Chapter 43
CHAPTER 43
T he silence envelops me as I step through the portal, so sudden it makes me dizzy.
On the craggy earth of Avalon, I catch my breath in the quiet.
For the entirety of my dragon flight, the storm roared around me. Here, I’m left with silence and emptiness—Mordred’s only companions for centuries.
The air is warmer here, and even if my clothes are still half-frozen, my teeth stop chattering. Spring has arrived in Avalon.
I kneel and take a deep breath, inhaling the scents of Avalon’s soil, and apples, and the gnarled roots of the oak trees nearby.
I was so close. A few more days with Talan, and maybe I could have eased him into the truth, little by little. I could have controlled the narrative, told the story the way it needed to be told.
But maybe I’m delusional. Really, it was doomed from the beginning.
I push myself back, resting on a broken column. Only now do I realize that Mordred isn’t here like he usually is. Every other time I’ve come through the portal, he’s been waiting for me in the shadows. This time, I’m alone.
I stand, brushing dirt from my leggings, and that’s when I see it—movement in the darkness, a shift in the shadows. Mordred steps forward, taking form from the night. His crown catches the moonlight, a sharp halo of spiked silver.
He frowns, assessing me. “Daughter.”
I clear my throat. “It’s been a while.”
“You look terrible. Just dreadful.”
I nod. “Thanks, man. I feel like shit.”
His frown deepens. “Care to explain what happened? You and the prince left on the dragon a few days ago. Then you shoved his soldiers to get into the portal, and now you’re here, smelling of blood, dirt, and defeat.”
I could only thank the gods his little silver moth hadn’t been watching Talan bring me to orgasm in the hunting lodge.
“Talan figured it all out.”
“Figured out what?”
“Everything. That I work for Avalon Tower as an undercover agent. That I’m demi-Fey.” I let out a sigh. “And in the heat of the moment, I may have also mentioned that his throne belongs to me.”
His eyes narrow. “First of all, the throne belongs to me . I’m not dead yet. But yes, you are the heir, eventually . Apart from that, nothing you just said makes sense.”
“Okay, well, that’s what happened. I had to drop the veil on my mind, and he recognized me. He knew I stole the map from him, and he realized I’m an agent of Avalon Tower.”
“If the Dream Stalker truly found out who you were, he would tear your body limb from limb. He would trap you in a nightmare in which every piece of flesh is flayed from you. He’d have his dragon slowly roast you. Probably all three if we’re being realistic.”
I swallow hard, a lump rising in my throat. “He wouldn’t.” For maybe the first time ever, I’m not doubting Talan at all. “It’s an act. Yes, he can be cold and brutal. I’ve seen him slit a man’s throat over dinner. But it’s all calculated. He doesn’t kill unless he needs to.”
Mordred lets out a cold laugh. “But he did have to kill you, didn’t he? You infiltrated his castles—more than once. You stole from him. You were there to kill him. And what, he just let you go? The only reason he did that is because it suits his purposes. It’s a trick.”
“He didn’t want to kill me, but he couldn’t keep me there. So, he sent me home.” I don’t know why I think Mordred, of all people, needs to hear this, but I add, “I really hurt him, you know?”
Mordred’s golden eyes gleam with suspicion. “I assure you, the Dream Stalker didn’t let you go because you hurt his feelings .” He says the last words in a high-pitched, mocking voice.
I clench my jaw, resisting the urge to punch him. “I’ve had a very long day. I’d like to go home now before I get into another fistfight.”
He sighs, folding his arms. “Very well. I’ll keep watching him and get to the bottom of this. And you need to go quickly back to Avalon Tower to find out what’s happening there.”
“What do you mean? Aren’t you watching and listening all the time?”
A line forms between his dark eyebrows, and he hesitates. “Something happened to my moth. I can’t see anything there now.”
“What? How?”
“I told you the Pendragons were working on something. A weapon to win this war. And I found out where they were hiding it—beyond a secret door at the top of Merlin’s Tower.”
I cast my mind back to the first time I entered the Great Hall of the Round Table. Sir Kay stepped into the room through a secret door hidden behind the portrait of Merlin.
