Chapter 23
Chapter
Twenty-Three
SIMONA
H endrix’s warmth seeps into my bones, his scent mixing with Dominic’s so beautifully that together they make my head spin.
This is where I want to stay, in this beautiful place where we discover little things about each other. Some of what we learn will only confirm what we feel—how perfect they are—other things will surprise us.
But of course, Brody has to ruin this too.
I can feel the trepidation in Hendrix’s body. The way Dominic leans back in his chair, his brown eyes searching mine, makes it obvious he wants answers. When I look at Ryder, he’s waiting as well.
Pulling up Dominic’s jacket so his paper and ink scent becomes more pronounced than Hendrix’s, I lean into the comfort and safety it makes me feel, closing my eyes so I don’t have to watch Ryder’s beautiful eyes darken by the burden of what I bring.
“Brody was…”
I forbid you .
My throat constricts and stops me from speaking. It’s so real, so visceral, it’s as if he is in the room with us, his hand squeezing around my throat again. Remembering his touch makes my stomach twist, and I struggle.
I hate that I am so weak I can’t just tell them everything.
I hate how I seem to constantly cry.
I hate who he has made me become.
I wasn’t lying before; I really am a mess. I’m tired. I’m exhausted from running but I can’t see a way out.
“Simona.”
I forbid you.
My eyes burst open; Dominic is right in front of me smelling like forever and looking like a man on a warpath. His fierce gaze doesn’t scare me, but it does wrap around me encouragingly.
“Right now, let’s focus on me being your lawyer. Lucky for you, I am a very good lawyer. If it is easier for you, Ryder and Hen will go, and I promise, neither will be angry or upset if that’s what you’d like them to do.”
I sink back against Hendrix, grabbing one of his arms and putting it over my shoulder like a seatbelt. An answer in itself.
No one misses it. And if anything, it makes me feel better about the action.
Dominic takes a sip of his drink. “The briefing I got from Ryder is one thing, but meeting you now, I can see you need some help. Will you let me do what I can for you?”
I agree, nodding instead of speaking. Simple statement and action on his part, but it makes me feel seen. Relief floods my system, making my heart race. He leans forward encouragingly, his body emphasising this sense of safety and comfort I get from simply being around him.
I have to physically stop myself from crawling on his lap.
He tips his head to the side, question in his eyes .
“How about you answering some of my questions, as opposed to figuring out what to tell me?”
The more Dominic speaks, the deeper I fall under his spell. I could watch him for hours—there’s detail in everything he does, and I don’t want to miss a thing. When he thinks, he squints slightly. When someone speaks, his whole body listens. It sounds odd, but that’s just it—he truly listens, not just pretends to. Growing up surrounded by falsity makes his sincerity stand out. It’s a redeeming feature—though I could say the same about his looks, his office, his clothes, everything. So far there’s not much I don’t like about him.
“When Ryder first broke into the office,” Dominic starts but his questioning gets drowned out by Hendrix’s rumbling.
I tug on his arm, drawing his focus to me rather than what is being discussed. “Do you feel me here?” I ask, pushing back against him.
I get an encouraging nod despite the gathering storm clouds making the green in his eyes nearly black, and I keep staring into them until they start to return to their normal color. “You’ve met my Alpha, and you know what kind of person he is. I want you here with me, but if it’s too much for you, I want you to go. He is my burden, and I already feel bad for dragging you into this.”
Before he answers, he pauses to think. It eases my anxiety, makes it nearly go away completely if I’m honest because his reaction is so different from Brody’s whip-quick reactions. Hendrix is deliberate, giving my words the consideration they deserve, which, in my book, adds credence to whatever he’s about to say. Making his intentions clear, he cups my face, leans down, and whispers softly in my ear.
“I know what a cunt your Alpha is. I don’t enjoy hearing things like doors had to be broken down so people could get to you. Some of what you say is going to annoy the shit out of me. I’ll swear and growl like a wolf because you are mine .”
I tip my head, ready to argue, but Hendrix chuckles, already knowing what I had issues with. His eyes twinkle in challenge. “You agreed to be mine, Simona. For the duration of our affair at least. During that time, I’ll act how an Alpha should—trying to protect and shield you from the bullshit in our world. So, forgive me if I lose my shit. I’m sure we will be able to find a way to work through our frustrations later.”
A thrill races through my system, followed by a blush that leaves my face feeling like I’ve been lying in the sun all day. But I’m not embarrassed. I am still slightly ashamed I somehow managed to talk such a strong Alpha into having an affair with me, and now after meeting his pack, I feel both better and worse for what I asked, but I think I might not have finished asking this pack for what I want.
“I got on my knees for Ryder,” I confess.
Hendrix’s eyes start to dilate. Not what I was expecting but at the same time he needed to know.
