Evans
Tugging on my tie, I make a small noise of annoyance while my father chuckles. Was I copying his mannerisms now?
Since our dinner at Escador, with Sadie, he’d been more consistent in coming to Oakley. We’ve had lunch or dinner almost every other week for a while, and I’m not sure if he's trying to make more effort, or if he’s keeping a closer eye on me.
Part of me also wonders if it’s because he feels bad about my mother, but then I realise that’s not Harrison Crawford's style. We hadn’t talked about her yet, but she was the elephant in the room. It felt like waiting for the other shoe to drop.
“How is my delightful daughter-in-law?”
“Daughter-in-law?” I frown, my fingers tightening around the stem of my wine glass. Today we were having lunch at a bar in the next town over. It was a nice steakhouse with an expensive wine list that was longer than my arm.
“Sadie?” I snort. Sadie, delightful? Although, she had been quiet lately. I’d been avoiding her again, staying home or burying myself in practice, barely answering her calls or replying to her texts. I thought she’d gotten the message, since they’d seemed to have slowed down.
“I thought this was settled?”
My jaw clenches, my alpha agitated. “No, I don’t have a girlfriend and I’m not getting married.”
The waiter glances over at me as he passes our table, and flashes me a sympathetic expression and I realise my pheromones must have spiked. Reining it in, I bite the inside of my cheek.
My father takes a sip of his whiskey and leans back in his chair with an exasperated expression. “Not this again, Benedict.”
Why did I have to wear a damn suit to these things? Frustrated, I yank on my tie again. “I’m not going to get married just because you’ve decided that I will.”
I know that eventually, I’d have to settle down but the closer we get to graduation, the more I want to resist. Why did I have to get married? Why couldn’t I live my life the way I wanted and still work for Pembroke Holdings? Why did the two go hand in hand?
“Sadie assured me this is what you both wanted. I was told it was all in hand for an autumn wedding.”
Autumn wedding? He hadn’t actually been serious when he said that before, had he?
I don’t understand. It was like my life was a chessboard, and the pieces were being moved around me, but I never agreed to be part of the game. I didn’t want to play anymore. This was my life. My future.
He continues, pulling out a cigar from his inner pocket. My father rarely smoked, unless he was frustrated, stressed or socializing. When he did, it was always a Cohiba Behike BHK 54 in company, or a Arturo Fuente Fuente Opus X when alone.
Clipping the end, he pulls out a box of matches and strikes one.
I watch as he toasts the end, rotating the cigar between his lips until it’s smoldering.
Only then does he light it, taking small, gentle puffs.
For a moment, I wonder if Hunter liked cigars.
He enjoyed weed, and sometimes treated his joint with the same level of reverence, but cigars were a whole other ball game.
“You promised me that you would settle down and behave. Isn’t that what you’ve been doing?
Your grades have improved; you're not out causing trouble or ending up in jail. Isn’t that because you’ve finally decided to grow up?
” He exhales and a plume of smoke that smells like espresso and leather invades my senses.
None of that was because of Sadie. My grades had gone up because I’d been staying at home avoiding Hunter. I’d also been staying at home waiting for Hunter. Then recently, I’d been staying at home with Hunter.
I was too tired and emotionally exhausted to deal with other people right now and I’ve been avoiding Sadie, so house parties have sort of fallen to the wayside.
My friends were settling down or focusing on their grades, so things had just taken a different rhythm this term.
That wasn’t influenced by my ‘financé’, that was just college life and encroaching graduation.
Growling, I give up on the tie, tearing it off and stuffing it in my pocket. My father’s eyes crinkle, amused before they turn cold again.
“Make up your mind Benedict.” My father grunts, taking another slow inhale, “Pick an omega and align yourself with the path that is set out for you. Preferably, before I pay for an autumn wedding to the wrong woman.”
The wrong woman?
He’d been married three times. All of them failed. So, why was he rushing this? This is why marriage has no value in my life. How could it?
It didn’t mean anything. Not when divorce was always an option. Goddess, why was I even here? I could be home, playing video games with Hunter or working out with Blake right now.
If my father cared about making a strategic match, something that benefited Pembroke Holdings, then surely it was worth investing the time in finding the right person?
I wasn’t even asking for love, I wouldn’t recognise it if it bit me.
