44. Jordan
Chapter forty-four
After recounting the story I just told Simon and Rafe, Dr. Carr flicks through his tablet with a frustrated expression.
"What is it?" I ask quietly. Cyrus and Vick are standing frozen behind the doctor.
Vick looks worse for wear. His hair is all over the place, his skin sallow, and there is a twitch in his left eye I've never seen before. He looks like he's hanging on by a thread. When my eyes clash with his emerald ones, I push as many soothing emotions as possible down the bond, watching his shoulders relax a fraction.
Reaching out to my Alpha, I urge him to sit with me. Cyrus follows like a duckling, and then all five of us are piled on this small hospital bed.
"How long ago did you wake up?" He asks.
"About five minutes," Rafe answers.
"You were down about three hours, Jordan," the doctor says gently. "That's a dangerous amount of time to be in Omega drop. During that time, your cortisol levels are elevated, adrenaline runs rampant in your body, keeping you in drop, and your blood sugar stays at a critical level. I am concerned about the potential for kidney damage and the effects on your reproduction system."
My stomach bottoms out, and I grip the closest hands to me. Cyrus and Vick squeeze mine in response, settling me.
"My reproductive system? This could hurt my chances of having kids?" Though my words were quiet, I feel every Alpha around me stiffen at them. We've never really talked about kids as a group, considering we're barely a group, but it's something I need to know will be an option one day.
"No, nothing that serious," he insists. "You can expect your heats to be erratic for a few cycles. Maybe early, maybe late, perhaps several small ones. There isn't much research on Omega drop because the medical industry has neglected Omega physiology historically, but I've seen it a few times in my years."
"We can handle irregular heats," Icarus says gently. His grip tightens on mine. "But we need to run some tests on her kidney function."
"Of course, Russ. I'm a good doctor, you know. I wouldn't let your Omega leave without a clean bill of health." He taps his tablet a few times before tucking it under his arm. "I'm going to need a urine sample, and then Nurse West will be here to get a blood sample."
He stops in the doorway on his way out, looking back at all of us. "You did good, Alphas. If she had been in drop on her own, I would be very concerned about the prognosis. Sometimes, our bodies have wonderful protective measures in place, and Russ' Alpha guard and the rest of you protecting them both staved off the more severe consequences. I'll be back when your results are ready."
I attempt to heave myself out of bed, and a wall of sticky, sweet blackberry Alpha blocks me. "No. You need rest." Cyrus' words are sharp and clipped, and their aggression is entirely inappropriate for the situation.
"I have to go piss in a cup, Cyrus. Out of my way." I attempt to step around him, but he squares his shoulders more, planting his legs wide, trapping me between the bed and the wall.
"No," he snaps. "You were hurt. You need to lie down and let us take care of you."
I know it's Cyrus in front of me, but my mind is playing tricks on me, flickering the image of Mr. Woods over the handsome face of the Alpha I've known since childhood. My breath starts coming in sharp pants, and my hands tremble. My knees begin to buckle, and I whine, slipping down the wall.
"Fuck, wait, Jordan," Cyrus barks. I flinch back as he reaches for me, the whine growing even louder as my vision starts to spot on the sides. Strong arms wrap around the back of my knees, and Cyrus buries my face in the curve of his neck. I inhale deeply, his scent twisting through me and putting out the fire of anxiety that had risen.
"I'm so sorry, Jordan," he whispers. "I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to scare you. I was so fucking worried, and I just want to wrap you up in bubble wrap and hide you away. I'm not thinking clearly."
"S'okay," I mutter into his flesh. My mouth aches as it presses against his skin, that little voice that I now know is my Omega nature urging me to bite down on the delicious-smelling Alpha.
"It's not, but I appreciate you giving me the benefit of the doubt." He jostles me a little in his arms, and I wince as bright can lighting assaults my eyes. A bit of rattling later, Cyrus gently sets me on the floor, pushing down my slacks and placing me on the toilet.
My face lights up like a Christmas tree as I squeal. "Why are you putting me on the toilet?"
"They need a urine sample."
"I know that! Why are you in here with me?" I squirm uncomfortably, just now realizing how badly I do have to pee but unwilling to cross that boundary with Cyrus.
We haven't even slept together yet. There is no way he needs to hear what I sound like when I pee before what I sound like when I come.
"Pee, Jordan. I set up the little plastic thing that collects it so you don't have to hold a cup." He leans against the open doorframe, where I can see my other three Alphas trying and failing to keep straight faces.
"Cyrus, leave. Let me pee in peace."
He crosses his tree-trunk arms over his broad chest and narrows his honey-brown eyes at me. "No. I'm sorry, but no. You're my Omega, and I didn't know how serious drop was until now. I… can't, Jordan." His eyes squeeze shut as he inhales sharply. "Please don't make me close a door between us."
Call me crazy, but I don't think that this has anything to do with my urine.
"Okay," I concede. "Can you not stare me down, though? I don't need to feel like I'm trying to assert dominance while I piss."
He rolls his eyes before turning his back to me. "Omega. Pee."
"Yes, Daddy," I mutter. His head whips to the side as he looks at me over his shoulder, a shocking amount of heat smoldering in his gaze.
