Chapter 11
Ruaridh did not shift his gaze, even as Logan whispered something in his ear. He just nodded in approval before turning to them with a bright smile.
“It appears we have a celebration to plan,” he announced, turning to Grannie Ava.
An event? Violet thought, horror surging through her. Surely he had not thought to move up their wedding without her knowledge?
They had not finished the items on her list. He had promised to train her to be an expert horsewoman and swimmer before their marriage. Surely, he did not intend to change his mind without consulting her?
She was going to give him hell if he tried.
Locking eyes with him, she studied his face for any clue as to the nature of the celebration that was to be planned, but his expression remained impassive, giving away nothing.
That was one of the traits that made him a good warrior, this ability to hide his thoughts from others, but at that moment, she resented it.
“What celebration, Da?” Keira asked, breaking the tension. “Are we going to eat haggis there?”
“Aye, lass,” Ruaridh replied with an indulgent smile. “Ye can have all the haggis ye want. Just daenae overdo it.”
“Nay, I willnae overdo it. I finished me porridge today,” she said, gesturing to her plate that still had bites of porridge on it.
“Ye did well, lass,” he praised with a laugh, reaching out to ruffle her hair.
The action warmed Violet’s heart; it showed his devotion to his daughter. He was a great father, and she had no fear that he would care in the same way for any children the good Lord deemed fit to bless them with.
“The celebration is in Keira’s honor,” Logan picked up, his face splitting into a smile. “It is going to be very big. The Laird hopes to invite the entire clan and even our friends from neighboring clans.”
He said the last part with a private smile, as if there was someone he hoped would come as well. A love interest, perhaps?
It seemed that Grannie Ava had come to the same conclusion, because when their eyes met, she was smiling knowingly at him. It seemed that they might be planning Logan’s wedding before theirs if his tendre for this unknown woman blossomed.
“Lest I forget,” Logan added. “The Laird plans to hold the wedding within the celebration week. He is hoping to invite lairds from both the Highlands and the Lowlands to come enjoy the feast that will end with a grand wedding. That seems like a grand plan, in me opinion, do ye nae think?” he asked, locking gazes with Keira, who was now jumping up and down in excitement, her food forgotten.
Instead of sharing in their joy, Violet felt her heart sink.
It seemed it was happening without any regard for her readiness or lack of it.
Funny, considering that she was already talking herself into marrying Ruaridh.
But now, when the plan was concrete, the date fixed, she could feel the familiar invisible noose closing around her neck, robbing her of her freedom, plunging her into helplessness and uncertainty.
That was her biggest fear: that the security she hoped to gain by marrying him might be fickle, that he might wake up one day and find that the passion between them was not enough to build a life with her.
That his lost regard for her might make her a stranger in her own home, that one day he might give ears to the suggestions of his clansmen to marry a proper, full-blooded Scottish lass.
Her fears were endless, and while she knew him to be upright and responsible, she also knew that human nature was fickle at best and that marriage to him kept her at the mercy of that fickle human nature, far away from home and everything she knew.
Not that she had any family that would protect her if he turned, but at least she knew her way around English society and could devise a plan of escape easily.
But out here, in the brutish Highlands, escape was trickier.
One was most likely to be attacked by wild beasts in the woods before they were even able to reach safety.
Her train of thought only went to show that she was still very far from trusting the man who was to be her husband, even though he had done everything right to win her trust.
She needed to give herself time to build that trust before she jumped into marriage with him.
“It appears I have a lot of things to attend to, lass,” Ruaridh was saying to Keira, patting her cheek and rising to his full height. “I will see ye at dinner.” He nodded to Grannie Ava and Violet before taking his leave.
Violet needed to stop this plan now before it progressed beyond control.
She rose from her seat and, following after him, jogging to keep up with his fast strides.
“I wish to speak with you,” she said when she drew level with him.
“Ye can speak with me, I’m listening,” he replied, slowing his pace to match hers.
“In private,” she added, waiting until he nodded before leading him to an alcove away from listening ears.
