58. Jordan
Chapter fifty-eight
"You've made my mom's life complete," Athena says before she takes a long sip of her bellini. "Seriously, letting her throw this bonding ceremony has been all she's talked about for the past two months."
After bonding with the Stargazers, Icarus could no longer hold off his mother's feral desire to throw a massive party celebrating our blended pack.
"Hey, I'm not complaining at all," I say, smoothing the white dress as I stare at my reflection. "I never imagined I'd get to have one, so this is a dream come true."
The white satin dress falls to the floor, clinging to my hips and flaring out under my knees. The thin crystal straps have their work cut out of them, and the neckline falls in a cowl that lets the tops of my breasts peek out just a little. The back dips low, and with my hair up in an intricate, twisting updo, all four of my bonding marks are on display.
It's simple, elegant, and everything I could have dreamed of.
"You look so gorgeous," my best friend sighs, resting her chin on my shoulder.
With everything that has happened since I met Icarus, one of the things I am most grateful for is how my relationship with Athena has grown.
I place my hand over hers, avoiding the dangerously sharp black nails she's wearing today, and lean my head against hers. Her emerald green, one-shouldered dress matches her eyes. It stops just below her knees, showing off the strappy gold pumps she picked out.
"So do you, sister." Her beaming smile lights up the room as I turn back to the mirror, running my hands over the front of my dress. "I know I already have the bonding marks, but this feels like a big deal," I admit.
"That's because it is."
Our heads whip around to see Momma Valentine standing in the doorway. The older Beta woman has beautiful white hair that hangs in waves on her shoulders, the same emerald eyes Athena and Icarus have, and the friendliest smile. Her face is lined with a history of laughter and love, and from the moment I met her, she's made me feel comfortable and like a part of the family.
"You're so beautiful, Jordan," she says, rushing forward and grabbing my hands. "I thank the universe every day that my Icarus met you."
"He changed my life," I tell her honestly. "I'm not sure where I would be right now without him."
She sighs and brushes a strand of hair off my face. "And you've got those other boys … wow, you sure enough did collect the full gauntlet of Alphas, didn't you? I felt like I was in a candy store." She giggles as Athena's jaw drops.
"Mom!"
"What? You have the tattooed bad boy, the tall, dark, and handsome one, the buff and grumpy one, and the handsome doctor. It's like Jordan opened up the Alpha catalog and picked one from each category!"
My face heats, and I have to hide a chuckle at how very much Simon is not a bad boy, but she's not wrong. My four men are all quite different, but when we're all together, it's clear how well we fit.
"What can I say? I'm greedy." I wink, and she giggles loudly. "Is everyone ready?" I spin back around and stare at my reflection one more time.
"Are you ready?" Athena asks softly.
Am I ready?
That's the question, isn't it?
Luckily for me, it's the easiest one in the world.
"I've been ready for a long time."
"Then let's go," Momma Valentine says, looping her arm around mine. "Are you sure you're okay with me walking you?"
Athena grabs my other arm. "And me?"
Usually, an Omega's parents would walk her to the Alphas for a bonding ceremony, but I haven't spoken to my parents in years. I could walk alone, but I have spent a very long time doing things alone, and I am not alone anymore.
Why not lean on two women who have taken me into their family so wholly from the moment they met me?
As we walk out of the pool house on Icarus's parent's property, I nearly trip as I gasp. The yard has been transformed. Gold chairs are lined on either side of a white walkway, with bundles of flowers attached to each chair. Stargazer lilies stand prominent in the middle of each bouquet, surrounded by pink and maroon flowers in an homage to the basket Rafe sent me.
Wooden trellises have been built arching over the aisle and draped the gauzy pink material. Walking down the aisle, I look over at the people gathered.
Momma Fran beams at me in a smart gray pantsuit, sitting next to a massive, bearded man covered in faded tattoos. He's wearing a motorcycle cut, and I realize that this has to be Nitro, Simon's surrogate father. Momma Fran gives me a half-wave and blows me a kiss. I haven't seen her in years, but I feel like a teenager again with just one look at her. I can't wait to hug her tightly.
