Chapter Eleven #2
“Good girl.” The praise in his voice sent unexpected heat through her body. “Now, I’m going to kiss you again. And while I do, I’m going to start undressing you. If you want me to slow down or stop, you tell me. Do you understand?”
“Yes.”
His mouth claimed hers again, softer this time but no less intense.
His hands moved with surprising gentleness, finding the fastenings of her costume, loosening laces and ties with practiced ease.
Ashley felt the layers of her gypsy costume begin to fall away—scarves, skirts, the embroidered vest—until she stood in just her shift and corset.
“You’re beautiful,” Raven murmured against her mouth, his hands spanning her corseted waist. “So damn beautiful, and I’ve wanted this—wanted you—for so long.”
“Then have me,” Ashley breathed back. “Please, Raven. I need—”
“I know what you need.” His voice was pure seduction.
“And I’m going to give it to you. But first, we need to establish some things.
This isn’t going to be gentle or conventional.
I’m going to tie you up with your own scarves.
I’m going to take my time. And you’re going to surrender to me completely. Can you do that?”
The question hung in the air between them, weighted with significance. This was her last chance to retreat, to insist on something more traditional. But looking into Raven’s eyes, seeing the desperate hope mixed with fear, Ashley knew this was exactly what they both needed to achieve their goals.
“Yes,” she said firmly. “Show me everything. Don’t hold back.”
The transformation in Raven was immediate and breathtaking. The careful, controlled duke melted away, replaced by something darker, more primal. His hands moved with new confidence, gathering up the colorful scarves that had decorated her costume.
“Hands out,” he commanded softly, and Ashley complied, her heart racing with anticipation and a bit of fear.
She felt the silk sliding around her wrists, binding them together with surprising skill. Not tight enough to hurt, but secure enough that she couldn’t free herself. The sensation of being restrained, of surrendering control to her husband, sent a thrill through her body that she hadn’t expected.
“How does that feel?” Raven’s voice was low in her ear, his breath hot against her skin. “Tell me honestly.”
“Strange,” Ashley admitted. “But also…exciting. I feel exposed but safe at the same time.”
“Perfect.” He pressed a kiss to her shoulder. “That’s exactly how you should feel. Vulnerable, but trusting that I’ll take care of you. Because I will, Ashley. I’m going to take such good care of you.”
His hands moved to her corset, unlacing it with efficient fingers. “I’ve imagined this so many times,” he confessed as the garment loosened. “You, bound and bare before me. Mine to touch. Mine to pleasure. Mine to possess completely.”
The possessiveness in his voice should probably have alarmed her. Instead, it sent heat pooling low in her belly. She’d spent three months feeling unwanted, and now her husband was looking at her like she was the most desirable thing in the world.
The corset fell away, leaving her in just her thin shift. Raven stepped back slightly, his eyes raking over her with such hungry appreciation that Ashley felt her nipples tighten in response.
“God, Ashley.” His voice was reverent. “You’re perfect. Absolutely perfect.”
Then he was kissing her again, deeper this time, his hands roaming freely over her body while hers remained bound in front of her. The restriction only heightened every sensation—the heat of his mouth, the strength of his hands, the solid warmth of his clothed body pressed against her nakedness.
“Gorgeous,” he murmured against her lips. “I need you on a bed. Now.”
He scooped her up easily despite the restraints on her wrists, carrying her to the large four poster bed. Raven laid her down on it with surprising gentleness.
For a moment, he simply stood there, looking down at her—his wife, bound and breathless, her hair wild around her shoulders, and her womanhood exposed. Ashley felt herself flush under his intense scrutiny, but she didn’t look away.
“I need you to understand something,” Raven said as he walked and ensured the bedchamber door was locked, his voice rough with emotion.
“This isn’t just about physical pleasure for me.
It’s about trust. About you surrendering control and me being worthy of that surrender.
