Chapter 21
KYLIE
Icould stay here forever. Patrick made me feel so safe and seen. It was scary. I still might be fired, sent to jail for stealing company secrets or worse, but right now I didn’t care.
Unfortunately, my bladder did. I squirmed on his lap, which was not a good idea. He hardened against my hip.
“Kylie,” he whispered.
“Um.” I couldn’t form words.
“Do you have to use the potty?”
I groaned, but he was right. Mortified wasn’t a big enough word.
“I’m sorry.” I lifted my head. My stomach embarrassed me further by grumbling like a freight train.
“And hungry, too.” I rubbed my stomach. He chuckled, but lifted me and set me on my feet. I wiped my face. The tears had dried up, but the embarrassment lingered in the air.
“Go ahead.” He pointed to the door behind his desk. “I’ll order us some food.”
I couldn’t possibly eat. My stomach was too tied up in knots to digest food.
I thought the tears would make me feel better, but they didn’t.
Ugh, I hated having such big emotions. He remembered when the Spanish operation ended.
In the books it was a huge success, but the two girls whose lives ended was too high a price to pay.
They made a sacrifice they didn’t ask to make.
It was hard to rationalize that if we had never been there, they might still be alive.
They’d be living in a hell on earth I couldn’t fathom, but they’d still be alive. But what was worse?
I flipped the switch on in the bathroom. The white tile was blinding. Did he really just use the word potty? Cringe.
I finished up and approached the mirror to wash my hands.
The image staring back at me confused me.
Of course, it was me. My hair was coming out of the carefully crafted professional ponytail from this morning.
My eyes were red, my cheeks blotchy, my insides were a swirly mess, and I could burst back into tears any minute.
I couldn’t believe I had any more tears left to shed. My stomach growled again.
I hadn’t eaten since early this morning. Too nervous for my first real outing with the girls. An outing I'd messed up royally. I guess that won’t be happening again.
To top all this chaos off, the gorgeous, sexy man in the other room confessed he had feelings for me…
or has feelings for me? I wasn’t sure it was in the past tense.
I wouldn’t blame him if my actions turned him off.
Not that we could be together, anyway. I had betrayed his family.
The Grants weren’t the mafia, but loyalty was important, and lying was damning.
I pulled the band out of my hair. My blond hair fell around my shoulders. I washed my face and dried it. Besides the waterproof mascara, all my makeup was gone. Color had returned to my cheeks. I still looked young and felt vulnerable and little.
It was time to face my punishment.
I returned to Patrick’s office. He sat behind his desk.
He pointed to the chairs opposite. “Dinner will be here soon. Have a seat.”
“You sound so serious.” I wrung my fingers and slid into the deep leather chair.
“Before our food gets here, I wanted to give you a chance to ask me questions.”
“Okay.”
“The honesty pledge applies to me as well, so anything you want to know about your time here, I’ll be happy to answer.” He tapped something on his phone and then set it down on the desk, face down.
“Was I always monitored and recorded?” My mind ran through some conversations and phone calls I had made in the last month. Nothing embarrassing, but you can never recall exactly what you say.
“Yes, but that’s no different from any other employee.
” He leaned forward. “All company computers are monitored. We set up keywords that trigger alerts. Facial recognition also warns us when an employee gains access or attempts to access unauthorized areas. Cameras are everywhere. We are also a security tech company. None of that should be a surprise.”
“The bathrooms are monitored? And my room?”
“No employee rooms and no bathrooms anywhere.” He chuckled. “Just hallways. Offices are safe, too, but if you are on the company computers, using company phones, those cameras can be turned on and off with authorization.”
“I used my laptop in my room.”
“And it was never recording you or invading your privacy.”
“Not like I have anything exciting to look at.”
His forehead wrinkled. “Was that a comment on your lack of a social life or a derogatory statement about you personally?"
“Why?” I leaned forward. “Does it matter?”
We gazed at each other. Before he could answer, a knock came at the door.
“Come in.” Patrick stood and greeted the staff member carrying a bag. The smell hit me two seconds later. It was something fried and greasy. Yummy.
“Thanks, Peter.” He grabbed the bag and brought it back to his desk. He took the black plastic containers of food out one at a time. I peered at the one closest to me; the piping hot fries fogged up the clear plastic lid.
I reached for it, but pulled my hand back.
“Dig in.” He gestured toward the fries.
I peeled the top off and snatched a fry. The salty, hot food satisfied my stomach. The other container included chicken tenders and several smaller containers of ranch dressing and honey mustard. Patrick grabbed two bottles of water and set one in front of me.
I took a sip. I hadn’t realized how thirsty I was and took a big gulp.
Patrick sat down, and we shared the container of chicken tenders, but the fries were all mine. I stopped myself from dancing after every bite, but the flavor was too good. My soul needed some joy at that moment.
I had ordered this same meal every few days since I arrived. I glared and shook my head.
“What?”
“Cameras must have picked up on my preferred meal. Seems like a waste of such an expensive surveillance system.” I licked the sauce off my lips. “Does it compile how often I went to the chicken place and clued you in on the best food choice to put me at ease in this uncomfortable situation?”
“It could, but I gained this knowledge by utilizing a much more reliable and accurate system of discovery.” He grinned.
“And what is that?”
