Chapter 17 #2
"Time." She repeated the word slowly, savoring it like a fine wine.
"Such a precious commodity. Especially for your little human.
She's running out of it, isn't she? Her scent blocker is nearly gone.
Her swimming potion is almost depleted." She leaned forward, and I caught a glimpse of something moving in the darkness behind her—something large and ancient and better left unseen.
"She'll be exposed soon. Vulnerable. All those hungry alphas and betas on that ship, finally realizing what they have in their midst."
"That's why we're here," I forced the words out through clenched teeth, hating every syllable not liking how she always seemed to know what was going on without having to really tell her anything."We need more blocker. More potion. Enough to give her time to decide."
"To decide what?" The witch's voice was silk and poison, sliding over my skin like oil.
"Whether to stay with you? Whether to let you transform her, claim her, keep her in the dark depths forever?
" She laughed, and the sound was like bones breaking, like ships sinking, like every terrible thing I'd ever heard condensed into a single horrible noise.
"She already knows what she wants, little siren. She's just too afraid to take it."
"That's her choice to make." The words came out harder than I intended, sharp as coral. "Not yours. Not even ours. Hers." The witch studied me for a long moment, her black eyes unreadable. Then she smiled again—slower this time, almost approving.
"I do love the stubborn ones," She murmured, more to herself than to us. "Very well. I can give you what you need. Scent blocker. Swimming potion. Enough to last her... let's say a month. Long enough for her to make her decision, one way or another."
"What's the price?" Riven's voice was rough, barely controlled.
I could feel him vibrating beside me, every muscle coiled tight with the effort of not attacking her.
The witch's smile widened, and this time I saw all the rows of teeth—seven, eight, more than I could count, disappearing into the endless dark of her throat.
"A memory," she said softly, almost gently. "One from each of you. Your happiest. The single brightest moment in all your long, long lives."
The water around us seemed to freeze. I heard Riven's sharp intake of breath, felt his shock and horror pulse through the bond like a physical blow.
Memories were precious to sirens. More precious than gold, more precious than territory, more precious than anything else in the world.
They were all we had of the centuries behind us.
The only proof that we had lived, that we had mattered, that our existence meant anything at all.
She wanted our happiest ones.
For me, that memory was clear and bright and perfect: the first time Lily had smiled at me.
Really smiled—not the cautious half-smile she gave the crew, not the mask she wore to survive.
A real smile, surprised and delighted and so beautiful it had stopped my ancient heart in my chest. I couldn't even remember what—and she'd laughed.
Actually laughed. And the sound had rewritten something fundamental in my soul.
That memory. That perfect, precious memory of the moment I'd realized I would die for her, kill for her, burn the entire world for her. The witch wanted me to give it up. To have it ripped from my mind, leaving nothing but an empty space where joy had once lived.
"Done." The word left my mouth before I could stop it, before I could think, before I could do anything but react to the desperate need clawing at my chest.
"Kaelan—" Riven started, his voice cracked with horror.
"Done." I repeated, meeting the witch's bottomless eyes without flinching. "You can have it. My happiest memory. Whatever you want. Just give us what we need."
The witch's smile softened into something that almost looked like pity. "And you, scarred one? What say you?"
Riven was shaking. I could feel it through the bond—a fine tremor running through his entire body, fear and rage and grief all tangled together into something that made my chest ache.
His happiest memory, I knew, was similar to mine.
A moment with Lily. The first time she'd touched his scars without flinching, the first time she'd looked at him like he was beautiful instead of broken.
"Done." His voice was barely a whisper, cracked and broken. "Take it. Take whatever you want. Just... save her."
The witch nodded slowly, satisfaction gleaming in her dark eyes.
"Then we have an agreement." She raised one long, thin hand, her fingers extending toward us like reaching claws. "Give me what I'm owed."
The extraction hurt. I'd expected pain—the witch's magic always hurt—but this was something else entirely.
It felt like she was reaching into my skull, her cold fingers wrapping around something bright and warm and essential, and pulling.
Ripping. Tearing it away from the place where it had lived for.
.. how long? Days? Weeks? I couldn't remember anymore.
Something important was leaving me. Something that mattered. Something that had made everything else worthwhile.
Then it was gone.
I floated in the cold water of the witch's cave, gasping for breath I didn't need, and tried to understand what I'd lost. There was a gap in my mind now—a dark space where light had once lived.
