Chapter 48
chapter
forty-eight
“Serena.”
Nope . I’m way too warm and comfortable to wake up.
Snuggling into the solid, naked alpha in front of me, I shake my head and turn my face, hiding against a muscled wall of chest hair.
Jonah .
His name brings a flood of memories.
The fierce lines of his face when he lost control. How scary it was to be swept up by an alpha as big as him. The way I had to make a snap decisi on about how much to give him. How I passed out almost the second he finished.
Shit .
I never got to talk to him about what happened. If it was okay for me to do that with him when he’d been so careful about waiting.
I gasp, scrambling to open my eyes and find his, pushing on his chest for purchase. To my shock, he instantly slides away from me.
Shit, shit, shit .
My frantic eyes scan his face in the pre-dawn gray, finding his golden eyes doing the same to me.
Oh . Is he worried he’s upset me ?
“Serena,” he starts again, rough with emotion. “I am so sorry. I—I can’t even tell you how fucking sorry I am.”
I open my mouth and try to reassure him, but he’s more frantic by the second, running his shaking hands over my arms, my sides, my hips.
“Did I hurt you?” he mumbles, squinting to see my skin… and the bruises splotched on my thighs. “Jesus. Of course I hurt you. I’m almost three hundred fucking pounds, and you—you’re?—”
Horror flashes through his gaze. “Oh fuck. I didn’t knot you, did I? Serena, I swear to God, I will go and drown myself in the fucking pool if I knotted you or tried to bite or?—”
“ Hey ,” I snap, then soften. “Whoa. Slow down, big man. I’m okay. See? I’m fine.”
There’s a moment of tense stillness. Then he snatches me into his arms, snuggling me tightly and dropping his face to mine.
“God,” he breathes, kissing my cheeks, my eyelids, my nose. “I’m so fucking sorry, hummingbird. So sorry. I love you so much, I never would have?—”
I go rigid in his arms, suddenly fighting to breathe. “Y-you— what ?”
He rolls onto his back, bringing my body with his. Cuddling me sweetly. “I love you,” he murmurs, certain and steady. “You’re everyt hing to me. Maybe I should have told you before. I just wanted you to feel ready.”
Ready for him. Ready to accept all of the things he’s been trying to give me since the first night he attempted to wrestle Avery out of my room. And every day after—with each plate of food and every patient life lesson. All of his cuddles and his jokes and the reverent way he touches me all the time.
He loves me.
My heart swells and soars as tears well in my eyes.
Because, well.
No one has ever said that to me before.
I know Avery has, in his way. Without words. But this feels different.
Splatters spill over my lashes and Jonah softens even more, cradling me against him so tenderly.
“ Manamea ,” he sighs. “I love you so much. I’m so sorry. I’ll do anything to make this up to you. I’ll talk to Doc about taking rut-blockers. They can bench me if they have to, I don’t fucking care?—”
I press my fingertips into his lips, feeling his facial hair against the pads. My nipples prick, but I ignore them, mumbling my plea.
“Say it again.”
His sweet scent deepens as he rolls us back, putting me underneath him and stretching his arm over my head to pet my hair. His warm gaze sinks into mine, all sincerity and devotion. “I love you.”
When more tears stream from my eyes, he says it again. And again. He whispers it into my skin as he kisses me, then settles between my legs.
Again as I nip at his neck, and again when he gently presses into my pussy.
My core trembles, welcoming him back without any complaint. We move together while he leaves love all across my skin. Until I swear I can feel it sinking into my soul .
This time, he works himself into me much slower. The ledge of his brow folds over his amber eyes, betraying hesitation.
“I’m too fucking big,” he mutters, worry singeing the edges of his toasty scent.
I smooth my fingers over the creases in his forehead. “No, you were right. I’m your mate—and we fit perfectly .”
I swear I catch a bit of mist in his eyes before he bears down, finally giving me what I want. And— God —it really is perfect.
Once I’m gasping and moaning around the earth-shattering thickness of his cock, he goes rigid, holding himself still.
Holding himself back .
“I want it,” I beg, breathing hard. “I want you to knot me.”
But he shakes his head. “It’s too much,” he mumbles. “I don’t want to knot you alone. I want one of the guys here in case something happens, and I?—”
I can’t exactly argue with him. He is huge. Twice as wide as me, over a foot taller. Solid muscle and plenty of padding, to boot.
Still, I press my pussy up into the mass expanding at the base of his length. “I want you, though,” I practically cry. “Please.”
His eyes flare with panic, even as his face crumbles, the longing plain in every feature. “ Manamea , I?—”
“Knot her, Jonah.”
We both still at the low, even voice that speaks from the threshold of the room.
Tristan stands there in nothing more than a pair of gray sweatpants. Arms crossed, leaning into the doorjamb, he looks rumpled and gorgeous in the half-light.
Did he… stay up all night? Sitting in the hallway? To make sure we were okay in here?
One glance into his deep blue eyes tells me yes . He did.
He approaches the bed slowly, each step measured and smooth. “I’m right here, Jonah,” he says, calm. “I’ll make sure you don’t accidentally hurt her.”
