Chapter 31 Talwyn
CHAPTER 31
TALWYN
S he smelled him before she heard him. The scent of ?r and soil. Another ever-changing scent was on the winds, too.
A Shifter.
Stellan speci?cally.
She was curled in the middle of a couple other wolves. A head rested on her hip. Her own head was lying on Maliq’s neck. She’d been in her wolf form for nearly three days now. They’d run under the moon. They’d drank from streams. The other wolves had hunted, but she couldn’t bring herself to eat raw meat from a fresh kill, not even as a wolf. She relished the idea of staying in this form forever. Of not having to go back and face the shit-storm that had exploded before her.
Tarek. Azrael.
The Avonleyans.
But she did need to eat.
She sat up, shaking her powerful limbs out. Her ears ?attened to her head as she spotted Azrael sitting against the trunk of a giant tree. A mountain cat with olive green eyes sat rigidly beside him. Stellan always preferred feline forms whenever possible. A tawny-colored wolf lay at his feet.
She planted her paws, staring down the Earth Prince, a low growl in her throat.
“Talwyn, you have had time,” Azrael said. “It is time to come home and face this.”
She didn’t do anything. Didn’t move. It’s not like she could say anything in response, even if she wanted to.
There was a ?ash of gold light, and Stellan stood beside Azrael. He was shirtless, but wore the same lightweight pants he often sported in Siofra. She couldn’t help but wonder where his clothes went when he shifted. Would she have clothes when she ?gured out how to shift back?
Ilyas was instantly on his feet before Stellan, and the Alpha ran a hand down his back as he said, “Come with us, your Majesty. Arianna and Sariah are waiting for you. We will help you hone your gift.”
She still didn’t move, and the rest of her pack had woken, moving restlessly behind her. She glanced back to Maliq watching her, his jade green eyes seeming to await her decision.
“You must be getting hungry,” Stellan said casually. “If you do not want to shift back, then at least let us teach you how to hunt so you can eat.”
Azrael sighed, getting to his feet. An earth portal appeared to his left. “Let’s go, Talwyn.” When she still refused to move a muscle, he said,
“You need explanations to accept this, and I will tell you what I know. Afterwards, if you want to come back to the wolves, I will not follow.”
With a huff, she ?nally found it in her to move, taking a few steps to the portal. A ?are of soft green light in her periphery had her glancing back to ?nd Maliq gone.
Talwyn stepped through the earth portal directly into a sand cave of some sort. There were solid pillars throughout the structure, and in the center stood a jaguar and a tiger. As the portal closed behind the males, a sharp cry had her looking to the ceiling where a red-tailed hawk was ?ying. It dove for the ground, shifting and landing mid-stride. Arianna went straight to her brother, the beads in her long hair clinking as she moved.
“Took you long enough,” she said in her sultry tone.
“Not now, Arianna,” Stellan replied, then let out a yelp when she sent energy skittering across the sand to his feet. “Really?” he said in agitation.
“We are still ?ghting, Stellan,” she said airily. “This does not change that.” Stellan rolled his eyes at his sister, turning to look down at Talwyn, but before he could say anything, Arianna said, “Get out. You and Ilyas go get her some food. Sariah and I will get started.”
Talwyn sat, watching the siblings. Arianna didn’t even bother to see if her orders were followed. She clearly just expected them to be. She’d always admired the Beta from afar. The female couldn’t care less what anyone else thought of her. She was ?erce and commanding, expecting obedience and ?ghting for what she wanted, even if she fought by herself. And while she may currently be ?ghting with the Alpha, the siblings were a force to reckon with.
Which is why she wanted them on her side when she came for Avonleya.
“I am not leaving,” Azrael snarled, his threat clear in his tone if Arianna should try to force him, which had the Alpha snarling his own warning at him.
Stellan and Ilyas left the sand cave, and Arianna leveled her gaze on Talwyn. “I cannot say I am surprised you shifted into a wolf,” she mused, slowly circling Talwyn. “You have Maliq as your spirit animal. You are bonded to Celeste, and your mother’s other form was a wolf.”
