Chapter 26
KNOX
Fuck.
Fuck.
Fuck!
We’ve never been closer to capturing the two men and figuring out what the hell they want. I should be happy about that. Hell, I should have been on my bike with my men, running them down. Although, if anyone can catch them, Vandal will.
But there was confusion getting through the gate. A delay while people processed why the hell a truck had just screamed into our compound. At first, their attention was on Maren, not the truck that blew by once it realized where Maren had led them.
Then, another set of delays as people scrambled for their bikes and fought through the demolished gate and debris to get their bikes out onto the street.
Yet, here I stand with Maren in my arms, feeling a thousand feet tall, because it was me she ran to.
Not her father.
Me.
Because she knew that, in spite of everything, I’d protect her. Even as she tried to keep our secret and push me away. The realization sits heavy beneath my ribs as something dangerously close to pride joins the adrenaline fizzing through my veins.
Maren’s fingers clutch the back of my cut hard enough that the leather tugs across my pecs and shoulders. Her breathing is quick and uneven against my chest.
From the looks of the damage to the gate, she busted through like it was a demolition derby. I’m glad the front of her truck has bull bars. Then, I notice the rear of the truck, and my fury spikes.
“Did those fuckers try to run you off the road?”
She looks up at me, eyes wet with tears. “They hit me a few times.”
“Define hit. They beat you again?”
She shakes her head. “No. They rammed me and hit me.” Then I notice the bullet holes she’s pointing to. My heart slams to a stop. They could have killed her. I could have been reading news reports tomorrow that she’d been found dead in her vehicle.
Venom fills my veins, the frigid cold rush of it.
“Motherfuckers are dead.”
The conversation I know I’m going to have with my club is an uncomfortable one. I’ve tried to ignore the implications of what I’m doing with Maren to the best of my abilities. So, explaining it to my men is going to be tricky.
But these two men are messing with my woman.
My woman.
The words hit me hard.
And we keep missing the men who would hurt her, every which way we look for them. I think back to what North said when we hit the motel and they never came back: Miss by a minute, miss by a mile.
I release my hold on Maren, for a moment, then tug her back to me. “I know what you’re thinking, brother, that she’s a Caldwell, but just wait to hear me out when the others get back. I need you to park her truck.”
Havoc looks at me, and I can tell he’s itching for a fight. Stuck on the line between an order from me and his hatred for Maren’s father. He’d been close to Drew. Not in the way he’s close to Vandal, but Drew’s death had hit him hard.
Maren shakes like a leaf in my arms. And the mascara-tracked tears are wrecking me. Like, ruining me down to my soul.
I should be furious. About our mistakes, about the demolition of our main gate, about the fact there’s a Caldwell in my arms.
But what tightens my jaw is taking in the healing bruises on her face.
“Why didn’t you call me?” I ask her quietly, as I turn to lead her inside.
“They broke into the store. I was in the office. Then, I tried to run. I jumped out of the bathroom window.”
“Jesus, Maren.”
“When I got into the truck, my cell slipped off the seat. I couldn’t reach it and keep driving, so I…so I…”
The words become tears, the tears become sobs, and as Maren buries her head against my chest again, I grab a fistful of her hair and kiss the top of her head.
“I just knew…if I got here…you’d save me.”
Despite the dozen pairs of eyes currently watching the two of us, I almost smile. “Damn straight I would. Every single time.”
“You should get her inside, Prez.” North places his hand on my shoulder and squeezes it. I have no idea how long he’s been standing there or what conclusions he’s come to. “There’s nothing stopping those assholes circling back. Let’s get inside and make a plan to secure this place.”
But the man is shrewd. Can read between the lines.
“Come on, sweetheart. Let’s go.” I lead her up the stairs and into the clubhouse, my arm tightly around her shoulders.
A motorcycle club clubhouse isn’t friendly to strangers. There are rules. Women are fair game unless they’re claimed. That’s the biggest one. Suspicion of outsiders can run rampant. Especially for someone like Maren.
For a second, I wonder what it would feel like to walk in here, Maren beneath my arm and wearing a leather cut that declares her as mine. Have everyone accept her.
Fuck me.
Every part of me tightens at the thought of it.
I glance over my shoulder at North. “Can you make sure everyone knows Maren is my guest? Any move made against her will result in permanent removal from the clubhouse. They might still be breathing, if they’re very lucky.”
North’s left eyebrow lifts slightly. “Guest?”
I know what he’s asking. “Yes. My guest.” Not old lady.
The distinction matters in this world.
“On it. You take care of Maren, I’ll work out our defense strategy.”
I wonder what this place looks like to her.
Beneath the layer of cigarette smoke, the dark lighting, the loud rock.
I wonder if she sees the family and brotherhood.
Or if she’s mentally slut shaming the girls who walk around in little to no clothing, and the way the men reach out and touch them whenever they please.
An old-timer named Rainbow blocks my path before we make it even halfway across the clubhouse. Built like a brick wall with a beard that could hide a small animal, he has the kind of stare that comes from seeing things he’ll never forget.
