Chapter 7
CHAPTER SEVEN
Elizabeth
K enny twisted in his seat, visibly uncomfortable even in my peripheral vision.
“Saint’s my family now,” he scraped out, then flipped open the top of his water bottle and took a long drink.
Obviously, he meant the people at Saint Security and not just the Saint family. He clearly knew Wilder’s family, but not intimately.
“And before Saint?”
He stared at the road in front of us as I followed the winding canyon down, down, down. We’d emerge soon and eventually jump on the interstate.
Clearing his throat, he wiggled around before slumping back into his chair. He was so physical about everything, it almost made me laugh. I didn’t, though, sensing he might take it personally while he was clearly feeling tender.
“Before, I was born to Mandee and Glen Carmichael of backwoods, Nevada. Grew up in a trailer big enough for three, but there were four of us.” He swiped his hands down his quads. “My brother is two years older than me.”
I waited for more. One minute, two. Nothing came.
“Guess you’re not in touch anymore?”
He laughed, but it sounded all wrong. I hadn’t been around him all that much, but it was enough to know he had a big, free laugh and a charming smaller one, and this was neither. It was closed, hollow.
“Not so much.”
“Well, I’m glad you’ve found your place in Silver Ridge. It’s kind of dreamy.”
His head snapped in my direction. “ Dreamy? ”
“Yeah. Dreamy. It’s got the small-town charm without everyone knowing everyone else’s business. And it’s cozy while still having great restaurants and shops. It’s a nice mix and, of course, the mountains are just… soul-expanding.”
I’d always felt that way about mountains. Maybe it came from growing up with Mount Rainier in my backyard or escaping to the Alps whenever I could over my years in Europe, but being near them grounded me. I’d not thought of myself as someone who needed grounding, but right now, I clearly did.
Every morning when I exited my building, I’d gaze up at the snow-covered peaks of Silver Ridge and its sisters and I felt… calm. Less frenetic and anxious about what came next.
The grounding helped me feel normal, even though whatever this was still wasn’t normal. It didn’t make sense, but I understood his point.
“I like that. Soul-expanding is exactly the way I feel about the mountains and the people there. ”
I must’ve made a sound of disbelief, though I thought I’d kept it in my head.
“You don’t think people can be like that?” he asked, adjusting in his seat so he was almost sitting sideways.
Did I think people could be soul-expanding?
Hard no.
“I’ve never met someone who makes me feel that way, that’s for sure. I mean, I love my parents and Jo… she’s probably the closest thing? But we’re still feeling our way back to how to interact in person.”
“You two have lived apart for so long,” he said, almost like he was explaining our challenge to himself.
And for some completely odd reason, I wanted to explain it.
“We have. I left when I was eighteen and she was just twelve. I didn’t mean to leave her, but I had to go, you know? I think she understood that. Or, I always hoped she did.”
She’d cried when I’d left for college, and the first time I’d called to say I wasn’t coming home for Christmas. I didn’t miss every year, but I never came home in the summers like she’d asked.
I’d always felt awful about it—the knowledge I needed to be out of the house forging my own path had helped, but the awareness that I’d left her, even for good reason, had stung.
“I doubt she understood then, but I’m sure she does now. She loves you so much and I’m sure she’s told you, but she’s so happy you’re here.”
I glanced at him to find his blue eyes looking sleepy but bright and pinned on me. He had a touch of scruff covering his face, like maybe he hadn’t bothered to shave this morning. Even a little haggard, he was gorgeous .
Eyes back on the road, I nodded. “I know. I’m glad I’m here, too.”
Intuition made me clench my teeth against what I knew would come. Then I thought better of it and jumped to change the subject right as he spoke again.
“Why are you here? Did?—”
“So, feel free to nap or whatever, and we’ll stop in a bit for a stretch.”
I didn’t look over at him again, didn’t want to see if my overt evasion disappointed him or didn’t bother him at all. Somehow, either one would be a problem, so best not to take in that data.
Best to keep my eyes ahead, focus on getting through this mission, this stretch of time outside of the familiar, and soon enough, I’d get the go ahead to return to my life.
“Oh, great. Yeah. Maybe I will close my eyes for a bit,” he said, shifting so he faced forward and crossing his long arms. He wore his jacket and in seconds, he’d snuggled down and gone to sleep.
Left to my thoughts, I focused on the road and wondered how many more topics we’d each avoid before this trip was over. The minutes plodded along and soon, the coffee I’d been sipping for the last two hours had caught up with me. As if sensing a shift in the air, Kenny moved, stretching his long arms in front of him.
He’d been still and silent since I’d shut him down. I was fairly certain he’d been fully asleep the whole time, but I wasn’t sure I’d met anyone who could just veritably roll over and conk out like that.
“Hey, how we coming?” he asked, tilting his neck from one side to the other and squinting out at the bright sunlight. We’d left in darkness and now we were in the full desert morning sun .
“We’re almost three hours in, actually. I’m about ready for a pit stop. Thought I’d find a good place sometime soon.”
Standing up sounded heavenly. We could absolutely go farther if needed, but we had all day to make this trek and there was no point in torturing our bodies if we could take it easy. Who knew how challenging the clients would make the return trip.
I was used to human variables in my line of work, but not like this. I’d never had a scenario where I’d be spending days with someone I’d never met. Usually, my job entailed a slow build with someone until they were cultivated as an official Kappa sector asset. Even this little road trip jaunt to Hollywood felt like a kind of dream.
“Sounds good. Happy to take a turn driving if you’re ready to swap out.”
He continued stretching, pulling his knees to his chest and all kinds of things I’d never seen someone do in the small space of a passenger seat. Granted, he and his EMU active-duty counterparts were known for doing whatever it took to get the job done, so I could imagine road tripping without stopping was one of many tasks they mastered. Maybe the key was passenger seat yoga.
“This looks decent,” I said, pulling into a station with a large green dinosaur sculpture. Utah really loved leaning into their paleolithic past, I guessed.
“Perfect,” he said, then jumped out while I did the same.
I rounded the vehicle and came face to face with—well, with Kenny’s butt.
He was bent over, head hanging down and hands braced on his ankles, bobbing slightly, and I was just… staring.
Thankfully, I averted my eyes as though I’d been checking the place out all along and had not, in fact, been eying the glorious thickness of his thighs or his very muscular glutes. But honestly, the man was all muscle and athleticism in a way I’d never anticipated. Of course he was fit because that seemed to be the first box ticked at Saint. Incredibly fit? Check. Stupidly handsome? Check, check.
More mature and mellow than I’d imagined? Also, problematically, check.
“One requirement before we go in,” he said, a little mischief on his face.
“Requirement?” I took orders from my regional chief and there was bureaucracy a mile long at times, but very few people told me what to do anymore. Having him do it, even in this small way, was… new.
He nodded as though what came next was wisdom and not nonsense. “Yes. Road trip requirement. You have to pick a snack you think I’ll like, and I’ll do the same for you.”
He wasn’t ordering me in any way that encroached on my autonomy or even on the mission. Instead, he was creating an opportunity, or more simply, a game. With the stakes set at “snack preferences,” I could accept, and so I did.
I chuckled, oddly pleased by this. “Ah, okay. Challenge accepted.”
He grinned. “Something makes me think you never back down from a challenge.”
I didn’t have a response to that, so I turned and made for the entrance, a bit breathless from those crystal blue eyes, the same color as the sky, pinned on me and saying things that definitely felt like a challenge in themselves.
And no. Generally speaking, I did not back down.