36. Jordan
Chapter thirty-six
The green-haired Alpha quickly switches from sitting to kneeling. I don't have to ask him twice. I take a step towards him, and he reaches out to touch me but drops his hand quickly before he makes contact.
"Can I touch you?" he asks softly.
"You may." He drags his hands up my bare legs, fingers ghosting over my skin so lightly I worry I'm imagining it. I feed my fingers into his shaggy hair and pull back, tilting his face to me. His hazel eyes are hooded with desire and reverence.
"Are you comfortable with this?" I don't want to force this on him just because he said he'd beg me, but part of me thinks I need this. I need to regain control, to take it back from them. They had the power to end our relationship, and they did.
But now it's in my hands to rekindle.
"Abso-fucking-lutely," he chuckles.
It's all the permission I need. I lean down and press my lips against his, inhaling the rich, malted chocolate scent that he exudes.
I have wanted to kiss Simon Stargazer for a very, very long time. I always wondered why we never took that step when we were younger, but now that we're here and I can feel every bit of emotion he's pouring into me, I don't find myself mourning an awkward kiss between young lovers.
I tighten my grip on his hair, and he gasps, mouth opening for me as I swallow the sound and slip my tongue between his lips. His tattooed hands drag up my legs, across my ass, and grip around my hips, awkwardly pulling me forward and causing me to stumble.
It's an effort to pull my mouth from his, but I do, stepping backward to catch my breath. Simon's chest heaves, his eyes smoldering as he looks at me.
"Jordan," he murmurs, "please." He reaches for my hand, and I move forward slowly and let him take it, dropping to my knees before him.
I cup his cheek and then let my hands drag down his chest before stopping and flicking his nipple rings. He groans and pushes his chest out to give me easier access. I lean down and trace the silver hoop with my tongue before licking and kissing up to his collarbones.
My mouth hovers on the pale spot of flesh that he saved for me. A choice he made after an offhand comment when we were teenagers. I nip the blank space lightly, not enough to break the skin but enough to make Simon inhale sharply.
"Don't tease me, peaches." His voice is thick with emotion, and I don't want to name it because I may find myself lost to him if I do. "Don't do that unless you mean it."
That's the thing.
I don't know if I mean it.
If someone asked me outright, I would say I don't. I would say I am toying with Simon as a way of punishing him for what he put me through.
But I don't know if I believe that anymore.
Since he threw himself back into my life, Simon has made it clear that he only wants me. He's shown me time and time again that he knows he messed up and will do whatever it takes to have me.
Even if it was a little creepy and stalker-ish.
I grab the bottom of my tank and pull it off, my eyes never leaving Simon's. Watching them widen with shock and excitement is a heady, powerful feeling. His hands brush delicately up my sides, stopping before he can palm my breasts.
"Can I?"
The thing about Simon asking is that I know he wouldn't if I said no. He wouldn't pout or make me feel guilty like Henrik used to. He'd back off and not say another word about it.
"You can," I whisper, resting my arms behind me to push my breasts into the air. The second the words leave my mouth, he's rolling my nipples between his fingers, rubbing and kneading my soft flesh.
"Pants off," I command. He immediately stops what he's doing and strips down to a pair of tight, red boxer briefs. I can see his cock straining against the front already, and I fight back a whine at the sight.
He kneels back in front of me, and I press my lips to his. "Good boy," I mutter against his lips.
"Oh, fuck," he says in a breathy tone. "Why is that so hot?"
He is an expanse of flesh before me that I ache to explore, and I am tired of holding myself back. With a quick shove, I push him to his back. He bounces on the soft surface of my nest, and as I lord over him, I think of all the ways I can make him beg for my forgiveness.
No time like the present.
I hook my fingers in the elastic of my shorts and push them off, taking my panties with them.
"Fuck, fuck, fuck," he chants, trying to sit up. I place my foot on his sternum to keep him down. "Please, Jordan, I need to touch you. I need to taste you."
Slick pools between my thighs, and I'm sure it glistens on my skin, a result of the overwhelming need I feel for him. His fingers trace my legs, but he doesn't get far.
As I look down at my green-haired Alpha, a wicked smile curls on my face. "What is it you want, Simon?" I coo. "Tell me what you want."
"I want to worship you," he says breathlessly. "I want to speak promises and love into your flesh. I want to taste your desire and meet it with my own. I want to join our bodies together so you can see how seamlessly we fit together. I want to trace every inch of you with my tongue, leaving no part of you wondering if I am yours forever."
My breath catches in my throat, and it's an effort to ask, "And what do you need?"
"I need your forgiveness. I need your love." His eyes drift closed to hide the glimmer of tears, but one slips out of the corner. "Peaches, I will never be worthy of you, but I am selfish enough to pretend I am. I need you, Jordan."
His words crack the glass enclosure I built around my heart.
I'm done fighting. Done holding onto this anger and resentment.
"You can have me, Simon," I say, slipping down to my knees and pulling his face up with my hands. "I've been yours since the beginning."
This time, when we kiss, it is slow and passionate, a gentle caress of our mouths that says more than words ever could.
It's not long before Simon's hands grip my hips, pulling me on top of him. My legs fall to either side of him, and my bare core rests atop his hard length, the thin fabric of his underwear all that is keeping our skin apart.
He pulls my hips forward and then pushes them back, rocking and grinding me against his cock as we kiss. My eyes roll behind my eyelids at the sensation, and I break my lips from his.
"Fuck me, Simon," I pant.
"Not yet," he replies, gripping my hips harder. "I haven't appropriately apologized yet." He lifts me swiftly and pulls me over his face. I balance precariously on my knees, looking down at his lecherous grin. "Sit, Jordan. A queen deserves a throne."