Part of me wants to tell him there have been dozens of times when he’s hurt me and he couldn’t even tell. So why he thinks he’s qualified to act as my emotional barometer is beyond me.
Then again, if it will make Jonah more comfortable, how can I say no?
Especially right now. When his huge, thick cock is splitting me in half for the second time tonight, and all I can think is more, deeper, now .
Until that horrible voice hisses, Just a silly little ? —
But no.
I tell it no .
Because Jonah loves me . He said so. And even if I hadn’t believed him, I would now, when he examines every curve of my features for any trace of hesitation.
I love him, too. And I know how much it will mean to him to have this memory with me.
“The Senator can watch,” I whisper, trying for a teasing smile that must look a little crazy, considering how desperate I feel with his thickness lodged wide and hard and way too still inside me.
Tris drifts closer, and Jonah exhales against my neck. His rough palm practically covers my entire thigh while he rubs sweetly at the trembling muscles.
“You sure, hummingbird? You want my knot?”
I twine my arms around his neck. “Yes. Please , Alpha.”
With a quiet groan, Jonah shifts his hips, reminding me just how deep and thick he really is. Fuck . I really hope I’m not being too cavalier about?—
Oh.
OH!
A shrill whine splits the air when Jonah tilts his hips and shoves the top half of his knot past the tight ring quivering at my entrance. An odd mix of pain and pleasure buzzes through my body—my internal muscles singing with joy while the ones stretched around his girth scream in protest.
When Jonah turns to stone again, the pain wins out, and I whimper. He tenses, bracing to rip himself out .
But Tristan’s hand lands on his packmate’s shoulder at the same second his other palm finds the crown of my head. “Shhh, sweet one,” he soothes, gazing down at me. “Jonah’s not going to stop.”
Then, to his packmate. “If you pull back now, you’ll only hurt her more. Press all the way in and she’ll be much better.”
I whine again, nodding frantically and biting my lip to keep from crying. Tristan’s long fingers pet my head in slow caresses. “I know,” he murmurs, “I know, baby. Your alpha is going to make you feel better, okay?”
He infuses a bark into his voice. “Jonah, now .”
With a sloughed growl, Jonah’s pained eyes fly to mine, and his body bears down against me. Finally, the lower half of his knot pops into place.
And I explode .
Into a million shimmery pieces. Into stardust and shining euphoria.
The feeling is so incredible, it doesn’t even make sense . It’s impossible. Too perfect. Too glorious and complete and full.
Jonah roars, the deep sound vibrating against my breasts while he buries his face against my shoulder. “Fuck, Serena,” he roughs out, the words nearly a sob. “You’re so fucking good .”
I can’t understand what he’s talking about when, clearly, he’s the one who’s hit the reboot button on my very existence . And now I’ll just be glitter, floating around in space for eternity.
Or so I think.
Until he moves .
Holy. Fuck.
His knot tugs on every nerve inside of me, grinding into the sizzling pleasure points with every nudge of his hips. I moan, my pussy gushing slick and perfume until I swear I feel a puddle underneath me.
“There’s a good girl,” Tristan murmurs, softer. “Squirting all over your big alpha. You’re so beautiful, stretched like this.”
Thinking about his obscene view only makes me tremble harder , my body wound to the breaking point. Jonah noses at my pulse, sucking at my neck while he works me in circles. His groin hits my clit every time he finishes a rotation, bringing me to the edge of a cliff I’m afraid to jump from.
But Tristan is there, solid and steady, pumping reassurance into the air with that unflappable calm of his. “You’re going to come all over that huge knot,” he tells me, blue eyes flashing. “And he’ll be locked inside you for the rest of the night.”
After spending years dreaming of this— needing this —the thought alone is enough to push me over. My core cinches, squeezing everything Jonah has with enough force to rip a scream from my lips.
“Fuck,” he gasps, snarling my name. “Fuck, Serena.”
With a final growl, the solid weight inside of me doubles—pressing out, rubbing around. Filling every nook until throbbing heat strokes the pulse echoing from my clit to my inner walls.
One climax rolls right into another, both of us coming twice before we manage to find one another again. His lips brush mine, reverent and panting.
“ Manamea . You’re really mine now, yeah? My omega?”
Fresh tears rise in my eyes while I squeeze him with my arms and legs, nodding into his broad shoulder.
“Yes,” I cry quietly. “Yes, your omega.”
He nestles into the crook of my neck, breathing shakily and squeezing his eyes shut while I nuzzle his bearded cheek.
He stays locked deep while we settle into one another, my hands roaming his back as he calms. Tristan is gone—and I don’t know when he disappeared from the bedside to let us have our moment, but I find it touching how much he respects his packmates.
Jonah sinks against me, settling. But in my middle, there’s a quick flicker of light. Just enough to make me turn my head and look toward the doorway, where our pack leader has paused to watch me comfort our big man .
The flare inside sparks into a full-blown feeling. The first one he’s ever voluntarily shared.
And it’s…
Gratitude.
For me .
He doesn’t say the words, but I see them on his face and feel them inside, as clear as any said out loud. Thank you, omega .