My friend Nora holds a tiny baby with dark black hair to her chest as she feeds him. Her bright blue eyes look tired but happy. Nolan Sloane sits on her left, and I recognize a few of the guys from brief meetings over the past two months. The massive, bearded one, Joey, I believe, keeps glancing behind him at Nitro.
Rafe's parents are on the other side of the aisle, and all five of his fathers cluster around his mother. She's tiny, with long dark hair and deep brown skin, and wearing a pretty yellow gown. Growing up, his fathers showed me how wonderfully an Omega should be treated by her pack. When they smile at me, tears build up in my eyes.
Cyrus's parents aren't here. Like me, he's been out of contact with them for years. But his cohost from Sin Bin, Quinn, is here with his pack, their Omega, Jason, leaning into his side. The smaller man wears a black suit with a bright red tie and waves at me excitedly. We've met a few times, and he's quickly becoming a good friend.
But what awaits me at the end of the aisle stops my breath.
My men stand side by side, and none of them have taken their eyes off me. I've avoided looking at them until now, wanting to take in the people who have come to support us and the beautiful decorations, and now I can't look away.
Rafe stands on the end in a solid black suit with a black shirt and a deep maroon tie. His gold cufflinks and tie bar flash in the early evening sun. He's started keeping his hair longer, and the tight curls have been styled perfectly. From this far away, I can't see the nuance of his deep brown eyes, but the corners are creased from his broad smile.
Beside him, Simon's back is rigid, his hands clasped in front as he worries his fingers. He looks slightly uncomfortable in his light gray suit, and I have to admit I hate that it covers up the masterpieces that adorn his skin. But the way it stretches across his shoulders and skims his thighs makes my mouth want to water. His bright green hair is freshly dyed and slicked back into an understated pompadour, and he's forgone the tie to leave the top few buttons of his suit undone, giving me just a glimpse at the edge of my bite on his clavicle.
Icarus looks at me with so much love it nearly buckles my knees. His charcoal suit, white shirt, and pink tie are perfectly tailored, and his hair has been shorn short on the sides with the top slicked back. His deep emerald green eyes are fixed on me, and when he knows he's caught my gaze, he mouths, "I love you."
Finally, I lock eyes with Cyrus. My stubborn, grumpy Alpha looks like he's about to bust out of his navy blue suit. His curly brown hair is down, skimming his shoulders, and the sun reflects strands of gold woven in the dark locks. He's not smiling, and his throat bobs as he swallows. It takes a moment for me to place it as nerves.
I think part of Cyrus still feels like I don't fully forgive him for everything, but that couldn't be farther from the truth.
I understand why they did what they did. I don't like how they went about it, and the hurt it caused was very real, but in their minds, they were putting me and my happiness first.
When I spoke to Momma Valentine about it, and she told me about Athena's experience from her perspective as a mother, my heart broke for my sister-in-law all over again. It wasn't until then that I realized I was still holding onto some anger, even though we'd all already bonded.
After that conversation, I let it all go.
Athena and Momma Valentine kiss my cheeks, and Icarus and Simon each grab one of my hands.
"You look incredible, peaches," Simon says, nuzzling his cheek against mine. "Like an angel."
"You all clean up very nicely," I respond, looking at each of them. "I mean, we should just get out of here because those suits…"
"Jay," Cyrus warns. He jerks his head towards the crowd gathered, who laugh as they watch us. My face flushes red, and I try to duck behind Icarus.
"Absolutely not, sunshine," he chuckles, pulling me back between him and Simon.
We chose not to have an officiant for our bonding. The guys told me they wanted to handle it themselves, and since they had little opinion about anything else, I decided to go along for the ride.
Icarus clears his throat. "Family and friends, thanks for being here. So many of you know Jordan's story and the role the four of us play in it, so I won't rehash that today."
"Thank God," I mutter.
He shoots me a chastising glance, and I cover my words with a cough.
"We thought instead, we'd each tell you a little bit about our relationship with Jordan Cross," he continues.