At the mention of her mother, Talwyn was on her feet.
“I am going to assume you only have one other form like Queen Henna did, which is why Sariah is here. How I shift is different from how others with only one form shift.”
At her name, Sariah slunk forward, only coming to a stop when she was nose-to-nose with Talwyn.
“But,” Arianna continued, “you can shift energy, matter, ether, which is something most Shifters cannot do. So go to that place, your Majesty. However you shift energy at will, go there.”
There was another ?ash of light, and Sariah was kneeling before her, the female’s face as close as it had been in her feline form. “There is a thread,” she said softly. “It connects your animal form to your Fae form. Look for it. Hunt for it in your soul.”
Talwyn let out a huff. She’d done this before. She’d known she should be able to shift her form. It was in her blood. It was in her being as her mother’s daughter. She’d spent a ridiculous amount of time searching her well of power for something that could help her shift her form, but had never been successful. For years she’d done so with no success.
“It is there,” Arianna said softly, as though she had read her thoughts. Talwyn felt her hand run along her side. “You think it is not, but it is the thread back to yourself.”
“It hides because you are in pain,” Sariah added. “It is hidden because you do not wish to ?nd it.”
“But you must,” Arianna said, her hand continuing to glide along the fur of Talwyn’s wolf form. “Most of us shift for the ?rst time due to some sort of fear or trauma. For me, it was when my father died. I stayed in the form of a small fox for nearly a week. Stellan shifted for the ?rst time after he made his ?rst kill with a sword.”
Sariah had shifted back into her jaguar form, sprawling out on her side on the sandy ?oor, as if settling in for a long wait.
Jamahl had shifted into his human form and had his arms wrapped around his Beta’s waist from behind. Arianna had stopped petting Talwyn, reaching up to loop a hand behind his neck as she studied her a bit more.
“This will take many hours, possibly days, Prince,” she commented, addressing Azrael, who was standing off to the side, his arms crossed and looking pissy as always. Talwyn bared her teeth at him when he met her gaze. Arianna glanced between the two before she ventured, “Perhaps you should go, Prince. You will make this more dif?cult.”
“As I have already said, I am not going anywhere. She will shift and leave before giving me a chance to speak,” he replied, his stare ?xed on Talwyn.
He wasn’t wrong. That had been her plan.
Talwyn plopped down on her achingly empty belly, her head coming to rest between her paws. She closed her eyes, looking into that well in her soul. She dug beneath the winds and the breezes, the ?owers and the soil. She let everything fade away around her. She drowned out the voices of the others. But there was no thread. Nothing that would pull her back to her Fae form.
She didn’t know how long she lay there before the smell of braised meat reached her nose. Her eyes snapped open, her mouth watering.
But she went still when she found Azrael holding the platter of food, everyone else having disappeared.
“We need to talk,” Azrael ground out. “Or rather, you need to listen while I speak. Perhaps you being stuck in your wolf form is for the best right now.”
Talwyn snarled at him, snapping her teeth, but he didn’t acknowledge the action. He simply set the platter of food down on the ground before he slid down the wall of the sand cave. He rested his forearms on his bent knees, clasping his hands loosely in front of him.
“My grandfather was born in Avonleya. He came over during the Great War. He was a warrior in one of their armies, a commander. As I told you, he was a quarter Avonleyan. Fae used to reside over there and lived among the Avonleyans. Whether or not they still do, I cannot say. There are so many different versions of history now, it is hard to say what is truth.
“I never met my grandfather. He met my grandmother here. A powerful, earth-wielding Fae female. He’d been stationed in the Earth Court for most of his time as a commander from what I was told. My father was born during the war, and it was when things were beginning to turn in the favor of Deimas and Esmeray that my grandfather decided to take the Royal seat of the Earth Court. My father was young. Too young to understand the politics. Our bloodline was always strong in earth magic, but because of the Avonleyan power in his blood, my grandfather easily defeated the sitting prince. Why he found the middle of a war to be a good time for such political upheaval, I do not know, but he won and became the Earth Prince.”
