Chapter 14
Tessa
Iwake up burning.
Not the manageable warmth from before. This is different. This is my skin on fire, my blood too hot, every nerve ending screaming for something I can’t name. The ache between my thighs has become a hollow emptiness that makes me want to cry.
Ben’s arms are still around me. His scent, leather and musk, wraps around me like a blanket, and for a moment I just breathe him in, trying to ground myself. But even that’s not enough anymore. Even his scent, as good as it is, isn’t enough.
I need more.
“Hey.” His voice is rough with sleep. “You okay?”
I shake my head against his chest. Words feel impossible.
He’s awake instantly, his hand coming up to feel my forehead. “Shit. You’re burning up.” He pulls back enough to look at my face, his brow furrowed with concern. “It’s getting worse, isn’t it?”
“Yes.” The word comes out broken. “Everything hurts. I feel so empty.”
“Okay.” He presses a kiss to my forehead. “I’m going to get the others. We need to talk. Figure out how to help you.”
I grab his arm before he can move. “Ben. I’m scared.”
His expression softens. “Of what?”
“This is my first heat. With alphas, I mean. I’ve always suppressed them and I don’t know what I’m like when I lose control.” I force myself to meet his eyes. “What if I beg you to bond me?”
He’s quiet for a moment. Then he cups my face in his hands.
“We’re not going to bond you, Tessa. Not during your heat.”
“But what if I beg—”
“Then we say no.” His voice is firm but gentle. “You’re not ready for that. We know you’re not ready. So it’s off the table. No matter what you say, no matter how much you ask for it. Okay?”
“I have feelings for you.” It comes out before I can stop it. “For all of you. But I’m not—this is all so fast and I haven’t figured out what I want yet and people always leave and I just—”
“Hey.” He brushes his thumb across my cheek. “We’re not going anywhere. But we don’t have to figure any of that out right now. Right now we just need to get you through this heat. The rest can wait.” He leans his forehead against mine. “Let us take care of you, Tessa. That’s all. Just let us help.”
I’m crying. I don’t know when I started.
“Okay,” I whisper.
He kisses my forehead. “Let me get the others.”
He slips out of the nest, and the loss of his warmth makes me whimper before I can stop myself.
This is my body finally getting what it’s been denied for years, and it’s not being gentle about it.
The door opens. Three scents hit me at once. Leather and musk, cedarwood and honey, dark chocolate and amber. I moan before I can stop myself. My thighs clench together, slick pooling between them, and I watch all three alphas go rigid in the doorway.
“Fuck,” Milo breathes. His pupils are blown wide. “She smells incredible.”
Elijah makes a low sound in his throat, his jaw tight.
“What? She does.” But Milo’s expression is serious beneath the flippancy. “Tessa. Sweetheart. You’re hurting.”
“I need—” Another wave rolls through me and I have to grip the blanket, riding it out. “I need you to promise me. No bonding. No matter what I say or how much I beg. I haven’t decided what I want yet and I need to figure that out after, with a clear head. Not like this.”
The three of them exchange a look.
“Bonding’s off the table,” Ben says firmly. “We’re not doing that to you. Not like this.”
Something loosens in my chest.
“We’ve got you, Tessa.” Milo moves closer, crouching at my eye level. “Knotting and biting are two different things. I can give you what your body needs without bonding you.”
“And if I beg?”
“Then I say no.” No hesitation. “We all say no. And we keep taking care of you until the need passes.”
I look at Elijah. He nods once. “No biting. You have our word.”
I sag with relief. “Okay. Okay, then I need—” The next wave hits and I whimper, curling in on myself. “God, I need someone to touch me. Please. It hurts.”
Elijah moves first.
He settles beside me in the nest, his weight dipping the mattress. His big hands are gentle as he cups my face, tilts it up to look at him.
“I’ve got you,” he murmurs. “Just breathe.”
Then he kisses me.
It’s nothing like Ben’s kiss from before. Elijah kisses like he has all the time in the world. Slow, thorough, his tongue tracing my lower lip before dipping inside. He tastes like coffee and honey, and I melt into him, my hands fisting in his shirt.
He hums against my mouth—approval, encouragement—and his hand slides down my neck, over my collarbone, down to cup my breast through the flannel. I gasp as his thumb finds my nipple, circling it through the fabric until it peaks.
“Sensitive,” he murmurs. “Good.”
He pushes the flannel open and I arch into him, desperate for more contact.
When his mouth closes over my nipple, I cry out.
The sensation is electric, shooting straight to my core.
He sucks and licks and grazes his teeth over the tight peak while his hand works my other breast, and I’m writhing beneath him in seconds.
“Elijah.” I tug at his hair. “Please.”
