all aspects of my life and be a kept woman. It’s many women’s dream to marry a wealthy man, but I had something to prove. I wanted to change the world. It’s only now I realise the people in power don’t want what’s best for our country, they want what’s best for themselves, and maybe my efforts would be better invested in charity work or more conservation efforts like my daughter-in-law.
“Mum? You’re not seriously considering it, are you?”
I shake my head, but can’t speak the words no. If Alex were to ask me to stay, I think there’s a good chance I might say yes. “Your father seems different now. He’s older and more mature.”
Finn groans out, pulling on his short hair. “Don’t say I didn’t warn you.” He stomps back into the restaurant and I follow behind, still thinking about my future in politics.