Talwyn didn’t acknowledge Azrael as he spoke. She just ate the steaming beef and chicken that had been prepared for her. But she was listening, hanging on to every word.
“My grandfather prized power, presumably because he would have been considered less powerful in Avonleya due to his heritage. I cannot say for sure, but based on the fact that he immediately set out to ?nd the most powerful earth female for my father to marry, I can say it is a safe bet, especially as my father was obsessed with the same. One can only assume he was raised in such a manner. It is why an arrangement was made between my father and Eliza’s father, before either of us was even conceived. I was born a century before her, but my father waited to see if her family would produce a female.”
She looked up at him at that. She had known, of course, that Eliza had been promised to him. She didn’t know all the details, only that her power had manifested as ?re rather than earth, and her father had disowned her. But not before Marking her to be unable to bear children, to carry on the ?re magic in her veins. He killed her mother before leaving Eliza in the Fire Court.
Azrael seemed to sense where her thoughts had gone, because he said, “I tried to ?nd her. When I learned what her father had done to her, I tried to ?nd her. It had never mattered to me. Marriage was …” He paused, as if trying to ?nd the right wording. “It was a political alliance. That is how I was raised to view marriage and relationships. Any relationship worth putting time into was for alliances only. Marriage was for producing powerful heirs to maintain our control of the Court. Beyond that?” He shrugged. “But I was not outraged to learn of her magic. She certainly did not deserve what her father did to her. By the time I had tracked her down, she had already been found by the Fire Court, further straining relations that had been tense my entire life.”
Talwyn had stopped eating. She didn’t look at him, but it made sense, she supposed. His focus had always been on what was best for their Courts, what was best for her throne. This wasn’t new information. It was just an explanation as to why.
And had absolutely nothing to do with him not telling her of his Avonleyan bloodline.
“That is getting off topic, though,” Azrael continued. “My father and mother were killed by Esmeray before everything with Eliza happened. Sorin and I may have ascended to our thrones at the same time, but I still had a century on him. I had been working at my father’s side for decades. The power transition was nothing for me. Not like it was for the other Royals.”
He spoke so casually about it all. Talwyn wanted to ask if he’d even grieved the death of his parents. Had he felt anything at all?
“My father’s Inner Court became my Inner Court. I knew them all well by this point, and when my father’s Third faded and crossed the Veil, it was only natural that his son took his place. That is how Tarek Ordos became my Third. I knew that his family used to occupy my throne. I knew that it was his family my grandfather had challenged and bested. When he won, the Ordos family became part of his Inner Court. Resentment at that time would only be natural, but they served my grandfather and father loyally. I did not realize that such resentment still simmered centuries later. I never anticipated that such a need for revenge would cause him to seek an even higher seat of power, but looking back on it now, it all makes sense.”
Her eyes narrowed and a low growl escaped her at what he was implying— that Tarek had sought her out because of her claim to the throne and not because he was her twin ?ame.
“If Tarek would challenge me now, he would still lose,” Azrael said, apparently not noticing her growl or choosing to ignore her. Probably the latter. “My Avonleyan blood will always give me a slight advantage, but it is blood I did not even know I possessed until I was well into my second century of life. My father told me that when the Avonleyans fell back, my grandfather did not want it known that he was descended from there, even if only a fraction of our bloodline could be traced back. Documents were altered. People were sworn to secrecy. Oath Marks were given, and eventually, it was forgotten. Traveling was thought to be a rare gift like the Ash Riders and the Wind Walkers. Although, knowing the things I know now, I would venture to guess those are Avonelyan gifts in some way or another as well.”
Talwyn had sat, watching him as he spoke, trying to absorb and process everything he was telling her. Still waiting for him to get to the part about why he had never told her.