Simon steps back, and Rafe takes his place, taking my hands and turning me towards him. "Jordy, there are so many memories of mine that you are the star of. But now that we're here, with our lives tied together forever, one stands out more than the rest."
He's barely begun speaking, and my throat already feels thick with tears.
What was the point of me doing my makeup today?
"I was sixteen years old and had just come into my designation. I was the first of us, and I felt out of control. So many fears spun around in my head. What if the guys weren't Alphas? What if we weren't a pack? What if you weren't my Omega?"
I clutch a hand to my chest, fighting hard to keep my tears in. I remember how distant Rafe was until the guys presented. How hard it was to get him to come hang out.
"You were so pissed that I was hiding out that you came over to the house, banging on my door, demanding I come see you. Of course, my mom was not a fan of the racket." We both look at her, and she blushes, ducking her head. Many people laugh. "And you told her you weren't leaving until you spoke to me."
I remember that day. He never actually came out to talk to me. Eventually, his mother turned me away, telling me he wasn't feeling good and he'd see me at school.
I went home and cried, convinced I was losing my friend.
"When you left, my mom slammed open the door to my room and tore into me. She told me that I would ruin my friendships over the specter of a maybe. I wish I could say I followed her advice for the rest of my life, but we both know I didn't." He cups my face in one hand, pressing his forehead to mine. "When I think of our relationship, I think of that day. The day I realized that you would never let me go."
He pulls me in for a sweet, tender kiss, our tears mingling with each other's. "Thank you," he says softly, only for me to hear. "All those years, and you never really let me go."
"And I never will."
He kisses me again before spinning me into Cyrus's arms.
Cyrus stares at me intensely, holding my face in his massive hands. "Jay, you are infuriating."
I choke on a laugh, and many of our gathered loved ones gasp quietly. He shakes his head before dropping my face to run his fingers through his hair. "I mean it. You are so bullheaded sometimes it's hard to have a conversation with you."
"You're one to talk, Stargazer." I push my fists into my hips.
"Oh, I am aware I am no better. Sometimes, it's like us being in the same room is a powder keg. It's always been that way. I'm sure there are quite a few people here today who are full of stories of Cyrus and Jordan screaming at each other in their backyard."
"I've got a few!" Momma Fran shouts from the audience. Cyrus points directly at her.
"See! We've always been each other's biggest challenger. And to some people, that may not make sense for a romantic relationship. But for us? I mean, could you imagine it any other way?"
"I couldn't," I say, stroking his cheekbone.
"I think it's part of what makes us so perfect for one another. We won't let each other get away with anything. And the moment I forced you out of my life, I lost that. I didn't realize how much I needed you there pushing me, challenging me." He takes both of my hands in his, and when he looks at me with eyes full of love and devotion, my breath catches in my throat.
"We will disagree, argue, and fight for the rest of our lives. You will tell me when I'm being pig-headed, and I will show you when you're being stubborn. But I promise you one thing, Jordan. I will love you more every single time you tell me I'm wrong. Which I am sure will happen a lot. All I ask in return is that you love me, too. That you never let yourself forget for one day that you are my reason for being."
"I love you, you big oaf," I sob, pulling his lips to mine. "Even when you're stupid. Even when you tell me I'm wrong."
He kisses me so deeply I nearly bend over backward before handing me off to Icarus. My doctor Alpha brushes my hair from my face, smiling so softly it almost hurts.
"Vick," I say with a sigh.
"Vick," he scoffs, shaking his head. "Icarus Valentine became Vick in your mind, and I have been Vick since. It's a great example of how much knowing you has rewritten my very being, Jordan."
Trying to stop my tears at this point is pointless, and Icarus must know that because he hands me a pale pink handkerchief before continuing.
"Being an Alpha was never something I cared for, if I'm honest. When I realized a pack bond wouldn't happen for me, I gave up hope for an Omega. And I was happy. Or, rather, I lived in a facsimile of happiness. I have no doubt my mother and sister have filled you with pathetic stories of me on my own." He looks over my shoulder with a faux-glare. "So when I called my mother and told her how you came to me for medical assistance and finished the day as my Omega, I was sure she'd have to be hospitalized."