“Thank you for telling me,” he says softly. But heat keeps gathering in his eyes. “I guess I should also tell you then that this is Dominic’s favourite chair. He loves it when I kneel for him, almost as much as he loves bending Ryder over it.”
“I think I want to see both those things,” I say. The truth of my words surprises me almost as much as the fact that I said them out loud for everyone to hear.
“Such a good girl,” Hendrix growls under his breath before his eyes shift to Dominic. And then he makes it obvious he’s looking at Ryder, and his lips twist into a smirk.
“I’m cancelling this show and…”
“You will do no such thing!” Dominic’s bark rings with an edge of command.
I twist my face out of Hendrix’s touch to look at Ryder first, making sure he’s okay—he’s pouting so I guess he’s fine— before I look at Dominic. His eyes are already on me. Similar to Hendrix’s, his eyes are dark, though the lingering heat from my suggestion that I’d like to see them together is replaced by a steely resolve.
“In our house, before we play, we work. Ryder, get to your sound check and then get home. Simona will be there too.”
“What?” I gasp. Although it comes out like a breathy question full of longing.
“What does the ‘what’ refer to? The rules in our pack, or that you will be coming home with us?”
“I can’t,” I splutter.
“Hmmm, I disagree.” He leans back in his chair, looking like a cold-hearted high lord fae. But by god it’s an attractive look on him.
Blinking like an owl, I wait for Dominic to go on.
“You are already tired. By the time we’ve worked through your situation, you will be mentally exhausted. At this point, I’m not saying we’re abducting you, but I am saying you need a break.”
Hendrix squeezes gently against my side. “I wouldn’t argue. A break doesn’t have to be for long. There’s no classes for a few more days. Are your girlfriends back?”
I answer with a shake of my head, but both Alphas get sneaky in their argument, filling the air with their settling—and very tasty—scent.
“I can be home by morning,” Ryder adds.
And then I surprise myself by agreeing. “Okay. But I do want you to leave this chat, and I want Hendrix to go too. You’re both distracting, and,” I look at Dominic when I speak, “I need to speak with my lawyer.”
“The instant we finish, you know I am not your lawyer.”
“What are you?”
“That’s for us to discover together, isn’t it? I have my own thoughts on what I am to you, but I don’t want to burden you with labels.”
Hendrix chuckles, the rush of his breath against my neck feeling as significant as the when he stands and gently deposits me into the chair—sans his lap. “I know him better than I know myself, Simona. And trust me, he wants to learn everything about you—with a passion that burns if you get too close. But first, you need to ease his mind. He won’t be able to let go of why Ryder arranged this appointment. It’s one of the many reasons I love him.”
He leans down and presses a kiss to the top of my head. “You can tell me no, or you can let me know what you’d like me to make for dinner.”
It sounds perfect, the ending, I mean, but I do need to talk with someone about Brody. “Anything for dinner would be amazing. I’m not sure if I will stay the night, but I would love to see your home.”
Hendrix doesn’t say anything, but on the way past Dominic, he messes up his hair before swooping in low to kiss the rebuttal off his lips.
I blow out a slow breath as Hendrix deepens their kiss, and I deal with the flush of how good their love looks.
Dominic is glaring after Hendrix, and I suspect Hen knows, but he doesn’t stop to wait for an explanation. Instead, he shoots a wave over his shoulder before walking out the door.
Ryder is still on the screen. “Sin, you can trust Dominic.”
“I know.”
And I do know. Even before this morning, Dominic’s scent was the one thing that kept me steady in the chaos of my new life at Unity as well as some pretty dark times brought on by Brody.
I never knew who he was, but I had no doubt of his dependability .
“I’ll text you the second I walk off stage,” Ryder says with a wink before he turns to Dominic. They don’t say anything, but they share an awful lot in the way they look deeply at each other. The screen blinks to black, leaving me alone with Dominic.
He gets up, collecting the glasses and putting away his Scotch. The gentle peace of his presence is soothing, and I don’t need to ask what he is doing; he’s moving us into a different mindset. When he returns, he has a carafe of coffee for himself and a small pot of tea for me.
“I took the liberty of adding cream and sugar,” he says, placing a small table in front of me, along with the teapot and cup.
“That works.”
When he sits this time, he has a different look in his eye. If anything, it is comforting to see his professionalism shining bright. He stays reclining, giving us both lots of space. “We didn’t meet properly. I am Dominic Torres.”
And I think we both know a handshake would feel completely absurd, so neither of us move an inch. I want to though; I want to crawl up on his lap and fall asleep surrounded by his scent.
“Simona Vanderling.”
“Or, Sin, it seems.” A gentle reminder from him before he takes a sip of his coffee and opens up his notebook. “The questions I ask might come across detached, but that stems from me acting as your lawyer. If they are too much to answer, simply wave me on. If you need me to shift my persona to one more supportive, you only need to ask.”
