14. Grace
The moment the morning sunshine catches my eyes, I wake with a smile on my face. Last night was amazing, the time we had sex because we wanted to and not because I was in heat.
I touch my lips. They’re still tingling from all the kisses we told each other would never happen.
I shiver, aware I’ll see him when I turn over in bed. Though, I can’t deny that I’m a little disappointed I haven’t woken in his arms again, like yesterday.
The way he holds me, he makes me feel protected and cherished, and I’ll never get sick of it.
I want to see him.
I want to know he wants me.
He told me over and over that I was his omega. I feel it too.
I turn on the bed and stare at the indent on his pillow.
The beats of my heart quicken as I look around the room. Only seeing his tee shirt folded on the chair.
“Henry,” I call as I push my hands against the mattress and stare at the bathroom door.
My smile is already wide on my face as I wait for him to position his mask and greet me. Though, I hope he’s about to step out of the bathroom not wearing it.
That’s the only thing I don’t like about this agreement we have. That he insisted he couldn’t take it off. But I know he wants me more than he thinks. I feel it in the way he holds me; the way he kisses me; the way he causes a million butterflies to flutter inside me.
He must feel the same way. After all, he kept saying I was his.
I drag back the sheets on the bed and walk to the chair. My finger slides over his tee shirt before lifting it and inhaling his smell. I’m no longer in heat, but like every time before, his scent hits me like my body knows he is mine, and I’m yearning for him again.
I scrunch the material in my hands, breathing in like an addict needing a hit. My eyelashes fluttering at his smell, but my pussy does the same.
I need him.
I inhale deeply once more before I pull the tee shirt over my body.
“Henry,” I say as I walk to the bathroom door. When I get there, I tap my fingernails over the panel. “Are you okay?”
There’s still no answer.
“I’m coming in,” I warn him, in case he isn’t wearing his mask.
He doesn’t reply, so I push on the door and step inside, my eyes searching before I freeze.
The room is empty. Not even his toothbrush is on the counter.
I take ages to grasp what this means. When it finally sinks in, I’m so crushed with sadness that a sob leaves my mouth. He never wanted me.
Another sob.
And another. Then a high-pitched sound leaves my mouth as I blink back the tears. Still not believing what I’m seeing.
I drop to my hands and knees, and blubber, tears dropping onto the tiled floor into a puddle.
After a few minutes, I turn, sit on my ass, and wrap my arms around my aching stomach. I rest my head on my knees, trying to remember what I did wrong.
He warned you.
Now I know what he meant when he told me not to catch feelings. But why did he make me believe he wanted me—when he didn’t?
“Why were you so stupid, Grace?” I whisper. “He never wanted you... Only your heat.”
I should have agreed to the other alpha, who offered me a fortune. At least I would be richer and closer to my dream. I gave Henry my heat and got nothing but a cold bed and a sick heart that I never thought could be broken.
I should have remembered.
He told me his career was the only important thing in his life.
He told me he doesn’t date anyone.
He told me he was never falling in love with anyone.
And I don’t want to be an omega.
This is for the best.
It doesn’t feel like it’s for the best at the moment as more silent sobs wreck through my body.
I’m trying to hold it together as I crawl out of the bathroom. And when I reach the bed, I drag myself up, wanting so desperately to lie on the mattress and fall asleep, but I need my mom right now.
I need to feel loved.
I need her to hug me.
I know I’ll feel stronger when she holds me.
“I need the implant. Only then will I forget him,” I insist to myself. “Omegas are pathetic.”
After packing my suitcase, I glance around the room once more before I open the door and stride to the elevator, dragging the suitcase behind me.
As the door closes, I stare at the room once more. Tears prick my eyes as I remember what this was.
A few perfect nights. He never promised me more than that.
Why did he tell me I was his?
By the time the elevator doors open, tears roll down my face again, stinging against my cheeks. Not wanting my mom to see me this way, I bite my lip to stop them, but nothing blocks the flow.
I can still smell him. Raspberries coated in chocolate with a side of sweet marshmallow. I’m so pathetic it’s like his scent coats the inside of the elevator, along with another scent, that I can’t put my finger on. But together they are so delicious.
I stare ahead for a moment. Was there another man in my room?
I shake my head. I can’t remember.
It doesn’t matter. All I want is Henry.
It took me a while to want him for more than my heat, but once I relaxed into the situation that we were in; I felt a connection between us—well, not between us—because he obviously never felt the same way.
“Bastard,” I whimper, grabbing my iPad from my bag and opening my BetaFans app.
I can’t see him again. I know I’ll want him, but I’ll only know I was only good enough in my heat.
My finger hovers over the delete app box for a moment. Because the moment I press the button I no longer have his details, but I lose all my subscribers too.
And I need them.
I need to get my life back to normal and stop feeling like this. I find his contact details and block him from contacting me on the app before deleting his contact details. I do the same on the OmegaFans app, though I should just delete this app forever.
Henry leaving before I even woke up confirms to me I’m better off being a beta. I doubt any other alpha will make me feel the same way as he temporarily did.
As I walk down the corridor, I remove the sim card from my burner phone, and clutch it in my palm as I stroll to the cleaner’s trolley.
I stop with my hand hovering over the black bag, knowing that once I open my fingers, I can never contact him or let him contact me again.
I take a deep breath, letting it out slowly. My chest makes a deep whining sound as I release the card. I quickly rush away before I rummage through the bag to find it.
Seconds later, I knock on my mom’s hotel door.
She opens the door. “Grace, baby, what’s wrong?”
I burst into tears and fall in her arms.