"Quit being a brat and pee, Jordan. Final warning."
Once he's firmly facing away from me, I finally listen, my face red with embarrassment, knowing he was listening the whole time. Before I have a chance to get up to wash my hands, he hoists me up and pulls my slacks back up before washing my hands for me.
"What is going on, Cyrus? I can wash my hands without dying."
"Fuck, woman, let me take care of you!" His words come out in a frustrated growl. "I felt helpless when you were in drop. Icarus was in guard, and Rafe was calming him down. Simon got punched in the face and had that to distract him, but I was just there, watching you not wake up." He gently dries my hands with the horrendous paper towels in the hospital bathroom and meets my eyes in the mirror.
"Can you just let me have this? I need to feel like you need me, Jordan."
The words are so vulnerable and quiet that it takes a moment for my brain to process them. When the meaning finally hits, it takes the words out of my throat. I nod numbly, and his body seems to deflate as he scoops me up into his arms, nuzzling into my neck as he carries me gently back to the bed.
The bed is larger than a standard one since this is the Omega ward, but these four Alphas are not small, so we soon abandon all hope that the five of us can comfortably exist together in the bed, and I end up curled up on Cyrus' chest.
I can't help replaying the tiny bit of conversation I overheard between Rafe and Simon in my head. I should've made it known that I was awake instead of listening in on their vulnerable words, but I couldn't help myself. There was so much pain in Rafe's voice that it made me ache.
I don't know if Simon feels the same way, but I sincerely hope he doesn't let me hold him back if he does.
But I'm not going to insert myself into their relationship. If they want my input, I'll provide it, but I will keep myself out of it until then.
Nurse West comes in and takes my blood as well as collects my urine sample from the bathroom. She's the same woman I met when I first presented as an Omega, and though she is gruff and abrasive, I like her. She's got gentle hands, and I barely noticed the needle going in to take my blood.
I drift in and out of sleep, a soft purr constant from Cyrus beneath me.
"It's been about six weeks since her heat," I hear Icarus saying at one point when I'm half-conscious. "It was tough last time."
"How so?" Rafe's analytical voice asks from somewhere behind me.
"It was over six days. I barely ate, she was so needy. I wasn't enough for her." My sweet Alpha's voice shakes, and I can feel the sharp shame radiating from him. "I'd get her fed, and then she'd be back begging for my knot. I had to leave her crying and in pain a few times to keep myself from passing out."
"Is that why you asked if any of us were together sexually at the pack party?" Simon asks quietly.
Well, that's news to me. I didn't realize Icarus had broached this topic with them. I wonder what the guys told him?
"Yeah," he admits quietly. "I theorize that her delayed presentation will make her heats more intense and require a higher pheromone exposure than standard. With just a low level of pheromones from me, her body took a long time to absorb enough to satisfy the heat. It was as much of a curiosity about your dynamics as I was seeking the knowledge to better predict what will happen during her next heat."
I didn't realize how bad it was for him. He'd told me it was tough, but he didn't go into detail about it. I know that I'm not to blame for it, not really, but I still feel so much guilt that he was run so ragged.
For the second time today, I am a voyeur of a conversation I wasn't supposed to be a part of.
"Do you think she'll want us to help for the next heat?" Simon asks from somewhere near my feet.
"You, for sure," Cyrus whispers underneath me. "Doubtful for me."
"I can't say for certain," Icarus responds, and I feel the bed shift beside me. "But I will need help, so we'll have to ask her."
Nope. No. Do not ask me.
I cannot answer this question. Not right now.
How do I make myself seem more asleep? I try to make my body heavier, slowing my breathing even more.
"Not anytime soon," Rafe says quietly. "She doesn't need to be stressed out by that right now."
The other Alphas make sounds of agreement, eventually switching to inconsequential discussions about chores and their jobs.
I drift back into a gentle sleep.
What could be minutes or hours later, I jolt awake as Cyrus slides out from underneath me, and Icarus takes his spot.
"Vick," I sigh, snuggling into him and letting the refreshing calm of his eucalyptus and cucumber scent flow through me. "Heard you had a tough day."
"Been better." His voice is rough, but his hands are gentle as he drags them down my arms. "But I'm good. Better than Slime's nose."
"Hey!" the green-haired Alpha yelps, looking up from his phone. "They set it, and it's already half healed. I'm fine." It's only now that I let myself notice the purple under his eyes and the slight swelling on his face. I wrinkle my nose and let out a soft whine at the sight of it, wincing.
Where is the whining coming from? Why is this happening more lately? I clear my throat as if to rid myself of the vulnerable sound.
As if reading my mind, Vick leans down and whispers, "You're basically going through puberty again, Jordan. Your Omega traits may end up all over the place."
"Don't like this one bit," I mutter.
He pulls me tighter against him, humming as he does. "I think it's cute."
"Me too!" Simon pipes up, striding across the room. "Especially because you're worried about me." He places a gentle kiss on my forehead.
Rafe and Cyrus are stretched out on the couch in the room, watching on with soft smiles, and for once, I feel completely at ease.
I've been fighting it. And I know part of me will fight until my heart learns it's safe.
But this is my pack.
It always has been.