Chapter Twenty – Hayden #2
Once Bradford is out of sight, I wander to the bed and flip the light off.
I crawl under the covers and lay there. I’m wide awake, replaying that conversation.
Hell, replaying everything that happened today.
I probably won’t get an ounce of sleep tonight, but that’s all right.
I’m used to it. I can function for a while with no sleep, better than the average person, thanks to my training with Alabaster Security.
I wait until midnight before I do my first check, and when it’s time, I get up without making a sound. My bare feet pad across the floor. My eyes have long since adjusted to the darkness, so I don’t need to turn on any lights on my way down the hall.
Stopping before Kayla’s door, I lean an ear against it, and when I don’t hear a peep inside the room, I carefully turn the knob to see if she locked it.
She didn’t.
I’m able to push my head inside and spot her sleeping soundly on the bed. I retreat and shut the door behind me, and then I shuffle back to my room. Two hours pass by before I do my next check.
This one isn’t as quick and easy.
This time, when I poke my head through her door to check on her, I see her tossing and turning, mumbling something under her breath. I can’t hear what she says exactly, but it doesn’t sound too good, so I slip into her room and cautiously step closer to the bed.
She cries out when I’m a good five feet away from the bed, and then she whimpers. It almost sounds as if she’s frightened for her life, like she’s having a nightmare or something.
I hesitate. Should I wake her? If she’s stuck in a nightmare, would she want to be woken up?
When she cries out again I make the decision to say her name, “Kayla.” She doesn’t respond, so I rush to the bedside and say her name again: “Kayla, wake up. You’re having a nightmare.” I lightly touch her arm over the sheet, and she finally jerks awake.
Kayla sits up and scoots away from me, and I comfort her by saying, “Shh. It’s okay, it’s me, Hayden.” The moment she realizes it’s me and not whoever or whatever she was dreaming of, her thin shoulders slump and she lets out an explosive breath.
“Oh,” she whispers, her voice a little hoarse. “Sorry, I—”
“Don’t apologize,” I tell her. “It’s okay. I heard you crying out and I wanted to make sure you’re okay.” I wait a moment before I ask, “Are you?”
She brings a trembling hand to her neck, and the action confirms my suspicion that she was dreaming of whoever did that to her.
Some family member, or whoever she lives with in that dingy place in the city.
“Yeah, I’m okay. It was just a dream.” I don’t know if she’s trying to convince herself that or if she says it for my benefit.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
Kayla shakes her head and whispers, “No.”
“Do you need anything? Water or something?”
Again, she shakes her head, and since my eyes are used to the darkness, I can see her bite her bottom lip. In any other circumstance, the gesture would be tempting, but here and now? It only shows her fear.
“Okay,” I say, slow to stand. “If you think of anything, my door is open.”
I make it to her door when she whispers, “Wait,” and the moment I hear her soft voice, I stop.
“Yes?”
“Do you think…” She trails off. She still sits up, though she no longer reaches for her throat. No, right now, she fiddles with her hands on her lap. “Do you think, maybe, you could… stay in here with me? On the floor?”
My reply comes swiftly, “If you want me to, of course I can.” If it’ll help her sleep, if it’ll make her feel better, I’d do anything. Sleeping on the floor is easy-peasy stuff.
She’s quiet when she says, “Please.”
I nod, and when I realize she probably can’t see me nod, I say, “Let me go grab a pillow and the blankets off the bed. I’ll be right back, okay?”
“Okay.” She sounds so quiet, like she’s afraid to say anything above a whisper. Then again, her throat might hurt after all that whimpering and crying out. If she wants me to sleep on the floor near her, then I’ll sleep on the damn floor.
Hell, if she wants me to sleep under her bed, I’ll do it. If she wants me to rig a hammock up in the corner and sleep there, I’d do that, too. If she wants me to be cramped in the closet, I’d do it in a heartbeat.
I’d do anything for her.
I… I’ve known it deep down for a while, I think, even before I knew she’s an omega. There’s something there, something between us. Something unspoken. Indescribable. Powerful. The kind of thing people search for and, once they find it, they never let it go.
I grab the pillow off the bed and yank the comforter and sheets off, bundling them up in my arms before I head back to her room.
In the darkness, I spend some time getting a makeshift bed ready for my night on the floor, and all the while Kayla sits and watches.
Only when I’m finished do I go to close her door.
As I return to my bedding on the floor near her, she whispers, “Thank you.”
“You don’t have to thank me.” She really doesn’t. I’d do anything for her.
I’d do anything for her, because that girl is mine.
We both lay down in our respective beds, but I don’t close my eyes and try to sleep. How could I? I’m mere feet from her. Every part of me is buzzing with the need to be closer to her—but I won’t overstep. I won’t push her. I can’t.
She makes me feel alive. Protective. Like I want to burn the world for her, just so I know she’ll be safe. She brings it out of me so easily, so effortlessly, and it calls to mind what Bradford said earlier.
She feels comfortable with me. She enjoys being around me, even if she doesn’t realize it. Having someone else notice that, having someone validate it… it’s a feeling unlike anything else in the world. It’s something you can get high off of. Addicting in the best way.
I don’t know what the future holds, but I know there is no way I can ever let this girl go. No matter what happens, I need her in my life.
I need her to be mine.