Chapter 10
ten
Tessa
I mpatient, Ethan doesn’t wait for the embers to die naturally and uses the shovel tool and Granddad’s old ash bucket to carry the smoking remains outside. Clutching my robe around me I stand in the doorway watching him brave the blowing snow to deposit the bucket away from the house.
Snowflakes glisten on his hair as he toes off his unlaced shoes and stalks toward me. “It’s friggin’ cold out there. I’m gonna need some help warming up.”
“You were out there what? Twenty seconds? Not my fault you wouldn’t put on your jacket.”
“Still soaked,” he says. “Kiss me.”
I brush at the snow melting on his shoulders then rise to my tiptoes to press my cheek to his. “Not here.”
His rough chuckle surrounds me as he wraps his arms around my waist. “Lead on, MacDuff.”
“Shakespeare?”
“Yeah, and I know that’s a misquote. Although lay on works even better when you think about it.”
My body heats at the implications. “When did you get so smart?”
His head snaps back and he stares down at me. “You weren’t the only one getting straight As in English. Besides, that was a scene used in a thespian competition during my college days. I could recite the whole damn thing for you. But later. There’s more pressing things on my mind.”
Mine, too. I take his hand and lead him toward my bedroom. My confidence slips when we reach the doorway. He’s the first man I’ve invited in here. What if it goes wrong?
He wiggles his fingers as he kisses just below my ear. “Be right back.”
Remaining frozen in place, I watch him enter the guest room. There’s rustling noises then he returns with a handful of condoms. Thank goodness his brain seems to be working. I hadn’t thought about protection.
“Just to be safe, honey. I was certified clean at my pre-season physical. I haven’t… uh, despite what people think about pro athletes, I haven’t been with a woman for a couple months. I need you to feel safe with me.”
It surprises me, but I do. Not only in the way he means. The safety expands to encompass all areas of my life. I need to keep him safe as well. “I haven’t been with anyone either. But I’m not currently on birth control, so thank you for being prepared.”
“That’s me. Prepared.” He hands me the small, foil packets then crowds into my personal space, gently easing me backwards into the room while slipping the robe from my shoulders. “Crawl under the covers, honey. At least until we’re both warmed up again.”
After a glance around the room, he turns on a small lamp on my dresser then closes the door and turns off the overhead. The soft glow from the corner bathes the room in sensual light. Or maybe I’m just seeing that through the eyes of someone in love.
In lust I mean. In lust. That’s it. That’s what my emotions are. I’m finally getting what I’d longed for years ago.
He’s watching, waiting for me to do as he says. I’ve been alone long enough having someone else make a decision and tell me what to do is oddly exciting. Or perhaps it’s only because Ethan is the one taking charge.
Before completely taking off the robe, I sit on the bed and remove my fuzzy socks. Holding my breath, I realize I’m hesitating to show him my thick, soft body. Maybe if the lights were all off.
He clears his throat.
It doesn’t matter what I show him now. He’s already seen my most private parts, up close and very personal. Said bits tingle and I want more. The robe drops to a pile on the floor. As gracefully as possible, and hopefully as seductively as I can, I slide under the warmth of the puffy comforter.
Once I’m settled he nods, strips, and before I have the opportunity to examine his proud cock, he’s under the covers, too. Gathering me close, he aligns our bodies and smooths his hand over my skin. That feels so good. So does the hard length captured between us. I reach between us.
At my first touch he jerks and sucks in a harsh breath. The movement allows me to wrap my hand around him. He’s thicker than my favorite toy and that worries me a tiny bit. I stroke his length. “Okay?”
I’m rewarded with his deep groan before he places his hand over mine and lifts my hand away. “Very okay. Too okay.” Then he cups my breast and while teasing my nipple, eases me to my back.
He captures my restless legs under his and rubs his cock against my thigh. “Tessa, honey. I want to take my time with you but I don’t think I can. I need to be in you.”
Everywhere his skin touches mine lights up like an explosion of fireworks. The sensations are new, powerful, and I’m not sure I’ll survive. I don’t want to survive. “I need that too.”
“We’ll do slow later.”
The condom package he grabs from the nightstand crinkles as he opens it. I don’t want to appear na?ve but I’m fascinated as he rolls it down his length.
“Like what you see, honey?” His abs flex lifting his length to my avid gaze.
“Oh, yes.”
“Are you ready for me?” He cups my mound then parts me with his fingers. I watch his face as he watches his finger slip inside me. His eyes close and a pleased smile relaxes his face. “So wet. So ready.” He opens his eyes. “Tessa?”
“I want you, Ethan. No more waiting.”
“That’s what I like to hear.”
He moves between my spread thighs and the tip of his cock brushes over my entrance. I moan and he presses forward, entering me slowly. I’ve waited for this moment literally my entire life. I shift to welcome him deeper, withholding a whimper as he stretches me.
“You’re so tight. Wet. So right for me. Relax, honey, let me in.”
I try and my thighs open wider for him. With a jerk, he’s there, stretching and filling me completely. I could reach out and touch heaven. I do, and he’s there. His mouth on mine, his body moving and creating sensations I never knew possible.
“Fuck, honey. You feel so good.”