“Ye ken ye daenae have to drag me to a very dark place to get what ye want?” he teased as he leaned against the wall, watching her steadily, making her feel like prey under a predator’s gaze.
Ruaridh was definitely a predator because she did not think he had to take more than a few steps towards her for her to fly into his arms, offering herself to be devoured. Even now, her body was reacting to his proximity, warming in places she could not mention and turning her brain to mush.
Something about this man was hypnotic, and he knew it, and he certainly did not have any qualms about using it to his advantage.
Well, she could not afford to lose her head now. Their future depended on it.
“I wish to speak with you about something important,” she began.
“Ye can speak. Me ears are peeled to listen.” Ruaridh’s expression turned serious.
“You cannot hold the wedding this soon,” she said, swallowing hard against a suddenly dry throat.
Ruaridh was quiet for a while, his head bowed while he considered her request.
“Why?” he spat, anger flashing in his eyes even though his body remained relaxed against the wall. “Do ye have another suitor in mind? Someone from England? Someone refined and nae rough and brutish like me?”
His outburst took her aback, but she understood where it came from. Her discomfort when she had first come here, her difficulty adapting to the way of life of Highlanders—it was easy for anyone watching to assume that she was eager to return home.
If she had any reasonable family left back in England, his fears would be valid, since she might long to return there.
But now that she thought about it, Ruaridh, his daughter, and his grandmother had been more of a family to her than her father had ever been, and she had no doubt that they would defend her against anything or anyone who sought to harm her.
But for how long? That was the risk.
She needed time to decide if she could take that risk.
“No. You know I have no suitor waiting for me in England,” she replied calmly, meeting his gaze. “I just wanted to tell you that we have to finish the items on my list before we marry.”
“I believe it is almost finished,” he said, his brow furrowing with confusion.
“Well, I added a few more items.”
“And what might they be?” He pushed off the wall and took a step closer, making her heart flip.
“I want a chance to eat haggis and watch the famous Highland games,” she replied.
“Well, ye are in luck,” he said with a triumphant smile. “The celebration will feature several Highland games, and there will be more than enough haggis to feed the whole of Scotland.”
“I doubt that very much,” she snorted, stepping back to put space between them. “Keira would eat her own weight in haggis. She is looking forward to it, so I suspect that your friends might not have any to eat if she has anything to say about it.”
“Nay matter how she loves it, she cannae eat it all day,” he said with a laugh. “And daenae underestimate Cook, she is very capable of providing more haggis than we need. Daenae worry, I will make sure to get ye the best haggis available to ensure ye enjoy the games.”
“I do not think Keira would approve of that plan.” She gave a small smile
“She would survive,” he assured her. “Besides, ye seem to be her favorite person in the castle now. I reckon she will forgive ye anything.”
“I do not know if she values me above her beloved haggis.”
“Trust me, she does. She has never taken to anyone as easily as she has with ye.”
That response set off a curious reaction in her.
While she was glad to be held in high esteem by her little friend, that simple fact was disrupting her feeble attempts at stalling the wedding.
It was almost as if Ruaridh had come prepared with counterarguments to disable her defense, and it did not help that all his points made sense and that she was the one who sounded stupid, plotting to destroy a perfect plan.
Except that it was not perfect for her, and she was going to be the bride!
“I really wish to attend a full Highland Games. The type that lasts for a week.”
“Well, that could be arranged. I will ask Logan to add more games to the list. It would just be the grandest feast to end the Highland games with our wedding,” he said with a smile, his gaze burning into hers as if he wanted to see into her soul.
Breaking their stare, she stepped back further.
“I don’t think that is wise, dragging them to a wedding after such strenuous games. We should give them time to rest before they find their way home.”
“Ye daenae need to worry about that.” Ruaridh waved a dismissive hand. “There is nothing we Highlanders love more than a wedding. Trust me, they would be glad to attend. It will be enjoyable, daenae worry.”
“But I do not want the wedding!” she blurted.
She clapped a hand over her mouth in a bid to hold the words back, except they had already escaped, and now Ruaridh was looking at her strangely.
What was she going to do now?