He lifts his head, dark eyes questioning. “Tell me.”
“Lower.” I’m panting. “I need you lower.”
He holds my gaze for a moment, making sure. “You sure?”
I nod, desperate. “Yes. Please.”
He moves down my body. Presses kisses to my ribs, my stomach, the jut of my hipbone. When he settles between my thighs, spreading them with his big hands, I hold my breath.
His eyes go dark as he looks at me, and a low growl rumbles in his chest. The sound alone makes me clench.
“Elijah...”
He presses a kiss to my inner thigh, right where the slick is glistening. “Let me take care of you.”
And then his mouth is on me.
I scream.
He doesn’t tease, doesn’t make me wait. Just buries his face between my legs and devours me. His tongue drags through my folds, circles my clit, pushes inside me. He eats me out like it’s all he’s ever wanted to do, like he could spend hours between my thighs and never get bored.
He groans against me, the vibration making me shake, and his grip on my thighs tightens.
I’m already close. The heat has me wound so tight that every lick, every suck, sends me spiraling higher. My hands fist in his hair, not sure if I’m trying to push him away or pull him closer.
“Elijah, I’m going to...”
He seals his lips over my clit and sucks hard.
I shatter. The orgasm crashes through me, my thighs clamping around his head, my back arching off the mattress, my whole body shaking. Slick gushes out of me and he groans, lapping it up like he can’t get enough.
But he doesn’t stop.
He works me through it and keeps going, pushing two fingers inside me while his mouth stays on my clit. I’m so sensitive it almost hurts, but the pleasure outweighs the pain, especially when he curls his fingers and finds that spot inside me.
“Oh god.” I’m sobbing now. “Elijah, I can’t...”
“You can.” His voice is rough. “One more.”
He sucks my clit into his mouth and thrusts his fingers deep, and I come again. Harder than before, clenching and pulsing around him, screaming his name.
When he finally pulls back, his chin is glistening with my slick. He looks wrecked. Pupils blown, breathing hard, his cock straining against his jeans.
I reach for him. “But you—let me—”
He catches my hand, presses a kiss to my palm. “Later. This is for you.”
Before I can argue, Ben is there.
“My turn.” He’s grinning, but there’s heat in his eyes. “Scoot over, Elijah.”
Elijah moves aside, and Ben takes his place. He’s already shirtless—when did that happen?—and I run my hands over his chest, feeling the muscles jump under my palms.
“God, I love your hands on me.” He catches one of my hands, presses a kiss to my wrist. “Love everything about you, honestly. Have I mentioned that?”
“You might have implied it.”
“Well, let me be explicit.” He settles between my thighs, and I feel his fingers trace through the wetness there. “I’ve been thinking about this for two years. What you’d feel like. What sounds you’d make. Whether you’d let me—” He pushes one finger inside me and I gasp. “Yeah. Like that.”
“Ben...”
“You’re so wet.” He pumps his finger slowly, watching my face. “Elijah did a good job getting you ready. But I think you need more, don’t you?”
“Yes.”
He adds a second finger, stretches me wider. “There you go. That’s it. Your pussy’s so greedy sucking my fingers right in. Can’t wait to see how you take my cock.”
The dirty talk is doing things to me. Ben has always been funny, always been light—hearing him talk like this, voice rough with want, is making me wetter by the second.
“More,” I beg. “Please, Ben.”
“Shh, you can take it.” He adds a third finger and I cry out. “That’s three. Think you can take more? Think this needy little pussy can handle it?”
“Yes.” I’m rocking against his hand now. “Please.”
“So polite.” He curls his fingers, hits that spot that makes me see stars. “I like hearing you beg. Makes me want to give you whatever you want.”
He fucks me with his fingers—deep, steady thrusts that make obscene wet sounds. His thumb finds my clit, circles it in time with his thrusts, and I’m climbing fast.
“Ben, I’m close.”
“I know. Can feel your pussy clenching. You’re gonna come all over my hand, aren’t you? Make a mess of yourself?”
“Yes.”
“Do it.” He thrusts harder, presses his thumb down on my clit. “Come for me, Tessa. Let me feel it.”
I come with a scream, my whole body clenching around his fingers. He works me through it, drawing out every aftershock, until I’m pushing weakly at his hand.
“Too much.”
“Okay, okay.” He eases his fingers out, and I whimper at the loss. “God, look at you. Flushed and sweaty and fucked out. Most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”
I reach for his jeans, the obvious bulge straining against the denim. “Let me...”
“Tessa...”
“I want to.” I meet his eyes. “Please. I need to touch you.”
He hesitates. Then he unbuttons his jeans, shoves them down his hips. His cock springs free—thick and hard and leaking—and my mouth waters.