Chapter 29
twenty-nine
Xenia
Over One Year Ago
Shivering in the closet, I rock myself forwards and backwards to attempt to garner any heat; it is all that I am able to move. The power is off, it has been for a few days, but still, he hasn’t returned. My heart is heavy, my mark throbs, and my stomach growls in anger.
I am starving. Nearly to death. And I’m bitterly cold. While it is Florida, we are in the dead of winter, and the thin walls of the apartment do nothing to withhold the chill.
My mind has devolved, it has churned and spun and I do everything I can to convince myself that Tony loves me.
That my alpha didn’t forget me, he must have been held up. He is out working hard for us. He is everything I ever wanted.
The mark on my neck pulsates, but it is in pain. It never healed properly, not like it should have. Another stark reminder that our entire relationship…isn’t right.
Time passes as my mind separates from my being. I imagine that Tony is here, that we are cuddling as he whispers sweet nothings into my ear. As he helps me make up a nest. As all of the happiness in the world wraps me in its warm embrace.
A door slamming open brings me back into existence, jolts me back down to reality, but I am still in darkness.
There is both relief and terror that circulate through me.
“Xenny!” The name is slurred and pitched as he whips open the closet. The light is blinding, and I squint up blearily at him. “There’s my girl!”
My vision stabilizes, and I can see that Tony’s eyes are unfocused. I cannot help the immediate panic that claws its way up my throat.
He bares his teeth at me. He bends over, his greasy hair falling forward, the rancid smell of alcohol mixing with his syrupy scent. “My omega! Exactly where I left you!” He cackles into the air, pulling a key from his pocket.
And then he is releasing me from the restraints, but he doesn’t bother to catch me as I fall out of the closet. My body is too weak to do anything other than land on the cold floor, the hardwood digging into my cheek.
“You’re always so fucking clumsy, but while you’re down there.” And then Tony’s hand finds my hair, he yanks me up by it, strands falling to the ground around me, followed by searing agony. He presses my face against his jeans, his cock hardening.
A scratchy whine leaves my throat, my eyes watering as my dream crashes around me. Tony did not leave me here to help me.
I don’t have a choice.
Omegas never do.
“Please,” I beg. “Please, I need food.” He was gone too long this time.
He glares down at me, before pulling his leg back and kicking me in the stomach.
“A whore. My brother asked about you again. He thinks I’m not treating you well.
But you are my possession. I can play with you however I want.
And I saved you from that facility. You should be thanking me.
I house you and keep you alive. You should be grateful.
But every time I return your scent turns acrid, and you don’t even want to make me feel good.
Betrayal after betrayal.” His words slur as he reaches behind his waistband.
Betrayal.
The word is his trigger.
I know what to expect.
Tony doesn’t care if I’m alive or not.
“I’m sorry,” I blubber.
Tony presses the muzzle between my eyes. “I should just kill you. Get an omega who will understand that I am a catch. That I deserve whatever I ask for. That they are lucky to have my mark.”
Tony is a monster.
And I know with certainty if he shot me, no one would come.
He’s a Rossi.
Just as I know it is only a matter of when not if he will kill me. Every time he returns, he is just a bit more angry, loud, and aggressive.
“What if I get you pregnant? Let you grow my child? Would that fix you? Would that make you grateful?” He presses the gun further into my face.
Pregnant.
The word snaps the remaining tendrils of sanity I had been holding onto. It is a living nightmare, the thought of being attached to this man any more than I already am. The thought of him hurting my child. The thought of a child enduring this.
I am weak, I am starving, I am freezing.
But I am not broken. “I am not broken,” I whisper.
“What’s that?” Tony spits onto my face. “You certainly look broken to me.”
Not yet.
I will break this cycle. I am not my designation.
My hand lashes forward, grabbing the gun. I know it is the shock combined with his inebriated state that allows me to gain control of the weapon.
Tony isn’t even concerned when it is in my hands.
“What are you going to do Xenny? You are nothing without—”
Bang!
We are both shocked when the weapon goes off.
I don’t know if I meant to shoot him, but once I do it the first time, I can’t stop.
Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang!
The bangs are loud and deafening as I continue to fire into him. Until it turns to clicks.
Click! Click! Click! Click! Click! Click! Click! Click! Click! Click! Click! Click! Click! Click! Click!
I keep going until he is slumped on the ground, until he falls onto me, until his blood soaks into my clothes.
I attempt to push him off, I know I need to eat, to run, to escape.
But I am too weak. My reserves are gone.
I can tell when Tony dies. The unhealed mate mark stops throbbing in pain for the first time since he put it there.
And a deep wave of relief fills me up.
I am free.
Followed immediately by crippling agony.
What have I done? I killed my alpha.
“Xenia!! Oh God, Vinny she’s here, I found her. There’s so much blood.”
My eyelids are sticky as I attempt to unseal them. I am both in the most pain and the happiest I have ever been. The dichotomy of rolling sensations leaves me discombobulated, heavy, light. A feather strapped to a cannonball and launched into the sea.
Drowning?
Free?
The word comes from a dark realm of my subconscious pulling with it a memory, but then it floats further and further out of touch.
Time passes and I take myself away from here. Back to my dreamscape. To a world filled with love and warmth.
“Vinny! Marco! Help me!”
Serena. Serena is here.
My best friend.
My tummy fills with warmth, but then my blanket is being pulled from me and I shiver.
“She’s alive.” This voice is unfamiliar, but it is soft, hoarse, concerned. “How could he do this to her? She’s so young, so small. She’s covered in bruises and scars!”
“He isn’t alive. Marco, get away from her, get yourself under control. I need you to call Rocco. We must bury this. Set this up as an ambush. No one can know she was involved, she won’t be safe.” This voice is odd. Both familiar and strange.
Calloused fingers force an item from my clenched hand, I don’t mean to fight its release, but whatever it is I must have squeezed for so long I forgot I was doing so.
But once it's gone, I feel weaker. As if that was what was keeping me together, and in its absence, I am devolving.
I want to look, but my eyelids are still superglued together.
“I’ve got you.”
Serena is here. She will make sure I’m safe.
Soft arms wrap around me, tugging me up from the hard ground. Serena’s hazelnut scent intermingles with the syrup that had saturated my lungs; it is a small reprieve that I welcome.
“I’m hungry,” I say softly, snuggling into her. “Tony got busy, and he didn’t bring food again.” I know he won’t like that I’m in another alpha’s arms, but Serena is the one area I will always break the rules.
“She’s in denial.” The unsettling voice from before infiltrates my peace.
I whine and bring my hands up, cupping my ears.
“Let her be.” Serena squeezes me tightly. “I’m going to get you some food, and then we’ll get you cleaned up and changed. Everything is okay, Xenia. You did the right thing. And when you’re ready, we can talk about it. But right now, you need to heal. You are so strong.”
Her words are a bit confusing, but the warmth they instill is not.
It is just the right amount of comfort to pull me back into the soothing bliss of nonexistence. Enough to instill that I am alive and I will continue to be.
Enough.
For now.