“I did not think it mattered. Not anymore,” he said. “In fact, I rarely thought of the fact that I carry Avonleyan blood in my veins. Not until the day you told me of your plans for revenge. I had been your Second for only a few years when you con?ded that in me, what you and Ashtine dreamed of one day achieving. I thought of telling you then, but I could not tell if you were serious or if it was just that— a dream.
“Until the day you arrived in my chambers after Tarek had been attacked, when we thought he had died. When Sorin became so lost to his own failure and Cyrus’s grief …” Azrael trailed off, clearly reining in his dislike for the Fire Prince. And even though she was furious with him, even though she felt a level of betrayal she hadn’t felt since that day with Sorin, something in her empty chest squeezed slightly at seeing him so angry on her behalf. He ground his teeth together, his jaw clenching, and it took several seconds before he was able to go on.
“You slept in my chambers that night, and when you woke, there were no tears. There was no grief or sorrow. Only fury and revenge stared back at me as you said, ‘We have work to do, Prince.’ And I knew. In that moment, I knew that if I ever told you of my heritage, you would never be able to see beyond it. You woke with a renewed craving for what you felt was justice. You woke wanting to hurt those you felt were responsible for the pain you were refusing to acknowledge, and I didn’t … I didn’t know how to help you through that, Talwyn.” He met her gaze, and Talwyn almost lurched back from him. His eyes looked haunted, almost desperate for something. He looked at her as if she could give him whatever it was he was seeking, and she had no idea what he wanted from her. “I still do not know how to help you see that your anger is misplaced.
That going after an entire kingdom, a kingdom you will likely fall to, will not make you feel better. Will not atone for the death of your parents. The death of Tarek. The betrayal of Sorin. I do not know how to help you understand that giving your life for this will accomplish nothing but leave your kingdom with an heirless throne.”
Talwyn opened her mouth to argue, before remembering she couldn’t speak.
Azrael got to his feet, looking down at her from his towering height. “I know you feel outnumbered, Talwyn. I know you feel as though Ashtine and I have turned against you by pulling out of this quest for vengeance. I hope that you see that is not the case, before you do something incredibly foolish. But, for the sake of your appearance, I would suggest that you and I at least appear to still be aligned in our goals. When the time comes to make hard choices, if we still do not agree, I will walk away. I will let you go, if that is what you desire.”
He turned then, walking out of the cave, and leaving her standing alone.
He was wrong. Her anger was not misplaced. It was targeted right at the people who caused all of this.
She began pacing back and forth in the cave, everything he’d told her running through her mind. None of it excused him. None of it was a valid reason for not telling her what ran through his veins. If he was right, the same ran through Ashtine’s veins as well. Did she know? Was she keeping the same secret from her? A growl rippled from her at that thought.
Of course she felt outnumbered. Because she was. The two people she thought would stand beside her through anything, had all but told her they would stand against her if forced to choose. Ashtine may have chosen her over the winds, but the princess also resented her for it. And Azrael?
I will walk away. I will let you go if that is what you desire.
She didn’t need anyone to ?ght for her. She didn’t need anyone at all. Would it be nice? Perhaps, but the Fates had obviously decided she didn’t deserve such a thing.
She needed no one. Not Sorin.
Not Tarek. Not Ashtine. Not Azrael.
No. All she needed was the head of the Avonleyan king lying at her feet while the kingdom burned to nothing around her.
Because Azrael was wrong.
Tasting that justice, achieving that revenge, would change everything. She didn’t care what happened to the kingdom after she was done with it. There wouldn’t be anything left to rule over anyway. There wouldn’t be anyone left to use her people for their own gain, just to abandon them.
As that calm, fury-?lled clarity settled over her, she saw that glimmering thread in her soul. It wove among her winds and ?owers, the ether buzzing around it. She grabbed hold of it, tugging until she felt her body changing, morphing, shifting.
Until she stood on two feet, dressed in the same clothing she had been wearing at the meeting with Scarlett.
She needed to pay the Queen of the Western Courts a visit. It was time to ?nd these keys.
It was time to ?nally end this for good.