1 #3
“It means nothing to me, Jez, nothing if I can’t trust you.
I gave you everything and you’ve betrayed me.
Everything we had has crumbled away. I can’t get over this.
I don’t want to. I’m a jealous person as it is – you know that.
You know how I am. You managed to make me believe that I could trust you.
How will I ever believe what you say to me ever again? I have to go, get away…”
Dani pushed past him and ran up the stairs, collecting the remaining packed bin liners, and left them at the bottom of the stairs.
She pulled on her biker boots and opened the front door.
The blast of cold air hit Dani and she shivered.
She quickly packed her belongings into her car, squashing them into the small boot and piling the rest on the passenger seat.
Dani ran back into the house and up the stairs as Jez stood immobile in the hallway.
She took one last look around the bedroom.
The Coldplay CD was still playing as she left the room and came down the stairs.
Jez stood in the hallway, rubbing his face as he watched her move through the lounge and then the kitchen.
Dani looked on the windowsill and spotted her green orchid that Chloe had sent her for her last birthday.
It was budding again. She lifted it off the windowsill and carried it through to the hallway where Jez was sitting on the stairs.
“Where will you go?” he asked softly as he stood up.
“I’m not sure.”
“Then stay tonight. Let’s talk it out, Dani. Please don’t go like this. It’s late…” he pleaded as he moved swiftly over to her, his hand reaching out to touch her stony face.
Dani jerked back and Jez’s hand dropped. “Good bye, Jez.”
“Jesus, Dani, don’t leave like this. After five years, we can’t just be over!”
Dani clenched her eyes shut, not wanting to see the devastation in his handsome face. “I can’t stay… I just can’t.”
“Dani, I love you. Please don’t leave me.” His fingers touched her arm and Dani felt her tears prick the back of her eyes again. She had to leave and leave now.
“You didn’t love me enough. I needed that. Someone who only needs and wants me.”
She turned away and walked towards her car, clutching her orchid. She slipped into the car and started the engine. Dani pulled out onto the road and drove away without looking back, her tears falling freely down her cheeks.
DANI DROVE TOWARDS TWICKENHAM and the M3 so that she could join the M25.
Dani wasn’t very good at getting around London, so she pulled into a service station and programmed her GPS.
Thank God her car was fitted with one. She filled up with petrol and bought some cigarettes.
It would take her at least four hours to get up to Leeds.
She looked at her clock. It was nearly eleven.
If she called Chloe now, they’d have to stay up until she arrived at three or four in the morning.
Dani didn’t want to put her out. She knew Chloe slept early because of the children.
Rosie wasn’t two yet and still woke up in the night.
Dani decided she’d set off, then stop half-way up.
Nap in the car and get up to Leeds around seven. At least they’d be up by then.
Dani pulled out of the service station and headed towards the M25. Her tears pooled in her eyes as she tried desperately to calm down. Her hands were shaking and the shock of what had happened began to dawn on her.
She’d left him. She’d left Jez. In her eagerness to get away, she hadn’t really appreciated what that meant. She was hurt and angry, which had resulted in her impulsive decision to leave. It meant she was leaving everything behind: her home, her job, her life.
Tears fell, blurring her vision, and she knew she really shouldn’t be driving.
She blinked hard encouraging them to fall.
At the age of twenty-five, she’d have to start over again, when she’d hoped that she would now be looking forward to the next chapter in her life.
Dani pulled over on the hard shoulder and rummaged around for a tissue.
She roughly dried her eyes. Her phone buzzed and she knew Jez was trying to call her.
She reached into her bag and looked at the screen.
His photo flashed across it – a picture she’d taken of him resting his chin on his hands, propped up on the bar.
He was smiling his sexy smile and Dani’s heart broke at the image of him.
Fresh tears rolled down her face. If she answered, he’d convince her to go back.
She just couldn’t. Cheating was a deal breaker.
She shut off her phone and dropped it back in her bag.
Dani shifted her car into gear and continued to head towards the M25, deciding to stop at the first service station and pull over for a nap.
She suddenly felt bone weary. Her head was pounding from the crying.
She checked her GPS. The next service station was on the M1.
With any luck, she’d be there in an hour.
IT WAS STILL DARK as Dani drove into Leeds City Centre.
It was six thirty. The early morning traffic was still light.
Dani turned onto the inner ring road and followed the signs towards Harrogate, glad she had her GPS.
She’d only been up to Leeds by train since Chloe had moved up, so the roads were unfamiliar.
Dani yawned as she stopped at traffic lights, her head pounding from lack of sleep, crying, chain smoking and numerous cups of coffee she’d drunk on the way up.
She’d been driving for almost three hours after she’d taken a restless nap in the service station.
Her neck was stiff and she was feeling light headed.
She looked over to her phone and reluctantly switched it on.
She knew there’d be numerous messages from Jez.
The traffic lights changed to green and Dani pulled off and drove towards Harrogate Road.
It was still too early to call Chloe. As her phone connected to her network, ten messages beeped through and Dani’s eyes filled with tears again.
It had taken her the first couple of hours of the journey to calm down, but now she just felt an overwhelming sense of loss.
She glanced at the passenger seat crammed with her belongings.
After five years with Jez, all she had was her car and the black bin bags full of her clothes and possessions.
Dani roughly dried her eyes with a tissue she’d been holding the whole journey.
She stopped at another set of traffic lights and looked around.
There were a few shops along the street, and further down, she could see a small grocery shop that seemed to be open.
Once the lights changed, Dani pulled into the small parking area in front of the open shop.
To her delight she saw that it was a small Jewish bakery too.
Dani checked her reflection in her visor mirror.
Her eyes were bloodshot and puffy from the crying and she looked drawn.
What the hell, no one knew her here anyway; she thought as she flipped back the sun visor and stepped out of her car.
The smell of freshly baked bagels wafted through the street.
Dani took in the smell and pulled her biker jacket tighter around her.
The air was icy cold. She was still wearing her halter top and skin tight trousers.
Dani shuddered as she headed for the door.
Within fifteen minutes, she was back in the car driving up towards Harewood, past all the huge houses with their perfectly tended gardens.
It was really quite beautiful, even in the dark and only lit by the street lights.
All the houses were floodlit, showing off their different facades.
Dani munched down on her bagel as she headed past the entrance to Harewood house.
Nothing like a hefty dose of cream cheese-covered bagel to lift your mood, she thought.
Dani looked at the time; it was seven fifteen.
She pressed her speed dial for Chloe’s mobile and waited for it to connect.
“Hello, Dani?” Chloe answered, her tone clearly baffled as to why her sister was calling her so early in the morning.
“Hi, Chloe.” Dani’s voice was shaking as she spoke.
“Dani, are you alright?”
“No, I’m not. I’m about five minutes away.”
“What? What do you mean?”
“I drove up through the night. Jez and I broke up.”
“Oh crap! Dani!”
“I’m sorry to spring this on you but I just…” Dani’s voice broke. Saying it out loud made what had happened real.
“Don’t be silly. Just get here. You know the way?”
“GPS.” Dani let out a stifled sob.
“Okay, good. See you in a bit.”