“The team meal after the training session last week.” A smirk touched his lips. “You ate your weight in fries and chicken tenders.”
I smirked back. “Old school. Smart.” I tapped my temple.
“Most reliable surveillance I’ve taken part in.” He took a sip of his water. “I pay attention.”
Those eyes bored into me as if they had a lot more to say, but thankfully he said nothing. I wasn’t quite ready to hear my fate. I savored my food. I was certain it would be my last meal here.
“Can I ask you a question?” He wiped his hands on a napkin.
“Another reliable tool to extract information.” I gave a curt nod.
“Unless the subject lies.” It felt as if his eyes could see right through me. “But we are in a zone of honesty at the moment.”
“Of course.”
“If it’s too personal, then you don’t have to answer.” He cleared his throat. “Your parents. What do they think about your job in law enforcement and about your working for us?”
I wasn’t expecting that question. “Didn’t you learn all about them during my security check?” My snark was in full force. It was getting harder to control. His questions weren’t really personal, but it threw me.
“Facts, stats.” He met my snark with his own. “I am asking you how they feel.”
“I don’t know how they feel.” I shrugged. “They love me. Hate what I do. Feel like I’m chasing a ghost. They wanted me to stay in North Carolina. Get married and give them grandchildren.”
My parents and I were cordial to each other.
I don’t visit enough for my mom. My father and I keep our conversations surface level.
He finds it hard to look at me because I look so much like my sister.
His first born. I stay away because it’s easy for all of us to deal with.
Especially when we still did not know what had happened to her.
“Have you always wanted to be in law enforcement, or was that in response to your sister going missing?” he asked between bites of chicken.
“I always wanted to help people and protect people, but wasn’t sure how.” He conjured up all my insecurities with a simple question. “When the FBI recruited me, they made a convincing argument. It’s nice for such a historic organization to admit they wanted me for my mind.”
“You have an interesting mind. Obviously you’re an intelligent w- …” He paused before finishing his sentence, “person.”
I finished the last bit of chicken on my plate and downed the rest of my water. My reprieve was over. It was time to get down to business.
“So, what now?”
Patrick stood and cleared off his desk. He dumped the containers in the trash. He took a paper napkin with the chicken place’s logo on it and wiped down the surface. I hadn’t noticed he was a clean freak. I watched him work, making sure his desk was back in order.
“Do you want to clean my sticky fingers, too?” I held them out. He stopped adjusting his laptop and stared at me. A weird twitch of his lip made my insides drop. Like he was thinking about it and really wanted to.
“You can use this.” He reached into the last of the bag and retrieved a wet wipe and tossed it in my direction. It skidded across the desktop. I stopped it before it fell, wiped my hands, and stood to discard it in the trash.
Instead of sitting behind the desk, Patrick sat next to me in the chair to my left. He angled himself in my direction. I mimicked his posture.
If I didn’t know any better, I would think Patrick was stalling. Like he didn’t want to do what he had to do. But I knew the outcome of my actions, and I knew he knew it too.
Why didn’t he get it over with already?
“Do you still believe Grant Enterprises is some criminal organization engaging in sex trafficking?”
“Not really.”
His eyes narrowed.
“I mean, no. I don’t think that, but I still have some questions.”
“Do you want to continue working here?” Something strange developed on his face. It almost looked like hope.
“I don’t think anyone wants me working here after what I did.” I sighed. “But the Dandridge news really makes me feel like I made a difference. You know how long it takes to act on a tip at the FBI? Months. My first genuine lead produced results, and I hope I get the chance to do it again.”
“That’s good to hear, but you did break the rules.”
“Yes, sir.”
“Well, around here, when someone breaks the rules, there are consequences.” He crossed his arms over his chest.
I swallowed. “What kind of consequences?”
“Well, obviously, they’re different depending on a person’s position.” The twitch on his lip became more pronounced. “Since I created your current position, there isn’t really a precedent for consequences for misbehavior.”
“You’re just making it up as you go along.”
“Exactly. So, I have a proposition for you.” He slapped his hands together.
I flinched. “What is it?”
“Obviously, you explain and apologize to Rayna, Tinley, Kyler, and Josh.”
The ball in my stomach instantly doubled in size. “They won’t forgive me.”
“Maybe not right away, but coupled with the rest of your punishment, it will give them a better idea of what a repentant little girl you are.”
“Little girl,” I whispered. He reached out and steadied my wiggly fingers with his hand.
“There are multiple ways for a little girl to be punished, and the best part of punishment is that when it’s over, all is forgiven.” He squeezed my hand. “What do you think about that?”
“You want to punish me like a little?”
“I know it’s not conventional.”
“Or appropriate in the workplace.” I looked toward the door, wondering why my legs weren’t itching to bolt.
“True, but like I said, I made up this job for you. I make the rules.” His voice had shifted, dropping into a tone that was pure Dom, and my insides clenched in response. Was I really considering this? I barely knew him.
My hands covered my face. My cheeks were giving me away. I didn’t hate the idea, but it was nuts, right? It was highly inappropriate for a boss to reprimand an employee in this manner. I nodded my head ever so slightly.
I opened my mouth to answer him.
“Wait.” He held his hand up. “This is not something I want you to decide immediately. I want you to think about it. Go back to your room, relax. Then, if you want to submit to my punishment, meet me at Quad IV at ten thirty.”