About being completely honest with each other in a way society never allows. ”
“I understand,” Ashley whispered. “And I’m not afraid, Raven. I want this. I want you.”
He removed his coat with deliberate slowness, then his waistcoat, his cravat. Each piece of clothing revealed more of the man beneath—broad shoulders, muscled chest, the evidence of his desire straining against his breeches. By the time he was bare from the waist up, Ashley’s mouth had gone dry.
He was magnificent. And he was hers.
“Now,” Raven said, climbing onto the bed beside her, “let me show you exactly what I’ve been dreaming about for three months.”
His hands moved, and with another scarf, he tied her hands to a ring in the bedhead.
She was now stretched below him like a sacrificial offering.
Slowly he pushed the fabric up her legs, over her hips, bunching it at her waist. Ashley gasped at the sudden exposure, her bound hands preventing her from covering herself.
“Don’t hide from me,” Raven commanded gently. “I want to see all of you. Every beautiful inch.”
His hands stroked up her inner thighs, and Ashley couldn’t suppress her whimper.
She’d never been touched like this before.
The scandal that had ruined her reputation had been a lie, but she couldn’t think about that now, not with Raven’s hands on her skin, his eyes dark with desire.
But a little voice was screaming she should tell him.
He probably thought she wasn’t an innocent but if she told him, he might stop.
“So responsive,” he murmured, his voice like velvet. “I’ve dreamed of this, Ashley. Of having you like this, trusting me completely.”
His fingers traced patterns on her skin that made her gasp and arch. Every touch was deliberate, controlled, designed to build pleasure slowly. He was in no rush, taking his time to learn what made her whimper, what made her breath catch.
“I’m going to make you feel things you’ve never felt before,” he promised, his mouth trailing kisses along her jaw, down her throat. “I’m going to take you apart slowly, piece by piece, until there’s nothing left but pleasure.”
Ashley believed him. Her body was already singing under his touch, sensation building in ways she’d never experienced. When his hand moved higher, more intimate, she gasped at the unfamiliar feeling. But it was—indescribable.
“Usually, I’d blindfold you and…but we will leave that for another time.”
She watched his eyes as he lowered his mouth to hers for a long kiss, but he didn’t oblige her. The kiss was too short—not that she could complain, as his mouth found so many other inventive things to do on her neck, her shoulder, her breasts, her belly . . .
He pushed her legs apart and kissed her inner thigh. Ashley held her breath. She had heard of this. Married women speaking in hushed tones of what they had read—or experienced. She wondered what else Raven could show her in the dimness of his bedchamber.
And then she wondered nothing at all because his tongue was on her, in that most intimate of places, and she could do nothing but let the sensuality wash over her and try to keep from sobbing with pleasure.
She’d never known pleasure could be like this, especially with a man she’d never wanted to marry.
Nothing like this white-hot spiral of sensation coiling in her belly and radiating out her arms to her fingertips, her legs to the smallest toe. She thrashed about, hearing her own hitched cries echoing in the dim light of the fire, but Raven gave her no quarter.
She didn’t want his mercy. She wanted him.
Finally, the tight spiral exploded, and she arched and cried out. She feared the household would hear her. There was no question that Raven had. She closed her eyes, her whole body sated and exhausted. But he wasn’t done with her yet.
He came over her once again and kissed her. She could taste herself on him and she shuddered as his knee pushed her wide open, so he fitted perfectly between her thighs.
“I want you,” he murmured in her ear as his lips trailed over her throat and back to suckle her breast. And with one thrust he entered her.
At her cry, Raven stilled immediately, his eyes finding hers with sudden sharp focus.
“Ashley?” His voice held a question; confusion mixed with dawning realization.
“Don’t stop,” she pleaded, but she saw understanding flood his expression.
“You’re—” He broke off, his hand trembling against her skin. “Ashley, have you never—?”
“Please,” she whispered, tears pricking her eyes. “Please don’t pull away now. I want this. I want you.”
