Chapter 13
Thirteen
Harper
I try to hide my yawn but apparently don’t do a very good job.
“You can go, honey,” Faye says. “We’ve got this.”
This being a fundraiser for the shelter that Bri and Luna work at.
“I’m good,” I say, though I’m seriously dragging.
I catered breakfast for an office event this morning, made a couple of platters of sandwiches for Clara’s lunch meeting and dropped them off, and now I’m here, helping Faye with the shelter’s annual fundraiser.
It’s a breeze.
The shelter has a full commercial kitchen that the kids run under the umbrella of one of my favorite bakeries in the Bay Area, Molly’s.
The menu is slightly stripped down from Molly’s normal locations, but her staff all take turns cycling through, training the teens in skills they can use when they move out on their own or transition beyond state care.
For tonight, Faye and I are overseeing everything.
Faye because she wanted to help and has serious skills in the kitchen (and because she wanted a chance to learn some of Molly’s most coveted recipes).
Me because I have the necessary certifications in food safety.
I pop another ginger candy—still one of the few things my stomach can handle these days—and roll my shoulders. “We’re almost done.”
Her brows drag together. “We have a metric ton of dishes to do. We’re not anywhere close to done.”
Fuck, I forgot about the dishes.
“Eh,” I wave a hand, affecting casualness when all I want to do is cry. Stupid pregnancy hormones. Stupid fatigue. Stupid men who…men. “They’ll go fast.”
“You know,” she says quietly, “you don’t have to do it on your own.”
Don’t I?
Except…that’s not fair. She and Luna and the others have made it clear I’m not alone many times over since they’ve welcomed me into their circle.
I just don’t have the mental energy to think about that right now, mostly because thinking about their circle means thinking about Leo and—
I can’t.
“I know I don’t.” I force a smile. “Yes, I’m tired, but I want to be here, Red,” I say using Gray’s nickname for her. “We’re in the home stretch and I’m going to rot all day tomorrow.”
“Except tomorrow we have that dinner at Luna’s.”
Which I’m catering.
Damn.
I totally forgot.
Probably because I know Luna only asked me so she’d have an excuse to give me some work (we usually go potluck style for our get togethers). It pricked my pride to accept the pity job, but I had taken it.
I need the work.
Need the money.
And maybe I also forgot about the dinner because it’s the first time we’re all meeting Shannon.
Leo’s girlfriend.
I don’t want to think about why that is.
“Amend that to say I’ll rot all day until the dinner,” I say lightly, even though my stomach is churning. “Because I’ve already done most of the prep for it.”
She studies me in that quiet, piercing way of hers, her eyes seeming to silently call me out for the lie.
I’ve prepped exactly zero things for the dinner.
Normally being this tired, I’d say fuck all to my budget and just order pizza or something, but Luna already bought the food. It’s taking up one entire shelf in my walk-in at the shop.
I won’t let it go to waste.
Which means I’ll pull on my big girl pants and make something delicious.
She opens her mouth, but I just nudge the tray I’ve just completed at her.
“You want to take that out so the kids can serve them up? I’ll finish up this last one then bring it out.”
A pause, her brown eyes fixing on mine.
But she doesn’t comment further, just pats my arm, then takes the tray and walks out.
Still, I have the feeling she’s going to be watching me.
Or sending back someone to help me.
Turns out, it’s both.
The moment I walk through the door, Gray swoops in and snags the tray from me. “Off shift, Harp-tastic,” he says, tugging at my ponytail with his free hand.
“Yup. We’ll see you tomorrow,” Smitty declares, looping an arm around my shoulders and guiding me back through the swinging doors…but toward the hooks where I left my purse and jacket and not in the direction of the sink full of dirty dishes.
Because the sink isn’t unoccupied.
Nope.
Leo is standing there, rolling his sleeves up, our eyes connecting across the space.
Heat sparks in my belly, need drifting like slow, lazy fingers up the inside of my thighs.
Then his gaze flicks to Smitty’s arm around me and anger winds itself through the deep brown depths of his eyes.
I’d almost taken a step toward him.
But that flash of anger, the flicker of jealousy has me stopping.
He doesn’t like another man touching me when he threw me away? Never mind that Smitty is happily married and my freaking friend.
I grit my teeth, tear my gaze away.