I wasn’t asking for a Fated Mate.
I just wanted more time. The ability to choose.
“How’s mom?” I ask, deliberately changing the subject, cruelly enjoying the way he tenses and his hand balls into a fist.
“Same as ever. She’s happy with her new life and her new wife.” He waves over at the bar, ordering another whiskey. He raises a brow as he looks at me. “Although she’s very disappointed you didn’t take her up on her offer to come and play basketball.”
We share a look and I think there’s almost a sliver of remorse on his face as he gives me a weak smile. At least he recognizes that her behavior is shitty, not that his is any better.
I take a sip of my wine. “Why did you marry her?”
He blinks, it seems like I’ve caught him off guard. Clearing his throat, he tugs on his tie. “We were compatible. Our families were familiar, so it made sense from a social and economic perspective.”
They met at Oakley University, I’d grown up knowing that.
It was always there, in the back of my mind, that expectation that one day I would meet my future wife at Oakley too.
It was one of the most prestigious elite schools in the country, which meant you were practically guaranteed to find someone suitable, just by them being admitted.
“She used to make me fee—” He pauses, the words dying on his lips. “It doesn’t really matter now.”
This is the most human I think I’ve ever seen my father, because right now, at this moment, he's not a global, cut-throat businessman or the Crawford patriarch.
No, he’s the ex-husband who clearly hasn’t been able to move on with his life.
He’s the single father who has no clue what he’s doing.
He’s a man who has failed.
“The food here is supposed to be fantastic," he says as our dishes arrive. He’s barely taken three mouthfuls when his phone rings and he frowns, glancing down at the screen.
“I need to take this,” he assures me as he gets to his feet and answers. I don’t know why he bothers explaining, he never normally did. “It’s important.”
And slowly I’m realising, so am I.
Leaning back in my sheets, Sadie’s red hair fans out on my pillowcase.
She’d come over this morning, looking for a little fun and to make sure I couldn’t avoid her plans for spring break.
The sexy fun had been a no-go, with another failed attempt under my belt.
It was Hunter’s fault. I wasn’t quite prepared to explain why or how yet, but it was.
She’s scrolling on her phone, sheets wrapped around her waist as I sit on my window seat in my boxers, saying nothing.
“I’ve been thinking about this autumn wedding thing and I think the colours will just wash me out.
So, I guess our options are to move the wedding up and get married in the summer or push it back slightly and get married in the winter.
I’m leaning towards the summer because then we’ll get the nicest photos. ”
Opening the window to clear out the sickly scent of her perfume, her words fade in and out as notes of spiced oranges and nutmeg hit my nose and my chest tightens.
“And I mean Harrison said that the budget was unlimited, but how much do you think is too much to spend on peonies and do you think we’ll be able to get them out of season?
Evans, are you even listening?”
What was I doing?
“Sorry, no. I was distracted.” Glancing down, I watch as Hunter loads his bags into the car.
He’s wearing a cropped cut off white t-shirt today and a pair of black jeans.
These ones are clean, new with no paint spatters and it almost looks wrong.
Blake comes out, carrying Hunter’s pillows, tossing them into the trunk.
He was heading to his parents lake house this afternoon, and the urge to jump in the car with him grows the longer I listen to Sadie drowning on about I don’t even know what.
An alarm bell sounds in my head as my mouth goes dry. “Wait, flowers for what?”
She snickers, looking up to give me a smile. “Our wedding flowers, silly. I really like the ponies but if you feel strongly about them, we can go with lilies of the valley.”
Sadie sits up and the sheets fall further. As I look at her, naked in my bed, all I can think is ‘Now my sheets need to be washed’. The sight of her gorgeous body–and it is gorgeous–is doing nothing for me. The same as it did nothing for me earlier.
“Why does everybody keep talking to me about weddings?” Crossing my arms, I lean back against the wall, so I can watch Hunter and Blake while also appearing like I’m listening to Sadie. “I’m not getting married.”
She takes a deep breath, pinching the bridge of her nose with her eyes closed before she fixes her glare on me.
“This is getting ridiculous now. Our parents have approved. We’re going to view a venue this week together with my parents.
Your father has given us access to an unlimited budget for our dream wedding. You know this.”