Chapter 10
Chapter Ten
Ever since I was young, I’ve loved ice skating. From the costumes they wear to the way their bodies move through the air like they’re flying. I’ve spent countless hours watching video after video, wishing it could be me out there.
Mom was the one who ignited my love for it.
I don’t have a lot of memories of her, but I do remember sitting in her lap as we watched Olympic figure skaters perform.
Sometimes in my dreams I still hear her voice and her excitement.
She was so happy when I was finally old enough to understand what I was seeing.
Once she died, it was the only thing that made me feel connected to her.
When my town started turning the popular walkway, Hill Top Trail, into an ice skating path in the winter, I was so excited. I spent the first season falling on my ass all afternoon and then icing my sore muscles all evening. It was worth every bruise.
I wish it was indoors so it was open year-round, but I try to enjoy every moment I get out here.
Lacing up my skates for the first time this year feels bittersweet, just like it does every year. Mom never got to ice skate. She grew up in this town and never left. She died so young and was only twenty-three when she first got sick. She fought so hard for two long years, but once she was gone…
It was like she took all the light with her when she died. Joy and happiness felt unreachable. I felt guilty for every smile and every laugh.
Then I met Sable and Kai.
They saw my pain and tried so hard to help me, even though they were only kids too. They both had their own trauma. Sable was an orphan who was being raised by her grandmother, and Kai was adopted by Bee as a baby.
Maybe they recognized that similar pain in me too.
Or maybe they were just always meant to be a part of my story.
I think that’s partly why it cut so deep to have Kai cast me aside.
I thought we were soulmates, pulled together for a reason.
Sable as my platonic soulmate, and Kai as the love of my life.
I shake my head, swiping at the hot tears that start to fall.
Once my skates are tight, I move. It’s easy for me now to glide like the people in the videos I’ve always loved. I can only do a few moves, but gliding across the ice feels right. It’s like being temporarily freed of some of the weight I carry with me.
Sometimes I wonder if I could have been something great if only my mother hadn’t died and my father hadn’t abandoned me.
I could’ve taken classes and cringed at my mother’s cheering from the audience, never realizing how precious that support would have been.
Instead, the most obvious thing about me is my fucking abandonment issues.
After running away from the charity event, I came up here, hoping the rest of the town would still be occupied and I’d have the ice to myself. I was right. No one else is here, which doesn’t happen often, so I’m trying to take advantage of it while I can.
The distraction is almost working when the sound of an alpha grunting loudly cuts through my peace. My head jerks up to see Nick sliding on his ass across the ice. I stare for a long moment, confused about what I’m witnessing.
Why are Nick and Benson here? Why is Nick on his ass?
He obviously fell, but why the hell is he on the ice without skates to begin with? When did they even get here? Benson takes an unsteady step forward to help his brother, and I gasp.
One second he’s on his feet, and the next he’s on his back staring up at the cloudy sky beside his brother. I quickly skate over to them both, standing over Benson as I look down at him.
“What are you doing?”
“We came looking for you,” Nick explains as I hold my hand out to him to help him keep steady as he gets back on his feet.
Once he and Benson are both standing again, I help them back to less slippery ground, giggling at the way they grumble at each other and cling to me for support.
I’m glad they don’t fall, though, because I can only offer minimal support.
There’s no way I can lift either alpha, even when I’m not wearing skates on the ice.
“We wanted to make sure you were okay,” Benson adds as he uses a tree trunk to steady himself. “Kai’s donation—”
“Yeah, it was intense. I don’t want to talk about it.” I don’t mean to be rude and cut him off, but I really can’t talk about Kai right now. Not unless they want to see an omega have a full mental breakdown. “But thank you for checking on me.”
Nick dusts the ice off his slightly wet ass, and I smile at the sight of him basically spanking himself.
“How did you know where to find me?” I have to ask, because while I think it’s sweet that they came to check on me, I’m not sure how they knew where I was.
“You spend a lot of time here every year.” Nick shrugs a shoulder as he straightens, cheeks slightly pink.
“We were headed to your workshop next if we didn’t find you here. It clearly brings you some kind of peace to be here though, so it was a decent guess,” Benson explains.
“Oh,” I reply quietly, not really sure how to respond to that.
I suppose it wouldn’t be hard to guess where I might go to clear my head in a small town like this.
They would’ve found me eventually no matter where I was.
“Well, you found me, and I’m okay.” I lift my hands at my sides and then drop them, feeling that same awkwardness creeping in.
“You’re not, though. Are you?” Nick tilts his head as he watches me, and I have to fight my desire to turn away from him. “Rhian told us it was your dream. The donation. No matter how strong you’re trying to be right now, that was still a lot.”
“You didn’t ask us to help because it’s easy for you to fight your lingering feelings for Kai. We know this is hard for you, Plum. It’s okay not to be okay after something like that,” Benson adds.
“I can’t…” I shake my head, my throat too tight to say more.
“That’s okay, you don’t have to talk about it, but we aren’t going anywhere,” Nick says, his voice firm and reassuring.
“We’re going to stay right here,” Benson agrees with a nod. “I’ve never seen you skate before. I want to watch you, but when you’re done, you’re coming with us, okay?”
“Um…” I try to think of a way I can get out of this. The unexpected audience and whatever they’re planning. Nothing comes to mind, leaving me standing in front of them awkwardly.
“No arguing. Go skate. We’ll wait right here waiting.” Nick crosses his arms over his chest as he leans back against a tree.
“Well, okay.” I squint at them for a second, skating backward for a few feet before spinning away. Whatever, guess they’re staying. I wanted to talk to them after the charity anyway. I just didn’t think this is how it would play out. With them coming here, seeking me out.
And bossing me around…
It’s hard to focus, but I skate for a little longer, just enjoying the feel of the ice under my blades and the cool air against my skin. For some reason, having them watch me feels intimate.
This is year five of coming up here to find a little joy, but in all that time, no one has ever joined me. I mean, I’m not the only person who comes here to skate. I’ve been watched while doing a trick or had kids stare at me as I glide across the ice, but those were strangers.
Nick and Benson are far from strangers, and I can feel their eyes on me the entire time as I start to lose myself to the movements.
“Damn, Sugarplum. You look breathtaking out there,” Benson calls as I glide past them, and his compliment makes me smile.
“Like a winter fairy,” Nick adds so sincerely that I snort at the gruff alpha using such a delicate example to describe me.
I am not delicate.
When I’m done, I skate back over to them and tilt my head. “What now, boys?”
“You come with us, and we’ll take care of the rest,” Benson answers as he takes my hand.
I let him lead me. Whatever happens, things can’t get worse.
It might be time to trust these alphas—to stop trying to hide from everything and everyone.