“Thanks,” I murmur when Smitty pulls away and grabs my jacket, holding it up. He helps me into it then passes me my purse.
“I’ll walk you out.”
“Thanks,” I say again, ignoring the confusing, infuriating man at the sink as I follow Smitty into the parking lot.
But I feel Leo’s gaze burning into me the entire way.
“Yeah, no. That’s not for me.”
I wince from my hiding spot in the kitchen and don’t miss that Kailey’s doing the same from beside me.
Even Smitty, who’s bringing in another load of dishes, is uncharacteristically quiet.
“I’ll get those, little bird,” he says, trying to nudge Kailey away from her position in front of the sink.
“And take away my chance at hiding?” she asks.
His smile is indulgent as he sweeps a hand gently over the small of her back. “You’re feeling okay? Not too tired?”
She lifts on tiptoe, presses a kiss to his bearded jaw. “I’m feeling great. Now get back out there and try to win over Leo’s girlfriend.”
The owner of the snide tone and the Yeah, no. That’s not for me.
“Not sure what he sees in her…” Smitty’s eyes come to mine and I deliberately look down, refocus on packing leftovers.
I’m really good at packing leftovers.
Yup.
Excellent loading.
Precise lid-closing.
Tactical Jenga-stacking in the fridge.
And also, I’m really good at hiding.
From the beautiful, albeit bitchy, woman in the other room.
You’d think for her first time meeting everyone—who are all being their usual welcoming selves—she’d be nicer.
But she’s not…how do I put this kindly?
She’s not…receiving their energy.
In fact, she’s so not receiving their energy that the entire night has been nothing short of a disaster.
“I think she’s just…” Kailey pauses and sighs. “I don’t know what she is. Maybe insecure and compensating? Maybe upset that she and Leo are here with us instead of on a date night or something? Or they could have fought on the way over or—or—”
“She just really hates boardgames?” I supply.
“Exactly,” she says.
I shove the last container in the fridge then brace myself. I’ve drawn out my packing up of the leftovers as much as possible—which means I have nowhere to look except for the ridiculously in love couple standing across from me.
So, I don’t miss the look they exchange.
Don’t miss Smitty running his hand over Kailey’s hair, kissing the top of her head.
Then he shocks the shit out of me by moving over to me and doing the same.
Without another word—which would be unnerving enough without the show of affection—he leaves the kitchen.
Kailey starts up on the dishes again.
“Does he know?”
“About you being pregnant?”
I nod as I take the pot she’s just washed and begin to dry it.
“No,” she says. “We—well Luna decided and we agreed—to keep things just between us. If the guys find out…” She shrugs. “We just figured you didn’t need any extra cooks in the kitchen right now.”
“I hear your pun,” I say as I put the pot away, “and I appreciate it.” I force myself to meet her eyes and smile. “Same as I appreciate you guys all being so nice to me.”
“Ah, Harp.” Her voice is soft. “You have to know it’s not just because we’re being nice.”
I shrug. “Of course not.”
Her hands cover mine, squeeze gently. “You’re awesome and we like you for you. I don’t understand what Leo’s doing, but even Connor”—and God, it’s weird to hear her refer to Smitty by his given name—“doesn’t understand Leo. He always says Leo’s worse than Shrek with all his layers.”
My lips twitch. “That sounds like something Smitty might say.”
She squeezes my hands again. “He might have gone on a tangent about onion layers being easier to bust through the walls Leo puts up.”
I giggle. “Also tracks.”
She grins. “You’re feeling better on the morning sickness front, it seems?”
I nod. “Leo bought me these ginger candies that have helped a lot.”
Something I don’t want to read slides across her face. “That was sweet of him.”
“We had a moment,” I find myself blurting.
Her brows fly up. “Yeah?”
“During the ultrasound,” I whisper. “The doctor played the baby’s heartbeat out loud and—” My throat goes tight, eyes tearing up.
“And it was beautiful,” Kailey murmurs.
“Yes. Our eyes locked and held and it was like…I don’t know…”
“Like just the two of you in the entire universe?”
“Yeah,” I whisper. “Well, like the three of us.” Shannon laughs from the next room and I exhale, blink rapidly.
Because there are literally three of us involved in this.
“Stupid pregnancy hormones,” I say lightly as I wave a hand in front of my face.
“Anyway, I should get out of here. I have an early morning.”
She’s quiet for a moment.
