33. Lucas
Silence has suffocated us for a day now, and the tension in the air is thick and palpable.
“We need to talk.”
Stanton spins to me, betrayal in his eyes. “Why? She told me she hates us both.”
His face contorts in a mixture of anguish and nausea, his hand clutching at his stomach. The sickly pallor of his skin suggests he’ll vomit at any moment.
Still holding his stomach, he looks at me and glares. “This is all your fucking fault. I trusted you, Lucas. I protected you from your fucking father, and he went and told her I was there during her heat.”
What the fuck!
I blink hard as I grip the bridge of my nose. “He spoke to her. Why the hell has he spoken to her?”
“Because he always wants to win,” Stanton scoffs, the bitterness in his tone unmistakable. “And you fell for whatever he told you. Otherwise, why did you tell him?”
A surge of anger courses through me, overpowering the hurt. “I trusted him.” It feels like a betrayal from my father. “I thought I had a connection with him for once in my life.” My voice softens pleadingly. “I know I messed up, Stanton. But I did nothing out of bitterness. My father saw how hurt I looked when Grace was wearing your jersey. He knew.”
“You were jealous.”
“Of course, I was fucking jealous.” I close my eyes, trying to calm my racing heart. “But don’t stand there all innocent. You knew what you were doing?”
“I did.” Stanton shakes his head. “But you were never supposed to walk straight into your father’s plans.”
My father always plays his games, manipulating situations to his advantage. And this time, I’d fallen into his trap.
Taking a deep breath, I meet Stanton’s gaze; the pain etched in his features mirroring my own inner turmoil. “I’m sorry,” I whisper, the words heavy with regret.
Stanton’s anger wavers, replaced by a weariness that weighs down on his shoulders. “Sorry doesn’t change what happened,” he mutters. “She told me it’s over.”
“Why didn’t you fight for her after you spoke to your dad?” Stanton stabs his finger into my chest accusingly. “Why do you always give up on her?”
“Because I’m scared,” I say, swallowing a thick lump of anguish.
He shakes his head, not understanding.
“She was mine. She was always mine, Stanton.” Stanton is getting fuzzy as my eyes fill with tears. “But she gave her neck to you. She gave her neck to the playboy, not me, the one who had wanted her since she was a beta.”
“Fuck, Lucas, this isn’t a competition between us. We’re two alphas who have the same end goal.”
“You weren’t my end goal,” I admit. “She was.”
He sighs. “That’s it then? I’ve known we’re a pack since the day I met you. I’m thirty fucking years old. I met you five years ago when you came to the club as a rookie. I waited and waited for you… and then I got sick of waiting.”
“So it’s my fault you fucked around?” I yell.
“No, but it’s your fault you never recognized what was in front of you. Your pack mate. If you did, the night of her heat would’ve been different.”
“I recognized you, Stanton, but…” I sigh. “My life is different from yours. My father doesn’t…”
“Stop! I am fucking sick of listening to you making excuses. Are you in or out?”
Her choosing Stanton as her mate, not me, still makes my heart ache like nothing else since I found out yesterday. Not even when my mother left me to live with her alpha hurt more.
And after losing his mother, Stanton needs his omega… his mate, even if our friendship and potential for being a pack are destroyed in the meantime.
As I search for the right words to mend the rift I’d caused, a realization strikes me as the weight of our shattered friendship hangs on a thread between us. I take a deep breath and say, “I’ll fix this.”
“How?” His expression softens slightly.
“I’ll make her believe you.”
“And you?”
“She doesn’t want me.”
Later that day and still fueled by anger, I storm through the hallway to my father’s office, ignoring his secretary’s attempts to stop me. My footsteps echo loudly against the pristine marble floors as I reach his door, step inside, and with a forceful push, I slam it shut behind me.
My father lifts his head as the sound reverberates throughout the room.
“Why the fuck did you get involved?”
His eyes narrow as they lock onto mine, and his lips press together in a thin line. It’s clear from his body language that he understands the gravity of the situation.