No words happen when I try to reply, only gasps and pleading cries. He understands and adjusts his hips to a new angle. The thrust of his tongue against mine is the same as the meeting of our bodies. I wrap one leg over his hips and, oh stars, I feel even more. After tweaking my nipple he circles my clit.
Every atom within me swirls, dancing in tighter circles focused on how he plays my body. I’m flying, stretching, reaching for the unknown.
Ethan groans and his thrusts are faster, erratic. “Won’t last… long…come…for me.”
“With. Only with.” My body doesn’t wait and my orgasm bursts over me. While my throat vibrates with a nearly silent scream, he shouts my name and presses our hips deep into the mattress. I feel the pulsing and wish he was coating my inner walls with his release.
As our breathing calms he presses his forehead to mine and kisses the tip of my nose. “There’s no words.”
Doubt rears an ugly head. “I did okay?”
“Perfect. This was, you were, no, you are perfect.”
I make my confession in a whisper. “I was worried since this was my first time.”
“Yes. Our first time, honey.” He lifts his head and looks at me, his eyes filled with so many emotions. “But definitely not the last.”
“Not what I mean. Yes, first time with you. Also, my first time with any man.”
My words take a few moments to sink in and his expression darkens. “You’re telling me the truth?”
“Yes.” I rush to explain and my words tumble over each other. “Oh my stars, Ethan, I’d never lie. Not about this. I had a crush on you in high school. I dreamed of being with you. Of giving you my virginity. I’ve never wanted to share this with anyone else. Guess it took longer than I expected.”
“Fuck, Tessa. You should have told me. I would have been more careful. I would have… something.”
He holds my gaze and I can almost see the gears and thought processes working in his brain. It’s what he’s working out that frightens me. I could have just scared away the only man I’ve ever loved. Pretty sure he’s also the only one I will ever love. I ache to tell him but that would surely scare him away.
“Tessa, my sweet, sweet girl. You’ve given me something precious. I’ll find a way to make up for tonight not being as special as your first time making love deserves.”
“You don’t need to do anything?—”
His tender kiss ignites a new need and I wrap my arms tight around him. His cock twitches and I moan.
“Honey, I’m sorry. I… here, hold my hand while I pull out. You’re probably going to be tender. Dear god, no wonder you’re so tight. And no, that’s not a bad thing. It’s good. So good.”
He doesn’t give me a chance to argue, and I do wince as he leaves my body.
“You stay here and I’ll be right back,” he says as he slips from the bed and walks awkwardly toward the door. Imagining him holding on to the full condom as he walks makes me grin. He disappears into the bathroom. Is this going to be the aftercare I’ve read about in romances? I don’t care. As long as he comes back soon.
The muffled sound of running water precedes his return. “Okay, honey, we’re going to relax and soothe your tasty bits.”
“Tasty bits?”
“Hmm.” He slides one arm under my knees and wraps the other around my shoulders. “Yep, that sweet clit and honey, you taste like ambrosia when you come.” He lifts me and turns from the bed.
“Ethan, you can’t carry me like this.”
“Why not?”
“I’m too heavy.” I want to wiggle until he puts me down except he might drop me instead. I stay still and circle his neck with my arms.
“You’ll never be too heavy for me, honey. Tessa, please. Let me take care of you.”
There’s more than just the promise of this moment in his tone, but I don’t dare allow myself to hope. He’s here until he can get his truck towed. That’s all the time we’ll have. Then he’ll be off to Boston or wherever. I know how this story progresses. How it will end. I’ll have wonderful memories to sustain me.
“Okay,” I whisper then kiss his shoulder.
The warm scent of vanilla fills the bathroom. He’s running water into my tub creating a rising mountain of bubbles that are collapsing over the tub edge. “How much bubble bath did you use?”
He glances at the tub. “Uh, too much?” He bends toward the tub. “Test the temperature. Is it okay?”
“If I can find the water,” I laugh. He lowers me a bit further and I discover the nearly perfect temperature for a soak. “It’s good. You can put me down now.”
He does. Right into the tub. It’s a good thing I put in an extra-large and deep tub when I remodeled so there’s no water splashing over the edge as I settle.
“Scoot forward.” With his hand centered between my shoulders, he gives a gentle push. Once I’ve moved, he climbs into the tub, then reaches around me to turn off the water. “Now lean back against me, honey.”
He rests his palms against my stomach and sighs. “How does this feel?”
“Like heaven.”
Swiping one of my old, soft washcloths over my skin, he slowly, carefully washes my entire body. He pays extra attention to my nipples before moving lower to cup and massage my mound. He rains kisses along the length of my neck and over my shoulders. Rising against my butt, his cock grows firm. We’re both breathing hard and I’m ready to straddle his lap and impale myself. “Ethan, please.”
“Please what, honey?”
“Can we do it again? Have sex, I mean.”
He nips my neck. “Yes, my sweet girl. Except we’ll be making love.”
Once we’ve splashed our way out of the tub and partially dried each other, he faces me and plays with the damp ends of my hair, softly tugging me toward the door. My body feels loose and relaxed in spite of my desire for him and I barely focus on his words.
“First one back in bed gets to choose the position.”