But she’s Kailey—sweet, through and through.
So, she just loops her arm through mine and starts leading me from the room. “Let’s get you out of here.”
“Dessert is in the freezer,” I tell her. “Those ice cream sandwiches you’ve been craving.”
She pauses at the coat rack and pulls me into a hug. Then she leans back and cups both of my cheeks in her palms, her eyes full of emotion. “That’s why we love you, honey.”
I blink. “No fair.”
Her mouth quirks. “Pregnancy hormones are no joke.” But thankfully, she doesn’t dish me any more sweet, just lets me slip out the front door without anyone noticing.
Or that’s what I think as I hurry through the warm summer air toward my car.
“Harp.”
I freeze with the driver’s side door partly open and turn to watch Leo walking my way.
God, he’s beautiful.
Graceful and strong, his stride displaying a confidence that makes it clear he knows exactly how to use every part of his body.
Something I can vouch for.
My stomach flutters, but I ignore it…and the desire pooling between my legs.
Been there, done that.
Got the signature brush off.
“Hey,” he says as he gets closer, his eyes searching my face in a way that has me wanting to fix my no doubt messy ponytail. “You look like you feel better.”
I nod. “I’m fine.”
His brows drag together. “What’s the matter?”
“Nothing.”
Only that you were staring at Smitty yesterday like you wanted to crush him for giving me a hug and tonight you’ve barely looked at me because you’re here with your girlfriend?
“Harp—”
“Thanks for the ginger candies. They’re helping a lot.” I bite the inside of my cheek, shove down my anger. I know the score, and this is fine, it’s all fine. “I appreciate you dropping them by.” A beat. “And the food too. You didn’t have to do that.”
Not having to buy groceries—and also not going through the ones I already have all that quickly (because I can’t eat much)—meant I was able to make an extra payment on my mom’s loans this month.
He shrugs. “It’s my kid too.”
Fuck, why does that hurt?
“Right,” I whisper, but I don’t say anything else, just wait for him to explain why he stopped me from leaving.
But all he does is stare at me.
And a woman can only take so much.
“I need to go—”
He reaches into his pocket, pulls out a plastic bag. “I won’t keep you. I just…wanted to give you this.”
My brows drag together as I take it, peek inside—
And then feel my damned heart squeeze again.
“It’s adorable,” I whisper, unfolding the Grizzlies onesie that both seems too big—because the baby is only the size of a strawberry—and too tiny—do humans even come that small?
—at the same time. “Thank you. Though”—my lips twitch—“we have three teams in the area, are you sure she’s going to be a Grizzlies’ fan? ”
His eyes dance. “Pretty sure, yeah.”
I giggle. “Confident, much?”
“That my baby is going to root for the Grizzlies? Yeah”—he grins—“I am.” He tugs lightly at my ponytail, asks softly, “You think we’re having a little girl?”
“I don’t know for sure, obviously.” I shrug. “I just…”
“Have a feeling?”
His question is so gentle, his eyes so warm that my body drifts towards his.
“I think—” he begins.
“Leo, are we going or what?” Shannon shouts from the porch.
We both snap apart and I quickly climb into the driver’s seat as he tells her he’ll be right there.
I’m an idiot.
An emotional, pregnant idiot.
I start to pull the door closed but he catches it, crouching down to meet my eyes and eviscerating me with another gentle question, “You’ll be okay getting home?”
I’m okay. I always am.
I have to be.
“Yup.” I tug at the door.
“Harp,” he begins softly, holding it open.
“Does she know?”
His eyes slide away. “No,” he admits and the tendril of yearning twining inside me dies a little, flecking away to ash.
God, Harp. Dramatic, much?
“I should go,” I say, turning away and staring out the windshield.
His voice softens even further. “I haven’t seen Shannon much lately.”
“Right,” I whisper.
“I—things are…busy.” He exhales. “And complicated.”
“Yeah, of course—”
“Leo!”
My eyes flick to Shannon storming down the driveway. “You need to go.”
“Harper—”
I tug at the door, harder this time, and thankfully, he releases it.
Likely because Shannon is getting closer, and her expression is distinctly unhappy.
I don’t worry about that.
Liar.
Okay, so I don’t worry about what it might mean for Leo.
Also…liar.
Whatever.
I turn on my car, carefully pull away from the curb…
And I run away.
Now that’s the truth.