I nod. “I think I might know where that is.”
“I sent my moth through the door a few days ago. I caught a glimpse of the room beyond, but then it vanished. I have to find out what’s beyond that door.”
“Why are you so desperate to learn what they’re up to?”
“Nia, I am the true king of the Fey. They are my subjects. And whatever the Pendragons have there is designed to kill those I am bound to keep safe.”
“They said it’s supposed to stop the war,” I point out. “If it’s there, Sir Kay knows about it. He wouldn’t let them do anything truly horrible?—”
“Really? Are you sure? Didn’t he sign your death warrant?”
My eyebrows flick up. After a second, I ask, “Did Sir Kay really sign off on that? I assumed Wrythe manipulated him.”
Mordred’s lips curl in a faint smile. “I was watching things as they transpired. True, it was Wrythe Pendragon who came up with the idea. And then he nagged Sir Kay day and night about it. Kept pouring wormwood into his ear, poisoning his thoughts. Wrythe convinced Sir Kay that there was only one chance to do it, that they had to be sure. He said you were compromised. And you were, really, weren’t you? Sir Kay is old and weak, and Wrythe has been building up political power in Avalon Tower. Sir Kay knew that if he didn’t capitulate, he might have a fully-fledged rebellion on his hands. So, he agreed. They sacrificed you. Didn’t I tell you not to trust anyone?”
The weariness goes all the way down to my bones. “It’s a very lonely existence, isn’t it?”
“Sir Kay is the one who wrote the orders, with that Seneschal whispering in his ear. He ordered two magical explosions, one for the king, and one for his son. Only the information about Talan was correct. Sir Kay knew you would die as well. That’s why I sent my moth to you, to warn you that your life was in danger. But you see, daughter of mine, why I refuse to put my trust in Sir Kay’s honorable character?”
My head is spinning. “So, Avalon Tower’s leadership is all against me. I can’t go back there, Mordred. They tried to kill me.”
“You will go back there anyway and take another moth with you,” Mordred goes on. “We need to find out what’s in that room?—”
“Mordred, they want me dead. And that was before I refused a direct order. As far as they’re concerned, I’m an enemy. Maybe Talan let me live, but I’m not sure Wrythe is quite as merciful.”
“I understand,” he says quietly. “Long ago, I was betrayed, too, by Merlin. A knife in the back that cut deep. And I shut myself up alone for days, hiding from danger and agonizing about the unfairness of it all.”
“You did?”
“Of course not!” His eyes blaze, molten gold under the silver light. “What do I look like? I am a descendant of Morgan! When I was betrayed, I struck back and killed Arthur and half his allies and nearly managed to destroy Merlin. I do not mope, and I do not hide, and you , daughter, will not do so, either. You will go straight back there and show them who you really are! You don’t get my sympathy. Sympathy is for weak humans, but you are forged from my blood and bones. The daughter of a king. Return to Avalon Tower, and take my moth with you. You will crush your enemies.”
I stare up at him. “Fine, I’ll go back there, but I’m not taking your fucking moth,” I say through gritted teeth. “You’ll get any information you need from me.”
“There it is.” He steps closer, his shadow stretching long over the broken earth. “There’s your strength. You had me worried.”
To my shock, he clumsily hugs me. He smells of moss and sweet violets.
I let myself relax into this hug for just a second. Then I pull away. “I’m still not taking your moth. But I will come to your party when we’re done.”
His eyes shine. “Fine. Just find out what’s in that room. And if you change your mind about the moth?—”
“I won’t.”
“ If you change your mind, return. I’ll give you my moth, and once you hide it within your room in the castle, I’ll be able to look out for you as I did before. It is, after all, my job to protect the Fey, and that includes you.”
My stomach rumbles, and I realize exactly how starving I am.
“You need to eat, daughter. I have dried figs and leeks.”
Dried figs and leeks. I’ve never spent much time worrying about how Mordred fed himself, but of course he wouldn’t have many options here on an isolated island.
I shake my head. “I’ll eat back in Camelot.” I turn away, heart pounding. “Goodbye, Mordred.”
“Goodbye, Nia. And good luck.”