“Thank you.”
Dominic has an intensity to him. It’s hard to describe but it feels all-consuming the way he looks and listens to me. I feel him watching, cataloguing, and learning every time we interact .
“Shall we start?” he asks, his voice starting to lose some of its inflection as he adopts a more serious approach.
I nod, and together, without prompting, we both inhale deeply. I focus on the way he holds his pen rather than his face, hoping to make this easier for the both of us.
“Ryder was concerned about a couple of things. Namely, the Alpha who isolated you from the group you were with accused you of attacking him once the security guard and Ryder were able to get inside the locked room.”
I wait for Brody’s bark to hammer submission, but my thoughts remain as free as a bird. I look questioningly at Dominic, and I can’t read him. He’s shut off a part of him, but he taps his finger on the hand I was watching as if he knows I need focus.
So, I do.
“I wasn’t joking before when I said I was a mess but that’s only because everything is so twisted up and strange. Running from Ryder was how I ended up at the hospital. It was such a shock to walk in the auditorium at Rejoice and realise Ben Franklin and Rye, the man I met on New Year’s Eve and have been chatting with online ever since, were one and the same.” I start to raise my eyes, but Dominic taps his finger to keep my attention there. “Everything is going to sound like I’m rambling.”
“And I’ll listen and take notes. What you think may be inconsequential is sometimes the key.”
Another tap of his finger, and the flood gates open. I explain in vivid detail what happened to Lydia, and the guilt I felt. Before going backwards in the timeline to talk about the remorse that has been eating me up about meeting Hendrix at Unity to our encounter at Noire where he broke off my wristband.
Tears fall but I swipe them away as I move on to how relieved I was not to have to go home, even though I should have gone to see Lawson. Eventually, I loop back to the original question and manage a handful of words about being separated at the hospital before Brody slips into my subconscious and gags me.
Everything comes to a screeching halt as Brody’s bark once again shuts me down. Inside, it feels like I slam into a brick wall so hard that every part of me hurts.
I forbid you.
Brody’s bark in my mind is made worse by my out-of-control emotions, and it becomes impossible to fight. His bark circles through my thoughts like a shark latched on to a bleeding target. It rips my resolve to shreds before it eats through my hope like acid.
I forbid you.
I hate feeling him always inside me.
I forbid you.
I hate how weak I am. Unable to fight him even though he is nowhere nearby.
I forbid you.
No one would want pieces of a person like me in their life, broken and fucked up. So mentally fragile all it takes is a memory to ruin. I’m so pathetic and anaemic in my ability to survive all I can do is pretend.
I need to get out of here.
How stupid was I to even consider telling anyone about him? Could I be any more selfish? Dumping my shit on someone else.
I stand up, unable to even lift my gaze off the floor. I can feel tears soaking my face, but they stay there for the world to see how piss weak I am. All my energy is used to find the strength to walk away. I’ll crawl if I have to. His bark once again chases everything away, leaving me searching for somewhere—anywhere—to hide. A nest tucked away from the world, where I can wait for this nightmare to end .
I can’t do this.
No matter how much I want to.
I simply can’t do or be this person anymore.
I watch, completely detached from reality as a pen and paper falls to the floor.
I’m not so lost in my head that I don’t remember where I am. I bet Dominic wishes he never agreed to meet me this morning. I can only feel relief that the rest of his pack aren’t here to see the shit show.
“Tell me, Simona.”
Dominic’s bark is like a violent clap of thunder.
It’s so loud and unexpected, it makes me scream. But his bark also breaks through my consuming panic.
Before I get a chance to think, Dominic’s scent rushes around me, holding me tight in reassurance and courage. All I can smell is paper and ink so intense I can taste the vanilla and floral sweetness on my lips as I lick them nervously.
“Tell me what it is you are not allowed to tell anyone.” Another bark.
His designation is infused within every word he speaks.
His presence shoves against mine pushing me further out of alignment, further away from Brody’s bark. Dominic’s expectation of obedience hangs in the air as thick and obvious as his scent, but how he delivered it comes from a different place. Dominic’s bark is light years away from the way Brody uses his Alpha side to commandeer.
I can feel the tremble of his hand as he stands behind me and pulls my back to his front. There’s no space between us. His scent, his touch, his designation is intimate, softly encouraging as he leans down and rests his chin on my head, but it’s also done in such a way that he overrides Brody’s hold. “Please, Simona, tell me so I can help you.”
He drops his weight, so all I can feel is him, and I lose it completely .
My legs give out. His strength holds me up.
My lungs stop working. He blows his scent in my face so it’s all I breathe.
My eyes squeeze shut, but I don’t need to see him to know he is next to me.
I scream so loud my throat hurts.
But at long, long last I finally tell someone.
“He raped me.”