But Raven was already moving, his hands going to the silk scarves binding her wrists. He freed her with quick, efficient movements, then pulled her into his arms, holding her against his chest while his heart thundered beneath her ear.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” His voice was rough with emotion. “Ashley, you let everyone believe—the scandal that ruined you—”
“When has society ever cared about the truth?” she finished quietly.
“The story is not mine to tell, but I swear to you it was not I this gentleman tried to elope with—I was merely trying to save…someone, but the consequences were quite dire. I could not allow this person to be hurt, so I did what I needed to do, even if it made people think the worst of me. I was stronger. I had the protection of my brother, a marquess. Wolf and Rockwell to this day don’t know the full story. ”
Raven’s arms tightened around her. “And you’ve spent three years carrying that burden alone? Being punished for something you didn’t do?”
“It doesn’t matter now.” Ashley pulled back to look at him, seeing the turmoil in his eyes. “What’s done is done. I just want to be a good wife and have lots of children.”
He cupped her face in his hands, his thumbs brushing away tears she hadn’t realized were falling. “I’m not pushing you away. But Ashley, your first time—it should have been perfect. Not rushed. Not with you tied up because I couldn’t control my—I could have been gentle.”
“This is perfect,” she interrupted fiercely. “This is you finally being honest with me. Finally showing me who you really are. That’s more perfect than any conventional deflowering could ever be.”
“You say that now, but—how would you know?” He laughed, the tension easing.
“I mean it.” She caught his hands, holding them against her face.
“I’ve spent three months wondering why my husband wouldn’t touch me.
Thinking I wasn’t desirable enough, wasn’t worthy.
And now I finally understand—you were protecting me from yourself.
But Raven, I don’t need protection. I need honesty. I need you. And I want our child.”
She saw the war playing out in his expression—desire battling with protective instincts, need fighting against his deeply ingrained shame about his preferences.
“I want to do this properly,” he said finally. “Make love to you, gently for your first time, the way you deserve—”
“No.” Ashley’s voice was firm. “I just want real. I’ve had enough secrets in my life. It would be nice not having to hide things in my marriage.”
“Ashley—”
“Show me,” she whispered, her hands moving to his chest, feeling his racing heart. “Please.”
For a long moment, Raven simply stared at her, conflict evident in every line of his body. Then, slowly, she saw his resolve crumbling. Saw desire win over fear, need triumph over shame.
This time he laid her gently on the bed, no restraints or masks. Just the two of them.
Much later, as they lay tangled together in bed, Ashley felt fundamentally changed. Her body ached in unfamiliar ways, but it was a pleasant soreness, a reminder of everything they’d shared. Raven held her close, one hand stroking her hair with surprising gentleness.
“I hurt you,” he said quietly, and she heard the guilt in his voice. “I swear I’ll never hurt you again.”
“No more than is natural for a first time,” Ashley assured him, pressing a kiss to his chest. “And the pleasure far outweighed any discomfort. You were… Raven, that was extraordinary.”
“You’re extraordinary,” he corrected, tilting her face up to his.
“I’m never going to be the respectable duchess and I’m sorry that your family name is tainted by mine.” She traced the line of his jaw tenderly. “But I can be the most wonderful mother.”
His eyes grew suspiciously bright. “I should have come to you months ago. Should have been honest instead of hiding behind fear and guilt.”
“We’re being honest now,” Ashley said. “That’s what matters. I just hope we can find a way to make this marriage comfortable and pleasant for us both.”
“I’d like that. My parents had a friendship of sorts; you might even call it love. But it was an arranged marriage. They were lucky. Perhaps I’m lucky too.” He kissed her softly but deeply.
“You look thoroughly ravished,” he said with dark satisfaction as he surveyed his handiwork. “Would you like to stay with me tonight or go to your bedchamber?”
“I’d like to stay.”
“I’d like that too.”