He wraps a hand around my waist and pulls me closer to him, a hand resting possessively on the small of my back. "Suddenly, I went from a bachelor with a cat and no prospects to an Alpha with an incredible, unique, gorgeous Omega. I was so concerned that I was going to mess it up. But every time you called me Vick, I realized even if I did mess up, it would be okay. Because that name came from an incredible mistake, and that mistake helped me find you."
When he kisses me, it's not gentle. It's deep and full of the passion that Icarus hides behind many layers. I pull away, panting, and rub my nose against his. "I'm so glad you're not a murderer, Vick."
"Statistically speaking, someone here today probably is, though," he responds with a straight face.
"Woah, Russ," Simon says with a laugh, pulling me from his arms. "Don't be a narc."
A few loud laughs drift up from the audience, who I had nearly forgotten were there, watching these incredibly intimate moments.
"Simon," I say, placing a hand on his chest.
"Peaches." He smiles, covering my hand with his. "It's no secret I'm obsessed with you. I have been obsessed with you since the first time I found you on the playground in the third grade, knees scraped, and yelling at some kid for beating you in four square. I cannot pinpoint one moment where I knew that we were meant to be together. I've always known."
He scrubs a hand down his face, a way of disguising the tears that are spilling over. "I may or may not have participated in some light stalking just to make sure you were okay after I made the biggest mistake of my life."
"Sure, that's why," I tease, gently pushing his chest.
"Look, I missed you, okay? And when I found out you were mine, but you had Icarus already, I thought my life was over. I thought there was no way you'd forgive me or love me how I loved you." Simon pulls me to his chest, resting his chin on my head. "But when we were thirteen, you told me you'd decided never to watch a movie without a happy ending again. You said you couldn't see anything the main characters couldn't overcome if they were truly in love."
I snort, remembering the idealistic teenager I had been. I know now that even if you're in love, there are some things you can't come back from, but at the time, the world was so black and white.
"I knew you'd always fight for your happy ending. So I wasn't going to give up fighting, either. I know this isn't our happy ending. That will be decades away when we're old as dirt and Cyrus is senile and yelling at the neighborhood kids."
"Ass," Cyrus mutters.
"Thanks for making me a part of your happy beginning, Jordan." He steps back and kisses me, wiping the tears from my cheeks. "And to celebrate this new beginning," he says when he pulls his lips away from mine.
"We have something we'd like to tell everyone," Rafe continues.
"We're a blended pack, as everyone knows. And it's been a lot of names to juggle." Cyrus pulls an envelope out of his pocket and hands it to Icarus, who pulls a few pieces of paper out of it.
"Today, we officially become Pack Knight," Icarus says as he holds the papers out to me. I take them in my shaking hands, trying to read them through tears.
The enclosed certificate is to confirm the official formation of Pack Knight.
Pack Knight consists of the following members:
Icarus Valentine, forever known as Icarus Knight – Alpha, Pack Lead Cyrus Stargazer, forever known as Cyrus Knight – Alpha Rafe Stargazer, forever known as Rafe Knight – Alpha Simon Stargazer, forever known as Simon Knight – Alpha Jordan Cross, forever known as Jordan Knight – Omega
All rights and responsibilities of a pack are now afforded to Pack Knight, including but not limited to…
The papers fall out of my hands as I look at the four men who have each changed my life in their own way.
"You took my name?"
"Well, one of them." Rafe pulls me close and kisses me soundly before spinning me around to face the people who came here today to celebrate our love.
"Jordan was the glue that held Pack Stargazer together. When we lost her, we fell apart. She also helped us find our lost packmate in Icarus. It only felt right to name the pack after her. Until this country's laws catch up and allow an Omega to be pack lead, this was our only way of showing the world that Pack Knight does not exist without Jordan."
Rafe's words echo around us as we look at our loved ones. It's only a few seconds before Athena is on her feet, shouting.
"Fuck yeah, Pack Knight!"
My men wrap me up in a huge hug, their tears of happiness staining my dress and skin. No matter what comes our way, we'll face it the only way we can.
Together.