Chapter 54
chapter
fifty-four
Bond with me??
Did they seriously just say that? Is this actually happening?
And where the hell is Adrian taking us ?
I’m sure my face gave away how astonished I was—because as soon as they finished issuing their new proposal, the pack leader only watched my features for a beat before announcing he knew what I needed.
I followed them, mostly because I was too stunned to object.
I still am. While I trail behind our alpha, I channel my anxiety into unraveling my braids, a dozen questions roaring through my brain.
They want to give up the potential to find a mate? And not just stay for my heat—but forever ?
What if I say yes and they change their mind?
What if I say yes and they don’t change their minds?
Will I ever forgive myself if I let them go without trying?
Will I ever forgive myself if I let them in and they break my heart?
Adrian is unnervingly quiet. Since Dante batted my engagement ring into the sunset, their pack alpha has only spoken to give directions. We obey his low commands without hesitation; I suspect the guys are just as apprehensive about the silent intensity pouring off him as I am.
We make our way from the public batting cages to the tunnel system stretched below. Adrian uses his phone to bypass several security doors. Lights automatically flicker on and off again as we make our way from the new portion of the stadium to the refurbished part.
Adrian finally holds open one last door, waving the guys through and stepping behind me as I pass from the tunnel onto… the field?
“This is the only place in the whole stadium with cameras that turn off,” he explains. “We shut them down for practices and training. No other monitor can be paused—and I’ve added several new angles since the incident here during our first game.”
A chill streaks up my back, the memory sinking its claws into my heart.
I know my scent must be painful to them at this point.
It’s never perfectly sweet or mellow—but with the shame and doubt seething in my middle?
Colt flinches when I step beside him. He’s always been the most sensitive to my scent—and the wince on his otherwise unreadable face slices a little deeper than usual.
I’m used to this, damn it. It shouldn’t affect me anymore.
Why does it still hurt ?
And why does it hurt more by the minute ?
Because you love them.
I want to rage at my Omega. Shove her down. Tell her to cram it. But… that voice isn’t even hers.
It’s mine .
I love them.
How did this happen? I had a plan. I had my armor on. I made smart decisions and guarded myself at every possible turn.
How did their rejection go from an inevitable inconvenience to my greatest fear?
And if I somehow get it together and let them try to be my alphas… will I ever stop waiting for them to leave me?
As if he can sense my spiraling thoughts, Jesse sloughs out a pained sound, opening his arms. Adrian leads the others toward the bases, but the golden-haired alpha pauses to hold me, mumbling into my hair. “You’re so stressed, Bee. If you don’t want to try this… or you don’t want to do it here …”
His offer is implied. I know he means it—they would bundle me into the car and take me home right now if I asked them to. None of them would lay a finger on me, now or in my heat, if I said no.
I don’t want to, though.
Whatever Adrian has in mind, he seems determined. His solid self-assurance has me curious.
Why did he bring us here?
What does he want them to do to me?
Wondering what the alpha is thinking is much better than being inside my own head, though. I try to focus on that, letting my mind wander over the possibilities. He doesn’t keep me waiting, gesturing to the Kings’ home plate with a nod.
His aqua gaze snaps to the guys. “Our omega needs us to show her how much we want to bond with her.” He turns his seething, ocean irises on me. Silently asking, Right?
Damn him . How does he do this? Reading my thoughts and secret hopes and the fears I barely admit to myself?
He sees it all . And drags them out of me with a simple arch of his dark, winged brow.
I let my chin drop, acknowledging his wordless question with an equally muted answer. Adrian takes it, though, sending me a burst of pure pride before bending to kiss my forehead.
“Good girl,” he murmurs, then, louder, “Whoever you want to ride will lay down here.”
He removes his shirt and rolls his shoulders. The tanned muscles ripple. Diffused light from the cages next door pools between his cut abs as his eyes glimmer. “So, who’s first, omega?”
I’m not used to listening to the voice clamoring inside me. But if this is supposed to be practice for what my heat could be like—what they could all be like…
For once, I tune in to my Omega’s insistent nudges. Repeating the name she produces instantly. “Colt.”
I expect the salty alpha to scowl at me. Or at the very least grumble. Instead, intensity snaps across his face. He pauses for a moment, then unceremoniously tosses the book in his hand to the nearest patch of turf and steps closer.
“You sure?” he asks, gesturing at his recovering leg. “I’m not exactly on my A-game, Bubbles.”
Something about the dangerous gleam in his gray eyes tells me I might not be able to handle his A-game. Not all at once, at least.
But the wry wistfulness filling his features says something else. And I wonder… has he been holding back because of me and our situation? Or has he been worried he’d disappoint me?
I hold his gaze while I nod. Whispering one word. “Please?”