The rise and fall of his chest is steady and rhythmic before he exhales. “I was trying to make things better. I was trying to make my wrongs right.”
“What?” I grunt. “You made everything worse.”
His body tenses. Everything about him seems tense, to be honest. Normally, my father is the epitome of relaxation. Nothing ever bothers him.
But something has.
“Sorry, I never meant to.” The more I look at him, the more I notice the subtle changes. He looks like he hasn’t been home in days by his disheveled appearance.
“You look tired,” I say.
“I feel it.” He sighs, pulling at the tie that isn’t snug against his shirt. “I feel like I can’t breathe.”
“Do you need an ambulance?” Slight panic laces my tone. I don’t particularly like my father, but I don’t wish for his demise, either.
He shakes his head and pulls the tie off, throwing it on his desk. “I felt your pain, Lucas.” He blinks hard as he blows out a breath. “Seeing you the other night brought it all back to me.”
“Brought what back?”
“The feeling I’ve tried to forget. The longing for an omega who is yours.”
My heart aches with conflicting emotions as thoughts of Grace flood my mind. Memories of her heat bring a smile to my face, but they are quickly overshadowed by the hurt I feel at her choosing Stanton.
I try to push her out of my mind, but she remains like a constant thorn in my side.
My father pushes away from his desk and walks to the window. “I told you I tried to forget I had a fated mate out there. That I did it for your mother’s sake. For my children’s sake.” He turns and paces the room, like a lion going crazy in a small cage. “But I couldn’t have you go through the same thing.”
“What are you saying?”
“I promise you I didn’t know that Grace didn’t have a clue about the night of her heat.”
Anger burns inside me when I hiss, “Why the hell didn’t you call me to let me know? Forewarn me.”
“Because I’ve had a terrible time of my own.”
He shakes his head before he scrapes his hand over the rough stubble on his chin.
“What happened?”
“I found my fated mate.” He turns and gazes out at the New York sprawling cityscape. Letting his thoughts mix with the sounds of honking cars.
“You did,” I whisper.
He pushes his hands in his pocket as his shoulders sag. “And I don’t know what to do.”
“Do you want her?” I ask. “Did she smell you?”
He turns and looks at me. “I’m not sure.”
“Then how do you know she’s a scent match?”
His gaze wanders around the spacious office, taking in the oval conference table where he holds important meetings. The pictures of former presidents, his idols, on the walls.
“Because there has never been a perfume that has had me prepared to give all this up for an omega ever before.”
He settles into his oversized leather chair and rests his hands on the smooth surface of the dark oak desk in front of him.
“Are you trying to tell me there’s a decent alpha underneath that hard shell?”
He shrugs his shoulders and taps his shirt where his heart beats underneath. “I don’t know if there is anything good under here. And that’s the reason I think I should stay away from her.”
I remember back to when my father told me he knew he had a scented mate. But that was so long ago. “It was twenty-one years ago. Are you sure it was her?”
“It never goes away, Lucas. Never...” He scrapes his fingers through his gray temples. “You have to fight for Grace or you’ll be in pain for the rest of your life.”
“Bitter and twisted like you, you mean?”
He drops his gaze to the floor. “I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry for being a terrible father.”
“Maybe this scent match will make you a better man… a better alpha.”
His eyes lift and meet mine, and I notice a subtle swallow in his throat. He shakes his head.
“But you’re telling me to.”
“Because believe it or not, I don’t want you to hurt like me. I’m harder than you. I’ve encased my heart in a steel cage all these years, and yes, you’re right, it did make me bitter and twisted. I lost sight of everything good in the world and lost my children in the process. Today, I accept that. I want you to have happiness, Lucas. And I know you’ll get that with Grace.”
“Why don’t you want to have your happy ever after?” I ask. “Do you enjoy living in misery?”
“My scent match is bitter and twisted because she was claimed by an alpha who wasn’t hers.”
“How do you know this?”
“I met her…”
“Go on.”
“When I went to talk to Grace.” His eyes flutter closed as he exhales a deep breath. “It’s Grace’s mother.”