Oh, fuck.
He doesn't need to ask me twice.
I drop down onto his lips, his nose immediately pushing up against my clit, and my hips immediately rock into his touch. He flattens his tongue and laps me up, a groan shaking his chest when he tastes me for the first time. Simon grips my ass, his fingertips digging in so tightly I'm sure the bruises left behind could be used to unlock his phone.
His tongue spears into me as I rotate my hips slowly, using his strong nose to chase my pleasure. My fingers find my nipples and pinch and pull, but I still feel like something is missing.
When the realization hits me, I reluctantly wrench myself away from Simon long enough to turn around before sitting on his face again and bending at the waist.
My hands grapple at his hips, and he wiggles them in an attempt to help me pull down the boxer briefs enough to free his dick. When I finally get it in my hands, my eyes widen.
"A piercing?" My voice is half wonder, half fear at the thick silver ring that is hooked through the head of his cock.
He chuckles against me, lifting me slightly so he can answer. "I promise, you're gonna love it." And then he roughly pulls me back down, continuing to feast on my flesh with the ferocity of a man starved. Heat coils inside me, pleasure building with his every move.
Through the bond, I feel vague amusement drift down from Icarus. I know I didn't need his approval, but now that it seems I have it, a piece of me that I was unintentionally holding back loosens.
I take Simon into my mouth, my tongue tracing along the flesh that is pierced by the ring, and he uses my pussy to stifle his moans. I suck him down my throat, bobbing my head in time with the strokes of his tongue, the two of us a circuit of carnal pleasure as we urge one another towards release.
Simon pulls one hand from my ass and slips two fingers inside my soaked cunt, and my jaw drops around his cock as I gasp in pleasure. A slight adjustment has my clit between his teeth as he curls his fingers inside me.
My orgasm comes on so swiftly it takes me by surprise, and my body quivers and shakes on top of the Alpha, my mouth warming his cock loosely.
He gently lifts me, laying me on my back, before resting a hand on either side of my head and leaning over me with lust lighting up his eyes. "Have I earned your forgiveness, Jordan?"
"Of course, Simon, I-"
"No," he interrupts. "I don't think I have. Perhaps…" He clicks his tongue as if he's thinking hard. "I think I know what else I need to do to earn it." He drops his lips to my ear, his breath warm and my body tensing with anticipation. "I think letting you be the first and only person to take my knot should be enough, right?" He nips the tender flesh of my lobe as my mind struggles to catch up.
"You haven't knotted anyone?" I ask breathily. "Have you not slept with anyone?"
"I have," he admits sheepishly. "But not that many. And…," he pauses as he runs his fingers through his shaggy hair, "I wanted to save something for you, my Omega."
Leaning up, I press my lips to his before wrapping my arms around his neck and pulling him on top of me. His cock rests between my thighs, and the heat from it has a whine escaping my throat unbidden.
"Please, Simon," I whimper, but he silences me with a kiss.
"You will not beg, Jordan. I will always give you what you ask for."
His hips move, and then his cock pushes against my entrance, that ring cooler than the flesh around it as it slips inside me. I stretch around him for a few moments before he starts to slowly piston his hips.
"Oh, fuck!" I say, my eyes wide.
He chuckles, dragging his cock in and out of me at a brutally slow pace. "You like the ring, then?"
Did I like the ring? The jewelry that is stroking the most sensitive part inside me with every movement?
"If I liked it anymore, I'd think you were proposing with it." My voice is breathy, catching every other word as he thrusts into me.
I can't look away from his face, the rapture in every line of it making my soul sing. This feels right. There is no denying that we were always supposed to find ourselves in each other's arms.
Eventually, as Simon's pace quickens, his eyes get wild, and low growls rip from his throat, I know he's fallen into a rut. I luxuriate in the sensations, feeling the pleasure build at the base of my neck and drip through my body, a slow build of sensations that threaten to overflow at any moment.
My Alpha leans down and captures my nipple in his mouth, biting with just enough pressure to have me calling out. One hand drifts between our bodies and seeks out my clit, gently rubbing circles into it as his hips continue to thrust their brutal pace.
That added sensation has my vision whiting out and his name tumbling from my lips as an orgasm escapes me and my body thrashes under his.
"Shh, shh," he whispers against my lips. "There's my girl. Let it all out. Don't hold back for me now." His words work in tandem with his cock and hand to prolong my ecstasy, and I feel myself clench around him repeatedly, eventually taking him over the edge with me.
The heat of his release fills me, and I feel his knot begin to expand, stretching me to limits I didn't know I could reach. He pulls me with him as he collapses to the base of the nest, laying on his side and bracketing his body around mine.
When I look up at his face, I'm shocked to see a few tears leak from the corners of his eyes.
"Simon, what's wrong?" I ask as I wipe them away.
"When I first got glasses, I was blown away by the detail of everything. Trees weren't blobs of green—there were leaves. The colors in rainbows were layered. I could see the stitching in the blanket Momma Lucy made me." His hand drags down my hair and then settles on my neck, gently kneading the flesh. "When I lost you, it was like my glasses had been ripped away. Everything was muted. Nothing was as it was before. For thirteen years, I wandered around, unable to see and experience the world."
Emotion chokes his voice, and I feel the heat of tears sliding down my face.
"I feel like I can see again, Jordan."
We lay there, tangled in each other's arms, for longer than it takes for his knot to deflate. We stay there past dinner and through the night, eventually falling asleep wrapped around one another after Simon insists he still needs to atone for his sins at the altar between my thighs.
Several times.