I knew something precious had been there.
I knew it had been important. But when I reached for it, tried to remember what it had felt like, there was nothing.
Just emptiness.
Just cold.
Beside me, Riven made a sound like an animal dying. His hands were pressed to his head, his claws drawing thin lines of blood that spiraled into the water around him. His golden eyes were wide and glazed with pain, with grief, with the terrible knowledge of what we'd just sacrificed.
"There now." The witch's voice drifted through the darkness, satisfied and sated.
"That wasn't so bad, was it?" She pressed two vials into my numb hands—one filled with amber liquid, the other with something that shimmered blue-green in the sickly light.
"Scent blocker. Swimming potion. Enough to last your little human one month. Use it wisely."
I stared at the vials, trying to remember why they mattered. Something about... someone. Someone important. The gaps in my memory made it hard to think, hard to focus on anything but the aching emptiness where something beautiful had once lived.
"Go now." The witch's voice was dismissive, already bored with us. "Before I change my mind and ask for something else."
We went.
The journey back was a blur. I swam mechanically, my body remembering the currents even as my mind struggled to piece together what had happened. Riven swam beside me in silence, his scarred face wet with something that might have been tears.
Halfway back to the garden, he spoke.
"I can't remember." His voice was hollow, devastated. "There was something... something important. Something about her. And now it's just... gone."
"I know." The words scraped against my throat like broken shells. "I can't remember either."
"What did we give up?" His golden eyes found mine, desperate and afraid. "What did we sacrifice? It felt... it felt like everything, Kaelan. Like the most important thing I've ever had."
I didn't answer. I couldn't. Because the truth was, I didn't know. I just knew that there was a hole in my chest where something precious had lived, and no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't remember what had filled it.
When I thought about Lily—when I pictured her face, her smile, the sound of her laugh—something in that empty space stirred. Not a memory. Not anymore. Just a feeling. A certainty.
Whatever I'd given up, whatever price I'd paid, it had been worth it.
She was worth it.
She would always be worth it.
We reached the garden just as the first pale light of dawn began filtering down through the water above us. Vale and Thane were waiting, their bodies curled protectively around a smaller form—Lily, asleep in the nest of their arms, her face peaceful in a way I rarely saw when she was awake.
"Did you get it?" Vale's voice was soft, careful not to wake her. His silver eyes scanned our faces, and I saw understanding dawn in them—horror and grief and something that looked almost like gratitude, all tangled together. "The potion. The blocker. Did she give them to you?"
"Yes." I held up the vials, feeling their weight in my palm. Such small things to have cost so much. "Enough for a month."
"What did she take?" Thane's voice was thick with tears, his golden-brown eyes already overflowing. He knew. Of course he knew. The witch always took the same thing from sirens. The only thing that truly mattered.
"It doesn't matter." Riven's voice was rough, but steady. He moved closer to where Lily slept, his scarred hand reaching out to brush a strand of hair from her face. "Whatever it was, it was worth it. She's worth it."
I watched him touch her, watched the tenderness in his movements, and felt something shift in my chest. The empty space was still there—would probably always be there—but around its edges, new memories were already forming. New moments of joy to replace the ones we'd lost.
The first time she opened her eyes and saw us waiting for her.
The first time she said our names like they meant something.
The first time she chose us, over and over again, even when she was afraid.
"She doesn't need to know," I said quietly, settling beside my pack, beside our omega, beside the woman who had become the center of everything without even trying. "What we paid. What we gave up. She doesn't need to carry that."
"Agreed," Vale's voice was soft, his silver eyes fixed on Lily's sleeping face. "Some prices are meant to be paid in secret."
"Some sacrifices are meant to be made in the dark," Thane added, his voice cracking on a sob.
Riven said nothing. He just curled his body around Lily's, his scarred arms wrapping around her like he could protect her from the entire world, and closed his eyes.
I watched them for a long moment—my pack, my family, the four people who mattered more to me than centuries of existence. Then I tucked the vials away safely and let myself drift closer, adding my body to the protective circle around the woman we loved.
She stirred slightly in her sleep, murmuring something I couldn't quite hear. But her hand reached out, found mine, and held on tight.
Despite the emptiness in my chest, despite the memory I could no longer recall, I smiled.
She was worth it.
She would always be worth it.