He’s a Vietnam vet and has been patched in longer than most of us have been alive. He lost half his friends out on the battlefield.
“What’s she doing here, Prez?”
I lift my arm from over Maren’s shoulder to nudge her ever so slightly behind me without making a show of it. It’s instinct, more than anything; I need to keep her safe.
I find that I want to be able to bring her here. Share this place with her. And I’ll never pull that off if she’s terrified on her very first visit.
Rainbow, observant ex-sniper that he is, notices. His eyes flick past me to her and then back again.
“She came for help,” I say, holding his gaze. I wish I had a better answer. Something stronger and more compelling.
He huffs at that. “Looks like she brought trouble.”
Something irritates me in that bone-deep way you can’t ignore. “Didn’t see you jumping out of your seat to go deal with that, though, did I?”
Maren shifts slightly behind me, and I can feel the tension in her. She’s hearing every word, probably realizing for the first time how big a risk she took coming to me like this.
“Seems to me that we should be using her arrival to remind the sheriff who the fuck runs this town,” Rainbow says.
“Why don’t you sit down and let me do the thinking.”
Rainbow scratches his beard slowly. “Sounds a lot like weakness, not using her.”
“I’m vouching for her, Rainbow. Now, sit down and go back to drinking your beer. Because I’m not gonna be lectured by a man who didn’t even leave his seat when we thought we were being attacked.”
I hold his gaze. I’m not scared of this man. He might have a few inches and a lot of pounds on me, but I know I can take him in a fight as long as I don’t let him get on top of me.
Eventually, Rainbow backs down. “Hope you’ve got eyes in the back of your head, then, Prez. Because folks aren’t going to be happy to see her.”
Havoc comes up behind me and hands Maren’s keys to me. Maren’s hand is cool and clammy when I reach for it and lead her through the clubhouse. Everyone watches our every step as I guide her to my room.
“I think I should go home,” Maren says, as I unlock the door.
Shoving it open wide, I gesture for her to step in ahead of me. “Cat’s out of the bag now, sweetheart. Which means, the chips will fall as they must.”
She swipes beneath her eyes. “I don’t think that’s reassuring.”
I close the door behind me, then slam the deadbolt. “You’re safe, Maren.”
She flexes her fingers, then shivers. “I haven’t felt safe in years, Knox.”
Her words, quietly spoken, propel me to tug her back into my arms and kiss her like I wanted to in the lot. Not a kiss as a precursor to sex. But one of abject relief that she’s alive and I get to hold her again. One that reaffirms we’re both alive, and together, and…yeah, safe.
I reach for her waist and lift her up so she can wrap her legs around me. For a second, I think about stripping her, but I realize she’s wrapped her arms tightly around me and buried her head against my neck.
I hold her tight, my palms on her back.
She holds me so tightly, I wonder if she’s ever had anyone she felt she could be like this with.
Fragile. Human. Scared.
I want to be that person for her so violently, it reverberates through my bones.
If someone had hurt her, if they’d killed her, we’d have never gotten to do this again. They’d have stolen this from us, what we’re building. When someone you love is hurt, and…
Love.
Fuck.
Am I admitting I’m in love with Maren Caldwell?
I sit down on the edge of the bed before my knees give out at the shock of it. Maren’s knees hit the mattress, but she doesn’t let go.
“Maybe I should leave,” she says quietly.
“I can’t risk taking you back until those men are caught.”
She finally lets go and cups my cheeks. “I don’t mean for tonight. I mean, for good.”
“What?” The words hit me square in the chest, as if Rainbow landed a solid punch on my ribs.
She looks to the window that faces the water.
But it’s too dark to make anything out right now.
“Maybe my life would be more peaceful if I went to live in a small coastal town across the country. Rent a small property. Set up some smaller version of the marine and bait store. Sell what I have here.”
I place a knuckle on her chin and encourage her to look at me again. “Don’t do that.”
“Why not?” she asks. “My father and this club have caused so much turmoil in my life. I’m not even living my own life; I’ve carved one out around the obstacles.
I’ve tried to hold on to what I wanted to, but it’s squeezed into the margins.
And now, all this…” Tears fill her eyes again, and I would do just about anything to make it right.
“Do you realize how strong you are, Maren? I had no idea how hard your life has been. How much loss was in it. And maybe that’s the common thread between us.
We know what loss looks like. What it feels like.
And yet, we keep putting one foot in front of the other.
Don’t go. At least, not yet. Let me try to give you reasons to stick around.
Because you’ve crawled beneath my skin, and I want to keep you there.
I know this makes no sense. I know you’re scared.
But if you take everything else away—responsibilities and last names and club affiliations—if we’re just Knox and Maren and nothing else matters, we still have a chance to be happy together. ”
There. I laid my feelings out to her.
The closest I’ve ever come to admitting to someone that I’m falling in love with them.
“Knox, I—”
The hammering on the door cuts us off.
“Prez. We need you by the dock. Now!”